The Life They're Meant to Lead
by Lori2279
Summary: When Blair finds herself in trouble of Chuck's making, she finds out if she can get herself through it or if Chuck's really the man she always knew he could be.
1. Chapter 1

Title: The Life They're Meant To Lead

Author: Lori2279

Summary: When Blair finds herself in trouble of Chuck's making, she finds out if she can get herself through it or if Chuck's really the man she always knew he could be.

Author's Notes: First Gossip Girl fic. I have to say I am in love with Chuck and Blair. I also have to say a HUGE thank you to my beta, kaela097, whose stories I adore. Okay so review.

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"You can't do that Chuck," Serena told him.

"Why the hell not?"

Serena sighed, "Because Blair's pregnant."

"What," Chuck stared at her. "I saw her today. She would have said something."

"And when you saw her, she was in a cab and you were standing on the street. What was she supposed to do? Say 'I'm pregnant' and then have the cab drive away?"

Chuck looked at her and shook his head, "No. Someone would've found out and tried to find me."

"No one else knows and as for someone finding you; how? God, you didn't even call _Nate_ all summer. You were shot, you could've died and you didn't even think to call your family?"

"What family," he snapped.

"Oh don't give me that crap. My-_our_ mother is ready to start dragging every river in the world. I had to go to the morgue today because someone washed up on shore with your identification with your blood on it."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. The whole time I'm there I'm thinking how the hell am I going to tell Blair and Mom and everyone else who ever gave a damn about you if your body was on that slab?"

A muscle in Chuck's jaw twitched as he averted his gaze to stare at something besides his step-sister.

Serena let out a short humorless laugh. "Right. You don't give a damn. Well, it's nice to know you didn't leave Chuck Bass completely behind. I hope you enjoy your new life and your latest courtesan, _Henry_, because as far as I am concerned, my brother died in an alleyway in Prague."

Chuck looked stricken, "Serena."

"No. You're choosing your way and I'm gonna help Blair choose hers. Don't bother trying to come after us. I'm switching our tickets and getting us on the first plane out of here. We're going home."

"You know it'll be just as easy for me to find you in New York as it would've been here. All I have to do is show up in Blair's building."

"If you can get yourself back before your accounts are frozen, you'll find yourself arrested," Serena threatened as she walked away.

_Deet-deet._

Serena waited until she reached the street before answering, "Hello?"

"_I got a ticket on the next plane back to the states,"_ Blair said.

"I'll be home in ten minutes," Serena scanned the street for a taxi.

"_You stay. Enjoy your last night in Paris. I'll see you at home_."

"Blair?"

"_I talked to my dad. He's giving me access to my trust fund his mother left me as soon as he can. My mom is giving me access to the one she and Daddy set up for me, although Daddy's being a lot more gracious about it than she is."_

"Blair, you don't have to do this on your own," Serena said.

"_You've been amazing all summer, S, but I need to start doing things for myself."_

"B," Serena protested.

"_I'll be okay. I love you."_

"I love you, too," Serena said before they hung up. "Dammit."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

_**Spotted: Our own Queen B landing at JFK sans one best friend. Trouble in paradise B?**_

Blair closed her phone without another thought and tossed it into the river. She'd get a new one as soon as she could. Gossip Girl was another life and that was over right now.

She had other things to think about.

She put a hand over her stomach and closed her eyes tightly. She'd raise this child right. She wouldn't let him or her ever worry about whether or not their parents loved them. She wouldn't leave for months at a time, and she'd never just dismiss them or their feelings.

Her eyes opened and she watched the sunset before she walked off the bridge towards Penn Station.

Blair Waldorf was dead.

Blair Thayer had some preparation to do as she was going to be a mother in six months time.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck barged into the Waldorf home.

"Blair! Blair," he started to go up the stairs when Dorota appeared at the top. "Where's Blair?"

"Miss Blair not here," she said quietly.

"Where is she?"

"I not know."

"Yes, you do," Chuck watched her come down the stairs. "She tells you everything."

"She not tell me this, Mr. Chuck," the housekeeper slid past him.

"You're lying." He put a hand on Dorota's arm to keep her from moving away. "Where is she, Dorota," he asked as calmly as he could.

Dorota looked at the man who had made Miss Blair so happy and so sad. She knew he was a good boy and that he loved Miss Blair and that Miss Blair loved him.

"Miss Blair gone away," she said quietly. "She pack her room and leave."

Chuck stared at the maid and then at the top of the stairs as if he were waiting for Blair to step out and say 'Just kidding.'

"Where'd she go," he asked Dorota.

"I not know."

Chuck looked at her again, "Yes, you do. I know you do."

Dorota shook her head.

Just as Chuck was about to start interrogating her a little harder, Serena walked in.

"Blair? Hey are you-" she stopped when she stopped Chuck and Dorota on the stairs. "What are you doing here, Henry, wasn't it?"

"Cut the crap, Serena. Where's Blair?"

"I have no idea."

"You're lying."

"No, actually, I'm not. I don't know where she is. I was hoping she was here. She hasn't been answering her phone."

"Miss Blair gone."

"Gone? Gone where?"

"We were just getting to that. Dorota?"

"I not know where Miss Blair go," the maid said stubbornly.

"But she went somewhere," Chuck pressed.

"Dorota? Dorota, where is-" Eleanor appeared in the foyer and stopped when she saw Serena, Chuck, and Dorota in front of her. "Oh. What's everyone doing here?"

"They look for Miss Blair," Dorota said.

"So am I," Eleanor nodded. "I just received a call from my accountant. It seems Blair's tuition money has been returned because she withdrew from college."

"What," Serena's jaw dropped. "I don't believe this."

"Serena, what are you talking about?"

"She's gone, she doesn't plan on coming back," Serena said and while her words were meant for Eleanor, she didn't take her eyes off of Chuck. "This is your fault," she pointed at her step-brother.

"Not now, Serena," Chuck said pulling out his cellphone as he released the hold he'd had on Dorota's arm. "Andrew Tyler please. This is Chuck Bass. What do you mean he's not there?"

"Would someone like to tell me what's going on?"

"Right after she found out for sure that she was pregnant, Blair saw Chuck. The next thing I know she's getting on a plane for home. Then Chuck comes back to New York and Blair is gone again."

"No not Waldork! Waldor_f_. I was with her for the better part of a year."

"And now he's sending his private investigator after her," Serena motioned towards him. She glared at Chuck for a moment before she pulled something from her purse. "Oh Chuck?"

He looked at her.

"This is yours." Then Serena threw it straight at him and due to the difference in the levels they were standing on it hit Chuck in a very sensitive area. This caused him to double over and drop his phone with a gasp. "I think we both know she would've said yes. Sleep with that because as far as I can see you won't be sleeping with Blair anytime soon." Serena turned to Eleanor. "If I hear from her I'll call you."

"Thank you, Serena."

Serena nodded to Eleanor and then Dorota. When she looked at Chuck she smirked, "You should get some ice for that."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Huge thanks to my beta once again for her advice and inspiration and for her line. I hope everyone enjoys this chapter and just know that I like Vera Bradley.

* * *

Blair leaned out of her window and inhaled the crisp fall air. The little town around her was beginning to wake up, and she had come to truly enjoy the experience of watching it.

She closed her eyes and breathed in deep, smiling when the scent of the first pot of coffee hit her nostrils. It mingled with the scent of freshly baked scones from the small teahouse down the hill and the smell of cupcakes coming out of the oven in the shop across the street. Maybe she'd pick up some of both later on that day, she thought as she padded back inside. While her own cooking was getting better, sometimes she didn't want to wait the time it took to make something before indulging in something sweet, especially with her hormones as out of control as they were.

She smiled in amusement as she thought of herself hysterically crying over the end of a movie she'd watched the previous weekend and then five minutes later she'd been laughing herself silly over some sitcom.

She heard a muffled thump and opened the door before stepping out into the hallway and then heading down the stairs. Passing through what used to be a diner she opened the front door and picked up the papers that had just been delivered. She bypassed the local paper and went straight for the Post, wanting to see if Chuck had put her on the front page again.

She wasn't naive. She knew that the 'hunt for the missing heiress' that had been going on for the last two months was being spearheaded by her ex-boyfriend. She was just glad he wasn't making the knowledge that she was pregnant public, if, of course, he even knew. She just prayed that Serena had kept the knowledge a secret.

She kicked the door closed behind her and the dumped the papers onto the counter that ran alongside the wall. Putting a hand through her newly blonde locks, she sighed as she took in her surroundings.

It was a big space that Blair had no idea what to do with it. She was Eleanor Waldorf's daughter so a clothing store would be the most logical, but it would also make it entirely too easy to be found.

She'd lay odds that Chuck had eyes everywhere just waiting for a new clothing store to open. So no, she definitely couldn't open a clothing store.

So what to do with her building?

The street already had more than enough furniture and antique stores. She really couldn't see herself selling frou-frou things like that god awful woman Vera Bradley designed.

She crossed her arms across her chest and frowned in thought. Maybe what she could do was open up a book/music café. It would be something to attract a younger clientele base. That's what the street could really use considering most of the shops were geared towards an older generation.

Blair unfolded her arms and rubbed her palms together as she began to mentally design the space around her.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Nate stepped out of his room before stopping short at the sight before him. He sighed as he put his bag down and approached the couch where his friend had passed out yet again.

Looking around he noted that there were no bottles of alcohol, which was a surprise, just piles of files and pictures of Blair and even in his sleep Chuck clutched a picture of their ex-girlfriend.

"Blair," Chuck moaned.

_Oh God, not again_, Nate thought to himself. The last time he'd been in the vicinity of Chuck having a dream about Blair it had gotten a little uncomfortable for the both of them.

So Nate did the only thing he could think of. He reached behind Chuck and yanked the pillow the other boy's head was resting on away, causing Chuck's head to drop onto the armrest of the couch.

"Ow," Chuck groaned. "What the hell? Nate?"

"Morning," Nate said nonchalantly. "Sleep well?"

"Until my wake up call, yes. What's the matter with you?"

"You were saying Blair's name in your sleep again. The last time that happened, you and I shared a whole new level of closeness that I never want to repeat."

Chuck grumbled under his breath as he sat up and put the picture of Blair he'd been holding aside.

"So, I take it you haven't had any luck," Nate motioned to the piles around them.

"I keep waiting for Serena to tell me that Blair called her and after S told her how badly we all want her to come back, Blair caved and is on the next plane back here."

"Serena's waiting for the same thing," Nate told him. "I can barely get her to attend class."

Chuck nodded as he arranged the pictures and files in neater piles.

"I was actually hoping you could talk to her."

"About?"

"Not giving everything up just because Blair's not here."

"I doubt I'm someone she wants to talk to," Chuck said. "Why don't you talk to her yourself when you find time away from your busy social calendar?"

"I have talked to her. Lily's talked to her. Eric's talked to her. We think you might do more good."

"The last time Serena and I were in the same room together, she threw Blair's engagement ring at me and told me that I should sleep with that because as far as she could see I wouldn't be sleeping with Blair anytime soon."

Nate sighed, "Okay, fine. You don't want to talk to Serena. How about you talk to me?"

"About?"

"The weather, baseball," Nate stated sarcastically. "Or how about Blair? You're not the only one who's worried about her. I'm worried too. I care too. I know what you're going through."

"Really? Is Blair carrying your child at the moment?"

"No, but you're not the only one who loves her."

"Don't you ever compare what I feel for Blair to what you felt for her," he hissed through clenched teeth.

"I don't want to spend my life with her anymore but that doesn't mean I don't love her."

"Be honest, Nathaniel. You never wanted to spend your life with her."

"That's not true and if not for a night at Victrola, if might be my kid she was carrying right now."

"That's enough Nate," Lily said calmly from the doorway. "Aren't you going to be late for class?"

"Yeah, I am," Nate said after a moment of tense staring between him and Chuck. He left after he grabbed his bag.

Chuck avoided his step-mother's stare as he pretended to read a report.

"I'm not leaving Charles," Lily told him after a moment. "I was disappointed that you didn't come to dinner last night."

"Did you really expect me to?"

"I said I was disappointed," Lily put her purse down and sat on the couch. "Not surprised."

Chuck glanced up and then looked away again. Lily's sympathetic smile was not something he could handle on so little sleep.

"How are you?"

"Great," Chuck responded sarcastically. "I mean why wouldn't I be? Blair's run off pregnant and no one knows where she is. My PI's have turned up _nothing_ and did I mention? Dorota calls every other day crying, blaming me because Miss Blair hasn't called her."

Lily frowned at him, "Well, I hate to be the bearer of more bad news but I wanted you to know that Jenny is going to be visiting soon."

"So, this is your way of telling me not to drop in on you anytime soon?"

"That's not the only reason I came over. I have no problem handling things at Bass for the time being but the board does want to know if they're ever getting you back."

"I tried to work in the beginning, you know that," Chuck said.

"I know. But I also know that sitting here every day staring at pictures of Blair isn't going to do anyone, least of all you, any good."

Chuck closed his eyes, "I can't do anything but think about her and wonder where she is, Lily."

Lily nodded, "Nate's right, you know. Serena's the same way right now."

"Serena wants me badly injured right now. If I tried to talk to her we'd both come away bleeding even worse than we are now."

Lily nodded again and stood up. "I should be going. Jenny will be arriving soon."

Chuck nodded, "Take care, Lily."

"You too."

Lily had almost reached the elevator when Chuck spoke again, "One more thing, Lily. Blair's gone because of the raccoon-eyed miscreant. I don't need that reminder. Keep her away from me."

"Done," Lily said quietly.

"Thank you."


	3. Chapter 3

So thanks for all the replies. I know a lot of people put me on their alerts so I want to hear from you. Thank you to my beta who is so freaking talented I feel lucky she deems me worthy to give her advice to. No Blair in this chapter and I think I went a little hard on Easy J-oops, I mean Little J. I don't know where that Easy thing came from.

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Serena closed her book and sighed. She couldn't concentrate, which was nothing new. She looked around and her gaze fell to a picture of her and Blair at Blair's fifteenth birthday party. Picking it up, she frowned as she traced her friend's smiling face.

Her attention was grabbed by the slamming of a door and then Dan's voice calling for Rufus. She briefly wondered what was going on before the laughter of her brother coming from the hall made her smile. She set the picture down and went out into the hall to greet him. She could use the distraction he was sure to provide.

"Eric? What's so funny," she asked before she caught sight of her brother's companion. "Jenny."

Jenny Humphrey's black-rimmed blue eyes were wide as she stared at her step-sister.

"Hey Serena," Eric said, not noticing his friend's sudden silence. "Sorry if we bothered you. Jen was just telling me a story about her trip up from Hudson."

"You didn't bother me. I couldn't concentrate."

Eric frowned, "Thinking about Blair?"

"Yeah," Serena nodded.

"No one's heard from her yet," Jenny asked. Dan and her dad had told Jenny that Blair had done a disappearing act when they asked her to come visit. It was the only way she felt safe in returning to the 'Big Apple'.

Serena cast a look at Jenny, "No. Not yet. Will you excuse me? I need to go see Nate."

"Bye Serena," Eric said.

"Bye."

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"And she's just standing there acting like she has any right to be here," Serena ranted as she walked back and forth in front of the bench Nate was sitting on. "Then she has the nerve to ask about Blair. Like she gives a rat's ass. The only reason she's even here is because Blair's not. If Blair was in the city you better believe that girl would not be."

"Serena, you need to calm down."

"I'm not going to last the weekend without killing her, Nate."

"Maybe you could stay at the Waldorf penthouse. I'm sure Dorota would love having extra company and someone to feed."

"I can't. Mom's insisting on massive amounts of time together this weekend starting with a family dinner tonight."

"That should be fun," he responded sarcastically.

"Tell me about it. Oh hey, have you talked to Dan lately? He and Rufus were having this intense conversation when I left and all I heard was Rufus saying 'You got Vanessa _what'._

"No, Dan's been kinda underground lately."

"Great," Serena shook her head. "Anyway, thanks for listening Nate. I know it can't be much fun for you to listen to me rant about Jenny."

"It's okay."

"No. I know you've always had a soft spot for her and that you're trying not to take sides and-"

"I miss Blair, too."

"Yeah, I know," Serena smiled sadly. "I better get going. I need to change into something more appropriate for dinner tonight. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye," Nate said as Serena walked away.

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"Pass the chips, please," Eric said motioning to Dan.

Dan passed them over and then took the sour cream from in front of Serena.

"So, Jenny, tell us, how's Hudson," Lily asked.

"It's fine. Mom's been really great."

"That's good to hear," Dan said quietly.

"Although I do miss home so maybe I can transfer back sometime soon."

"You have got a lot of damn nerve," Serena exploded in anger.

"Serena," Eric looked at his sister in surprise.

"Did I say something wrong?"

"No, you didn't Jenny," Rufus said. "This is your home."

"It's Blair's too, but I don't see her anywhere around these days, do you? Of course not, because the only reason you'd dare to step foot here is because she's not here."

"Blair didn't have the right to banish my sister," Dan said.

"But Jenny didn't stay and fight, did she? She left. She agreed to the banishment and the terms by doing so."

"Maybe she just wanted to put some distance between her and Chuck much like Blair probably did," Dan said.

"Oh here we go," Serena said, rolling her eyes.

"This isn't about Blair. This is about Jenny and Chuck. She's a child. He's a man," Rufus said.

"She's older than Blair was when she lost her virginity and the same age as Dan was. I was younger than her when I lost mine. She's no child, Rufus. And while it may have happened with the wrong one, I'm pretty sure the result would've been the same if it had been Nate that Jenny had found that night."

"Alright, Serena. That's enough," Eric said.

"No, it's not," Serena threw her napkin on the table. "But I'm done caring. I'm also done playing happy family for tonight. I'll be back on Tuesday if she's gone. Have a nice night everyone."

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Chuck looked up when he heard the elevator and raised an eyebrow. Instead of it being Nate walking towards him, as he expected, it was Serena.

"Nate's not here."

"That's okay. I'm here to see you."

"Come to yell at me some more," Chuck leaned back against the couch preparing himself for what was sure to be another punishing attack to his ego.

"No. I was just at dinner with the extended van der Humphrey family."

"Jenny included?"

"You know she's in town?"

"Lily informed me."

"Of course she did," Serena dropped her purse and then sat down across from him. "I came to say that I no longer think this was entirely your fault."

"Thank you, I think."

"She came up here, she drank with you, and she went to bed with you. And while you weren't the person she wanted it to happen with, you didn't force her and I am getting really sick of listening to my brother and Rufus and Dan implying that you did."

"She's still in high school," Chuck said. "I should've been the adult. I was the adult."

"Chuck, you were nineteen and thought you had just lost the love of your life. If anything, Jenny took advantage of you."

"I never thought about it like that," Chuck nodded.

"You've had other things on your mind," Serena shrugged. "But I'm done placing all the blame solely on you for why we don't know where Blair is."

"Speaking of which, is Little J staying around because Blair's not here?"

"If she is, you may have another roommate because I cannot live with her."

"You're always welcome," Chuck told her.

"Thank you," Serena said. She checked her watch, "I better go. I told Dorota I'd be there by seven."

"Dorota?"

"I'm staying at the Waldorf's this weekend. Dorota was glad to set up the guest room for me. I think she's looking forward to having someone in the house."

"If you get lonely, you know where Nate and I are."

Serena paused for a moment and then looked at Chuck, "Sunday, okay? We'll have lunch."

"That sounds acceptable."

Serena nodded and headed for the elevator.

"Serena? What changed your mind?"

The blonde turned to look at him, "A few things really but in the end it all came down to one thing."

"And that was?"

"I was your sister first," Serena smiled. "See you Sunday."


	4. Chapter 4

Went a little long on this. But I'm really happy with this chapter and I have a feeling a lot of you will be too. Thanks to my beta for advice and for some of Blair's words.

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"I'm sorry. I'm having what," Blair exclaimed as she looked at her doctor in surprise. She'd gone to her doctor for what she thought would be a routine exam and sonogram only to have it turn into the surprise of a lifetime, even more so than when she learned she was pregnant.

"Twins, Miss Thayer," the doctor looked at her in amusement.

"I can't be. That's-that's," Blair couldn't think of what to say next.

"Two babies at once," her doctor supplied.

"I know that part," Blair snapped as she rolled her eyes. "But-are you sure?"

"Very. Two heartbeats and from what I can tell, one turtle sign."

"A boy and a girl," Blair stared at the image on the machine.

"Yes, indeed," the sonogram technician nodded. "I'll make you a copy for your wall and a copy of the sonogram on DVD."

"Th-Thank you," she stammered out.

"I also have some pamphlets for you about being a first time mother with twins."

"Right," Blair nodded, still staring at the image on the screen.

"You may get dressed and I'll meet you in my office."

"Okay," Blair nodded as she sat frozen in place. Her mind continued to process this new information.

"Miss Thayer, are you alright?"

"A little overwhelmed at the moment but I think I'll be okay."

"Alright then, I will meet you in my office," her doctor repeated.

"I'll be right there," Blair smiled.

The doctor left the room and Blair swung her legs over the side to sit up.

"Twins," Blair whispered to herself with a smile. She could hardly wait to tell-

But Blair didn't know how to finish that thought. Calling Chuck was out of the question as it would just mess up everything she'd been trying to accomplish. Nate had way too much loyalty to Chuck and not enough ability in the lying department to keep his mouth shut. But maybe she could call Serena.

She bit her lip and debated internally before coming to a decision.

0x0x0x0x0x0x0

"Miss Serena. Your phone ring," Dorota said as the blonde came down the stairs.

"Thanks Dorota, I heard it," Serena smiled as she pulled her phone free from her bag and answered it. "Hello?"

"S, it's me. If you're around other people, don't say my name."

"Hi. Can you hold on a minute? I can barely hear you. I need better reception," Serena said before she hurried out onto the balcony of the Waldorf penthouse, closing the door behind her so that Dorota wouldn't overhear the conversation. "Blair? Is that really you?"

"Yes, it's me. How are you?"

"How are _you_? I have been so worried about you since you took off; everyone has."

"I'm sure not everyone has." Blair's thoughts immediately went to Chuck as they so often did.

"Blair, he barely sleeps," Serena spoke her words rapidly. She had so much to tell her friend and not enough breath to do it. "Nate has to force him to eat. My mom is running Bass Industries because all he can do is think about you. He never wants to leave the penthouse because he's afraid you'll call and he'll miss it."

"You told him, didn't you?"

"I had to. He was going to disappear if I didn't."

"So that's why I'm on the front page of the Post every morning," Blair concluded. Everything was beginning to make a little more sense. Chuck's desperation to find her had less to do with being with, but needing to find the children she was carrying.

"Believe me, even if I didn't tell him or you weren't pregnant, you would still be on the front page."

"No, because he would've run off never to be seen again," Blair sighed. "Look, can I trust you not to tell him I called? Because if you do tell him, you will _never_ hear from me again."

Serena sighed. She knew Blair would keep her word on that. But just before she answered a compromise popped into her head. "Okay. I promise I will not tell anyone you called on one condition."

"And what's that?"

"I want to be there when you give birth."

"What?"

"I want to be there when you bring my niece or nephew into this world."

"Well, which one do you want to be there for? The niece or the nephew?"

"What? Blair, you're talking in circles."

"No, I'm having twins."

"What," Serena exclaimed as she nearly dropped her phone off the balcony in surprise.

"Twins. Two babies," Blair said.

"You're kidding me."

"No, definitely not kidding you. I have the sonogram pictures to prove it."

"B, that's amazing. Okay, your secret is safe with me as long as I can be there with you."

"Okay," Blair conceded. "I will call you when it's time."

Serena smiled, "Good. I really miss you."

"I miss you too. Tell me something that's going on there."

"Well, I'm actually enjoying this beautiful late fall day on the balcony of your penthouse."

"What are you doing at my house?"

"Avoiding my house," Serena hedged.

"Why?"

"Because my evil troll of a step-sister is visiting and after the fight I had with our family about her, I didn't want to stay around."

"What is Jenny doing in the city," Blair asked.

"I guess she figured it was safe, seeing as how you were gone and no one knew where you were."

"I don't believe her nerve," Blair seethed.

"I know," Serena shook her head. "Anyway, the guys in our family are so into protecting her that I didn't want to stick around and listen to how Chuck took advantage of poor Jenny all weekend so I called Dorota and asked to stay here this weekend."

"You know you're always welcome to stay there," Blair said.

"That's what she said."

"I can't believe Dan's still defending her after what she did. She wrecked his relationship with Vanessa."

"Blair, what are you talking about?"

"You don't know? Serena, Jenny's the one who sent the picture of you and Dan to Gossip Girl."

"What," Serena screeched.

"Who else would have done it? Rufus," Blair responded with a roll of her eyes. "Jenny would screw over anyone if it meant being able to wrap her skanky, scrawny legs around dimwitted Nate's hips, even her brother. If I were you and had any thoughts of ever having a future with Nate, I'd see to it that Little J finally gets what's coming to her – a one way ticket out of town with no invitation to ever return. Even Brooklyn should be too good for her if you do it right."

"I will kill her," Serena decided.

"Serena, if you kill her, you won't be able to be there when your niece and nephew are born. Go back to your roots."

"What do you mean?"

"Before there was a Queen B, there was a Queen S. Do the legal thing and just crush her," Blair advised.

Serena checked her watch. Jenny should still be at the house. "B, call me later okay? I want to hear more about you and everything you've been doing but right now I have to go annihilate a certain little blonde who's had it way too easy lately."

"Have fun. I love you."

"I love you, too," Serena said. "Bye."

0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0

Jenny zipped up her bag and shouldered it before picking up her jacket. She left her room and went out to the living room to meet her dad.

"Dad?"

"He's upstairs," Serena said from behind her. "I told him I wanted a few moments alone with you before you went back home. I think he was under the impression that I wanted to apologize for the way I acted on Friday."

Jenny turned around, "And you don't?"

"Why should I? It's not as if you've bothered to apologize to any of us."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, Jenny." Serena circled her. "It's really interesting. I thought you and Vanessa were best friends."

"We are."

"And yet you want Nate so badly you'd wreck Dan's relationship with her."

"Look-"

"Shut up. Every single guy in this family jumps to your defense any time Chuck's name is even mentioned but I wonder what they'd do if they knew how truly manipulative you are."

"It doesn't matter because they'll never believe you."

"Really? You don't think so?"

"You're Blair's best friend. You'll say anything to make her look better."

"True. But, why don't we ask them? Dan? Nate? Eric? Rufus?"

Jenny turned around to see her brother, father, Nate, and Eric walking into the room.

None of them looked happy.

"Well, I think I'll be leaving because as much as I would enjoy watching you fall, I have some things to take care of."

"Just a second, Serena," Nate said. Then he turned to Jenny, "I have always given you the benefit of the doubt but to know you did this, that you betrayed almost everyone who cares about you, proves what an idiot I really am. The next time you see me, don't talk to me because I promise you, I won't want to talk to you." He turned back to Serena, "Let's go. I think we need to talk."

Serena nodded and she and Nate left.

Eric studied his step-sister who was also his friend, "I love you but I love Serena too and when it comes down to it, before you and I were siblings or friends, Serena was and always will be my sister first and knowing you could do this to Dan and Vanessa just to get a chance at Nate makes me think I never knew you at all. Don't call. Don't write. I won't answer."

Jenny watched him walk away as black tears fell down her face. Somehow, Eric's rejection hurt worse than Nate's.

"I'll be brief," Dan said. "Vanessa's pregnant and she doesn't think she can trust me to be there. She thinks that I will always go back to Serena because you took something that should never have been made public and used it against both me and Serena because of some pathetic never ending crush on Nate, a guy who has never been interested in you that way." Dan didn't bother to tell his sister not to call or write as he walked away, he knew she got the message.

Jenny looked at Rufus, "Dad-"

"I did not raise you to be this person. I raised you to respect other people, their feelings and their privacy. You are my daughter and I will always love you, but right now, I don't particularly like you. Lily called a car for you. It's downstairs waiting. I will be calling your mother and letting her know what's happened here so that if you had any thoughts of coming back because Blair's not here, she knows not to let you. Get yourself together, Jenny. Then come talk to me."

Jenny nodded and walked out of the penthouse.

0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0

"So, are you okay?"

Serena drew her legs up as she leaned back against the chaise lounge she was sitting on and looked up at the stars that she could see quite clearly from the Waldorf balcony.

"Yeah, I'm okay," she told her best friend. "Nate and I had a long talk today."

"And?"

"I don't know. There's someone else in his life right now."

"Of course there is."

"I can hear you rolling your eyes right now, you do know that, right?"

"I just think you and Nate should try and get it together. You really do go nicely together."

"Thank you for saying that but I don't know. I think if it was going to work, it would've by now."

"You can't say that considering that your last roadblock was caused by Jenny Humphrey and her manipulative bitchery."

"I don't know," Serena shook her head.

"Do not give up," Blair ordered. "If you love Nate and I know you do, then you need to get him back."

"And what about you?"

"I don't know," Blair admitted. "I will probably always love Chuck but I just don't know if I can ever trust him again."

"He really misses you," Serena said. "I honestly think he'll look for you for the rest of his life. And while I should probably be sorry for telling him, I just can't be because if I hadn't he'd have disappeared and I couldn't stand it if I'd lost you both at once."

"Take care of them both, okay Serena? I'll call again soon. I miss you."

"I miss you too," Serena closed her phone and wiped the tears that fell down her face away.


	5. Chapter 5

Thank for all the replies once again. I love reading them and it does encourage me to write faster. Major props to my beta who was also a co-writer for this chapter. And in case I haven't mentioned it, go read her stories. She's kaela097 and she writes awesome B/C fic.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"Hello?"

"It's me."

"Hey! Uh, hang-hang on, okay," Serena said before she put the phone at her side and looked at her mom. "I'll be right back. It's a girl from my English class. She needs to know what the reading assignment is for the weekend."

Lily nodded, "Strange timing but alright. Don't take too long. Dinner will be ready soon."

"I'll be fast, I promise," Serena said as she hurried down the hall to her room. She closed the door behind her and then went into her bathroom, again closing the door behind her. "Hey. Sorry about that, I was with my mom."

"It's okay. I didn't even think about the time. I should've waited until later on tonight."

"No, I'm glad you called. I wasn't sure I'd hear from you today," Serena admitted.

"I wouldn't not call today," Blair said.

"So, what are you doing today?"

"I'm helping the tea house down the street serve food to people who don't have anywhere else to go."

"B, that's really sweet."

"And it keeps me from being by myself today."

"I know of something else that would keep you from being by yourself today," Serena hinted.

"Nice attempt at a guilt trip, S," Blair said. "Really it was one of your better ones."

"I try," Serena said. "In all seriousness, I wish you were here. It'd be nice to make up for last Thanksgiving."

"Last Thanksgiving wasn't that bad," Blair said.

"I blew Nate off to help Tripp cheat on his wife."

"You wouldn't believe how drunk he and Chuck got," Blair giggled. "I had to have security pick them both up off the floor of the lobby."

Serena giggled at the imagery Blair's words created.

"Any sign of Little J?"

"No sign or word from my evil step-sister," Serena reported.

"And your step-brother?"

"The last time I saw Dan he was trying to convince Vanessa that it was a _good_ idea to come over for dinner tonight. He wasn't having much luck from what I could tell."

"Serena," Blair said warningly.

"Oh you mean Chuck?"

"Yes, I mean Chuck."

"Haven't seen him yet," Serena admitted. "If he doesn't show, Nate and I are going over to his apartment and force feed him turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and pie. We figure it'll help soak up anything and everything he's currently drinking at the moment."

"I really wish you wouldn't put images like that in my head."

"Images like what?"

"Chuck drinking alone and pathetic in the penthouse of the hotel," Blair said. "It makes me feel bad."

"Sorry. I actually didn't mean to do that this time," Serena said. "But, if you had any thoughts of maybe calling him and letting him know that you're alive and well and not lying dead in a ditch somewhere, today would be a really good day to do it."

"Why?"

"Thanksgiving is your favorite holiday. Of course Chuck is going to miss you more today than he usually does."

"Right," Blair said quietly. "Look, I need to get going. Um, happy Thanksgiving Serena."

"Happy Thanksgiving, Blair," Serena said before they hung up.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck stared at the ceiling of his bedroom. He'd dreaded this day since the beginning of November and no matter how much Lily called with one guilt trip after another he was not showing at dinner that day to break bread with Rufus, Eric, and Dan. He looked off to the side at the bottle of scotch on the bedside table. Getting drunk at the moment didn't even to appeal to him.

_Yes, but that's why I love you._

He groaned as Blair's words ran through his head. Maybe he should get drunk. It seemed to make Blair's voice disappear and leave him in peace for a few moments.

Sitting up he snatched the bottle and glass. Just as he poured himself a drink he heard Nate call out.

"Chuck, where are you?"

"God help me," Chuck mumbled. "Just please don't let him have brought-"

"Chuck," Serena's feminine voice echoed in the apartment.

"Serena," he finished with a groan

A moment later a blonde head peeked into his room and smiled, "Hey, you're here. Didn't you hear us calling?"

"I was hoping you'd go away if I didn't answer."

"No such luck," Serena smiled as she came into the room. Chuck noticed she was carrying bags.

"Do some shopping on your way over?"

"No. We brought leftovers," Serena said. "Nate's looking for whipped cream."

"I don't think we have any," Chuck said looking grumpily at her. "How was dinner?"

"Fine. Rufus was distant and aloof. Dan wouldn't stop staring at the door. Eric barely ate anything. Our mother tried to keep the conversation going without success for most of the meal. Oh, and did I mention? The only people who actually ate anything were me and Nate. So it was a banner holiday for our extended family."

"Thanks for the recap," Chuck responded sarcastically as he took a healthy drink from his glass.

"No problem," Serena said in a matching tone. "Mom really missed you."

"Don't Serena," Chuck warned.

"So, what number is that? Can't be too high since the bottle's still pretty full, unless this is bottle number two."

"It's my first one."

"Really? I'm surprised," Serena said as she took out some plates and containers. "I thought you'd be halfway to blitzed by now."

"Is that what the food is for? Neutralize the booze?"

"Yes," Nate said as he came in. "No whipped cream but I found some chocolate syrup."

"Chocolate syrup on apple pie," Serena raised an eyebrow. "That's kind of gross."

"Chocolate goes with everything," Nate stated defensively. "Went well on you."

"Too much detail," Chuck groaned.

"Oh you're one to talk," Serena said. "Do you know how many times we heard you and B- Never mind." She suddenly found the turkey on her plate fascinating.

Chuck stared at the liquid in his glass, "Last year at this time you and I were getting drunk, you remember?"

Nate smiled, "I remember Blair having security pick us up off the floor of the lobby."

"If you're being here is to cheer me up, could you please dispense with using the B word?"

"We're not here to cheer you up," Serena said.

"We're not," Nate looked at Serena in surprise.

"We're here to make sure you don't die of alcohol poisoning."

"How charitable of you," he mumbled.

"Tis the season," Nate chimed in.

"Besides, you shouldn't be alone on the holiday that the B word loves the most," Serena said. "You know that no matter how mad or how hurt she is, she wouldn't want that for you."

"I'd beg to differ," he replied, "She left me alone, remember?"

"I remember why she left you alone," Serena scowled in response. "I also remember that if I hadn't opened my mouth you'd be somewhere in Europe with some blonde."

"Serena, calm down," Nate said. "We're not here to fight."

"It's the holidays Nathaniel," Chuck said. "Fights are par for the course."

"No wonder she fled to Jersey," Serena mumbles under her breath.

"She fled where?" Chuck scowls at her as he easily translated her words.

"What," Serena looked up.

"You just said she fled somewhere," Chuck looked at her.

"I said I wanna be fed. Nate, feed me."

Nate looks at her in bewilderment as she opened her mouth to him. "You wanna what?"

"You two make me sick," Chuck growls.

"Suck it up. We're not leaving and I'm not going to stop being sappy," Serena said.

He quickly polishes off his first glass and pours himself another. He'd need massive amounts of alcohol to survive through this visit if it lasted much longer.

"Thanks," Serena snatched the glass from him involuntarily reminding him of the night she'd taken his glass from him the night after he'd tried to ruin Blair's relationship with Lord Marcus.

"Give that back," he ordered.

"Nope. Drinking is not going to solve your problems," Serena said as she took a sip and made a face. "Ugh. How can you drink scotch?" She passed the glass to Nate.

"Hand it over, Nate," Chuck put out his hand.

"Sorry man, I'm with her. Drinking is not going to solve anything."

"Then enlighten me as to how I'm supposed to solve this," he hissed, "Blair's run off with my child. I can't track her down despite my unlimited resources. What else is there to do but to get drunk past oblivion?"

"Do. Not. Give. Up," Serena demanded.

"Believe that she'll come back," Nate added. "She can't stay gone forever."

"She's gone. She's made it painfully clear that she wants nothing to do with me and can you blame her?"

"No, but you do," Serena said, tilting her head and looking at him. "You blame her for running away even though you did it first."

"That's bull," Chuck hissed.

"No it isn't," Serena shook her head. "She found out you slept with Jenny and she walked away. But you ran away from it all to Prague and managed to get yourself shot. I find you on accident and you're all ready to skip town with your latest conquest until I open my mouth and tell you that Blair's pregnant. Only then do you decide to be man enough to face your problems and come home. But it's too late. She's gone. Now all you can do is feel sorry for yourself."

"Is this your idea of a pep talk? If it is, stay away from the crisis hotlines because you suck at it," Chuck snarled.

"Chuck, you can't just stop living because you miss Blair," Nate said.

"It's more than missing her. It's worry. She's going to be giving birth in another couple of months. What if something goes wrong and we miss our chance to fix things?"

Serena fell silent as the guilt crept in. She'd swore to keep her best friend's secret, but she could see how the entire situation was eating Chuck alive.


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you to my amazing fans. Keep the replies coming. Thank you to my awesome Beta. You have no idea how much your help means.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair smiled as she hung another ornament. As she hung the next ornament, her smile grew as it was a blue ball with the name Sebastian on it. It hung next to a pink ornament with Sabrina on it. Next year at this time, she'd have two little almost one year olds to contend with as she decorated the tree.

Life wouldn't be boring, she mused hanging a purple one that said Eleanor on it in elegant script. She sighed, hoping her mother was having a good holiday wherever she was.

She checked her watch and she noted that as it was currently one in the afternoon which meant it was seven in the evening in Paris. She imagined that her mother and Cyrus were having dinner in their home in the city and her father and Roman were probably decorating their own tree at the chateau.

She ran a hand over her stomach absently, knowing that her father would make a wonderful grandfather and Roman an amazing 'uncle'. Shaking the thought and the tears away she turned to pick up the next ornament, a deep red one with Chuck's name on it, when a sharp pain struck her.

"Ooh," she gasped. On her last visit her doctor had said that twins were often up to a month or so early but she didn't expect Blair to go into labor before the New Year.

Apparently doctors didn't know everything, she thought as she stared at the puddle that had formed at her feet as her water broke unexpectedly.

"Okay. Ambulance," she murmured picking up the phone. "Children for Christmas. You two have impeccable timing. You must get that from your father."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Serena answered her ringing cell with an upbeat "Hello?"

"It's me. It's time. Hospital," Blair said between panting in the back of the ambulance.

"Now," Serena exclaimed in surprise. Blair had told her that she wouldn't be on call before the New Year.

"Now," Blair confirmed as her breathing began to labor as she felt another contraction building.

"I'm on my way," Serena said as she got off of her bed where she'd been watching 'A Christmas Story'. "Don't you dare have them until I get there."

"I'll do my best," Blair said sarcastically through each breath she took. "It's Morristown Memorial."

"I remember. I'll be there soon," she said before they hung up. Serena went to her closet and pulled out a bag of gifts she'd bought on the sly over the last few months. She grabbed her purse and then she stuck her head out of her door, listened and then crept her way out of the penthouse and headed for New Jersey.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"Oh my God. He is so perfect, I can't stand it," Serena said from the end of Blair's bed where she was staring at Sebastian Nathaniel at just after two am on Christmas day. She could see Chuck in each and every feature of the little boy lying before her.

"And his sister?"

"Sabrina Rose is going to turn as many heads as her mother did when she was growing up," Serena predicted as she looked at the little girl who was a miniature version of her best friend.

"Thanks, Serena," Blair smiled.

"How do you feel," Serena asked, coming to stand next to her.

"Tired," Blair yawned. "Are they really okay?"

"They are perfect," Serena assured her. "You did so great, Blair."

"I feel like I was hit by a truck."

"But you did it well," Serena said.

"Thanks. I have some stuff for you," Blair said as she sat up slowly. "It's over in the corner with my bag."

"You mean your suitcase," Serena teased.

"I had a lot to bring with me. It's the shopping bag behind it."

Serena picked up a white bag and peeked inside, "What is all this?"

"Presents from the children and me to thank you for being there for us."

"Blair, you didn't have to do this."

"Yes, I did," Blair nodded. She shot a look at the clock on the wall, "You should get going. If you leave now, you'll make it home in time to get some sleep before you have to wake up to open presents."

"I don't want to leave you by yourself."

"I am hardly by myself," Blair pointed to the end of her bed to her children's bassinets.

"You know what I mean," Serena frowned at her.

"You need to get home and be with your family."

"You're my family too," Serena told her.

"And you're mine," Blair assured her. "But you have to go home and be with your mother and brother and everyone else so that they don't get suspicious."

Serena nodded and then gave Blair a tight hug, "Call me if you want me to come back and there's a bag of gifts in the closet for you guys."

"Serena, the bag has some things for Dorota, Vanya, and Ana. I know it's a lot to ask but-"

"I'll think of something," Serena promised.

"There's something in there for Chuck too. I saw it and I couldn't make myself leave the store without it."

"I know how that goes. He may not be all that happy with her right now, but I know Dan bought Jenny a present," Serena said. "I'll make sure Chuck gets it somehow."

"Thanks, S."

"Merry Christmas, B."

"Merry Christmas."

=x=x=x=x=x=x=

Serena poked her head into the penthouse and listened.

All quiet.

She said a silent thank you and started her walk down the hall to her room. It had taken her forever to get back into the city. Who knew there would be so much traffic from Jersey to Manhattan between 2 and 5am Christmas morning?

"Serena?"

"Mom," she turned around. "You're up early."

"I was just putting out a few more gifts. Are you just getting in?"

Glad she'd had the forethought to change into something red and sparkly before starting her trek home, she started to give Lily the story she'd come up with, "Yes, but it's not what you think. A girl in my English class called about a last minute party. I did go to it, but I didn't stay long because about halfway through my second drink I realized most of my presents for you guys were still sitting in Blair's room unwrapped. So I had to go over there and wrap them. By the time I was done it was about 2 am so I just went to sleep after I set my phone alarm to wake me at 4:30. Then I packed everything up and came home. I don't think Dorota even knew I was there. At least I hope she didn't. I hope she spent a nice night with Vanya and the baby."

Lily gave her daughter an appraising look before she smiled, "I'm sure she did. Why don't you go get some more sleep? Eric won't be awake for a few more hours."

"Good idea. See you later, Mom."

"Night Sweetheart."

-x-x-x-x-x-

"You're pretty quiet today," Dan handed Serena a Shirley Temple which earned him a raised eyebrow. "Don't look at me like that. You look like you need the sugar. You've been yawning for half an hour. If I gave you alcohol you'd be asleep before you finished your first sip."

"So, I'm being too quiet, and I look tired. You always did know how to turn a girl's head, Dan," Serena grinned as she rolled her eyes.

"And then there are the few moments that I catch a Cheshire smile on your face. That's when I know who you're thinking about."

"She's my best friend, and she's about to become a mom. That makes me a little happy even though I'd be happier if I knew where she was. Can you blame me?"

"No, I can't."

"Speaking of best friends who are about to become moms, are we going to see Vanessa today?"

"I don't think so," he shook his head.

"Does she still think you and I are going to end up together?"

"I don't know if it's that or if she's just looking for a reason to not make a commitment to me or a life that includes me."

"I'm sorry Dan," Serena frowned sympathetically at him.

"Thanks. So, what about you and Nate?"

"What about me and Nate?"

"Nothing's changed?"

"No. He's still got a girlfriend that he's not willing to break up with at the moment."

"He's a fool then," Dan told her.

"Thank you," Serena smiled before she looked across the room to see Chuck enter. "Excuse me Dan."

"Sure."

Serena headed across the room and reached Chuck just as Lily did.

"I'm so glad you made it," Lily said, giving him a hug.

"I had a feeling if I didn't come, you'd send a mass of mercenaries to collect me."

"You know me well," Lily smiled.

"Merry Christmas, Chuck," Serena gave him a hug. "You almost missed cocktail hour."

"Sorry. Traffic was miserable," Chuck said as he handed a bag to Lily and his jacket to a maid. Lily smiled her thanks and walked over to the tree to put down the gifts she'd been handed.

"Still? I would've thought it would've cleared up a little since this morning. I wonder if Penn Station is still a zoo."

"How would you know what Penn Station is like?"

"What?"

"You just said you wondered if Penn Station was still a zoo. How would you know what it was like in the first place?"

"Radio. I was listening to the radio and it was saying how crazy things were out there." Serena quickly downed her drink and excused herself, "I need something a little stronger to drink."

Chuck watched his sister walk away. He'd known her long enough to know when something was going with her and for some reason he had a feeling that the something had to do with Blair.

He quietly left the room and called his PI.

"It's me. I want all of Serena van der Woodsen's phone records for the last three months as soon as possible." He hung up the phone and we back into the party.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Serena walked down the hall with a small smile on her face two days before the new year. She'd just gotten back from dinner with her family. New Year's was coming up and everyone around her seemed to be looking forward instead of back, which promised to make it a good party for tomorrow night.

She entered her room and put down her purse before flipping on the light. Turning around she gasped.

"Chuck? What the hell are you doing in my room, and why are you sitting in the dark?" Chuck just looked at her. "What's wrong?"

"Where is she?"

"She who," Serena asked. "Mom's down the hall."

"Blair," he hissed through his teeth

"How would I know," Serena said trying not to let the panic that was starting to race through her veins show in her voice.

"I know you better than Lily does. I know when you're lying. Tell me where she is now," he demanded as he stood up to be face to face with her. "I need to get to her before she has our child. I need to set things right."

Serena fumbles for a response only to be cut off again by Chuck.

"They're my family. The only one I'll ever have a chance to have. Please tell me."

"I will tell you that she's okay. She's healthy. But if I tell you where she is, neither of us will _ever_ see her again."

"That's not enough," Chuck growled. "Please, Serena, I'm losing my mind here."

"No," Serena shook her head. "I opened my mouth once about this and I shouldn't have. I should've just kept Blair's secret and left you to go off with whatever her name was. I am not going to do it again. Blair's forgiven me for a lot over the years. She wouldn't forgive me for this and I refuse to let a guy be the reason I lose her."

"We won't lose her," he tried to assure her. "I promise you that I will do whatever it takes to keep her in our lives. I love her, Serena, her and our unborn child conceived out of our love for each other. Let me fix this . . . please."

Serena let out a sigh through her teeth. "They were born on Christmas."

"They," he repeated in bewilderment. "Twins?"

Serena reached for her purse and pulled out a photo from the side pocket. She handed it to him, "Sabrina Rose was born at 12:15am and Sebastian Nathaniel followed five minutes later."

Chuck's eyes welled with tears as he looked at the tiny little lives he was responsible for creating, "Please, Serena, tell me where they are."

"I can't. I'm sorry," Serena responded tearfully.

"Why?"

"Because I can't, I _won't_ take the risk of losing her, even for you."

"But you're willing to let me lose her and our children."

"She named your son Sebastian because the way you two used to scheme always reminded her of Cruel Intentions. I think Nathaniel is pretty self explanatory but I'll tell you anyway. It's because at the end of the day, all the girls and all the booze and all the drugs don't matter, because you will always be there for him and he will always be there for you."

"As you are for Blair and her for you," Chuck realized.

"Exactly. You keep that," she nodded at the picture in his hand. "I won't stop you from trying to find her on your own. Just leave me out of it."


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you for all the replies. For all those of you who have put me on aunthor alerts and story alerts I'd appreciate your feedback. Thank you to my awesome Beta. In case I haven't told you guys, go read her stories. kaela097

Chapter 7

"So, how's business," Serena asked her best friend as Blair found a few quiet moments to have a conversation. Between running her very own café and tending to two infants, these moments were rare.

"Not bad and I'm actually getting pretty good at cooking. Who knew?"

Serena smiled, "You've always been good at whatever you set your mind to and you know it."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence. How was your New Year's?"

"Good. Dan, Eric, and I had dinner with the parents before we went out for a while. Dan wasn't in the best of moods. Vanessa hasn't returned his phone calls in about a week."

"What is her damn problem? She couldn't find a more responsible guy than Humphrey," Blair said in an annoyed tone of voice.

"Oh my God. Blair, are you feeling okay?"

"Fine, why?"

"You just defended Dan," Serena told her. "Are you sure the sleep deprivation isn't having an adverse effect on you?"

"Look, I know Humphrey and I haven't ever gotten along, and I will never forgive his sister for a lot of things, but Vanessa has a guy she can count on and she's throwing him away. She's being stupid."

"I happen to agree with you," Serena said.

_Ring-ring_

"Oh Blair, let me call you back. The house line's ringing and nobody's home but me."

"Okay. But don't call until tomorrow. I've recently discovered that Sabrina is possibly the world's lightest sleeper, even more so than Chuck was. I have to turn off the ringers on the phones and put my cell on vibrate or her little lungs get quite a workout."

"Okay. I'll call you around four. Bye B," Serena said as she hung up. Then she picked up the house line. "Hello?"

"Lily?"

"No, this is Serena. Who's this?"

"This is Allison. I'm-"

"Dan's mom," Serena finished. "I remember. Rufus and Dan aren't here. I think Rufus is at the gallery, and I don't know where Dan is."

"I really need to," Allison broke off in a sob.

"Allison, are you alright," Serena asked in alarm.

"It's Jenny," Allison explained tearfully.

"What about her," she hadn't actually cared, but the woman's tone had her curious.

"There was an explosion and she-she," Allison started to sob hysterically.

"_Hello, anyone home,"_ Lily's voice called out.

"Mom! Mom, get in here," Serena called, her voice nearing a hysterical level herself as the word 'explosion' sunk into her skull.

Lily's heels click-clacked rapidly down the hall, "Serena? What is it?" She arrived in her daughter's room and looked around. "Okay, you're alright. So, what's going-"

"Allison's on the phone. Something's wrong with Jenny," Serena held out the phone to her mom.

Lily took the phone and put it to her ear, "Allison? What's wrong? Dear, I can't understand you. You have to calm down."

"I'm calling the gallery," Serena said picking up her cell phone and dialing.

Rufus picked up on the second ring, "Hello?"

"Rufus, it's Serena. You need to come home. Allison's on the phone and something's wrong with Jenny. Mom's trying to calm her down but she's not having a lot of luck."

"I'll be home as soon as I can. I'm alone at the gallery right now. It could be awhile before I can get away," Rufus told her. After the shenanigans from a few months ago, he was done catering to his reckless daughter's mood swings.

"Rufus, close the gallery and come home now. Allison's hysterical and before she broke down she said the words Jenny and explosion in the same sentence."

"I'm on my way," Rufus responded a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach started to take hold. There could be something seriously wrong with his little girl.

"Okay. I'm gonna try and find Dan," she told her stepfather.

"Thank you," he said.

-x-x-x-x-

"Hello?"

"Nate, it's me. Is Dan with you?"

Nate raised an eyebrow at Serena's blunt question, "Uh yeah."

"Well, then why the hell isn't he picking up his cell phone?"

"Jenny had tried to get in touch with him a few hours ago, and he wanted to avoid her calls. He put his phone to silent."

Serena sighed, "That might actually have been Allison. Look, just put him on, okay?"

"Sure," Nate said. He held out his phone to Dan. "It's Serena for you. She sounds upset."

"What's up, Serena," Dan inquired after he snatched the phone from Nate

"Come home," she ordered. "I can't explain this to you over the phone. And you need to grab Eric from school. He stayed late for a science project."

"Sure, I'm on my way. Are you alright," Dan inquired.

"I'm fine. You just need to come home, Dan."

"Okay, I'm walking out the door," Dan assured her as he hung up. He threw the phone back to Nate as he snatched his schoolbag.

"What's going on," Nate asked.

"I don't know but it sounds bad. Serena wants me to grab Eric before I go home. Talk to you later, man," Dan said as he nearly ran into Chuck who was stepping out of the elevator. "Chuck," he acknowledged with a polite nod.

"Humphrey," Chuck said as they passed each other. "Something I said?"

"Something Serena said," Nate said as the elevator doors closed.

"An update on Blair?"

"I don't think she'd be calling Dan home if it was Blair," Nate said. "So I take it you haven't had any luck?"

"Do you have any idea how many towns, cities, and outlying areas there are in New Jersey?"

"Quite a few, I gather," Nate responded.

"That state is a mess. There's a town in Central Jersey that's actually surrounded by another. She picked the perfect spot to disappear. I can't get one whiff of her delectable perfume."

"You want me to take another run at Serena," Nate inquired. He had the feeling that Serena knew more than she was letting on. He'd confronted her once with no results, but he'd take another crack at her if Chuck asked.

"No. Thanks but I know you want her back and this might screw that up."

"Why would you say something like that? I'm with someone else. Serena is the furthest thing from my mind."

"You're still the worst liar in the world," Chuck shook his head as he went to the bar to pour himself a drink to dull the ache in his heart.

"No, it's called loyalty," Nate said. "End of the day, remember?"

"You're loyal to me over her," Chuck sighed as he finished Nate's thought.

"Always," Nate nodded. "No matter how badly we both screw up our relationships with women."

"We both are atrocious when it comes to women," Chuck snorted.

Nate laughed and then grabbed the remote and turned the TV on. He landed on CNN and was about to change it when he noticed what was on the screen, "Oh my God."

"What?"

"That's Hudson," Nate said.

"Little J's Hudson," Chuck inquired with a lifted eyebrow.

"Shit," Nate murmured lowly before grabbing his phone and dialing Serena.

"Hello," there were tears in Serena's voice.

"What's going on Serena? It's all over the news. There was an explosion in Hudson. Is there something wrong with Jenny?"

"Just tell me Dan hasn't seen it because Rufus doesn't want him finding out before he has the chance to tell him."

"Find out what?" Nate pressed. "Serena, tell me what's going on?"

"Jenny's brain dead," Serena told him. "Allison is a mess. She wants Dan and Rufus to come up. We're all going."

"Brain dead," Nate repeated, "What does that mean, Serena?"

Chuck looked up at Nate's words. His friend was usually clueless, but surely even he knew what the phrase meant.

"It means we're going to say good-bye."

"She's dead," Nate choked out.

"Technically, no. She's being kept alive by machines until the doctor turns them off," Serena told him.

"I'm coming with you," he informed her.

"You don't have to," Serena stuttered out.

"I'm on my way," he told her again as he stood up. "You guys need someone who isn't family to be there with you to make sure you sleep and eat."

"Thank you," Serena responded just before a sob broke out.

"I'll be there soon," Nate said before they hung up. "Can I-"

"It's downstairs waiting for you," Chuck told him. He'd already called for the limo to be waiting outside in anticipation of Nate needing to use it. "Tell Lily if she needs anything to let me know."

"Jenny's dying," Nate responded numbly as Chuck walked him to the elevator.

"I know Man," Chuck said as he hit the call button. "You gonna be able to walk to the limo or should I go down with you?"

"I'll be okay. Oh. Dan said he brought you something. Serena gave it to him to give to you."

"If you or Serena need anything, let me know," Chuck told him as the elevator doors opened.

Nate nodded numbly as he walked into the elevator and pressed the button for the lobby.

Chuck sighed as the doors closed, and he went into his bedroom. A brightly wrapped present sat on his bed.

Chuck carefully unwrapped the box and opened it slowly. Inside lay a mask that is half devil-half angel. A note rested under it.

_A reminder that while you show the devil to most people, I count myself among the few that know that you have an angelic side and while I may be mad, I'll never forget that fact._

Chuck's hands shook slightly as he read the handwritten words. He felt tears forming. It was a gift from Blair. He felt a sense of hope he hadn't in a long time. She still saw the angel in him when all he felt was demonic.

He still had a chance.

0x0x0x0

Serena was sitting on the couch with Eric while her mom packed and Rufus was talking to Dan.

"Serena, what's going on," Eric asked anxiously.

"Are you sure you want me to tell you? Because once I do, there's no going back."

"Yes, I absolutely need to know. What is Rufus telling Dan?"

"It's Jenny," she began. "There was an explosion in Hudson today."

"Is she okay? Was she nearby?"

"Eric," Serena shook her head. "Maybe Mom should tell you."

"Serena," Eric looked horrified. "She's not, is she?"

"Yes," Serena nodded as tears engulfed her again.

"Oh my God," Eric gasped. He threw his arms around his sister who immediately returned the embrace. They both looked up when they heard a loud wail from down the hall.

Serena hugged Eric tighter. Her gratefulness of her brother being safe and sound took on a whole new meaning at the moment.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Serena walked the hall again of the hospital where Jenny had been taken after the explosion. Eric was sitting with Dan down the hall and Nate had gone for coffee. Her mom and Rufus were with Allison and the doctor talking about options. Apparently some of Jenny's organs were still viable. She looked at her watch. It was four in the morning. She debated and then pulled her cell phone out. She dialed a familiar number and waited.

"Hey, it's me. I know you're probably sleeping right now but I just need to talk and just get everything out to someone who doesn't have anything to say. Right now, that's your voice mail. I guess I should start with why I'm calling. Jenny's dead. She got into environmental protesting and today there was an explosion and she's gone. Right now she's being kept alive by machines but she's gone," Serena said her voice choked by tears.

"I can't get over the guilt that I feel. If I hadn't set her up, she wouldn't have been sent back to Hudson and she wouldn't have been at the protest.

"Nate told me it's not my fault. That everyone needed to know what she did. Maybe he's right but I could've done it in a better way. I didn't have to expose her the way I did.

"I really need to talk to you, so please call me back when you get this message. I love you, B. I miss you," Serena finished before she hung up.

"Serena," Nate's voice came from behind her.

"How long have you been standing there," she jumped as the familiar voice rung in her ears. His voice sounded angry.

"Long enough," Nate responded, "Does Chuck know you're in communication with Blair?

"Yes," Serena nodded. "And don't pretend he didn't tell you. You're a lot of things Nate. Subtle isn't one of them. Your friendly conversation the other day was anything but."

"Chuck never told me," Nate responded honestly. His surprise was genuine. He truly had no idea.

He couldn't believe Chuck kept this from him.

"I thought you would've been the first one Chuck told. I was surprised you two didn't double team me when he confronted me."

"And we would have if I'd known," Nate responded, "I can't believe you've been in contact with her this entire time. How has Chuck not forced her location out of you? Come on, Serena, this is Blair and his child we're talking about. Even you could not be cruel enough to keep a father away from his child, not with your daddy issues."

"I haven't known the whole time. She called me around the middle of October. He didn't find out until right after Christmas. He tried to get her location out of me but after everything Blair and I have been through I refuse to let my telling Chuck where she is be the reason I lose her and don't you throw my daddy issues around so lightly Nate. You have some daddy and grand-daddy issues that I could get into."

"She's got to be giving birth at any time. Chuck deserves the right to be there," Nate stated. "And let's keep things civil."

"She already gave birth. Do we have to talk about this now?"

"Does Chuck know he's a father," Nate continued to pepper her with questions.

"Yes, I told him. He has a picture of them," Serena said.

"Them?"

"Oh me and my stupid mouth," Serena groaned as she sat down. "Why can't I ever just shut up?"

"Them," Nate repeated as he waited for clarification.

"Twins," Serena admitted. "A boy and a girl."

"Oh my god," Nate stated as he quickly planted himself in the seat next to her. He felt himself faint at the revelation.

"I am not saying another word. I've said way too much already."

"At least give me their names," Nate tried to pry the last bit of information out of her.

"Sabrina Rose and Sebastian Nathaniel."

"Sabrina?"

"You know our girl and Audrey."

"Sebastian," he added in bewilderment. He could recall no Hepburn movie with a Sebastian as a main character.

"Cruel Intentions," Serena smiled. "Do you know anyone better suited to be a real life version of Kathryn and Sebastian than Blair and Chuck?"

"Blair as Kathryn? She's not nearly that heartless."

"True. But Chuck as Sebastian? One girl brings down all of his walls in one fell swoop," Serena smiled. "Sound familiar?"

"I suppose you have a point," Nate conceded.

Serena smiled and then looked down the hall. "We should get back."

"Yeah I guess we should."

They started to walk down the hall when Serena turned to Nate, "Georgina. She'd make a great Kathryn."

-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair put her cell phone down numbly. She couldn't believe it.

She hated Little J more than anyone else in the world, but she'd never wish this on anyone.

She let out a shaky sigh and stared down at her sleeping babies. She wanted to tear her hair out and sob at the thought of being in Allison and Rufus' position at the moment.

"Life changes when you have children," she spoke softly as she bent down and kissed each child's forehead lightly.

She picked up her phone again and hit the speed dial for her best friend.

"Hello," Serena's voice was laced with sleep.

"Sorry, did I wake you?"

"No, don't worry about it. I told you to call me as soon as you got the message," Serena stated sleepily.

"Where are you?"

"On the train heading home. Eric's with me," Serena said. "But he's knocked out."

"How are Rufus and Humphrey handling everything?" Blair inquired as she pushed a tear out of her eyes.

"They're not so great," Serena admitted. "We wanted to stay but Mom sent us home to start working on a reception so we'd feel useful. Nate's with us too. But he's looking for food."

"I just cannot believe any of this," Blair responded, "I'm numb."

"You're not the only one. Dan hasn't said anything other than yes or no since he found out."

"What can I do for you? What do you need from me?"

"You're doing it," Serena assured her friend. "Just by being there and listening when I need you to, you're doing more than you know. I know it can't be easy for you to hear this stuff especially since you're a mom, too."

"It's every parent's worst nightmare," Blair agreed.

"Dan and Rufus are really beating themselves up over the last conversation they had with Jenny," Serena said. "Rufus especially thinks that if he hadn't told Allison what Jenny had done, she might not have been in Hudson at that point in time."

"Everyone is going to beat themselves up, but it's not going to change what's happen."

Serena nodded, "I know. Get my mind off of this. Tell me about my adorable niece and nephew."

Blair smiled, "After hearing about Jenny, I want to lock them up in a bubble so that they never get hurt or feel pain. But on the happier side they are so adorable. They have everyone that comes into the café wrapped around their tiny little fingers. Sabrina coos on command. Sebastian blows these cute little bubbles."

Serena had to smile, "Gorgeous and manipulative parents. I think that's it."

"Very funny. I happen to think it's just because they're adorable. I took them to the pediatrician yesterday. They're already in the top one percentile for development for infants in their age range."

"So they're brilliant and they're beautiful? They take after their mom," Serena teased.

"And their father," Blair added with a slight bit of hesitation.

"I'm glad you said it, so I didn't have to," Serena said. "Blair, can you just-"

"No," she said immediately. "I can't call him. I pick up the phone nearly every day, but something is stopping me. I don't want to get hurt by him again. My heart can't take it."

"Right," Serena said. "Look, I better go. I can see Nate coming back."

"Call me soon when you get a few minutes alone and we can talk more if you need it," Blair offered.

"I will. Bye, B."

"Bye, S."


	8. Chapter 8

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. I hope all of those celebrating the holiday are having good ones. Enjoy your day and this chapter. Thanks to my beta. Thanks to all of you who replied. I encourage everyone to do so.

x0x0x0x0x0x0

"Hello, Serena," Chuck said as he walked into his step-sister's room carrying a box.

"Ever heard of knocking," Serena looked annoyed as she made sure her robe was closed tight from his eyes.

"Yes, but there's the chance you wouldn't let me in and I need to talk to you."

"What about?"

"I have a favor to ask."

"Should I be afraid," she asked nervously.

"No," Chuck handed over the box. "I need you to send this to Blair. I want it to get there by Monday."

"It's a Valentine's Day present," Serena guessed as she took the box into her hands.

"Yes. Don't worry, there are no tracking devices attached."

"Promise," she eyed him skeptically.

"Yes," Chuck nodded with a slight chuckle.

"Okay. I'll make sure she gets it," Serena agreed.

"Thank you," Chuck said. "So, any big plans?"

"Well my back-up date currently has a boyfriend of his own, so I'm planless."

"You usually go out with Eric when you don't have a date on Valentine's Day?"

"Yes," Serena said defensively. "But since that's out of the question, I'll probably watch some corny movie. You doing anything?" Serena winced. "Sorry. Stupid question. Ignore me."

"I haven't been able to ignore you since we were six, Serena. Believe me, I've tried. But since my current choice of a Valentine is ignoring the fact that I exist, I'll probably be getting hammered on Monday night."

"Want some company?"

"Trading one brother for another?"

"Why not," Serena said with a shrug.

"Thanks, but I think if I spent Valentine's Day with you, Nate might kill me."

"Nate? Isn't he spending the night with his girlfriend?"

"You haven't heard? His girlfriend wasn't too happy when Nathaniel broke a bunch of dates with her to spend time with you, Eric, and Humphrey when Jenny died. They broke up last week."

"Ouch," Serena said. "Poor Nate. Well, then why don't all three of us do something? We had fun on Thanksgiving."

"You had fun on Thanksgiving. I spent the whole night trying to wrestle my alcohol back from you two."

"I promise to let you drink this time," Serena smiled. "In fact, I'll probably join you."

"What's the matter, Sis? Feeling a little lonely," Chuck asked with a smirk.

"Go away, I have to get dressed," Serena frowned at him. Seeing he was about to speak again, she pointed a finger, "One more word and B's present goes into the incinerator."

Chuck put his hands up, "Call me later about Monday." Then he left.

Serena waited until she heard the elevator ding and the doors close before she picked up her phone. Before she dialed she took one more precaution and shut and locked her door before she went into her bathroom.

"Thayer's Café," Blair's voice came over the phone after Serena had dialed the number.

"Hey, it's me. I know you're probably busy but can we meet on Sunday?"

"Yeah. Everything okay?"

"I have something I need to give you," Serena told her. "Besides I want to see my niece and nephew."

"And they will love seeing you," Blair smiled. "How about we meet at that restaurant near the station?"

"Twelve?"

"I will be there."

"Me too," Serena said. "Bye B."

"Bye S."

-x-x-x-x-

Chuck sat on his sofa looking over a bunch of papers that Lily had given him about Bass Industries in an attempt to get him interested in something besides his quest to locate Blair. He looked up when he heard the elevator doors open.

"You," Eleanor said in a stony voice. "What are you doing to find my daughter?"

"Eleanor," Chuck gasped in surprise.

"It's been months Charles. She's probably already had the baby. We don't know where she is. Even Harold hasn't heard from her."

"I assure you, I'm doing absolutely everything that I can to find her," Chuck responded defensively. "I've narrowed down the search to New Jersey."

"What the hell is my daughter doing in New Jersey? And what do you mean narrowed it down? New Jersey isn't that big Charles. You should be able to find one girl in a state that size."

"It's not as easy as it sounds," Chuck grumbled, "I have my men searching everywhere. She'll turn up."

"Charles, she has your child. She is my child. You know what I'm feeling right now. It's terror every time the phone rings. It's panic when you see a news report about an unidentified female found in an alley."

"Serena assures me she's in a safe area." Chuck replies.

"Serena? What does Serena have to do with anything," Eleanor asked sharply.

"Blair has been in contact with Serena, but there are conditions. Blair has threatened to cut off all communication if Serena reveals her whereabouts to me."

"She calls Serena but she doesn't call her own mother," Eleanor said as she sat down on the couch. Tears stung her eyes at the revelation. They'd never had the closest of relationships, but she thought she'd at least hear from her when her grandchild was born. Surely she deserved that courtesy.

"I'm sure it's nothing personal," Chuck tried to offer her comfort. "She probably figured you were in Paris, and she wanted news of New York."

"How would feel if your son or daughter chose a friend to stay in touch with instead of you?"

"I'm sure it is the most horrible feeling imaginable. I only hope that when the time comes, Sebastian and Sabrina feel they can come to either Blair or I," Chuck responded as his eyes drifted to the picture he had of his children that Serena gave him that he found time to frame.

"Twins," Eleanor said softly. "Blair's great-grandmother was a twin. Their names were Isabel and Stephen."

"Twins," Chuck nodded as he reached for the platinum frame to show her. "Sebastian is on the left and Sabrina on the right."

Eleanor held the frame, "He looks like you. I remember you as a baby Charles. You looked so much like Evelyn." She looked at him now. "You still do."

Chuck smiled slightly. Eleanor saw the exhaustion in his eyes and for the first time in months, she felt compassion for him.

"Charles, are you sleeping," Eleanor asked him.

"Not much," he sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. "I hear their cries in my sleep."

Eleanor covered his hand with hers, "They're okay and alive. Serena would've told us if something had happened. I know what your fears must've been when Blair was pregnant. I knew your mother and she was in poor health even before she was pregnant. But she so wanted a baby."

"So Lily told me," Chuck replied, "And every day while Blair was pregnant was torture, but this is so much worse. I have these two beautiful babies out there that I helped create, but I cannot be there for them. I swore to myself that if I was ever fortunate enough to be a father that I would be for my child what my father wasn't for me, but," he choked up and couldn't get anything else out.

"I don't think I ever knew a man more in love with his wife than Bart was with Evelyn," Eleanor admitted as she carefully put the photo down and covered both of his hands with hers. "A good part of him died when she did and unfortunately you paid the price for it. But what's happening now isn't your fault."

"It's completely my fault," he barked. "I traded Blair to my fucking uncle for this hotel. Then I slept with Jenny Humphrey when Blair was on her way to find me so we could get back together."

"Blair didn't see a lot of good things in my marriage to her father and because of that she probably stayed with Nathaniel longer than she should have because she thought he was solid. You did some awful things, yes. But Blair's had the rug pulled out from under her so many times, that I don't know how she ever made it this far without completely breaking down."

"She's the strongest person in the world, that's how," Chuck replied, "She's raising our children on her own with little to no financial support. I don't know how she's doing it, but she is."

"She is very strong and she loves you," Eleanor said.

"I don't know if that's true anymore."

"Oh I do. My baby loves you," Eleanor said. "I don't understand it and God knows I never encouraged it, but she does. If not for the relationship between Nathaniel and her lasting so long I think you might have been the one taking her to the prom. Trust me on this Charles. She loves you."

"And I love her. I fought myself for so long. I couldn't allow myself to be vulnerable because I didn't want to feel the way I do now, but I wouldn't trade a moment of our relationship together up until it went bad even knowing how much this hurts now. I promise you, Eleanor, I will bring her home."

"Well, maybe I can help," Eleanor said. "I think it's time for me to talk to Serena."

"I don't know if that's a good idea," Chuck shook his head. "She wants to help, but she won't risk losing Blair. I can't blame her for that."

"Neither can I," Eleanor said. "But I can ask for a meeting. She's still my daughter."

"If you see Blair, please tell her I love her," Chuck requested, his eyes desperate and sincere.

Eleanor nodded, "I will." She got to her feet and headed back towards the elevator. "Good bye Charles."

"Eleanor," Chuck nodded.

-c-c-c-c-

Serena pulled her hair back into a ponytail and picked up the package Chuck had given her. She had to get going if she was going to be on time.

"Serena," Lily called. "You have a guest."

"I'll be right there," Serena called out as she picked up her coat and headed out of her room.

She walked into the living room and stopped cold, "Eleanor?"

"I'm told you know where my daughter is," Eleanor responded coldly. "I demand you take me to her right now."

"Serena, is this true," Lily gasped in surprise.

"Uh, well," Serena stammered. "I know where she isn't."

"That's not good enough, Serena," Eleanor hissed. "Take me to her. _Now!_"

"I can't," Serena said. "Look, Eleanor, I think if Blair wanted you to know where she was she would've told you. She didn't. She told me. I'm sorry but I'm not going to betray her confidence."

"She's my daughter," Eleanor spit out as the tears began to cloud her vision. "I have a right to know where she is. I have a right to see my grandchildren."

"Grandchildren," Lily gasped.

"I might actually kill Chuck this time," Serena rubbed her forehead. "Or maybe I'll just encourage Rufus to off him. No, I'll find that blonde floozy he was with when I found him in Paris who I'm sure he left high and dry and-"

"Serena," Lily said. "Would you like to explain to me what's going on?"

"When you caught me coming in on Christmas morning I wasn't coming from the Waldorf's. I was coming from Penn Station. Blair called me on Christmas Eve because she'd gone into labor with her twins, Sebastian and Sabrina. I was there for their births."

"And you didn't think to call me or Charles?"

"Blair threatened to disappear if I told Chuck anything. She has the money to do it Eleanor."

"How could she possibly?" Eleanor scoffed.

"The trust fund from you and Harold and the one from her grandmother? Yeah, they're not sitting in some Parisian bank. They're under her new identity."

"Serena, if you know where Blair is, you need to tell Eleanor. You are in way over your head here, as is Blair."

"I'm sorry Mom, but no. I'm not doing that to Blair."

"Serena Cecilia," Lily started.

"Do you know how much crap Blair has forgiven me for over the years? I slept with Nate before I ran off to boarding school Mom! Blair had and still has every right to hate my guts. But she trusted me enough to call and tell me where she is. I'm not betraying that." She looked at Eleanor, "I will pass along your message that you want to see her and I'll let her make the decision. I'll let you know her response."

"I suppose that's the best I'm going to get."

Serena nodded, "Yes it is."

-x-x-x-x-

"Hey sorry I'm late," Serena sat down. "I missed the train I wanted and had to take the next one."

"It's okay," Blair responded. "Sebastian and Sabrina occupied themselves by people watching. They are the most curious little creatures you will ever meet." She reached out to tickle their chins which caused each to giggle bringing bright smiles to each woman's face.

"So, what's up," Blair asked of Serena.

"I have a delivery for you," Serena pushed the package she took out of her purse across the table to her friend. "Happy Valentine's Day from Chuck."

"What is it? A tracking device," Blair inquired as she stared at the beautifully wrapped box.

"He swears it's not," Serena said. "I'm actually dying to know what's inside. I know Valentine's Day isn't until tomorrow but can you open it now?"

Blair took the package and shook it slightly. The curiosity was too much. She had to open it. Tearing away the paper and putting it aside she lifted the lid off the box and gasped.

"Blair? What is it?"

She turned the box towards Serena.

"It's beautiful," Serena said. "But a butterfly mask? I don't get it."

"At the masked ball junior year he said he wouldn't need clues to find me and on my 17th birthday he said being around me gave him butterflies."

"That's pretty thoughtful for Chuck," Serena replied. "Romantic even."

"I gave him a mask for Christmas. It was half angel and half devil."

"You're the angel and he's the devil," Serena guessed.

"No. It was a reminder that while he shows his devilish side to most, he did have an angelic side and that I counted myself lucky to be one of the few who knew it and that as mad as I was I'd never forget it."

"There's a note," Serena handed her the piece of paper behind the mask.

Blair opened it.

_I still wouldn't need clues to find you and you still give me butterflies. I'll never stop looking._

_All my love,_

_Chuck_

Blair teared as she folded the note and slipped it into her purse. His words were too personal to share, even with Serena.

"You're mother is in town," Serena stated tentatively.

"I wondered how long it would take before she came back to check on Chuck's progress."

"He told her I knew where you were."

"He's becoming desperate if he's joining forces with my mother."

"What do you expect," Serena snapped. "You're keeping his children from him!"

"I thought you were on my side."

"I am," Serena responded as she calmed down quickly.

"Did she come see you?"

"She wants a meeting."

"No," Blair shook her head instantly. "Not if she's working with Chuck. I can't risk her telling him how to find me."

"Blair, she is really worried about you," Serena told her. "And since she confronted me in front of my mother, there is going to be a lot of tension when I get home. Even more so than there has been."

"What do you mean?"

"Well things were calming down from Jenny and then Vanessa drops the mother of all bombs on Dan."

"Which is?"

"Well, I told you she had the baby right?"

"A little boy. Jonathan, right," Blair nodded

"Right. He looks exactly like Rufus. Anyway, Vanessa tells Dan that it's not that she doesn't want to have a family with him, but that she doesn't want a family at all right now. She got some offer to work on a film in South America months ago and she told them that she'd taken it."

"And what about her son?" Blair gasped, "Is she just going to leave him behind?"

"She had papers drawn up a few months ago relinquishing custody. She signed them the day before Jonathan was born."

"How could she do such a thing? This is her child. She carried him for nine months. How could she even think of leaving him?"

"She wants something besides being a mom right now," Serena said. "Dan's defending her and I think Rufus is going to end having either a stroke or a heart attack from the crap that's happened to his kids lately."

"He's definitely gone through a lot. How is Dan doing with all of this?"

"I don't know," Serena shook her head. "Vanessa has been his best friend for a lot longer than she was his girlfriend and I think that this is making him think that he didn't know her at all."

"Yet he continues to defend her," Blair shook her head, "That makes no sense."

"She's the mother of his child. What is he suppose to do?" Serena inquired. "Chuck's defending you."

"Our situations are nothing alike," Blair responded defensively.

"I know," Serena said calmly. "I just think Dan's feeling like he got the short end of the stick in all this. Vanessa ignored him for months and he missed most of her pregnancy. She didn't even call him until after the baby was born. Then she tells him she's not staying and that raising Jonathan is going to be completely on him. I feel bad for him."

"Let's talk about something positive. How's Nate?" Blair decided to change subjects.

"He was recently dumped by his last girlfriend," Serena said.

"So it's time for you to swoop in and heal his broken heart," Blair suggested.

"I don't want to be his rebound girl," Serena shook her head.

"No," Blair shook her head. "That girl and all the girls from last summer were his rebounds. You are the one he wants to score with."

"Then I want to be more than a quick score to him. I want a future with him, but I don't know if we're in the same place. I really hurt him last summer."

"You had help and if he can still hang out with Humphrey, he can forgive you. And you know as well as I do you'd be more than a quick score to him. Serena, he cashed in his V-card with you while he had a girlfriend. That means something."

"I don't know what that means to him," she sighed, "He went back to you after it happened."

"Because you left," Blair replied. "He would have broken up with me in a second if you'd given any hint that there was a future with you."

"Why do you still talk to me? You had and have every right to hate me forever."

"Because you're my best friend and while guys are gonna come and go, I know that you're the one person who will always love me no matter what," Blair smiled. "And it led me to Chuck and to these two adorable little babies that I would trade my life for."

"You know I will right? That I will always love you no matter what?"

"Yes and I will always love you, no matter what," Blair told her.

-x-x-x-x-

Blair wiped down the counter and yawned. It was late on a blisteringly cold February evening. She wanted to close as quickly as she could so she could get back to her children. She had a baby monitor hooked on her belt as she cleaned up the last of the garbage from that day.

She heard the door jingle and sighed. She knew she should've locked the door first.

"Sorry, we're closed," she said without looking.

"Blair," a confused voice inquired.

"Humphrey, what in the hell are you doing in my café," Blair exclaimed as she recognized the voice and then the face in front of her as she turned towards him.

"I wanted some coffee and this was the only place open," he said.

"I always stay open late. It helps get business from the community college down the street, but even cramming co-eds know to stay inside on a night as cold as this."

"It looks like you're closing down. I can leave," Dan offered as he turned towards the door.

"Stop," Blair said. "Did Serena tell you where I was?"

"Does she know how to find you?" Dan asked in surprise, "I was under the impression that there had been no contact from you since you did your little disappearing act last fall."

"How about that, she can keep a secret," Blair chuckled in amusement.

"I guess so," Dan said with a nod.

"You look half frozen. I threw out the coffee but how about some hot chocolate?"

"Anything warm would be great," Dan replied as he took the seat she was offering.

"Cake of the day was apple. I have a couple of pieces left. You interested," Blair said as she put some cups out and warmed up the water through the coffee maker and put some mix in cups.

"Not if you made it," he shook his head.

"I think you'll be surprised," Blair laughed as she set a piece in front of him along with a cup of hot chocolate.

Dan looked at it skeptically and then shrugged, "You only live once." He took a bite and chewed. "This is good."

"Thank you. You should try my sour cream pound cake," Blair smiled as she took the seat across from him. "The locals claim I put cocaine in it because it's so addictive."

"Never saw you as a baker," he shrugged as he dove into the cake. It actually tasted so much better than he was letting on. "I figured that was what Dorota was for."

"Cookbooks and cooking classes are amazing inventions," Blair smiled tiredly. "So, I hear congratulations are in order. Jonathan, right?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "And congratulations to you, though I know nothing more than the fact that you obviously aren't still pregnant."

"Twins on Christmas day," Blair smiled. "Sabrina Rose and Sebastian Nathaniel."

"Jonathan's middle name is Rufus for my dad," Dan smiled.

"That's really sweet," Blair replied. "I'd happily show them off, but they're asleep upstairs in my apartment."

"You live here," Dan asked.

"Yes," Blair nodded. "I actually like it. The commute's short and I don't have to invest in Nannies."

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I thought nannies would be a prerequisite for you," Dan replied.

"We're a long way from Manhattan, Humphrey," Blair shrugged, "Things are a lot different now than they were before."

"Yeah, I guess they are," Dan said looking around. "This place is pretty cool."

"Thanks."

"I think my dad and Lily were at that concert," Dan pointed to a Bon Jovi poster.

"I play him a lot," Blair said.

"Being from Jersey and all, I'm sure they're a crowd pleaser."

"Yes, and I actually play a lot of country too. Believe it or not, Rascal Flatts is really popular."

"I could see that," Dan replied, "Not really my cup of tea, but they're tolerable. I prefer Lincoln Hawk myself."

"They're over there," Blair admitted. "I keep them for the older crowd that comes in."

"You do not," Dan grinned.

"You should see their faces when I tell them that my best friend's stepfather is none other than Lincoln Hawk's lead singer." Blair giggled.

"Any autograph requests?"

"Once in a while yes," Blair nodded.

"Dad will love that," Dan laughed, "I'll have to bring him out here sometime."

"As long as he doesn't tell Lily," Blair said quietly. "And that brings me to my next question. Do you plan on telling anyone you saw me?"

"If you mean Chuck, no," Dan responded. "That man deserves nothing from me."

"Right. Dan, I should have said it first and you might not want to hear it from me but I am so sorry about Jenny. I know she and I didn't get along but I would never wish what happened to her on anyone."

Dan sat quietly, unable to respond. He was still fighting through his grief, and the constant reminders around Manhattan and Brooklyn were not helping matters.

"What are you going to do once you get Jonathan," Blair asked him. "Are you going to go home to your dad? I'm sure he and Lily would be glad to have you."

"To tell you the truth, I don't know what I'm going to do," he admitted, "Being in New York is suffocating. I think perhaps I need a change of scenery. This town seems nice. Quiet, at least."

Blair looked at him carefully, "My night cashier quit on me last night."

"How about a job?" Dan inquired, "I can get you references if you need."

"I think you're pretty reliable. You always came to Serena's rescue when she needed you," Blair said. "You're a fast learner and you like music and books. I think you might work out. You do know how to make something other than waffles, right?"

"If you can learn to bake, I'm sure I can manage something," Dan teased.

"Funny," Blair smiled. "There a lot of apartments around here. Most of them are above businesses. I know of a few that are empty."

"That would be great," Dan responded as he gives Blair a grateful look.

"So, Vanessa's really leaving," Blair asked as she shook her head in disbelief.

"As soon as she can," Dan nodded.

"How could a mother leave her own child," Blair snarls as the rage filled her.

"It's a great opportunity," Dan felt compelled to defend Vanessa to Blair.

"It's abandonment," Blair said. She saw no grey area in this matter. "She's going to miss so much."

"This will open so many doors for her professionally," Dan continued to defend her.

"We're going to have to agree to disagree on this one," Blair responded calmly. "Because you'll never convince me this is anything but a mother abandoning her child for her own selfish reasons."

"Deal," Dan said. "We're meeting in the morning at some restaurant down the street, but I think I'll need to find a place to sleep for the evening."

"My sofa is comfortable," Blair stated.

"Are you offering?" Dan inquired with a raised eyebrow. Never in a million years did he think that Blair Waldorf would do anything nice for him let alone give him a job, help him find a place to live, and give him a place to crash for the night.

"Unbelievably yes," Blair nodded. "It's late and the nearest hotel is about a mile walk. The buses stopped running twenty minutes ago and since I know you can't drive, I doubt you have a car. So your options are sleeping on my sofa or walking in middle of the night down a potentially icy road to the hotel. And I'm sure you realize it's about five below outside without factoring in the wind chill?"

"The couch it is," Dan accepted her offer quickly before she had the thought of rejecting him.

"Could you lock the door," Blair asked as she got up from the table and turned the chair to rest on top of it.

"Whatever you say, Boss," Dan chuckled.

"Kinda like the way that sounds coming from you Humphrey," Blair smiled.

"This could be the beginning of an interesting friendship," Dan shook his head.

"How very Bogart of you, Humphrey," Blair responded in amusement.

"Funny," Dan nodded. "So, since I work for you does that mean I get to choose some of the music you sell?"

"Don't push it," Blair told him.


	9. Chapter 9

To my wonderful Beta, I thank you profusely. To my fans, I live for replies. After all, what writer doesn't?

-x-x-x-x-

Dan watched his boss as she scrubbed the counter.

Again.

He'd been working here for two weeks and she never washed the counter this much. He slowly and carefully reached out and took the rag from her. She looked up at him.

"Humphrey, what's the problem," Blair asked crossly.

"You tell me. That's the third time you've wiped down the counter in the lasts ten minutes. You're going to rub a hole in it at this rate."

"I didn't realize cleanliness was a problem."

"Blair, what's going on? You've been weird since we opened up this morning."

"I talked to Serena last night."

"Everything okay?"

"My mom's been asking to see me."

"See you," Dan raised an eyebrow. "Blair, do you mean you haven't seen her since you took off last fall?"

"Maybe. Sort of," Blair shrugged. "Okay, yes. I know her. She'll tell Chuck where I am."

"And would you except that as an excuse if it was Sabrina," Dan asked.

"You and Serena should really get back together. You both have the same internal speech writer."

"You mean we're good at making you feel guilty."

"Yes," Blair rolled her eyes. "And don't think I haven't had the same thought."

"So," Dan prompted.

"I hate you," Blair sulked.

"So, when?"

"I guess I'll have Serena set up a meeting in the next couple of days," Blair sighed. "I just hope I'm not making a huge mistake."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Serena stepped off the elevator and into the Waldorf penthouse.

"Miss Serena?"

"Hi Dorota. Is Eleanor here?"

"Mrs. Eleanor upstairs. I get," Dorota nodded. She paused at the bottom and looked back at Serena. "Miss Serena, Miss Blair is okay?"

"She's fine, Dorota."

"And her babies?"

Serena took a picture out of her purse, "That's them. Sebastian is in the dark green and Sabrina's in purple."

"I can keep," Dorota asked.

"Yes," Serena asked. "Is Eleanor in her office?"

"Yes," Dorota nodded.

"I'll just go up," Serena sad, squeezing Dorota's arm and then headed upstairs. She walked down the hall and stopped in front of Eleanor's office door. She knocked.

"Come in, Dorota," Eleanor said with her usual impatient tone.

Serena poked her head in, "Sorry, not Dorota."

"Serena," Eleanor looked up. "How are you my dear?"

"I'm good," Serena came further into the room. "I actually have some news."

"Blair? Is she alright?"

"She's fine," Serena assured her. "I finally convinced her to meet with you."

"What? How?"

"By applying a little guilt," Serena said. "How would she feel if Sabrina ran off and wouldn't talk to her?"

"You'd make a wonderful politician," Eleanor smiled.

"We'll see. There is one stipulation, Eleanor."

"I can't tell Chuck," Eleanor guessed.

"Right," Serena nodded. "Meet me at Penn Station tomorrow at five am. I'll give you the destination then."

"Tomorrow it is then."

-x-x-x-x-x

Blair set down a cup of coffee in front of her mother and then sat down across from her.

"This is an interesting place."

"Thank you." Blair heard her mother's judgmental tone but chose to ignore it.

"I would've expected a clothing store."

"If I'd opened a clothing store I might as well have hung a banner saying 'Here I am, Chuck. Come get me'," Blair rolled her eyes.

"A café is hardly a good place to raise children, Blair."

"And where should I raise them Mom? Your penthouse or perhaps a hotel suite in the Palace?"

"This isn't a proper place for a Waldorf," Eleanor said.

"Well then I guess it's a good thing I changed my name," Blair snarked at her.

"You may go by another name, but you're a Waldorf and those children deserve all the best you can give him."

"I am giving them my best Mom," Blair said. "And contrary to what you think, that doesn't mean that they need to have a penthouse on the Upper East Side, bottomless bank accounts, and designer wardrobes. They have a mom who puts them above her work and who knows them better than the nanny does."

"But no father. Chuck deserves a chance to be a part of these children's lives."

"Forget it, Mother," Blair shook her head. "I cannot trust Chuck, and I cannot allow anyone to be a part of my children's lives that I cannot trust."

"How can he regain your trust if you will not even give him a chance to try?" Eleanor inquired. "He's a miserable wreck without you and the children. He's not eating or sleeping. He's spent thousands, possibly millions to find you."

Blair shut her eyes and shook her head before she looked back at her mother, "Is it too much to ask for you to be on my side in all this? I am your daughter. You gave birth to me. How about some loyalty, Mother?"

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart. I know you're right, but Charles is. . "

"Stop, Mother, I don't want to hear it," Blair snapped.

"That's too bad, Blair. You're a mother, but children need two parents."

"Because that worked out so well when you and Daddy tried it."

"Your father and I made a lot of mistakes but we tried."

"I know you did," Blair sighed. "But-"

"He told me to tell you that he loves you."

"I wish that was enough. Love has never been the problem for us, at least not since we graduated high school. It's about trust."

"Sweetheart, Charles wants to regain your trust. Why can't you let him?"

"He traded me for a hotel. He slept with Jenny Humphrey."

"And you've taken his children away from him. I'd say you're about even now."

"He had me worried sick all summer long," Blair cried. "The only Bass I could find was Jack."

"I somehow doubt that was done to hurt you."

"I can't trust him not to bail on us," Blair shook her head. "Mom, I'm glad to see you and I would love for you to meet your grandchildren but if you go to Chuck and tell him where I am you will never see us again."

"I will do as you ask, but Sweetheart, think about this long and hard. Chuck will not stop looking for you. How do you see this playing out? Are you going to run every time that he gets close, change your name and your children's names? Do you want your children to live on the run for the rest of their lives?"

"I don't know," Blair replied. She looked up when she heard the door jingle. "We're closed for fifteen more minutes. Can you come back?"

The kid in the doorway looked at her strangely.

"Look, I said we're closed. Please leave," Blair demanded impatiently. Her mother had tried the last of hers, and she was all out at the moment.

"Give me your money," the kid demanded.

"We don't have any," Blair said as she stood up from her chair. "We haven't opened up yet."

"Give me whatever is in your till," he continued to demand as he pulled out a gun and pointed it at the pair, who gasped in fear. "And the lady's jewelry." he added as he waved the gun towards Eleanor.

Blair made her way to the register and opened it up, "There's not much here."

"And the jewels," the man growled as he waved the gun towards Eleanor again as Blair handed him all the money in the till.

"Mom, give him your jewelry," Blair said.

Eleanor began taking of her jewelry with shaking hands. She handed over everything except her wedding ring.

"The ring too," the kid said.

"No," Eleanor shook her head defiantly.

"Mom," Blair gasped as she looked at her mother. They were both trembling in fear, but her mother's firm stand surprised everyone in the room.

"Cyrus gave me this."

"He can get you a new one."

"You cannot replace a wedding ring," Eleanor scoffed, even though her voice quivered with fear.

"And replacing a life is so much easier?"

"Give it here," the man demanded as he reached for the ring. Eleanor began struggling with him. Everything happened quickly as suddenly a gunshot rung out.

"Mom," Blair cried as the kid rounded on her. There was a bang and everything went black.

-x-x-x-x-

"Hello?"

"Dad?"

"Dan?"

"I need you," Dan said in a shaky voice.

"What's wrong?" Rufus asked as he heard his son's voice quiver.

"I-Blair-you and Lily need to come here."

"Where is here," Rufus asked. Dan had told him he was living in New Jersey, but not exactly where. It stunned him when Blair's name came out of his son's mouth. His son tolerated Blair, as she did him. Since she'd left New York, there was barely a word spoken about her except by those that she was closest with. His grief hadn't allowed him to care about her welfare or that of her children. He faintly remembered hearing she'd given birth to twins.

"Morristown Memorial Hospital," Dan said. "You should bring Serena and Nate."

"Are you alright? Is Jonathan okay?" Rufus asked, his voice turning frantic to equal Dan's.

"We're fine," Dan assured him quickly. "Dad, does Lily know how to get in touch with Cyrus?"

"I'm sure she does," Rufus responded. "My wife can get in touch with nearly everyone. She's extremely talented in that respect."

"That's good because she's going to need to call Harold Waldorf, too."

"Dan, what's going on?"

"Blair and Eleanor were shot today. Blair's in surgery and Eleanor's gone," Dan said as calmly as he could.

"Oh my god!" Rufus exclaimed. "We're on our way."

"Thanks Dad."

"Of course," Rufus said. He hung up. "Lily? Where are you?"

"I'm right here, Rufus," Lily responded calmly. "Is everything alright, Dear?"

"Lils, I think you better sit down."

"Oh no," Lily said. "I hate it when conversations start like that."

"Start like what, Mom," Serena and Eric came in.

Rufus lost his voice as he looked to Serena.

"Rufus? Are you alright," Serena asked as she saw the tears forming in her step-father's eyes.

"There's something you three need to know."

"Rufus, you're scaring me," Lily announced.

"Dan just called."

"Is Jonathan alright," Lily asked.

"He's fine. Serena, did you know he's living near Blair?"

Serena suddenly looked very uncomfortable, "Uh, well, yes I did. She runs a café in Jersey, and Dan works for her."

"Well, something happened today."

"What?"

"There was a shooting. I'm sorry but Eleanor's gone."

"What about Blair," Serena gasped as tears sprung from her eyes.

"She's in surgery," Rufus said.

"We need to get to her," Serena choked out.

"Serena, you should call Nate. Lily, you need to get in touch with Cyrus and Harold."

"We can do that from the car," Serena announced.

"Tell Nate to meet us at the station," Eric said as he grabbed his coat.

"I'll be right back," Lily said. "I have to get my book so I can call Cyrus and Harold."

"And I'm calling Chuck," Serena announced.

"Serena," Rufus started.

"I am calling Chuck," Serena repeated. "He loves her and he deserves to know."

"That man deserves nothing," Rufus hissed.

"I am still calling him."

0g0g0g0g0g0g

"What is it, van der Woodsen," Chuck growled in annoyance when he answered her third call. He'd avoided the other two, but he was resigned to the fact that she'd keep calling until she said whatever she needed to.

"I need you to get in a car or on a train or in a plane," Serena said as she stared out the window of train she and her family were on. "And I need you to do it now."

"Where would I be heading?" Chuck inquired curiously.

"Morristown Memorial Hospital," Serena informed him with tears in her voice.

"Hospital, what's wrong? Is it Lily?" Chuck gasped.

Serena sighed, "No, Mom's fine. Chuck, it's Blair."

"What is it? What happened?" Chuck asked fearfully as he dashed towards the elevator.

"Chuck, she was shot," Serena told him quietly.

"What do you mean she was shot? You said she was living in a safe area," Chuck snarled.

"I don't know how it happened and do not yell at me right now, Chuck," Serena said. "I can't take being yelled at right now."

"I'm on my way," Chuck assured her as he hung up on her quickly and called for his helicopter to be ready as soon as he could get to the helipad. With any luck he'd be there before Serena and everyone else.

-x-x-x-x-

"You," Chuck said lowly when he saw Dan leaning against the wall of the waiting room. "What the hell are you doing here?" He could see the blood on Dan's shirt.

"I'm here for Blair. She's my boss," Dan stammered out.

"You've known how to find her," Chuck snarled as he brought his hand to Dan's throat and began choking him.

Dan's eyes went wide as he felt the air leave his body. He'd seen Chuck in a rage before but never like this.

"Chuck," Nate said appearing at his friends' sides. "Chuck! Stop it." He pulled his friend's hand away.

"Give me one reason I shouldn't knock you on your ass and then erase you from this planet," Chuck hissed at Dan. "How could you keep Blair and my children from me? Do you hate me that much?"

"My sister-"

"Don't," he barked. "Don't use Jenny as an excuse for what you've done. I didn't hold a gun to Jenny's head and force her into my bed. She made her own bed in all of this."

"Shut up," Dan snarled at him. "Blair and her kids are better off without you."

"Really? Eleanor is dead. Blair might join her. This could have been prevented if you had told me where she was. You have been nothing but a thorn in everyone's side since they day you entered our world. How we've tolerated you for this long is anyone's guess. Get out. You do not belong here, you never did."

"She's my boss and my friend," Dan said. "You see this? This is hers," he motioned to the blood on his shirt. "I had to hold a towel to her chest so she wouldn't bleed all over the floor of her café."

"Dan probably saved her life," Nate chimed in. "At least that is what the doctors are saying."

"And Eleanor?"

"She was gone before I got there," Dan said quietly. "I saw a man running from the café as I walked to work. When I came in Blair was unconscious and bleeding profusely. Eleanor was gone."

"Leave," Chuck hissed. "Leave before I do something I cannot undo."

"You should have thought of that before you took my sister into your bed," Dan hissed as he held his ground.

"Okay, you two need to calm down," Nate got between them and held them apart as they lunged towards each other. "We're in a hospital. People are sick here. They do not need to hear you two trying to kill each other over what happened with Jenny and what Dan didn't or did tell you."

"Fine, stay, but stay out of my sight," Chuck snarled.

"Gladly," Dan said as he walked down the hall.

"You okay," Nate asked.

"How did you get here so fast?"

"I used your name and called one of the other helicopters Bass Industries keeps when Serena called me."

"How's Blair?" Chuck inquired, nearly in tears.

"Alive and in surgery," Nate told him. "That's all I know." He checked his watch. "I'm gonna go try Harold again. Lily gave me his number."

"And my children, where are they? Are they safe?" Chuck asked as he reached out to stop Nate from leaving

"Dan said something about a neighbor when I got here."

"Bring them to me," Chuck demanded. "Blair will want to see them when she gets out of surgery."

"Maybe we should wait until her surgery's over. She's lost a lot of blood. She may be unconscious for some time."

"I don't care," he hissed.

"Chuck, you may have to face the fact that she could-"

"Don't," Chuck warned him. "Don't say it. Don't even think it."

"You think I want to? I've known her as long as you have. I went out with her for a long time."

"Don't you pretend to have ever cared about her as much as I do," he snarled. "She is the love of my life and the mother of my children."

"In case you've forgotten, she could have been the mother of mine," Nate shot back at him.

"Never would have happen," he spat out.

"Oh really? Why not?"

"Because she's always belonged with me, even when she was with you, she was destined for me."

Nate didn't say anything for a moment. "You've always loved her, haven't you?"

"All my life," he nodded. "I cannot allow for the possibility that she won't pull through because then my life might as well be over."

"You can't do that," Nate said. "If she doesn't pull through it'll be a tragedy but you need to go on. You can't turn into Bart, Chuck. I won't watch your son and daughter grow up feeling about you the way you felt about Bart."

"Oh god, my children," he gasped as the tears began to rain down his cheeks. "I need to see them. Please."

"I'll get Dan to call the neighbor. With Eleanor gone and Harold not here, Lily's the grandparent in this situation and the closest family member they have."

"She's not the closest family member they have. I am," Chuck reminded him.

"And if I tell Dan to have them brought down because you want to see them, he'll laugh in my face and refuse."

"Point taken," Chuck conceded. "Whatever you have to do to get them here, please do it."

"I'll go find Dan," Nate said before he left.

-d-d-d-d-

"Thought I might find you out here," Serena said, sitting down next to him after she found him sitting in the frigid cold courtyard.

"Is she out of surgery," Chuck asked.

"Not yet. How are you holding up?"

"Don't even ask that question until she's out of surgery," he responded as his breathe came out as a white cloud.

"You know, this is where your kids were born," Serena told him.

"If you're looking to make small talk, it's going to be a one sided conversation. I have nothing in me right now," Chuck groaned.

"Just trying to keep you informed," Serena said. "I walked out this way when I left Blair on Christmas morning. I could see a million stars in the sky."

"I appreciate the effort," Chuck responded, "But I can't do this now. I can't take the reminder of what I missed and what I could possibly lose."

Serena bit her lip and put her hand on Chuck's shoulder, "I used to hate it when you called me 'Sis' in the beginning. But you've changed so much since you've joined our family. Blair has always brought out the best in you. I hope you never forget that."

"I never thanked you for telling me she was pregnant," Chuck said. "If you hadn't I'd be somewhere in Europe with Eva-"

"Was that her name?"

"And I'd have no idea this was happening."

"You'd have known," Serena responded, "You could pretend to be someone else for awhile, but we both know you'd have returned to her eventually. Blair is your soul mate."

"I just want her to be okay and I want her back home with me."

"And I hope you get your wish," Serena responded as she rubbed his shoulder gently.

"Nate loves you," Chuck said suddenly. "He loves you and he wants you back. So, if you love him don't waste time. Take it from me, tomorrow is not guaranteed.


	10. Chapter 10

Thank you to my beta and to all who replied last time. Keep it up!

-x-x-x-

Serena unlocked the door to Blair's apartment and switched on the lights. Nate pushed a reluctant Chuck in ahead of him.

"I should be at the hospital," Chuck said. He'd been forced out of the hospital, and each step he took had been a struggle ever since.

"The doctor said she wasn't going to be waking up until tomorrow morning so sleeping here is an infinitely better idea than sleeping on a chair in her room," Nate said.

"Mrs. Katz," Serena called quietly and an older woman came out of the back room. "Hi, I'm Serena. I think Dan told you we were coming?"

"Yes, I just got off the phone with him. I'm so glad Blair's going to be alright," the woman smiled.

"So are we," Serena dug into her purse for some money.

"Don't worry about paying me," Mrs. Katz said. "I already worked out something with Dan."

"You're a fan of my step father, right?" Serena inquired, "Dan said his father was going to autograph a concert poster for you."

"I met my husband at a Lincoln Hawk concert."

Serena smiled, "That's sweet."

"I'll be back tomorrow."

"Bye," Serena let her out and then turned back to the boys. "Chuck, come with me."

"Where?"

"Just come on," Serena took his hand and pulled him down the hall and into the nursery. "I think this meeting is long overdue."

Chuck stared at the two cribs by rear wall. He stopped walking and Serena turned to look at him when her hand extended behind her.

"Chuck," Serena said quietly. "It's okay."

"She's not here." Chuck shook his head. "Blair should be here for this."

"It's okay," Serena insisted.

Chuck walked closer and stood next to Serena. His breath caught as he took in the beautiful sight of his children fast asleep.

"Now this," she pointed to her right, "is Sabrina. I think you're gonna have a lot of trouble with boys once she becomes a teenager, Chuck, because as you can see she looks just like her mother. And this is Sebastian. Blair's already looking into military schools because when she looks at him, she sees you and we all know how much trouble you were as a teenager. Children, this is your daddy."

Chuck stared at them before he cautiously touched their stomachs. On contact his eyes slid closed and he managed a tremulous smile.

"Can I have a moment," he inquired as he marveled at the pair before him.

"Yeah, I want to change my clothes anyways," Serena said.

"I'm gonna call home. I don't know if my mom knows yet," Nate added his excuse.

"There's a phone in Blair's room," Serena told Nate before she turned toward Chuck again. "We're down the hall if you need us."

"Thank you," Chuck said. He waited until he heard Blair's bedroom door shut and the low murmur of Nate's voice before he looked back at his children. "Hello… Well, like Aunt Serena said I am your father. I know I haven't been there for you since the beginning, and I'm so very sorry for that. However, I promise to be there for you from now on. I'll be there when you need me and even when you think you don't. I cannot say this enough, but I promise."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck tried to turn on the light in the small kitchen. He flipped a switch and light flooded from underneath a door at the far end of the kitchen. He crossed the room and pulled the door open, figuring it was a pantry or something. He found a set of stairs instead. He went down and found himself in another kitchen only this one was much bigger. He could see the dim glow of lights coming through a service window and went towards them. He pushed open a swinging door and found himself in Blair's café. He felt along the wall and found the switch. Flipping it on the room was flooded with light from overhead.

His eyes went to the register that was still open and then the table near the far wall. It still had teacups on it. He could see the yellow police tape across the door and he had to look away. When he looked back his eyes were drawn to the chalk outline on the floor where Eleanor had fallen. He stepped around the counter and stopped when he saw the blood.

He couldn't stand. He couldn't even feel his legs as he sank to the floor. Tears were running down his face and all he could think about was what had caused that blood stain.

Someone had shot his beautiful Blair. Some vile monster had hurt the love of his life in the most savage way possible. Whatever he had to do, he would see to it that the demon paid for his crime.

Chuck was sobbing uncontrollably as his finger felt the stickiness of the dried blood, Blair's blood.

"Chuck," Nate's voice spoke tentatively. "You shouldn't be in here."

"Crime scene, right," Chuck said in a gasp through his tears. "Can't disturb it."

"This is where it happened," Nate looked around in disbelief. Aside from the two pools of blood, the cafe looked like the type of place he could see himself spending time drinking coffee, listening to music, and pretending to study. "Blair did a great job with this place. Serena showed me before pictures of this place. It was a monstrosity before she worked her magic."

"She does a great job with whatever she sets her mind to," Chuck stated as he looked at his fingers that were smudged with blood. He looked up at the windows that said _Thayer's_.

"I've always thought so," Nate smiled a little.

"Especially our children," Chuck added.

"Chuck, come back upstairs," Nate urged as he hauled Chuck to his feet. "You shouldn't be in here. Everything's too raw right now."

"Everything has been too raw for months," Chuck grumbled as he allowed Nate to lead him back to Blair's apartment. He didn't even think about it as he stepped into the nursery again as if drawn by some magical force.

Serena looked over her shoulder. She'd been standing by the cribs. "I knew I should've locked the kitchen door."

"I want to hold them," Chuck told Serena as he stepped closer to look at the infants. Both had their eyes open and were staring back at him intently.

"Alright," Serena nodded. "Take a seat in the rocking chair." She picked up Sabrina and placed her in the crook of Chuck's left arm before she picked up Sebastian and put him in the crook of his right arm. "You okay?"

"Yes," he nodded as the warmth and weight of the pair overwhelmed him. "How did Mommy manage for so many months on her own? You two weigh a ton."

"Did you want me to take one?" Serena asked quickly.

"No," Chuck shook his head. "I'm fine."

"Okay," Serena nodded. Then she backed away until she was standing in the doorway. She turned and watched from the doorway unwilling to leave them alone just yet. She tilted her head to rest against the doorframe. She felt Nate join her a moment or two later.

"All the lights are off downstairs," he said quietly.

"Thanks," Serena smiled as she continued to watch from the doorway with a soft smile on her face. She reaches for Nate's hand and the familiar spark is renewed as their fingers lace together.

"Nate," Serena said quietly.

"Hmm?"

"I love you, too."

Nate looked at her with a startled expression before he leaned in and kissed her cheek softly.

Serena smiled at him before she looked back at their friend. The children were giggling at something Chuck had whispered and Chuck was smiling for the first time in nearly a year. "Chuck, do you want me to make up the couch for you?"

"If you don't mind, I'll be heading back to the hospital to be with Blair. Will the two of you be able to stay with Sabrina and Sebastian?"

"Of course. But you need sleep, too," Serena reminded him gently as she lifted Sabrina from his arms and returned her to the crib.

"I'll sleep at the hospital," Chuck assured her as he gingerly lowered Sebastian into his. The twins fell asleep instantly.

"I'll call you a cab," Nate said as he gave Serena a soft look and then walked from the nursery to Blair's kitchen. Chuck and Serena followed. "Do you want me to come with you," he asked after making the arrangements.

"No, stay and help Serena," Chuck responded. "She'll need all the help she can get. She has about as much experience with children as you do."

"And you're Mary Poppins," Nate responded sarcastically. "Until today have you ever even held a baby?"

"No fighting," Serena said before Chuck could utter a word. "There will be no fighting until Blair is awake and able to fight with us."

Chuck pushed his way towards the children's nursery again to kiss the sleeping foreheads before he left them for the evening. "Mommy and Daddy love you," he whispered as he kissed each of their tiny hands.

Serena watched him go and then sank onto the couch. Nate locked the door behind Chuck and sat next to her. He put an arm around her and she leaned into him.

"She has to be alright," Serena whispered.

"She's Blair Waldorf," Nate told her softly as she buried her face into his chest, savoring the familiar warmth against her cheek. "She'll be just fine."

"Chuck grew up with two fears. One: That he would never be good enough for his father and two: that he would turn into his father. The first one we can't do anything about anymore."

"And the second one won't happen," Nate said. "Whatever we have to do, we'll keep him from becoming Bart."

"I was in the room when she gave birth. I was wearing scrubs and holding her hand and listening to her curse like a sailor on leave. But when it was over, there were these two new people in the world. She looked so exhausted but so happy," Serena said with a smile as they both leaned back against the couch. "She needs to be there for them Nate. She needs to be there for all three of them."

"She will," he tried to reassure her, "We need to have faith in her, and in Chuck. He's going to do whatever it takes to see her through this."

"He's Chuck Bass. He's not God."

"He's as close to God as we're going to get," Nate chuckled slightly. "He will move mountains if he has to, if it means getting Blair well."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck opened the door to Blair's room and slipped in quietly. The only sound was the beep-beep of the heart monitor. He was both disturbed and comforted by the sound. But the only thing he saw was the girl lying in the bed.

He set down the peonies next to her bedside as he sat down in the chair. "Hello, Beautiful," he whispered as he kissed her forehead softly and took her hand in his. "I'm sorry I wasn't waiting when you got here. Serena took me to meet our children. They're beautiful. Sabrina looks just like you. I think I'm gonna have to build a moat our home when she becomes a teenager.

"And Sebastian, he's going to be a little chip off the old block. He's going to keep us on our toes.

"I saw the cafe. It's a little messy right now but we can get it cleaned up. I'm proud of you, Blair. It's a great place. Though your choice in employees needs some work. Dan Humphrey, Blair? Really?

"Please don't leave me," he pleaded with her, "I won't know how to be a father without you. I don't know how to be a decent human being without you. Everything good in me is you.

"You said you'd always be my family," he reminded her. "Well, we have a family Blair and we need you to be okay. I know it's going to hurt, but I will be there with you. I'm done running away from us. It has and always will be you and me, Blair."

He felt Blair squeeze his hand slightly. Her eyes were still closed but it was a positive sign.


	11. Chapter 11

Okay first off, thank you to my fans. Second, thank you to my beta. Third, I hate feeling sorry for Jenny. Fourth, Vanessa you bitca! Fifth, Kill, kill, kill Juliet! Sixth, This chapter is dedicated to TriGemini who was my 100th reply.

0d0d0d0d0d0d0d0

Serena buttoned up the shirt she'd chosen to wear from Blair's wardrobe and smiled at Nate's reflection in the mirror, as he appeared from his attempt to feed the twins after Serena's attempt at bathing and dressing them taxed her nerves, "How'd you do?"

Nate shook his head as he stepped in behind her and grabbed her around the waist, "How does she do that every morning by herself and not drop either of them? They're so squirmy."

"Blair was always better at balancing things than either of us," Serena smiled.

"Funny," Nate frowned at her. "Do you know how odd it is to have two infants make you feel incompetent?"

"Think of it as practice," Serena smiled. "You want a family one day, right?"

"You know all this time, I've actually wondered what it would've been like to have a family with Blair. Now I know," Nate released and her sat down on the bed. "I can't imagine being in Chuck's place right now."

Serena turned around and looked at him, "Did you ever want to have a family with Blair?"

"It crossed my mind once or twice when we were together," Nate admitted.

"I guess that makes sense. You two were together for a long time," Serena nodded.

"Did it ever cross yours?"

"Modern science hasn't made procreation between me and Blair possible yet," Serena teased.

"Funny," Nate responded sarcastically. "And you know what I mean."

"You're asking if I ever thought about having a family with Dan," Serena guessed.

"Yes," Nate nodded.

"Maybe, at one point, I considered it, but we were both so young" Serena nodded as she sat down next to him on the bed. "That particular dream faded long ago."

"Any new dreams," Nate asked as she rested her head against his shoulder and entwined her fingers with his.

"Maybe a few," Serena admitted with a smile. "But we will talk about those later, much later. Right now, I have to catch a cab and go to the hospital while you wait here for Mrs. Katz and Dan. Once Mrs. Katz gets here you're going downstairs to help Dan clean up the mess in Blair's café. Then, with any luck, you can open up for a while."

"And when exactly did I volunteer for this duty," Nate inquired.

"When you were taking a shower this morning, Dan was looking for help, and you seemed like the natural choice," Serena explained.

"I'd like to go to the hospital too," Nate reminded her.

"You will," Serena assured him as she got up to find her shoes. "We can switch around five. One of us is going to have to bring Chuck home for a shower and some real food. Speaking of food, find Blair's chef's number and call him. Let him know he might have to work today."

"Anything else?"

"Yeah. Let's try to have dinner together tonight," Serena smiled at him as she slipped her feet into her flats.

"Deal."

-x-x-x-x-x-

"Okay Rufus. I will send someone to help Mom and Eric," Serena said into her cell phone as she walked down the hall of the hospital towards Blair's room. Internally she was wondering why she was becoming the coordinator for everything that needed to happen; first Blair's café and now Eleanor's memorial service. If the doctors began asking her for medical advice, she was going to scream.

"Serena, your mom just handed me a note. Did you know Harold had arrived?"

"No, I didn't know Harold had arrived. I wish he'd called. I would've met him at the airport," Serena frowned. "He and Chuck shouldn't be in the same room at the moment."

"_How dare you show your face here?"_

"_Me? Where the hell were you yesterday when she was in surgery and fighting for her life? While we're at it, where were you when she making herself sick for most of high school? Oh, that's right. You were where you always are, someplace else, which is conveniently an ocean away."_

"Uh, Rufus? Let me call you back," Serena said as she heard and recognized two very angry voices coming from the waiting room.

"Okay," Rufus said.

Serena hung up her cell phone and walked into the waiting room where Harold and Chuck were circling each other. She spotted Roman on the other side of the room and he waved at her nervously but neither Chuck nor Harold had noticed her arrival. She sighed, knowing she had only one course of action, and put her purse in the seat nearest to the door before she marched to the center of the room and got up on the small wooden coffee table.

"That will be quite enough," she commanded angrily.

"Serena, get down from there," Harold encouraged.

"No. Would you two care to explain yourselves? I could hear you halfway down the hall."

"He doesn't have the right to be here," Harold pointed at Chuck.

"He doesn't have the right to decide who should be here and who shouldn't be. He hasn't been around for years. He barely knows her anymore, and she surely doesn't know who Blair would wouldn't want here," Chuck growled.

"Oh my God," Serena rubbed her forehead as she felt a headache forming. "You two have got to be the most selfish people on the planet."

"Serena," Chuck looked offended.

"Young lady," Harold said sternly.

"No," Serena shook off both of their reprimands. "First off, have either of you called Cyrus to see how he is or to offer your condolences? Because, in case you've forgotten, his wife just died. Harold, you especially should call him because she's not only your ex-wife, she is the mother of your daughter. Maybe you could offer to help with the arrangements so that he and my mother aren't stuck arranging everything? Next have either of you bothered to call Dorota? You remember her, right? The woman who pretty much raised Blair."

"Well-"

Serena put her hand up, "Don't go to the trouble of answering that because I know the answer. And the reason I know the answer is because I just got off the phone with Rufus. Dorota is on the phone with Eric and she can't stop crying."

"Serena, we appreciate your concern," Harold started.

"I am not done, Harold. Next, your daughter is a grown woman with a business and two children of her own and like it or not, Chuck's their father. I realize you love her but she does not need you to protect her from Chuck because, no matter how much of a jackass he was last year, Blair does love him."

"Thank you, Serena," Chuck said dryly.

"Oh don't thank me," Serena turned to him. "You, of all people, know how much Blair loves her father and how close they are. What on earth made you think it'd be a good idea to get into a screaming match with him in the middle of the hospital? When she wakes up you two are going to have a lot of explaining to do because there is no way I'm not telling her about this. Now, I am done." Serena got down from the coffee table. "Roman, it's always a pleasure," she said with a smile before she left the room.

Chuck and Harold looked at each other with guilt. Serena had made valid points. Whether they liked it or not, they were going to have to deal with each other's presence. Begrudgingly the muttered apologies as they shook each other's hands. If only for Blair, they would try to remain civil.

-x-x-x-x-x-

"Hey B," Serena sat down next to her friend's bedside. "You wouldn't believe the idiocy I just walked in on. But I think you'd like the way I handled it. I got up on a coffee table and said in true Cornelia Waldorf fashion, 'That will be quite enough.' I think your grandma would have been proud of me."

"Serena," Blair moaned as her eyes fluttered open.

"Blair," Serena nearly dropped the flowers she'd picked up to change their placement. Instead she put them back quickly and stood back up. "Blair?"

"Not so loud," Blair groaned as she felt the sound of Serena's words ringing in her ears. "Where am I? What happened? Where are Sabrina and Sebastian?"

"They're fine. They're at your apartment with your neighbor. Oh my God," Serena felt tears spring to her eyes. "You're awake."

"Where am I?" Blair repeated, "What happened?"

"You're in the hospital. You were shot," Serena told her quietly. She pressed the call button. "But you're going to be okay and you're awake. Thank God."

"How long have I been out?" Blair inquired as she looked around the room. The only personal touch aside from the sterile hospital furnishings were the pink peonies next to her bed, a telltale sign that Chuck had been there. "You called him?"

"I had to," Serena protested. "You were shot. If you had died, he'd never have forgiven any of us."

"How could you, S?" Blair groaned as the sudden pain in her chest hit her. She wanted to rage at her best friend some more for the gross miscalculation, but the pain became unbearable.

Serena bolted to the door in panic, "Hey, we need some help in here!"

Aside from the doctor and nurse that sprinted towards Blair's room, Chuck and Harold were close behind as the panic in Serena's voice caused their own panic.

Both men gasped in surprise to see Blair awake, but in tears as the pain was almost too much for her to take.

Serena met them at the door, knowing that the doctors wouldn't want them in there. "No," she said to both men. "We stay here until the doctors say something."

"She's awake," Chuck gasped as he looked through the hospital glass as the doctor and nurse moved around the room quickly.

"She's awake. She woke up when I started telling what idiots you two were being," Serena told him.

"Does she know about her mother?" Harold inquired.

"I don't think she remembers what happened yet. She knows she was shot and she knows that the kids are okay," Serena said. "But that's all she knows. I didn't have a chance to tell her anything else.

"It's probably best if she doesn't know right now," Serena added after a few moments of silence as the trio continued to watch the medical professionals work to ease Blair's considerable discomfort. "The bullet she took came awfully close to her heart. News like this could make what little recovery she's made obsolete and possibly do further damage to the fragile repairs the surgeons made last night.

"And that means you two are not going to cause her any stress," she faced them both. "No talking about taking her and the kids back to France once she's better and no asking for forgiveness until she's ready. That is my best friend in there and if either of you compromise her recovery I will personally strangle you and on your end Chuck, I will send the name of every girl you've ever slept with and the name of the guy you kissed to Gossip Girl."

"Just the one," Chuck tried to lighten the mood a little. "There were others. And if you know the names of all the women, could you let me know. I'm not sure I knew half of them."

Serena couldn't help but laugh before she hugged her step-brother. Chuck accepted it in surprise and tightened his grip when he realized she was crying. "It's okay, Serena," Chuck whispered into her ear as he felt her fighting her emotions. "Let it out."

Serena gasped as her tears ran down her face, soaking Chuck's shirt. She shook her head, "I-I h-have to c-calm down. B-Blair can't see me like this."

"Take as much time as you need," Chuck assured her, "Nobody is going anywhere, certainly not B."

Serena slapped his chest as his attempt at humor fell flat. "Ass," she muttered. "Thank you, by the way. I told Nate how I felt last night. I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't known he felt the same way."

"You two deserve to be happy," Chuck told her. The gentleness in his reply surprised her. She'd never seen him like this in all the years she'd known him. She began to understand how Blair had allowed herself to fall for him in the first place.

"You know I honestly never thought I'd say this but, you're a good brother," Serena told him with a smile. "And you're going to be a great father. You're already better at it than Bart or William were."

"That's not saying all that much," he huffed.

"I think you'll be better at it than I was," Harold said quietly.

"Harold," Serena turned around. "Blair adores you. The entire time we were growing up the relationship you two had was something she cherished above everything else.

"It made me so jealous," she added as she reached out to hug the man that began to tear at her words.

"I haven't been much of a father to her these past several years," Harold spoke sternly. Chuck's words stung more than he'd let on because he knew they were the truth.

"You were there for her all last summer. I was there too, remember? You called every two days and you made the trips into Paris just to go to the doctor's with her. You convinced Eleanor to give her access to her trust fund and you managed to find a way around the conditions your mom set up so Blair could have access to that one too."

"One summer and a boatload of money does not make up for how I abandoned her," Harold continued with his self loathing.

"I won't lie," Serena said. "That hurt her a lot but I have no room to judge because I abandoned her not too long after. But when she really needs you, you're always there and that is a lot more than I can say about my father."

"Harold, Blair loves you," Chuck chimed in, "You should see the smile that lights up her face each time you call."

Harold was taken aback by Chuck's kind words, especially after what they'd said minutes earlier.

He studied the man his daughter loved and as he looked in his eyes, he was reminded of Evelyn Bass. She'd been a good woman and he still missed her. She'd have been so happy to see Chuck in love with Blair. "Tell me something, do either of my grandchildren have their father's eyes?"

"Sebastian is Chuck's exact replica," Serena chimed in. "Including his eyes."

Chuck felt a lump in his throat and looked down as he realized what or rather who Harold was thinking about. It still hit him sometimes that Anne, Lily, Eleanor, and Evelyn had all been pregnant around the same time and that the only one who wasn't still here was his own mother. He felt Harold's hand on his shoulder and looked up.

"She was a good woman. Never doubt that," Harold told him.

Chuck nodded as the lump in his throat made it impossible to give a verbal response.

"I think I'm going to go give Cyrus a call," Harold said. "You were right before Serena. I should help him out. Then I think I'll call Lily and ask her if Eric's had any luck calming down Dorota."

"Thank you," Serena smiled.

"Harold," Chuck called out to him as he turned away, "offer Cyrus my condolences as well."

"I will," Harold nodded.

Harold left the step-siblings alone and Serena put her arm through Chuck's and her head on his shoulder, "You okay?"

"I've talked a lot about my mom lately and both times it was with Blair's parents," Chuck admitted. "It just feels a little strange. I hardly ever talk about her."

"If you ever want to, you can talk to me about her," Serena offered.

"My mother?" he inquired, "What is there to discuss? I didn't know her. Bart never talked about her. All I have is one picture. Why do you think I latched onto that faux mother Jack sent to swindle me?"

"Because you wanted to think you had at least one parent still around after all the crap Bart gave you over the years and all the guilt you felt," Serena said. "And while she wasn't your mom, you do still have one."

"And she's buried six feet underground," he growled, "Blair and our children are the only family I have. Somehow I have to set things right with her."

"I wasn't talking about Evelyn," Serena shook her head. "And Blair and your children are your family, yes. But they are not the only family you have. In case you've forgotten, Mom and I both had the crap scared out of us last summer when we got a call saying that your identification was found on a dead body. And while Eric may have been slow to come around after the whole Jenny thing, you are still the coolest big brother he has."

"I'm not sure he would agree with that assessment," Chuck rolled his eyes.

"I am," Serena said. "You've never made him uncomfortable about his orientation. In fact, given the opportunity, you'd probably take him someplace he could meet guys. Somehow, I can't see Dan doing that."

"Humphrey?" Chuck snorted, "Like he has any taste in men."

"I'm being serious, Chuck," Serena scolded him.

"Yes, I know," Chuck said. "Thank you, Sis."

"Anytime, Chuck," Serena smiled.

The doctor came out moments later and updated the pair on Blair's treatment.

"Can we see her?" Serena inquired as she looked in to see Blair asleep once more.

"As long as you keep her calm," the doctor nodded.

"That leaves me out," Chuck responded as his face fell.

"I promise," Serena said as she glanced at Chuck.

The doctor left them alone and Serena faced Chuck.

"I know what you're going to say," Chuck said.

"No, you don't," Serena sighed.

"Stay out here," Chuck guessed.

"Actually, I was going to say, come with me," Serena told him as she held out her hand to him and pulled him into Blair's room. Chuck's eyes went wide in surprise. He could believe she was inviting him into Blair's room

"You better stay back," she cautioned.

Chuck nodded and leaned against the wall as Serena approached Blair. "B? It's Serena. Can you hear me?"

"Sleepy," she mumbled.

"I know," Serena smiled. "I'm sorry about before."

"S'okay," she slurred a little. "He here?"

Serena looked over her shoulder and then back at her friend, "Yeah, he's around. He's keeping his distance because he doesn't want you anymore upset than you were."

"You stay," Blair half-ordered.

"Of course, B," Serena promised.


	12. Chapter 12

Thank you all who replied last time and major thanks to my beta. I hope everyone enjoys this chapter. To my newest fan Kou Shun'u I think any woman who could con her own flesh and blood doesn't deserve the title mother so as far as I'm concerned Evelyn is dead.

Happy Reading everyone!

Chuck sat at the counter in Blair's café. Serena had kicked him out of the hospital about an hour ago, saying that he looked like crap and needed to sleep, eat, and 'for the love of god, please take a shower'. So, he'd come back to Blair's apartment. He'd taken a shower and changed into the clothes Nate had had sent from the penthouse for him. He'd eaten the food one of Blair's waitresses had put in front of him before she'd left, locking the door behind her. But it was the sleep part that Chuck didn't want to attempt right now. He was afraid to close his eyes. He knew when he did, he'd replay what had happened to Blair, and he didn't want to imagine her lying on the ground bleeding while her mother lay dead a foot away.

"Hey, what are you doing down here," Nate said from the kitchen door. He'd come down to get a little late night snack and saw Chuck sitting, mostly in the dark.

"What are you doing down here? You're supposed to be upstairs with-" Chuck trailed off when Nate waved a baby monitor in response. "Doors?"

"Locked," Nate nodded as he came into the café and sat on the stool next to him facing the café. He looked at his friend, "Talk to me, Man."

"Serena kicked me out. What happened to you two switching places?"

"When she called to tell me Blair was awake, we decided to switch tomorrow. I'll be there to keep the peace between you and Harold, and she'll be here taking care of your kids and this place."

"I think Harold and I will be okay. I have to say, your girlfriend really surprised me today."

"Yeah? How," Nate asked curiously. He smiled as the word 'girlfriend' was tossed out. They hadn't really discussed it, but it felt as if they were headed in that direction again.

"Do you remember Easter when we were about eight?"

Nate thought and nodded his head, "We were all at the Waldorf's for dinner." They'd spent nearly every holiday at the Waldorf's, so it had hadn't required much thought.

"Remember just before dinner all those fights broke out. It was like a ripple effect or something. One minute everyone's fine and getting along and the next-"

"Everyone's screaming at each other," Nate finished. "I remember standing in the hall with you guys and Eric, watching all the adults fight. It was insane and a little scary."

"But not half as scary as when Blair's grandma walked down the dining room table and shouted 'That will be quite enough', in this commanding voice that you really wouldn't have expected such a small woman to have."

Nate laughed, remembering Blair's grandmother standing on top of the dining room table yelling at all the adults. He looked at Chuck, "But what does that have to do with Serena?"

"Well, today when Serena got to the hospital, Harold and I were having a fight of our own. Serena heard us and came in. Harold and I didn't even notice she was there until she got up on the coffee table and said 'That will be quite enough'," Chuck smiled.

"You're kidding," Nate laughed.

"No. She then proceeded to lay into me and Harold. I believe the words 'most selfish people on earth' were bandied about. She was right," Chuck admitted grudgingly.

"She's worried about you," Nate told him.

"I know," Chuck nodded. "So, I hear you and she have finally gotten your acts together at the same time."

"I had a feeling you were the one that filled her in on my secret," Nate raised an eyebrow at his friend.

"Yes, I did," Chuck admitted. "It's stupid to waste whatever time you have with someone being angry."

"Tomorrow is not guaranteed," Nate echoed Chuck's words to Serena.

"No, it's not."

"I called my dad," Nate told him.

"How is he," Chuck asked curiously. Their fathers had been a sticky subject with him and Nate since Howard had gone to jail and Bart had died.

"He's okay. He said to tell you he hopes Blair pulls through and that when we speak to Cyrus we should pass along his condolences. He thought a lot of Eleanor."

"How's Anne?"

"I think she was in shock. Apparently, I forgot to mention Blair was pregnant when she disappeared."

Chuck stared at his best friend, "What?"

"I wasn't really thinking clearly. First there was me trying to prove that I was over Serena-"

"Which you weren't," Chuck interjected.

"Then there was me trying to make it work with Juliet-"

"Who turned out to be a little bit psycho."

"Yes, thanks for bringing that up. Then there was the Jenny thing and me and Juliet breaking up and now this mess. I'm on information overload. I can't imagine what my mom would do if she knew the entire story."

"Did you mention that you and Serena were back together?"

"I told her we were talking about it."

"You lied."

"I temporarily bent the truth. You know Mom's not all that crazy about Serena," Nate defended himself. He frowned at Chuck's smirk. "I can't wait for Sabrina to bring home a guy for the first time. You'll try to lock her in her room 'til she's thirty."

"Forty and if she's anything like her mother, forty five," Chuck replied as the panic set in. What if she fell in love with someone like himself? He realized he could never allow her to leave the house.

"And then there's the chance that she'll fall for Dan's kid," Nate smirked.

"Over my dead body," Chuck said.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair's eyes opened slowly and blinked as the room around her came into focus. She smiled slightly when she spotted Serena in the chair beside her bed, asleep. The pink peonies were still on her bedside table as her smile involuntary widened.

He'd come for her.

"Blair," Serena said quietly. "Good morning," she said, groaning at the stiff muscle ache from having slept in the uncomfortable chair all night.

"I'd offer to share the painkillers, but I'm rather enjoying the psychedelic colors," Blair told her.

"Funny," Serena said sarcastically. "How do you feel?"

"Kind of loopy," Blair said. "I wonder if this is what having an acid flashback feels like."

"If you share, I can let you know. I've had a few in my day," Serena tried to joke.

"Too soon," Blair stated as she winced in discomfort.

"Right," Serena nodded. "So, what do you remember?"

"Nothing," Blair admitted.

Serena nodded, "Okay. Do you have any questions for me?"

"Do I even want to know the details?" Blair inquired.

"Maybe not yet. The doctors said you're still pretty fragile."

"I hate that term," Blair groaned.

"That bullet was way too close to your heart, B," Serena reminded her. "You scared us all."

"Us," Blair prompted her to elaborate.

"Well, to begin with Dan. He found you bleeding on the floor. He pretty much saved your life. Then there was Rufus, Mom, Eric, and me. Then your dad, Chuck, and Nate."

"Is Daddy here?" Blair asked hopefully. "I want to see him."

"He and Roman went to a hotel," Serena told her. "They should be back in a little while."

"Good," Blair nodded. "Where's Nate?"

"At the apartment taking care of your kids," Serena filled her in.

"You left Nate alone with my babies? Have you lost your mind? He has no clue how to take care of an infant."

"He's not completely alone. Mrs. Katz, Dan, and Chuck are there too. And he's better with Sabrina and Sebastian than I am, which isn't saying much, but we both know Chuck will be hovering over him."

"And what the hell does Chuck know about taking care of a baby," Blair snapped.

"Will you relax, we have everything under control," Serena assured her. "Dan will make sure that Nate and Chuck don't dive in too deep. Which brings me to my question, are you going to see him?"

"Dan, sure why not," Blair replied, knowing full well that wasn't who Serena was referring to.

"No, not Dan," Serena shook her head. "Chuck. He wants to see you."

"No," Blair shook her head as vigorously as she dared. "What part of 'I never want to see him' do you not understand?"

"The part where he loves you, he's been worried sick about you, and I had to threaten him with bodily harm to get him to leave the hospital last night. Come on, B, you almost died," Serena reminded her.

"I can't see him," Blair stated tearfully. "Sooner or later he's going to get bored and move on, leaving me with just our children to remember him by. If the separation is on my terms, it's easier to deal with."

"Really? Is that why you were crying when I gave you his Valentine's Day gift? Blair, Chuck isn't going to get bored and leave. He will stay with you forever and you know it."

"No, he won't," Blair held firm as tears streamed down her cheeks, "Sooner or later everyone leaves me . . . first Daddy, then you, then Nate. Chuck will be no different, and I cannot bear to be the reason that he is driven away."

"But you are the reason he's being driven away," Serena insisted, "He wants to be here. He wants to hold your hand and beg for forgiveness, but you won't let him."

"I just can't," Blair continued to hold firm.

"God, you are quite possibly the most stubborn person I have ever met," Serena growled.

"Call me what you will. I'm still not seeing him."

"Yes, you are," Serena said. "You are and you will. You need to see him. He needs to see you. I'm sick of seeing my best friend and my brother so miserable."

"So what are you going to do," Blair challenged her, "Bring him in here while I'm convalescing and unable to move. That's low even for you."

"What are you going to do," Serena snapped. "Are you going to keep playing hide and seek for the rest of your life? For the rest of your children's lives?"

"I hate you," Blair told her.

"No you don't," Serena smiled.

"No, I think I really do this time, because this time you have a point," Blair snarled.

"I know," Serena said. "So, when should I tell him to come?"

"I want some decent clothes and to wash my hair," Blair said.

"Is that some sort of negotiation ploy?" Serena chuckled, "Because that's really easy to manage, especially for one Chuck Bass."

"No, I just want to look halfway normal when I see him."

"You want to look less helpless when going up against the big bad Bass," Serena guessed.

"Something like that," Blair replied, "I don't want him to think I'm as fragile as you think I am."

"I don't think you're emotionally fragile," Serena said. "But I do know that you're physically fragile. I was there when your doctor told us how close you came to bleeding out all over the floor of the café."

"I don't want to be physically or emotionally fragile when I see Chuck," Blair told her, "Perhaps this encounter can wait a few days." She was delaying the inevitable in hopes Serena would take pity on her in a few days and back off this idea all together.

Serena got out of the chair, "Nice try. I'm gonna call Nate and get him to bring you some clothes and stuff. Then I'll talk to Chuck."

Serena was out the door before Blair could say anything more to try and dissuade her.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck walked down the hallway towards Blair's room. To say he was nervous would be a vast understatement. Those butterflies that had taken up residence in his stomach after the first time he and Blair slept together now had wingspans that rivaled pterodactyls and they were going warp speed in his stomach. His mouth was dry and he was pretty sure his palms were sweaty.

Dear God, he was a wreck.

He reached Blair's door and took a deep breath before he knocked.

"_Come in,"_ Blair answered from the other side.

Chuck pushed the door open and walked in. Blair was sitting up in bed wearing a plaid printed, button down the front shirt. He spied a camisole underneath and her hair was pulled back from her face. She looked up at him and managed a small smile.

His breath caught at the sight before him. Just hours removed from major surgery, she was still as beautiful as ever.

"Hi," she said quietly.

"Hi," he replied as he found himself frozen in the doorway.

"Coming in," she asked.

"Yes," Chuck nodded as he stepped into the room. "How are you?"

"Lucky to be alive from what I hear," Blair tried to lighten the tense mood.

"That's not funny," Chuck shook his head.

"How are you," Blair turned the conversation around.

"I'm glad to see that you're on your way to recovery," Chuck told her as he eyed her hand. He wanted to touch her, to feel her familiar warmth, but Serena had specifically warned him against that. They sat in uncomfortable silence for a moment before he settled on a topic that they could perhaps get through without too much shouting. "I met our children."

"I figured," Blair nodded. "I can't tell you how many times I've looked at Sebastian and seen you looking back at me."

"That's how I feel when I look at Sabrina," Chuck admitted. "I have this incredible urge to lock her in her room whenever I think about her going out with someone like me."

"Don't worry," Blair told him. "I've already started laying the groundwork for that."

"Really? How?"

"Every night before I put her to bed, I whisper 'Limos are bad' to her," Blair smiled.

Chuck laughed in response. "And I'd be telling her how good they are because my limo brought me to you."

"Maybe we shouldn't go down that road," Blair said. "At least not right now."

"Blair, I am truly sorry for everything I put you through.

"There are so many mistakes that I made that I wish I could take back. I hurt you in a hundred different ways, and I wish I could go back and undo every last one of them. Even with my money, there is still not enough money in the world for me to travel back in time, so I have to start from this very moment. I need you to know that I will do whatever it takes to fix this."

"I don't know if you can fix this," Blair responded softly as she felt the tears forming in her eyes.

"Please don't say that," Chuck said softly as he felt his own tears start to form. "There has to be a way to fix this."

"I will never hold what happened with Jenny against you in any way ever again," Blair told him. "Dan's a friend and Jenny deserves post-mortem respect even though she never got any when she was alive. Jack doesn't get that consideration."

"Are you saying nothing I can do can fix what I tried to get you to do with Jack?" Chuck asked as a rogue tear escaped.

"You traded me to your uncle for some stupid piece of real estate," she snarled. "In what world do you know of where that deserves any level of forgiveness?"

"In the world where we love each other," Chuck told her. "And don't bother trying to tell me you don't love me anymore. I saw your face that day you spotted me in Paris. I know you better than you like to acknowledge. If I didn't mean anything to you anymore you would've stayed in New York and gone after me for sole custody.

"Besides you aren't exactly a saint in all this. Like it or not, when you didn't think I knew, you were going to follow through with Jack and never tell me. Then you ran off while pregnant with my children and kept them from me for how many months."

"Don't turn this around on me," she growled, "What I did was completely different."

"How?"

"I did what I did for self-preservation. You did what you did for yourself."

"You ran away to hurt me. You kept my children from me again to hurt me," he told her with a startling calmness. "Spin it however you like but your primary motivation was to hurt me as deeply as I hurt you. You know better than anyone how much I've longed to be a part of a real family."

Blair shook her head, "You don't get to lecture me about hurting people or running away. You may be better at it than I am, but you don't get to lecture me about it."

"Maybe forgiveness right now is asking for too much," he rationalized. "We both are hurting because of what the other has done. We can try to play the 'my pain is bigger than your pain', but we're just going to spin ourselves dizzy. Maybe we have to put that aside and try to find some solid ground to stand on. We have the two most beautiful children to think about. They deserve parents that can stand being in the same room together."

Blair looked down at her hands, "I don't know how to do this with you. I don't know how to be in the same room as you without hurting. I was fine until this happened. We were fine."

"I wasn't," Chuck told her. "I couldn't sleep or eat. I hated the sight of any and all family I saw on the street. Flowers made me want to vomit. The only thing that made me happy was looking at a picture of you or our children."

"I guess I wasn't doing that well either," she admitted reluctantly as she continued to inspect her hands as if they were the most fascinating things in the world only so she could avoid looking at him. This wasn't the time to put up a brave face. It was time to be real. "I had other things to focus on, but you were always in my thoughts. I picked up the phone to call you about five times a day. When Sebastian smiled for the first time, I broke down in the most painful sobs because he looked that much more like you."

Chuck fought the urge to hold her hand in his as he watched her watching her hands, "Blair, we need to fix this. I know it's not going to be easy but I'm not giving up. You have my heart. You have since we were children. I don't want it back even if you want to give it back to me. It's non-refundable."

"I don't know how we're going to do this," she responded as she shook her head slightly.

"Do you love me?" he asked simply.

"I do. I probably always will. That's not the problem. I don't know if I'll ever trust you again."

"That is something we can work on. As long as I know you still love me," he told her with a soft smile.

"Where do we go from here?" she asked as she wiped a tear from her cheek.

"We go home when you're ready," Chuck told her. "For now, you just focus on getting well. We'll wait for everything else."

"Chuck Bass is going to wait for a girl."

"Not a girl," he shook his head. "The girl."

Whatever else would've been said was lost as Harold entered the room.

"Daddy," Blair smiled happily.

"Blair-Bear," Harold grinned widely as he presented her with a token teddy bear he picked up at the hospital gift shop.

"Aw," Blair smiled again. "Thank you. Is Roman with you?"

"He'll be along tomorrow," Harold nodded. "He wanted to get you something a little more special."

"He doesn't have to," Blair yawned. "Sorry. I think this might be a short visit. A nurse was in before Chuck arrived. She might have given me pain medication. It makes me loopy and causes me to fall asleep faster than Serena did during freshman history."

Chuck snorted out a laugh.

"That's okay, Sweetheart," Harold assured her. "Sleep as much as you need. I'll be in the waiting room if you need me."

"Stay until I fall asleep," Blair requested.

"Of course."

"I should be going," Chuck said. "We'll talk more tomorrow, alright?"

Blair nodded, "Goodnight Chuck."

"Sleep well, Beautiful," he smiled as he gave her a little wave. He wanted to kiss her goodbye, but he didn't want to erase what little progress they made with their talk.

"Kiss our children for me," she told him.

He stopped and looked at her. Then he nodded, "I will."

After Chuck left, Blair looked at Harold, "Thank you for being here. I know how much I must have scared everyone when I disappeared."

"That is unimportant right now," Harold told her as he kissed her hand gently. "What is important is that you're here. You're getting well, and soon you'll be able to come home which is good because your family needs you."

Blair nodded as she leaned back against the pillows, "I know. Have you met your grandchildren yet?"

"Tonight. I'm going to your place once Nate gets here."

"I don't need people to sit with me around the clock," Blair protested sleepily. She was fighting a war with her eyelids. There was something in the back of her mind that wouldn't let her relax.

"Get some sleep," he urged her, "You may not need people around you twenty-four hours a day, but right now we need to be around you. We all missed you so very much."

Blair nodded as her eyelids drifted closed one final time.

Harold kissed her forehead and sat down beside her bed with her hand in his. Sighing, he thought of the news that would come once she was well enough.

Eleanor had been a good woman. He may not have been in love with her, but he did love her. He was dreading the final goodbye that was coming up faster than he could imagine. But he had a feeling that if there was a higher power, she'd convinced him to spare their daughter. Eleanor was like that.

He knew his daughter and ex-wife's relationship had been strained at times, but they'd been in a fairly good place before Blair's life spiraled when she found out she was pregnant and felt the need to disappear. She'd been so worried about what Eleanor would think of her when she found out she was pregnant out of wedlock.

Eleanor had surprised him. She hadn't cared one wit about her society friends or what the gossip rags would print, she only wanted to find her daughter to ensure her safety.

Then of course, she wanted to meet her grandchildren.

Harold knew that had never happened. He hadn't heard anything but he assumed that there was no sign of the shooter and since Blair had no recollection of the events at the moment, the police had been keeping their distance. Which was more than he could say for the media. They were of course banned from the hospital but that wasn't the case where the penthouse was concerned. Cyrus had told him that there were reporters everywhere and that once Dorota had calmed down she'd loaded an antique shotgun that had been Eleanor's great-grandfather's and stationed herself in the lobby of the building where the Waldorf penthouse was. Anyone who wasn't invited or known to the residents of the building got a ten second head start.

He didn't know how he was going to break the news to his little girl that her mother was gone. He didn't even know when would be an appropriate time to do so. The doctors had warned anyone entering her room to keep her stress to a minimum. He knew from the puffiness of her eyes, that the conversation with Chuck had been any but stress free, but they must have found some neutral ground because they hadn't been shouted at each other when he'd arrived as he expected.

Knock-knock

Harold turned around and smiled when he saw Nate poking his head in.

"Nathaniel," Harold greeted as he stood up.

"How are you, Mr. Waldorf," Nate asked.

"It's Harold," the older man said. "And I'm doing as well as can be expected."

"Right. Chuck's waiting in the car for you. He's going to ride with you back to the apartment."

"Don't strangle him, Daddy," Blair warned him as she woke up only slightly at Nate's words. "You may not have much civilized to say to him right now, but he is the father of your grandchildren."

"Thought you were sleeping," Harold told her.

"Behave," she warned him as she yawned widely and promptly fell back to sleep.

"You sure you wouldn't rather me stay here," Harold asked Nate.

"I'll be fine," Nate assured him. "I've got some magazines and I'll turn the TV on low."

"If she wakes up and starts asking questions, keep her calm until I can get back here. She shouldn't hear this news from anyone but me," Harold instructed him.

"Agreed," Nate nodded.

"Good night, Nate."

"Good night," Nate nodded as he sat down and Harold left the room.

-x-x-x-x-

Blair's mind wouldn't shut off even in sleep. Everyone had been there today.

Serena, Nate, Chuck, her father. But someone was missing, she realized, someone she wanted to see and someone who should want to see her.

"Mother," she mumbled in her sleep as the memories from what happened in her cafe began replaying in her mind.

Nate looked up in surprise. Had Blair just said-

"Mom!"

Blair's eyes opened wide with terror as they locked with Nate's. "Where's my mom?"

"Let me call your dad," Nate picked up the phone and started to dial.

Blair's hand covered his, "Where's my mom?"

"Blair, I . . ." his voice faded as he couldn't find the words to explain what had happened.

"She's gone, isn't she," Blair cried out as the emotional pain overtook her instantly. The nightmare had been real. Her mother was shot, just before she was only she hadn't pulled through.

Nate got up from his chair and sat on the bed with Blair. He hugged her to him and rocked her gently, "I'm so sorry Blair. You don't know how sorry."

"Oh, god," she cried into his chest as the sobs came with no end in sight.

She wasn't sure which her worse, the pain in her chest from the bullet wound, or the whole in her heart from losing her mother.

"Blair, you have to calm down. You're going to pull a stitch," Nate tried to calm her. "If that happens, I don't think Chuck or Serena will ever forgive me."

"I w-want Chuck."


	13. Chapter 13

Thank you for all the replies. Kaela097 my splendorific beta, you rock as my editor and a writer. For all those who haven't listened to me yet, go read her stories!

Enjoy!

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Chapter 13

Chuck ran down the hall towards Blair's room. He was vaguely aware of people telling him to slow down and that Harold was behind him but all he could hear was Nate's voice echoing in his head.

_Get down here. _

That had been Nate's only explanation to him when Chuck had picked up the phone at Blair's apartment.

Please let her be okay, he prayed as he turned the corner and saw Nate leaning against the wall opposite Blair's room.

"Nathaniel," Chuck shouted down the hall.

Nate pushed himself off the wall and stood in the hallway.

"What happened?"

"Where's Harold," Nate asked.

"He's coming," Chuck motioned behind him. "Blair. Right now."

"She had a nightmare and when she woke up, she asked me where her mom was."

"And," Harold asked as he finally caught up.

"I tried to call you before I told her anything, Harold," Nate said. "She wouldn't let me. I'm sorry."

"She knows," Chuck concluded.

"Yeah. The doctor's in with her now. She was half hysterical. I wanted to make sure she didn't pull a stitch or anything."

"I'm going to call Serena," Harold said. "She's probably jumping out of her skin."

"There's a balcony at the end of the hall, I'll be there in a minute," Nate pointed. "I want to talk to Serena, too."

Harold walked back down the way he came and Nate turned to Chuck, you looked like he'd seen a ghost as he was as pale as Nate had ever seen him, "You okay?"

"You scared the hell out of me," Chuck growled at him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to go into it over the phone."

"Next time make sure the words 'she's alive' enter the conversation," Chuck told him.

Nate nodded. "I called you for an important reason."

"To take ten years off my life," he guessed.

"She asked for you," Nate told him.

"What?" Chuck stared at him, his eyes wide in surprise.

"After I told her, when I was trying to calm her down, she told me she wanted you," Nate said. "So, you gonna stay out here and lecture me or are you gonna go in there and be with her?"

Chuck shook his hand and nodded, "Thank you. Go talk to your girl."

"Go talk to yours," Nate shot back with a wink before he walked after Harold.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Chuck entered Blair's room as the doctor was leaving. He saw her curled up under the covers by the edge of the bed, her brown curls somewhat matted to her face by her tears. Knowing how upset she was he approached her cautiously. The chair Nate had been sitting in was pulled close to the bed, probably so that he could talk to her in low tones while she calmed down. Chuck sat down next to her.

"Blair," he reached out and pushed some of her hair away from her face. "Can you hear me?"

"Chuck?" she moaned as she reached for his hand instantly without opening her eyes as if it were her lifeline.

"I'm right here, Beautiful."

"My mom," she said in a heartbreakingly quiet voice as she gripped his hand in hers and rested them both on the mattress near her chest. She still hadn't opened her eyes.

"I know," he whispered as he caressed her cheek softly, wiping away the tears that had begun to fall again.

"She didn't even get to meet her grandchildren."

"But she'll be watching over them along with my mother," he told her gently. It was the only thing he could think of to say at the moment. He didn't know if it would be a comfort to her or not, but it was the best he had.

Blair's eyes finally opened and she looked at him, "Do you really believe in things like that?"

"Children change your perspective on a lot of things," he told her. "And when you're with me, I can believe anything."

"I almost wasn't with you. If that bullet-"

"Don't," he said. "Don't say it. I don't ever want to think about 'what almost' or 'what could have happened' again. You're here. That's all that matters."

"I don't know how to get through this. I'm not strong enough," she let out a heartbreaking sob.

"Yes, you are," he told her adamantly. "You were strong enough to start your own business while you were pregnant with twins. You were strong enough to get me through the worst time in my life. Don't ever think you're not strong enough."

"I'm not," she shook her head. "I can't do this anymore."

"Yes, you can," he held firm. "And you will. Sabrina and Sebastian need you. I need you."

"I hate this feeling," Blair admitted. "I hate knowing she's never coming back, Chuck."

"I know," Chuck said brushing a kiss across her forehead. "I am so sorry."

"Does this pain ever go away?"

"Not completely," he told her honestly, "But you find a way through it. And if you're lucky enough, like I was, there is a light at the end of the tunnel guiding your way."

He paused for a few moments before he added, "I'll be that for you if you can let me."

Blair closed her eyes, "She was on your side you know."

"What?"

"My mom," Blair opened her eyes again. "She was on your side. She thought I should take them and come home or at least tell you where I was."

"Only because I asked her to," Chuck replied, "She wants you to be happy. Somehow I was able to convince her that I could make you happy despite what I've put you through."

"I think it was more than that. She was very insistent that children should have two parents."

"They'll have two parents," he assured her.

"I know," Blair said. "Serena's been telling me since I told her I was pregnant that once I told you I wouldn't be able to get rid of you no matter how much I said I wanted to."

"She's smarter than she looks," he chuckled slightly.

"It's weird isn't it? We were both shot before our children were a year old," she watched him carefully. His eyes spoke the question as to how she could have known. "Dan let it slip when we were cleaning up one night."

"I'm fully healed," he told her, "And you will be soon enough."

"Would you have ever told me," she asked. "If this hadn't happened and I just came back one day, would you have told me?"

"When we found our way back to each other, yes I would have told you. Eventually I'll tell you the entire story."

"Entire story?" she repeated in confusion.

He hesitated. She deserved to know how he was shot, what he'd been fighting to hold on to, but nobody, not even Nate knew that part of the story.

"Not tonight, okay," he said gently. "When you're well, I'll tell you."

"Okay," Blair nodded. "What else did my mother say to you?"

"She said you loved me."

"Has that fact ever been in doubt?"

"Every once in a while," Chuck admitted.

"No," Blair shook her head. "I may not have always liked you in the last few years, but I haven't stopped loving you."

"Good to know," Chuck smiled.

"Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?" she requested.

"Of course," he nodded.

"Thanks for coming," she said closing her eyes.

"You're more than welcome."

"Talk to me about your first meeting with our children. Your voice will keep me calm and should help me fall asleep. "

"Okay," Chuck smiled. "Well, it happened the night after your surgery. Serena and Nate dragged me out of the hospital and back to your place. After Serena sent the baby-sitter home she took my hand and pulled me down the hall because she said the meeting was long overdue. I didn't want to do it yet-"

"Why not," Blair interrupted sleepily.

"Because I wanted to wait for you," Chuck told her. "I wanted it to be your decision."

"I would have brought you to them the moment you found me," she told him. "You deserve that."

"Thank you," he told her. "Where was I?"

"Serena was dragging you down the hall," Blair told him.

"Perhaps drag is a strong word," Chuck interrupted.

"Okay, she was pulling you down the hall," Blair said.

"That's better. She pulled me down the hall into the nursery and introduced me to your children."

"Our children," she corrected him.

"Our children," he agreed softly. "Is this helping you fall asleep? You seem pretty awake to me."

"It is," she nodded slightly.

"The moment I set my eyes on Sabrina, I smiled for perhaps the first time in months. She is the most beautiful little thing I've ever seen."

"Little boys are already staring at her," she smiled. "Her social calendar is going to be filled."

"Over my dead body," Chuck said. "Maybe I should start telling her 'limos are bad'."

"And Sebastian," she prompted him, "What did you think when you saw him for the first time?"

"We are going to have so much trouble when he hits his teens. I can see in his eyes he has my mischievous streak."

"Is that what you're calling it?" Blair laughed.

"You have no idea how much I missed hearing that," Chuck smiled as he closed his eyes to savor the sound. "I hope Sabrina has that."

"She does," Blair nodded. "She has the most adorable giggle."

"Do you know when I loved hearing that giggle the most?"

"If your answer has anything to do with a limo ride during our junior year, I don't want to hear it."

"No. It was after we graduated from high school. You giggled when I started to repeatedly tell you I loved you."

"It took us so long to get to that place. Can we ever get back there?"

"We'll certainly try," he told her.

"We're better together than we are apart."

"I've always thought so," Chuck smiled at her. "I held them. They are the warmest and most cuddly little people. I never wanted to let them go."

Blair smiled. "I need you to do something for me."

"Anything."

"When we b-bury my mom, will you hold my hand?"

"Always," he nodded as he kissed her hand softly.

"Thank you," she sighed as her body finally relaxed enough for her to fall asleep.

"Sleep well," he whispered as he continued to caress her hand rhythmically and lulled her into a deeper slumber.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck stuck his head into Blair's room and smiled, "Sorry, I thought I'd be back before you woke up."

Blair smiled tiredly at him, "It's okay. I figured you went to get something to eat."

"I did. The café serves a good breakfast."

"You went to my café," Blair raised an eyebrow.

"Actually I went to your apartment and Serena insisted on us eating together before I came back."

"Oh," Blair frowned at him. "Are you going to stand there all day or are you coming in?"

"Close your eyes," he told her.

"What?"

"Just close your eyes," he reiterated.

"Why?"

"It's a surprise," he told her. "You'll love it, I promise."

Blair gave him a suspicious look but closed her eyes, "You know it's not nice to tease heart patients."

"Amusing," he stated dryly.

Blair heard the door open wider and then click close. She heard Chuck moving around and then she felt something placed on her lap and then the bed dipped a moment later.

"Okay, open your eyes," he told her.

Blair opened up her eyes and gasped happily. Sabrina was sitting on her lap looking at her mother with adoring eyes and Chuck sat on the edge of the bed holding Sebastian.

"Oh my god. How? I thought children weren't allowed in here," she asked as she put her arms around her daughter, not daring to lift her just yet.

"I told your doctor it might help with your recovery, and he gave us twenty minutes," Chuck explained. "You can hold them but-"

"I know. I can't lift them yet," she said. "I think this may be your best surprise ever, Bass."

"I don't think it beats the one I got this morning."

"What do you mean?"

"I was helping Serena get you some more pajamas and things and I opened the drawer under your bed."

Blair froze for a second and then looked at him, "You found the Erickson Beamon necklace?"

"I did. I'm surprised you didn't throw it into the river or leave it as a parting gift for me."

"I wanted our daughter to know what wonderful taste her father had."

"You were that sure it was a girl?"

"Oh yes," Blair nodded.

"Why?"

"After all the misery and sleepless nights you gave the fathers of the Upper East Side, to have a daughter would be the only truly fitting punishment. Right Sabrina," she cooed to her daughter. "Now Daddy gets to worry about you."

"And how do you explain Sebastian?"

"Over zealous sperm," Blair smiled. "Besides, twins run in my family. Every couple of generations, a set of twins happens."

"Yes, your mom told me your great-grandmother was a twin."

"I see you and she had a rather in-depth talk," Blair said.

"I'm sure she felt sorry for me," Chuck said. "I looked like hell when Eleanor first came to see me after you left."

Blair nodded and then looked at him, "Did you sleep last night or did you stay up all night watching me sleep?"

"Why?"

"Because you have lines under your eyes and I'm about to ring the front desk to pick up the bags that have collected with them," Blair nailed him with a look as he avoided her eyes by playing with Sebastian. She carefully leaned over and put her hand on his knee. "Hey. Please tell me you're sleeping."

"I'm sleeping," he said dutifully.

"Okay, now I know you're not sleeping. You can't even lie decently."

"I've had some things on my mind," he said quietly.

Blair didn't know how to respond to that so she scooted closer and took Chuck's hand while he anchored Sebastian to him and looked at her in confusion. She put his hand over her heart, "I'm here."

"Blair-"

"No. You said last night you didn't want to think about what almost or could have happened."

"It's not as easy to keep things away from your mind when you're sleeping," he told her as he felt the steady beating of her heart.

"I know," she nodded. "But I am here. Talk to me."

"About what?"

"Anything. Why don't we start with what's bothering you? Tell me what's keeping you awake at night."

"It will sound stupid," Chuck mumbled.

"Tell me anyway," Blair encouraged.

"I don't want to sleep because I know I'll see what happened to you," he admitted.

"But when you're awake you can see that I'm getting better," she told him as she squeezed his hand.

"And when I go to sleep the fact that I very nearly lost you forever seeps in and plays with my mind."

"How can I help?" she offered.

"Don't get shot again," he told her.

"Don't worry. That is not an experience I'm looking to repeat. But what I mean is how can I help you sleep?"

"I don't know," Chuck shook his head.

"Chuck, our children need one fully functioning parent right now. I'm in here, so that means you have to do it. But in order to be a functioning parent, you need sleep."

"I'll do my best," Chuck nodded.


	14. Chapter 14

Kinda skimpy on the replies last time. I am currently watching Gossip Girl and I gotta say, I'm liking Serena right now. Thanks to my beta. Reply!

Chapter 14

Blair's eyes opened slowly. She smiled when she noticed the rays of sun starting to stream through her window. She could almost smell the start of spring in the air. Turning to see who'd spent the night at her bedside she raised an eyebrow in confusion to see Eric.

"Eric," she said softly so she didn't startle him out of his sleep.

The younger boy's eyes opened slowly and he smiled at her, "Morning."

"What are you doing here?"

"Well, last night I was there when Serena, Nate, and Chuck were arguing about who was going to spend the night here with you. They all had those scary faces they make when they don't get enough sleep, so I volunteered to stay with you."

"Why? I would've been okay by myself."

"I know that and you know that but try telling the other three members of the Non-Judging Breakfast Club that. I wouldn't be surprised if all three of them stayed with you given the opportunity."

"Well, I won't be bound by the rules of this fine institution for much longer," Blair smiled cheerfully. "I get released today."

"I know. Any ideas as to where you'll be staying as you recover?"

"Well, I have been told I need to take it easy so that means I can't go back to work right away. For some reason that means I can't go back to my apartment."

"You know my mom would take you in a second," Eric smiled.

"Of course, she would," Blair nodded, "But she and Rufus have enough going on right now. They don't need to be taking care of two infants and a recovering gunshot victim."

"Survivor," Eric corrects her.

"Survivor," Blair conceded.

"You have never been a victim."

"Thank you. But, I can't force my presence on a grieving man especially given the way Jenny and I felt about one another. I can just go to the penthouse. Dorota can take care of us."

"What about her family?" Eric inquired, "Vanya and Ana? Are you sure Dorota can handle three children at once?"

"Perhaps not," Blair frowned. "Are we sure I can't just go back to my apartment?"

"Positive," Eric said. "We know you Blair. You won't take it easy if you're anywhere near your house. You'll be going down to the cafe to make sure Dan's doing things right."

"I'll just hire myself a nurse and nanny then," Blair shrugged.

"And stay where," Eric asked.

"Waldorf penthouse. Dorota can help me get settled and she can take care of the normal stuff while the nanny and the nurse help out with everything else."

"What about Chuck?" Eric suggested, "Sabrina and Sebastian are his children. Granted he's new at it, but he's doing well with them considering the crash course on babies he's taking."

"No," Blair shook her head. "We're not at that place yet. He'll feel obligated, and I don't want that."

"Obligated? Really? Blair, you've been as much a sister to me as Serena has since I was about four. I spent more time in your house than my own when my mother was going through her marriages so I feel comfortable in telling you that you're crazy if you think Chuck Bass sees you as an obligation of any kind. He is ass backwards in love with you. He has been for as long as I've known him."

"Perhaps if he suggested it, I'd consider it," Blair conceded, "But don't you even think about putting the thought into his head. I'll crush you van der Woodsen. Gunshot or not, you know I could do it."

"If he suggests it, it will be his idea," Eric assured her. "I don't meddle unlike my bubbling blonde older sister."

Blair smiled at him, "How are you Eric? I know how much Jenny meant to you as a friend and a sister. Fight or not, I know you must be hurting."

"It does," he nodded as the sadness filled his eyes before he put his head down. "She was my best friend for the longest time, but she'd changed so much in the last year or so. It was hard to even recognize her anymore. I just wish we'd been in a better place before she died. We weren't even speaking. I wish I had a little closure."

Blair reached out and put her hand on his, "That sibling thing you feel for me goes both ways you know. You ever need a sister other than Serena to talk to, you know where to find me. I hope you know that. Now that everyone knows where I am, I expect you to be my children's favorite uncle."

"I'll happily play the part," Eric smiled slightly. "They are adorable. If you ever need a babysitter for the night, I'd love to offer my services. Though I might require reinforcements. There are two of them and only one of me."

"I know exactly how you feel," Blair laughed. "They always have me outnumbered and running ragged."

"Now that we know where you are, you have a few more people to help out," Eric said. "And I love the cafe. I spent yesterday helping Dan with the night shift before I came here. I think I poured four pots of that Kona you sell in under an hour."

"Yeah the college kids like that when they have finals, midterms, or term papers," Blair nodded. "I never really realized how many people we have in our life that are so willing to roll up their sleeves and help out. Perhaps leaving Manhattan wasn't as necessary as I thought."

"It certainly would have saved Chuck a lot of heartache," Eric stated, "I'd never seen him as devastated as he was in your absence. We were all a little fearful as to what he might do if he hadn't found you when he did."

"What does that mean, Eric?" she asked as a sense of dread settled into the pit of her stomach.

"He got drunk a lot," Eric told her. "Nate didn't feel entirely comfortable leaving him alone for about a month before you were shot. We were afraid of what he might do if he was left to his own devices for too long."

Blair closed her eyes as Eric's meaning sunk in. She couldn't believe that her disappearance could drive him into that deep a despair, but this was Chuck. He did self loathing better than anyone.

"B, you weren't the only one who shut him out," Eric said. "Up until I realized what Jenny did, I wasn't all that into spending time with him. I avoided him. Serena was the first to let him back in aside from Mom."

Blair nodded slightly, but the guilt was not as easily pushed away.

"I'm not helping you, am I," Eric frowned. "My intention is not to make you feel guilty in any way. Chuck hurt you deeply. You were well within your rights to cast him out of your life."

"But not out of our children's lives," she replied.

"I can't argue with that," Eric stated.

Blair shook her head, "You make forgiveness way too easy, Eric."

"It's a gift. Serena's good at guilt, I'm good at forgiveness, and you are good at anything you set your mind to."

"Trying to lift the heart patient's spirits," Blair teased.

"Any way I can," Eric smirked.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Nate watched his best friend hold Sabrina and smiled. Chuck Bass was an adoring father. It would have been an impossible image to picture back in high school but now it seemed to be second nature to him.

"Hey," Nate greeted.

"Hi," Chuck said as Nate entered the nursery. "What's up?"

"Serena wanted me to tell you that we'll be leaving soon. We have to head to the hospital and discuss Blair's future living situation."

"Right," Chuck nodded.

"Any thoughts on that," Nate asked his friend.

"I want her to come home with me," Chuck informed his best friend.

"Then tell her," Nate encouraged him as Chuck rocked Sabrina in his arms. She was sound asleep in his arms and holding his finger tightly in her fist.

"I'll end up scaring her off," Chuck said. "She'll think I'm rushing, things and she'll run in the opposite direction. I can't deal with that again Nate."

"You don't know that for sure," Nate responded, "She may want to go with you, but not want to ask."

"No, I know Blair," Chuck shook his head. "If I try to swoop in and take care of her, she'll think I'm trying to control the situation and she'll accuse me of trying to work her so she'll forgive me for what happened last year."

"Jack or Jenny?"

"Jack. Since Humphrey is now considered a friend, Jenny is no longer cannon fodder."

"She'll work her way through that in time. She loves you," Nate stated.

"Love doesn't wash away all sins," Chuck shook his head in self doubt.

"You're not asking her to wash the sins away," Nate replied, "You're asking for forgiveness. There is a difference."

"What makes you so sure she'll forgive me," Chuck asked.

"Because she forgave Serena and me," Nate said. "At that point in her life what Serena and I did was the worst thing we could've done and she forgave us. She still loves us. And because of it, she found her way to you.

"Perhaps you need to find a way to forgive yourself," Nate suggested after Chuck sat quietly for a few moments as he studied his daughter's face with a pained expression.

"What if I hurt Sabrina or Sebastian like I hurt their mother," Chuck spoke as the tears filled his eyes.

"You know better," Nate told him without pause or question. "You know better because you know what it's like to be the kid whose father hurts him without thinking twice about it. You know better because you watched all of your friends be hurt by their parents and you couldn't do anything about it. You can do something about making sure your kids aren't hurt."

"I will protect you from that, Sabrina," Chuck whispered in her ear as he kissed her forehead softly so he wouldn't wake her. "You will know you what it's like to feel a parent's love, from both of your parents."

"Also, you're a better person than you give yourself credit for," Nate said. "You tried to take me home with you when you realized how much trouble my family was in. You helped save Serena from herself more times than I can count. And when it comes to Blair, you're there without question. You'll do the same for these children."

Chuck nodded as Nate's words sunk in, "You have your moments, Archibald."

"Yeah well, what can I say? I want you and Blair to be happy because you both deserve it."

"So do you," Chuck nodded. "So, don't let her go this time."

"I'll try my best but sometimes it's like nailing Jell-O to the wall."

"But there's always room for Jell-O, so just keep trying."

"Guys," Serena stuck her head in through the opening of the door. "Hey. Mrs. Katz is here. Are you two ready?"

Chuck felt torn. He wanted to be at Blair's bedside, but he also wanted to stay with his children. He'd never felt this torn before. Blair had always been his choice before. He understood what people used to say about priorities shifting when a person has children.

"Chuck, if you don't want to come, that's fine. Blair will understand," Serena assured him. "But we are talking about where she's going to go when she's released."

"I'm coming," Chuck made his decision quickly. If he could get her to come home with him, he wouldn't have to choose between his children or her.

"Nicely done," Nate whispered to Serena as Chuck said his goodbyes to the children.

"Thanks," Serena smirked.

x-x-x-x-x

Blair felt crowded as everyone filed in her room to discuss her pending release.

"Hey guys," Blair smiled at her friends. "You just missed Eric."

"Where did he go," Serena asked.

"Back to the hotel," Blair explained. "Lily wants him to pack up his stuff. I think your mom is heading home."

"Blair, we need to talk about your release," Serena stated as she brought up the topic before anyone else could. "If you want to go back to your mother's penthouse, I'll come stay with you."

Blair looked at Chuck. His eyes were conflicted.

"Serena, you don't need to do that," Blair shook head. "I'm sure you have a lot of school to catch up on."

"Don't be silly," Serena shook off her friend's concern.

Chuck opened his mouth to speak, but he couldn't find the words.

"And if you don't let me move in with you, I'm packing you and the twins up and taking you home with me," Serena said.

"I'm not moving into your mom's Serena," Blair shook her head. "Rufus deserves more respect than that."

"Then it's settled, I'm coming to stay with you," Serena announced.

Blair looked at Chuck. She could see that he wanted to ask her to stay with him, but his self doubt was getting in the way. She looked at him hopefully, but no words came. Finally she nodded in agreement to Serena's suggestion though nobody could ignore the disappointment on her face.

"Great. I'll call Dorota and ask her to fix up a room for me," Serena smiled. "Your dad's talking to the doctor right now and getting all the paperwork in order."

"Chuck, a word," Nate said as he motioned Chuck towards the hallway.

"Sure," he nodded and followed his friend out of the room.

"Did you temporarily lose your ability to speak?"

"What are you talking about?" Chuck snapped defensively.

"Tell me you didn't see the way Blair was looking at you," Nate shook his head. "She wanted you to ask her to stay with you."

"I-I," again Chuck couldn't find the words.

"What's the matter with you?" Nate hissed. "Spit it out. There is still time to change her mind. Ask her to stay with you."

"I will not push her," Chuck said finally.

"You are officially the dumbest person in history. You want Blair to stay with you. She wants you to want her to stay with you. Stop being chicken shit and ask her. It's not pushing, if it's what she wants."

"No, Archibald, the dunce crown still goes to you," Chuck growled as he turned suddenly to return to Blair's side. His look told Nate not to follow.

Serena was about to pick up the phone.

"Serena, can we have a minute," Chuck asked.

"Sure, Chuck," she nodded, "What did you want to talk about?"

"No, I meant Blair and me," Chuck motioned to Blair.

"Oh. Right. I'll be outside with Nate."

"Thank you," Chuck said as Serena exited.

"What is it, Chuck," Blair asked, her voice sounded annoyed.

"I wanted to give you another living option."

"I think living with Serena is best for all of us," Blair responded quickly. Her wounded pride was getting the better of her at the moment. She was so mad that he hadn't asked in the first place.

Chuck's face fell as he nodded in agreement.

"So, I guess I'll see you back in New York," Blair said. "Who's packing up the twins?"

"I am," he responded softly, "If you'd like we can take the limo back to Manhattan. Give the children a taste of what their life will be like from now on."

"No," Blair shook her head. "I am not raising my-our children to think limos are the only mode of transportation. Chuck, I took driving lessons after they were born. I have a license. I was going to get a car. They will not be depending on Arthur or whomever to drive them everywhere they need to go."

"You're going to drive in New York City," Chuck bit his lip to keep from laughing.

"Why is that funny?" she snapped.

"You have no patience, Beautiful. You'll run everyone in your path over."

"Well, be that as it may, I don't want Sabrina and Sebastian thinking limos are the only way to go. Sebastian is not getting his own car and driver when he turns thirteen like you did and I am not letting Sabrina be alone in the back of one with a boy unless they're married."

"I'm not letting Sebastian have his own limo, either, and I fully agree with your proposal regarding Sabrina," Chuck assured her, "But these children are Basses. Limos are going to be a part of their lives."

"You are aware that their last name is Thayer, right?"

"By blood they're half Bass," he responded purposely ignoring the reminder that she'd given their children a name other than their own. He could have tolerated Waldorf, but he was determined to get their birth certificates changed.

Thayer was not acceptable.

"Are you sure that you want to have us all in the limo," Blair asked. "I could just as easily take the train with Serena, Lily, Eric, and Rufus."

"Limo," he nodded his head.

"Okay," Blair nodded. "Serena said she packed up some stuff for me already. But I don't think the trunk's going to fit everything we need."

"We'll ship whatever else we need," he told her.

Blair nodded again, "I can get Dan to pack up everything we can't fit into the limo. Um, have you talked to Cyrus?"

"Yes," he nodded, "He's waiting until you feel well enough to have Eleanor's funeral."

"I know," Blair said. "But I was asking how he is. I can't bring myself to call him."

"He's holding it together about as well as he can," Chuck told her. "He's devastated, obviously, but his first question whenever I speak to him is how you're doing. He's very worried about you."

"I got really lucky with him," Blair said quietly. "I could have ended up with someone like Serena's first stepfather. God, that guy was creepy. I heard he's doing time at the moment."

"Made Snow White's stepmother look like a saint," Chuck recalled.

"Your father was with a lot of women while we were growing up but he only married Lily. Why do you think that was?"

"Because he had impeccable taste," Chuck responded. "He knew the difference between a fling and love."

"You actually did learn something from him," Blair smiled shyly.

"I learned many things from him. Not all of them were good."

"But this one was good," she smiled a little more confidently as she took his hand into hers.

Chuck nodded as he kissed her hand softly. "The very best he had to offer."


	15. Chapter 15

Okay well, since fan fiction is our only salvation for _over a month _I'm going to do my best to post frequently. Thank you to my beta and to all the people who respond regularly. I know there are a lot of you who've put me on alerts. I want to hear from you! Let me know what you think.

0x0x0x0x0x0

Blair fastened a necklace around her neck and then centered the charm on her chest. She closed her eyes for a moment and when she opened them back up she started a bit.

"You scared me," she said turning to face her friend.

"Sorry," Nate responded with a sheepish grin. "I just wanted to see if you needed any help up here. I know Serena had to go to her mom's house to get dressed because Lily forgot to have the maid pack a dress and shoes today."

_God bless Lily_, Blair thought absently.

"I'm okay," Blair smiled as much as her mood could allow. "Thanks for asking though."

"Sure. How are you?"

"I just got out of the hospital because some loser with a gun wanted money that wasn't his and I'm about to bury my mother because she wouldn't give up her wedding ring. So, I'm just peachy," Blair said sarcastically.

"Sarcasm does not become you, Blair."

"Maybe not, but it does sustain me," Blair smiled as she dropped her gaze to the floor.

"Did you sleep last night?"

"Somewhat," Blair nodded. "Your girlfriend didn't make it easy. Every time I'd start to drift off, I'd hear her creep across the floor. I think she stuck a mirror under my nose at one point."

Nate smiled as he bit back a laugh he knew she wouldn't appreciate, "She just wants to make sure you're alright."

"I'd still be in the hospital if the doctors didn't think I'd be able to survive in the outside world."

"Blair, you were-"

"Shot, I know. I see the reminder every day. There's no need to keep bringing it up."

"And there was a huge panic factor for us," Nate said as he sat on Blair's bed. "Especially when we heard your mom didn't make it."

"Tell me something that I don't remember," Blair responded with a dramatic roll of her eyes, "But if this keeps up, I'll be back in the hospital with sleep deprivation."

"Do you want me to talk to her?" Nate chuckled.

"No, I want you to kill her and not tell me about it," Blair rubbed her forehead.

"Blair, she can't be that bad," Nate responded with the need to defend his girlfriend.

"If my children could talk, they'd want her banished. She's driving them as crazy as she is me," Blair added.

"Blair, you decent," Chuck asked from the other side of the door as he knocked softly.

"Yes, but if you give me five minutes, I can get Nate into a compromising position."

"It would take far longer than that," Chuck laughed as he opened the door, "Archibald has always been a late bloomer."

"Very funny, Chuck," Nate shook his head as his eyes recognized the infant in Chuck's arms. "Hey Sabrina."

"There's my little girl," Blair reached for her just as Chuck moved out of her reach. "Hey!"

"Sit down. No lifting until next week."

"I'm not looking to lift, I'm looking to hold," Blair pouted as she took the seat he suggested.

Chuck handed Sabrina to Blair and looked around, "Where's Serena?"

"Home," Blair said. "Lily forgot to pack a black dress for her."

Chuck couldn't ignore the relieved look on Blair's face as she appeared to be celebrating Serena's absence.

"Is everything alright with the besties?"

"I don't want to talk about it right now. Right now, I have my baby girl and two of my oldest friends with me. The rest of this day is going to be horrible but right now things are okay."

"Sebastian is out like a light," Chuck told her as he took a seat next to her and put his arm around her shoulder as he began to coo in his daughter's direction. "But this little lady doesn't want to go to sleep right now, even though it's her nap time. I think she wanted a kiss from Mommy."

"I didn't know you knew how to do that," Nate responded as his eyes widened at Chuck's baby talk voice.

"Well, I didn't know you could jump off a cliff and not have a scratch on you," Chuck said.

Blair stared, "What?" Clearly she'd missed something during her months of self imposed exile.

"Enough Chuck," Nate looked irritated as he turned to Blair to explain Chuck's offhanded remark. "Serena made us watch some lame movie a while back and she and Chuck think I look like one of the actors in it. It was somewhat funny at first but now it's just annoying."

"Why don't you go see if Sebastian and Sabrina's sitter is here yet," Chuck suggested to his friend.

"Okay," Nate said, looking happy to escape.

Once he was gone, Chuck turned to Blair, "How are you?"

"God, I wish everyone would stop asking me that," Blair sighed as she rocked Sabrina.

"We're just concerned about you," Chuck tried to rationalize.

"I know but I can't take the concern today, okay? Ask me how I am tomorrow," Blair said. She shot a look at the clock. "We should get going."

Chuck nodded as he lifted Sabrina from her arms. "I'll stop asking how you're feeling if you promise to chime in if you're not feeling well."

"I promise," Blair nodded as her eyes darkened with the conversation shift. "Have you seen Cyrus yet today? He didn't eat with us."

"He left early this morning to be with your mother. He wanted time alone with her."

Blair nodded, "I'll see you downstairs."

"Don't walk down in your heels," Chuck said.

"I haven't gotten dizzy in days, Chuck."

"I mean it, Waldorf. If I see you with heels on your feet on those stairs, I'm throwing you over my shoulder and carrying you down."

Blair rolled her eyes and slid her heels off. She held them in one hand and her purse in the other, "Happy?"

"Coat?"

"Downstairs. I had Dorota press it for me."

Chuck and Blair made their way down the hall to the children's nursery where he laid Sabrina in her crib. The little girl immediately raised her arms to her mother as she whined at being laid down before she wanted to be.

"I'm sorry, Baby," Blair leaned down. "You know you and your brother are the most important things in the world to me, but today I have to help Papa Cyrus. I love you." She kissed Sabrina's tiny hands.

Sabrina cried out again. It tore at Blair and Chuck's heart to have to turn away from their daughter's cries.

"It's just for today," Chuck assured Blair as they stepped out of the room. Blair couldn't force herself to take another step away from them as her daughter's cries rose in volume even as Chuck closed the door tightly.

"They need me," Blair said. "I can't leave them."

"Blair, Cyrus needs you today. Nothing about today is going to be easy but those little angels will be here at the end of it to make you feel better."

She nodded as her head came to rest against his shoulder.

"I'll be there with you, at your side as much as you need," Chuck said.

"I know," Blair nodded.

-x-x-x-x-

Blair barely heard the minister's words as they stood in the cemetery. She was vaguely aware of the people around her but she knew Cyrus was standing next to her with Aaron and behind her Chuck, Serena, and Nate stood close; Chuck directly behind her. Her mind kept churning with how surreal this moment felt. The woman who gave her life had been lowered into the ground before her. She was never going to see her again.

She realized that the minister had stopped speaking and that a man with a shovel was starting to put dirt into the grave. She couldn't watch that. She gasped tearfully and turned away to hide her face in Chuck's chest, his arms encircling her immediately.

"I'm here," he whispered as he held her tight.

"But she's not," she whispered back.

"She's still with us," Chuck assured her as his hands rubbed soothing circles into her back. "She's still in your heart."

Blair nodded against him and then took a deep breath to compose herself as she pushed away the tears. She pulled back, "I have to help Cyrus."

"You sure you're okay to do that? He'd understand."

"I have to," Blair said. "My mother would have counted on me to do this for her. I c-can't let her d-down."

"I'm here if you need me," he whispered as he pressed his lips to her forehead.

She nodded as she turned towards Cyrus and took his outstretched hand as he smiled warmly at his beloved step daughter as they stepped forward to toss roses into the grave.

x-x-x-x-x-x

The crowd at the penthouse was larger than she'd expected it to be. She'd been hoping that Cyrus would limit it to immediate family and close friends.

No such luck.

The mother in her hoped that the noise wouldn't wake her children who were just upstairs with their babysitter.

"Cyrus, would you excuse me," Blair asked as she squeezed his hand softly as she made her excuses to leave. She couldn't take the looks of pity she was getting any longer. "I want to get some water from the kitchen."

"Certainly, Dear," Cyrus excused her.

Chuck was a step behind her the entire way.

"You okay," Chuck asked as she kicked her heels off and watched them slide across the floor. She grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator and took a long pull from it before putting it down on the counter.

"I just needed to be alone in a room for a moment or two."

"I'll leave you then," he turned away from her quickly.

"No," Blair said as she reached out to halt his disappearance. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean you. You are the last person I want to leave me alone."

"Take all the time you need," he told her as he ran his hand along her back to offer his comfort.

"You have to do something for me though," Blair said looking slightly panicked.

"Anything, you know that."

"You have to get Serena out of here."

"Why?"

"She's making me crazy. Chuck, she tried to cook yesterday. She nearly set the kitchen on fire."

"Surprised she wasn't successful. She melted her easy bake oven when we were children," he responded with an amused chuckle.

"Don't tease," Blair stated as she felt a smirk forming. "Help me. Get Lily to ask Serena to come home. Have her say she's lonely. I'll get another nurse or something to move in."

"Not necessary," he shook his head. "Bring the children and come stay with me."

"Are you serious," Blair stared at him with wide eyes. Finally he was asking the question at the appropriate time and she could accept without regret.

"Yes. I think it'd be better for you there instead of here. You're not supposed to exert yourself and climbing those stairs all the time can't be good for you."

"And there would be the benefit of twenty-four hour room service, nightly turn downs, and mints on my pillow," she smiled.

"I have a kitchen," he smiled as he ran his fingers through her beautiful curls. "Dan says you make a pretty good apple cake."

"You also have a roommate. Isn't it going to be a little crowded?"

"Nate can find his own place. It's about time he took responsibility for his own life and became an adult. Besides, you and I have a family together. We've agreed to raise the children together. Living under the same roof will make that so much easier."

"Instead of just tossing Nate out on his backside, why don't he and I trade? Serena can continue to live here in my room and Nate can take the adjoining room for his own," Blair suggested. "That way Dorota will have someone to take care of and I don't have to feel guilty for making Nate suddenly homeless since he refuses to live with his mom."

"Van der Woodsen and Archibald shacking up, not sure they're in a good place for that, but it's an option that we'll propose to them."

"Are we in a good place to be 'shacking up'?" Blair inquired.

Chuck tucked a strand of Blair's hair behind her ear, "Nothing happens until you're ready, willing, and able. Separate rooms for as long as you want. And I'll only touch you when I think you want me to."

"Thank you for being so understanding," she smiled softly, "And so willing to take care of not only me, but also our children."

"You never have to thank me for that," he told her.

"You've been really great today," Blair said. "I don't think I would've made it this far without you. Cyrus says you took care of all the transportation for us today. That was really great of you."

"It's the least I could do. I wish he would have let me do a little more. Your mother deserves the best send off we could give her."

Blair smiled and stood on tiptoe to kiss Chuck's cheek and then wrapped her arms around his neck, "Thank you for keeping your promise to hold my hand."

"My goal in life is too keep every promise I ever have or ever will make to you from this moment on," he whispered into her ear as he melted against her, his arms wrapped loosely around her waist so as to not pressure her.

"We'll talk to Serena after everyone goes home," Blair told him. "Then I want to watch something that will make me laugh insanely."

"No Audrey?" Chuck replied, "I'm a little disappointed."

"There are things in this world other than Audrey," Blair smiled as the startled look appeared on his face. He'd never expected to hear those words from her. "I was as surprised as you are. There's this movie I saw on basic cable one night when I was pregnant with the twins called Oscar. It's a spoof of mobster movies. It's funny as hell. I nearly wet myself from laughing so much. Interested?"

"We could use a little levity in our lives," he nodded as he reluctantly released her when she pulled away.

"We should go back in. I have responsibilities today," she said. "I can't leave everything to Cyrus. He's not holding up very well."

"Promise me that you aren't over doing it," he requested, "You've only just been released from the hospital a few days ago."

"I sit, I accept their condolences, and I do my best to put on a brave face. When I need a break, I take it by excusing myself and coming into the kitchen. Dorota keeps people out except for you obviously."

"I'm going to go look in on Sabrina and Sebastian," he told her.

"Give them a kiss for me," Blair requested.

"I will. Don't forget your shoes," he said as he left the kitchen.

Blair watched him go and then turned to frown at her heels. She missed her sneakers.

-z-z-z-z-

Blair forced her last grateful smile as the elevator doors closed taking Lily and Rufus with them. She reached back and unclipped her hair before stepping out of her shoes. She could feel the last bit of stress leaving her body.

"Cyrus, you look exhausted," she told her step-father. "Go to sleep. I'm not staying up much longer."

"Are you sure, Sweetheart?" Cyrus inquired with a sad smile. "I can stay up a bit longer."

"I want to talk to Serena before I go to bed, but I'll see you at breakfast," she said before she kissed his cheek. "Daddy and Roman will be here at nine. We're eating with them before I see them off to the airport."

"I love you, Dear," Cyrus stated as he began the climb up the staircase.

"Love you, too," Blair smiled.

Blair watched him go before she turned and went into the living room. She could hear her friends getting food in the next room so she walked over to the couch, sat on the arm and let herself fall back. She landed with a soft thud and stared at the ceiling.

In her mind she could hear her mother scolding her for the unladylike way she was sitting on the furniture and the tears began to flow.

"Blair," Nate ventured, "you hungry? There's a lot of food left over."

"No," she shook her head as she pushed the tears away, hoping that Nate wouldn't see them. He had always hated when she cried. He always panicked and went to find Serena to deal with her.

"You sure," Chuck asked taking hold of one of her ankles and squeezing gently. He wouldn't miss the tears even if Nate had. He knew her every emotion just by the sound of her voice. "You didn't eat a lot today. You still have to take one more pill, and you can't do it on an empty stomach."

She nodded reluctantly as he pulled her to her feet and guided her into the kitchen.

"Hey," Serena said handing a plate to Blair. "The lasagna's good."

Blair nodded as Chuck lifted an eyebrow and waited for her to nod before he dished up a piece onto her plate.

He had been simply amazing today. She couldn't even begin to express how grateful she was to him.

She waited until they were all sitting at the dining room table before she started to talk, "So, Serena, Chuck and I were talking today."

"You've been doing that a lot lately," Serena responded. "Anything in particular?"

"Yes," Blair nodded as Chuck's arm came around the back of her chair. His thumb caressed her back to offer her support as she dropped the bomb on Serena. "We were thinking that maybe we should live together for a while. We've agreed to raise the children together and there's a lot more help at his place than here."

"But . . ." Serena wanted to speak up to try changing her mind, but Nate shook his head to discourage her. The pair needed to do this. It was an important step to reconnect.

"I'm not kicking you out. You can stay here as long as you want. Cyrus is going back to Paris as soon as things are settled here. He said that he has no problem with you staying."

"But I think you'll have a roommate," Chuck said looking at Nate.

"You're kicking me out?" Nate gasped. He had no idea that Blair moving in with Chuck would leave him with no place to stay. He never would have been so encouraging had he known.

"Nate, do you really want to live with a recovering gunshot survivor and two infants," Blair asked.

"And you and S can play house," Chuck chimed in as he tried to smooth things over.

"Is that what you two are going to do," Nate asked.

"No," Blair shook her head. "I'm going to live with Chuck because he has the room and it's all on one level and he doesn't like me walking up and down the stairs when I have heels on."

"Not to mention round the clock staff to cater to her every need," Chuck chimed in.

"And a willing boyfriend to satisfy her every desire," Nate added.

"Slow it down, Archibald," Chuck cautioned him with a menacing glare. "We're a ways away from that."

The silence that descended upon them was incredibly awkward.

"Hey, how about that movie," Blair said getting up from the table, having eaten just enough food so that the pill she needed to take wouldn't irritate her stomach. "I'm going to go make popcorn. Serena, how about you come with me and get the drinks?"

"Good idea," Serena said.

"So, what Audrey masterpiece are we watching," Nate asked as he and Chuck got up from the table.

"No Audrey tonight," Chuck said scanning the titles of the DVD library in the Waldorf living room. "We're watching something called Oscar. Here it is." He pulled the case out and checked the credits. "Whoa."

"What?"

"Blair?"

"What," Blair said from the hallway as she came into the living room. "Popcorn's almost ready. Nate, do you still like hot sauce on it?"

"You like a movie with Sylvester Stallone in it," Chuck asked.

"Yes," Blair said defensively.

"You do realize who Sylvester Stallone is, right," Chuck prompted her, "Remember those Rambo movies Archibald used to force us to watch. You used to say you'd never watch another movie of his again as long as you lived."

"He doesn't beat anybody up in this movie. He's actually funny. The closest he gets to fighting is mentioning that if some fighter got the workout he's been getting by running up and down the stairs he wouldn't have lost his last fight."

"Just making sure," Chuck replied as he popped the movie into her player as Serena came in with the beverages and large bowl of popcorn.

"You will love the staircase, Serena," Blair said. "It's like something you'd see in those old mansions your grandmother used to make us tour with her up in Rhode Island. You remember?"

"Unfortunately," Serena nodded. She'd never understood the fascination her grandmother had with the mansion tours she used to force on Serena.

"The Breakers were my favorite," Blair smiled as she leaned back. "Nate's family home."

"The one time I go with you guys and we tour the old Vanderbilt house," Nate groaned.

"I must have been absent that day," Chuck chimed in having felt left out of the conversation.

"No, you were in Venice or something," Serena said. "Bart decided to take you with him at the last minute."

"One of the very few times he tolerated my presence, I'm sure," he grumbled.

Blair slid her hand into his and squeezed lightly, giving him a sidelong glance, "Maybe this summer we can take a trip. It might be fun."

"Especially if Sabrina and Sebastian are walking," Serena chuckled, "It would be fun to try chancing them down those long corridors."

"They'll barely be six months," Blair said. "Don't rush them."

"When do babies start walking?" Serena inquired, showing how clueless she truly was about infant development.

"Around a year," Chuck said. Everyone stared at him. "I did a lot of reading."

"Start the movie already," Blair demanded as she snuggled against him as Serena did the same against Nate.

It felt strangely familiar, yet completely foreign all at the same time. The quartet had watched hundreds of movies together over the years, but never like this.

It had always been Blair snuggled up with Nate and Serena and Chuck keeping their distance from each other.

Blair's eyes started to droop around the time Little Anthony the Accountant asked for a raise and by the time Snaps was trying to choke him because he'd told him he was sleeping with his daughter she was in dreamland.

"Blair," Chuck whispered softly into her ear to test if she was still awake. Blair mumbled something incoherent and snuggled in closer.

"Is she asleep?" Serena inquired as she and Nate turned towards his voice.

"Yes, I think so," Chuck nodded. "I think today's catching up with her." He maneuvered around and scooped Blair up off the couch.

"I'll help you," Serena said as she got up.

"I have her," Chuck assured her. "You guys finish the movie."

"Are you sure?" Serena pressed. She'd never really seen Chuck as the type of guy able to carry a woman that great a distance. From the doorway of a bedroom to the nearest bed, yes, but from a living room, up a flight of stairs and down a hallway, no.

"We'll be fine," Chuck said. "Blair was right, this movie is funny. Stay and enjoy it."

Chuck carried her effortlessly up the stairs and into her bedroom. The nostalgia of the room hit him immediately. All the hours they'd spent in this room making plans to take down enemies, hiding away from everyone as they made out for hours, making love when he'd been turned out of the Empire by his supposed 'undead' mother.

He couldn't believe he'd ever even though of risking what they had.

He would regret it for the rest of his life.

Laying her down on the bed he grabbed the folded blanket at the end and he spread it over her and kissed the crown of her head. He backed away slowly. Just as he got to the door Blair murmured.

"Chuck?"

He turned to see her head had lifted up, "It's okay. Go back to sleep."

"Stay with me?"

He froze for a moment unsure of how to proceed. Was she really asking because it was what she wanted or was she asleep and merely dreaming it was what she wanted?

"Just no scarf this time," she said. "No shoes either. I don't want my sheets dirty."

She was most definitely awake, he concluded as he slipped out of his shoes and laid out next to her, wrapped her in his arms. They both drifted off into a sleep like they hadn't experienced in months.


	16. Chapter 16

16-

Blair broke down another box expertly and added it to the pile for housekeeping to clear the next day. All her months of running a café made this task surprisingly effortless in a way she never could have imagined before. The last box in her pile was a smaller one that Cyrus had given her before he'd left the day before as she was packing up her belongings for the movers. He hadn't told her what was in it. She figured it was something for the twins. She opened up the top and cleared away the top layers of tissue paper. Picking the first item up, she gasped in surprise.

"Blair, did Nate and Serena- Blair," Chuck trailed off as he took in the expression on her face as he got closer to her. "What is it?"

"I finally got to the box Cyrus gave me," Blair explained as she wiped a tear away.

"What was in it," he asked as he caressed her shoulder softly feeling that she needed the comfort.

"This, for starters," Blair handed the picture over.

"Is that you and your mom," he inquired as he looked to the younger version of Eleanor holding a tiny infant in her arms with a proud smile on her face.

"Yes," Blair nodded. "That's the day I was born."

"She looks happy," Chuck sat down beside her as he studied the image in her hand a little more closely. He could see Sabrina in both of the women in the picture and it made him smile. "You look adorable."

"Chuck, I look like a squished meatball," Blair responded as she wrinkled her nose.

"You're adorable," he repeated as he trailed a finger down her cheek softly. "We should put this up next to the picture of the twins that Serena gave me."

Blair nodded.

"Was there anything else in the box," he asked.

"I don't know. I had just opened it when you came in," Blair said reaching into it again. She pulled out a small box this time. Opening it up, she smiled a little, "I didn't realize she still had this. I would've thought she'd given it back."

"Given what back?"

Blair turned the box towards Chuck, "It's the engagement ring my dad gave her when he proposed. I think it was my great grandmother's."

"It's beautiful," he replied as he examined the gems of the ring. He vaguely remembered Eleanor wearing it, but it had been so many years that he'd forgotten the design.

Blair smiled, "Yes, it is. I think I'll save it for Sebastian, in case he wants to use it when he finds the girl he wants to marry. Unless you want to give him the ring your dad gave your mom."

"I don't know where it is," he frowned.

"Lily might," Blair suggested as she pulled the ring back towards her and traced the setting with a gentle finger. "I packed up their wedding album the other day. I found it in the back of my mom's office closet. I always thought she threw it out after the divorce."

"Your mom kept things that were important," Chuck put the picture of her and her mother down.

"Yeah, I guess she did," Blair's eyes trailed over to the picture. "I wonder where that was. I don't ever remember seeing it."

"It was probably in her room where she could see it every day. It's a private memory that she wouldn't want to share."

Blair nodded and snapped the ring box closed. She set it on the coffee table and pulled out the last item. She peeked into the box and said, "This is the last one."

She removed the tissue paper from around the object and put her hand over her mouth.

"Blair?"

Blair took her hand away, "I think I was nine. It was the first time my mom ever deemed me old enough to accompany her."

"Accompany her where," Chuck was confused.

Blair showed him the picture, "To one of her fashion shows. It was the first time I ever really felt included in her life beyond being her daughter."

"You look so cute," Chuck took the picture from her and admired the Eleanor original she was wearing. "I remember hearing you telling Serena about all the clothes you saw and how the models looked like stick figures."

"Yes, well anorexia is a disease, not a fashion statement," Blair tilted her head to look at the picture Chuck was holding. "She left her company to me."

"Yes, Cyrus told me. He also said you wanted his help in selling it."

"My mom loved what she did. I don't have the same passion for designing clothes that she did."

"So, you're going to sell it," he frowned.

"I like my café. I like reading the books we get and letting some unknown author sell his work that he had printed at some little obscure printing house. I love listening to music all day and seeing the looks on people's faces when I tell them I know Rufus Humphrey. I leave Dan being his son out of it. I don't want to start a mob scene," Blair smiled. "I like experimenting with recipes and seeing what comes out good and what should be considered a science experiment gone horribly wrong."

"Are you sure you want to sell your mother's company right away?" Chuck inquired. "I don't want you doing something you might regret down the road. You're still very much in mourning. You may think differently a few months or years down the road."

"What is the alternative?" Blair asked curiously. "If I keep it, the company shrivels and dies. If I sell it, perhaps Eleanor's legacy could be passed on to someone else with the same passion."

"Bass Industries has a fashion wing. Let me buy you out. If you change your mind down the road, I promise to hand it back to you at a more than fair price."

"You'd do that for me," Blair smiled as she looked at him with her eyes shining with tears.

"Don't you know by now that I'd do anything for you," he told her as he caressed her cheek softly.

"Chuck, thank you," Blair smiled softly and she gave him a hug. She pulled back and leaned in to kiss his cheek at the exact moment Chuck turned to look at her. Their lips met and lingered.

Chuck held himself back, but it was Blair that deepened the kiss as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

Suddenly the alarm bells went off in her head and she pulled away.

"Oh God," Blair said rubbing her hand over her face as she felt herself flush in embarassment. "Oh God."

"I'm sorry," Chuck said immediately.

"No, it's me," she responded quickly, "It's too fast. I need more time."

"I don't ever want to push," Chuck told her as he caressed her side softly to assure her that he was okay with them stopping.

Blair stopped panicking and looked at him with a small smile on her lips, "You're still that guy, aren't you?"

"What guy?"

"The one who asked if I was sure the first time we slept together."

"I try to be," he replied as he caressed her chin softly before he felt the need to add, "Only with you."

Blair smiled at him and then looked around at the familiar surroundings of his penthouse, "I never thought I'd be back here."

"Bad memories?" he frowned.

"Not all of them," Blair said. "Some of them were very happy."

"Are you hungry? I can call down for dinner," he suggested as he looked for a way to change the subject.

"You asking because you haven't seen me eat yet today?"

"I'm asking because I know how much you used to enjoy the kitchen's creations," he chuckled lightly, "Unless your palate has changed during your time away."

"No, it hasn't changed all that much," Blair smiled. "But make it something fast okay? I'm feeling a little sleepy. It's been a long day."

"Fast it is," he nodded as he picked up his direct connection to the kitchen and ordered her favorite.

"I'm going to go see how the children are settling into their room," Blair told him as she kissed his cheek lightly.

Chuck's eyes slid closed at the brief contact and he nodded slightly before his eyes opened to watch Blair walk away.

"What do you think of your new home?" Blair cooed as she strolled into the children's room to see them looking around at their lavishly furnished new room. Even on short notice, Chuck had tricked out their room with the best of everything. It was well past their bedtime, and they should have been sound asleep by now, but the excitement of their surroundings was keeping them awake.

Sebastian looked up at her with hopeful eyes. Blair had to smile at how much he looked like Chuck when he wanted something. She could only imagine what Sebastian would use that look to get in the future.

She rubbed her temples and decided to change her line of thinking. Wondering what Sebastian would use that look to get in the future was giving her the beginnings of a headache.

"Daddy is spoiling you, isn't he," she chuckled as she eyed the Egyptian cotton sheets they were laying on. "I'm going to do my best to make sure you're not spoiled rotten."

"You won't succeed," Chuck replied as he strolled into the room behind her. "They will have the best of everything, including their parents."

"Normal, Chuck," Blair replied. "I was going to raise them normally. I wasn't going to do what Eleanor and Bart did. They are going to be down to earth and unspoiled children."

"I'll try to restrain myself," he offered, knowing full well he wouldn't succeed.

"You're going to give them everything they ask for, aren't you," Blair eyed him knowingly. "I stand by what I said about the limo and driver. Sebastian does not get one for his 13th birthday the way you did."

"You have my word that they will not have their own transportation until well after they graduate into the real world."

"Thank you," Blair smiled. "Now about school."

"Blair, they're still in diapers. Let's hold off on the school thing until they can actually go."

"They should go to public school," Blair finished.

"Public school," Chuck questioned as he followed Blair into the living room where she took the pictures she'd found and set them up on the mantel of the fireplace near the one Chuck had of the twins.

"Yes," Blair nodded. "No snobbish kids and no Met steps."

"Public school," he repeated as the words sounded dirtier the second time around. "What was wrong with our education? We had the best money could buy."

"And look how we turned out," Blair eyed him.

"I run a fortune 500 company and you have your own successful business," Chuck pointed out. "I think we did okay."

"I don't want them judged by the amount of money they have or what their parents do for a living."

"They will be no matter where they go to school," he told her. "No matter where they go they'll always have the expectations that come with being a Bass/Waldorf offspring."

"Chuck, half the kids at St. Jude's and Constance wouldn't acknowledge that you existed because Bart was new money."

"And that didn't bother me because I had more money than all of them," Chuck told her.

"They should keep their last name as it is," Blair told him, "Give them the anonymity that they deserve."

"Blair, their birth certificates say Thayer," he growled.

"Yes, I know. So does my driver's license. I legally changed it. I got all the documents, and I filed them before I left Paris. Legally my last name is Thayer. I left Blair Waldorf on a bridge after I read one last Gossip Girl post."

"Changing your name does not change who you are," he told her.

"Maybe not but it does give me something I wouldn't have had with the last name Waldorf."

"And what's that?"

"Freedom. If I'd failed, people wouldn't have been comparing me to my mom and saying how she never would've failed. I get to be my own person instead of Eleanor Waldorf's daughter. I want to give that to our children," Blair told him, "Imagine how much easier your life would have been had you not had to carry the Bass name around all your life."

Chuck looked at her in understanding, "I see what you mean but-"

"If you say something about having a son to carry on the name, I'll scream."

"That's not an issue to me," Chuck told her, "I just don't want to give the children an example that it's okay to run from their problems. I've lived a lifetime of running from things and it got me nowhere. Spin this however you like but, that is what changing their names is - running."

"But changing their names to Bass isn't running."

"It's owning who they are."

Blair sighed, "I will think about it. But if I see one document about this, I am going back to Jersey with the kids and marrying Humphrey."

"Humphrey, really?" he gasped.

"Yes," Blair smiled. "Makes you crazy doesn't it?"

"More than you realize," he groaned as he realized she knew how much it bothered him.

"Good. I just want you to keep it in mind should you feel the need to call your lawyer before I've said yes or no."

"Point taken," he nodded as he heard the elevator chime the arrival of their meal.

"Dinner," Blair said. "Great, I'm starving."

-z-z-z-z-z-z-

"So, how are things going with you and Chuck," Serena asked as she sat down on the sofa across from Blair who had just put the twins down for a nap about two weeks after Blair had moved into the penthouse.

"Okay, I guess. We're kind of feeling our way through things."

"Really," Serena rose an eyebrow at the suggestive context she'd taken from Blair's response.

"Not like that," Blair frowned at her. "Remove your mind from the gutter please."

"Well, it's you and Chuck. The physical thing-"

"Change of subject please," Blair said as loudly as she dared before she ran the risk of waking up the twins.

"I liked the movie we watched the other night," Serena complied. "Nate and I had a good laugh imagining Chuck choking some poor boy for stealing his money and sleeping with his daughter."

Blair giggled as she rested her feet on the coffee table, "I think I'm going to have a hard time convincing Chuck to let Sabrina date."

"You're not kidding," Serena shook her head. "Chuck knows what teenage boys are thinking about when they look at a pretty girl because he thought it."

"He thought it ten times over and worse and sooner. When we were all just discovering kissing, he was nailing Georgina Sparks."

The girls exchanged a grimace of disgust when they thought of just who Chuck had cashed in his V-card too.

"You do realize that _both_ of your step-brothers slept with that creature," Blair raised an eyebrow. "And that for a short while, one of them thought they shared a child."

"I try not to think about it and to just be really grateful that Nate never slept with her."

Blair shuddered, "Gross. Knowing that Chuck slept with her is bad enough. I don't think I'd want to have slept with two of the same guys she did."

"Well, I slept with Dan before she did, so I'm happy."

Blair rolled her eyes, "But going back to the Nate mention, did I tell you that the Captain wrote to me?"

"No. When?"

"I got the mail from the penthouse the other day and it was in there. He just wanted to express his condolences and say that he was sorry that he couldn't be at the funeral but they only let inmates out to attend if it's immediate family. He said that he was glad I was okay and that Nate had showed him a picture of the twins and he thinks they're adorable."

"That was really sweet of him," Serena smiled. "But not surprising. You were almost his daughter-in-law."

"Somehow, I don't think it would've happened even if Nate had never slept with you. I think we would've eventually self-destructed some other way."

Serena's mouth twisted into half a frown but she didn't get a chance to speak because the elevator dinged announcing someone's presence.

Blair's eyes widened, "Anne?"

"Hello Blair," Anne Archibald smiled at the girl who was getting to her feet and the blonde who had turned around to look at her. "Serena."

"Hi," Serena said. "How are you?"

"I'm fine. Blair, I'm sorry to come over without calling but I was in the neighborhood and well, there's something I've been wanting to give you for awhile."

"I should go," Serena got up.

"No, Serena," Anne shook her head. "That's not necessary. It's just something I put together when Nathaniel told me Blair had given birth."

That was when Blair noticed the gift bag Anne had at her side.

"Anne, that wasn't necessary," Blair said as she moved over to where the older woman was standing.

"Yes, it was," she said. "You've always held a very special place to me, even after you and Nathaniel went your separate ways. Charles' mother would've loved you, I hope you know that."

Blair stared for a moment and then it hit her, "I'd forgotten that you and she were best friends; that you'd grown up together." There were albums at the Vanderbilt home full of pictures of a growing Evelyn Charles and Anne Vanderbilt.

Anne nodded, "She was supposed to be Nathaniel's godmother. That's why he only has a godfather. I couldn't bring myself to replace her." She handed the bag to Blair. "I think naming me and Howard as Charles' godparents was the last wish of Evelyn's that Bart ever honored."

"I don't think I ever knew that you and Howard were Chuck's godparents," Blair said accepting the bag.

Anne smiled, "I don't think Charles remembers or even knew for that matter. But there are some pictures in there from his christening. There are also some pictures of Charles' maternal grandparents. Evelyn got her eyes from her father. And as the picture Nathaniel showed me proves, they'll carry on."

"They're asleep right now," Blair said. "Otherwise I'd be more than happy to have you hold them."

"Another time," Anne nodded. Then she hugged Blair, "I want to say again how sorry I am about Eleanor and how glad I am that you're alright."

"Thank you, Anne," Blair said hugging her back. "Come by anytime."

"Thank you," Anne nodded as the hug ended. She looked over at Serena who was desperately trying to look like she wasn't listening. "Serena, I trust Nate told you about dinner next weekend?"

"Saturday night at your house," Serena nodded.

"Drinks at six," Anne told her.

"We'll be there."

"Good," Anne said before leaving.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck arrived home at a little after five that evening and found Blair on the couch with a photo album opened on her lap.

"Hello, Beautiful," he said as he put down his briefcase and jacket. "Is that something of your mother's?"

"No," Blair looked up. "Anne came by today."

"Nathaniel's mom," Chuck questioned as he sat down next to her and lifted the glass next to her to his nose to sniff. "What are you drinking?"

"It's soda, don't worry," Blair shook her head. "If you want wine, you have to order it. Serena confiscated all the liquor after Anne came over. She knows I like to drink when I cry."

"And she thought you'd cry after Anne left?"

"Yes," Blair pointed to a picture. "Your mom made a beautiful bride. I love her dress."

"Where did Anne get that," he gasped in surprise. He'd never seen any pictures of his parents' wedding.

"She was the maid of honor," Blair pointed to another picture. "That's Nate's grandma with them. Anne told me once that after your grandma died, Evelyn pretty much lived with them."

"I didn't know that," Chuck said quietly.

"I bet there's a lot you don't know," Blair said twining her arm with his and put her hand on top of his. "Like, did you know that Anne and Howard are your godparents and that your mom was supposed to be Nate's godmother?"

"No. I knew they were close but I never imagined that they were that close. Anne never said anything."

"I'm not surprised. I called Lily after Anne left. She said Anne wouldn't stop crying for about a month after your mom died. After that, she barely mentioned Evelyn."

"Of course. Vanderbilt's always keep things in their proper place. Grief is messy," Chuck said quietly as she traced the edge of a picture of his mother and Anne in caps and gowns.

"That's high school," Blair said. "Anne's father has the same one in the living room at his house."

"They're only a couple of years younger there than we are right now," Chuck thought aloud. "Seven years later, she was gone."

"Chuck," Blair put her other hand on top of his and hers. "Please don't do this to yourself."

"She knew what could happen if she had a baby and she went ahead and did it anyway," there was anger in his voice.

"And as sorry as I am that she's gone, I'm glad she had you," Blair told him honestly as she lifted her hand from theirs and turned his face to hers. "Because without you, Sabrina and Sebastian wouldn't exist and I would be some miserable shell of a person who never knew what it was like to have someone who loved just me, flaws and all."

Chuck rested his forehead against hers, "But-"

Blair cut him off, knowing he was about to defend his best friend, "Nate loved me when he wanted to; when he didn't have anyone else. I am convinced that if Serena hadn't run off to boarding school the morning after the Shepherd wedding, he would've dropped me faster than a hot plate."

"I should've been a better friend to you when that happened," Chuck said. "I knew and I didn't say anything."

"You were and are Nate's best friend in this world," Blair reminded him. "If it had been me and Serena, you couldn't have pried it out of me. There's also a better than average chance that I wouldn't have believed you and not because I thought you would go that far to break me and Nate up but because I wouldn't have wanted to believe he could do something so despicable with my best friend."

"Do you know when I realized I was in love with you?"

Blair shook her head, "No."

"You were up on stage at Victrola and you had just sent this look out over your shoulder," Chuck smiled at the memory. "That was when I stopped thinking of you as Nate's and realized I wanted you to be mine."

"That night changed a lot of things for me as well," she admitted. "And it was more than just the fact that you took my virtue. I began to see myself in a different light. I always felt suffocated in the perfect little world I'd created and then suddenly I was free…free of the trapped relationship with Nate, free of my mother's overbearing influence, free to just be me. As scary a thought at that was, I knew I was safe with you. There was this look in your eyes that told me you'd protect me from the world at any cost, even from yourself if needed."

"I honestly never thought you'd go through us having sex that night," he admitted shyly. "I thought as soon as I asked if you were sure, you'd sober up, realize what you were about to do, and turn back into prim and proper Blair."

"I did the next morning," she frowned.

"Were you ashamed of what you'd done? Or who you'd done it with," he inquired.

"Are you looking for an honest answer," she asked, unsure of how she should proceed.

"It's about time we laid all our cards on the table, so yes, the honest answer," he nodded.

"Then yes to both questions," she admitted. "But not because you were Chuck Bass or because the sex was horrible. It was phenomenal. I was afraid I'd just be another notch on your bedpost."

"You've always been special to me," he told her. "You have to know that."

"I know that now," she nodded.

"It hurt when you pushed me away," he replied.

"I'm sorry," she responded as she laced her fingers with his. "But I was scared of being rejected. That night meant so much for me. I didn't want to ruin it."

"Can we find our way back to each other?"

"We can only try," she responded. "I know it's not the answer you're looking for, but it's the only one I have right now."

"Are you will to try," he asked, his voice tense and nervous as his uncertainty of her response filled his head and heart.

Blair smiled softly as she angled his head towards her and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. Again he didn't seek out more. He let her guide their movements. The chemistry was undeniable. She could feel the current pass between them even from this simple, gentle kiss. No warning bells sounded this time.

"I am," she nodded when she pulled away. He looked at her for clarification as she nestled her head in the crook of his neck. "Willing to try," she elaborated. "But I need to go at my own pace."

"I accept your terms," he told her.

"I'm going to check on the twins and then I'll start dinner," she announced as she stood up reluctantly and passed him the book that Anne had given her earlier.

He nodded as she left the room. He began to browse the book, but quickly closed it as his eyes found a picture of his mother in her wedding dress beaming up at his father as they shared a joy Chuck had never seen from his old man. He wasn't ready to face these demons, not without Blair at his side.

**-d-d-d-d-**

**Yes I know Evelyn's last name wasn't Charles but I'm taking dramatic license with this.**


	17. Chapter 17

Okay, sorry about cutting 16 off. The rest of it is posted if you want to go back and read it. The ending was a lot better. So, this is 17. Thank you to my amazing beta for all her help. I want lots of replies you guys.

=x=x=x=x=x=

Blair finished drying the dishes she'd just used to feed a fussier than normal Sebastian late one evening. She closed the cabinet doors and turned off the lights. The apartment was dark but she knew her way back to her room well enough not to need much light as her eyes adjusted to the darkness.

"Blair!"

The young woman jumped in fright as her name was called. That had been Chuck's voice and it hadn't been a moan or groan of her name. It was him calling for her in desperation.

She couldn't bring herself to ignore his call as she went towards his room. She pushed open his door and through the darkness saw him sitting up in bed, "Chuck?

"Blair," he called out into the darkness. He sounded panicked and ashamed. He was praying she hadn't heard his shouts. "What are you doing up?

"Sebastian was hungry," she explained. "He just fell back to sleep."

"Good," he nodded as he crossed his fingers that she'd let go of the reason she'd entered his room in the first place.

"Hey," she came further into his bedroom. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," he told her curtly.

"Chuck, please don't lie to me," Blair said as she came closer.

"Please, just let this go," he requested as she sat down at the edge of his bed. He flipped on the bedside lamp. They both flinched at the light.

"You know me better than that," she replied as she rubbed his shoulder gently.

Chuck couldn't help leaning into her touch. For a moment at least he could pretend that she still shared his bed instead of just the apartment.

"What's going on?"

"Please just let this go," he requested one final time, hoping that she'd just this once allow him to bury his feelings.

"If it was me, would you let it go," Blair asked as her hand trailed up to his chin as their eyes locked.

"Unfortunately no," he sighed, "But I should."

"Scoot down," Blair encouraged him.

"What?"

"Just trust me," Blair told him.

Chuck moved down and then Blair lay back on the space behind him, her legs dangling over the edge. Then she pulled him back by the shoulder and Chuck found his head resting on her stomach and Blair's fingers gently brushing his face.

"Talk," she commanded gently.

Chuck closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. "I had a bad dream."

"About me," she concluded.

"Yes," Chuck admitted. "You were there and then you weren't."

"I'm here now," she reminded him. "What happened in the dream?"

"We were just standing there talking in the penthouse about nothing in particular and then there was some kind of flash and you were gone. I looked everywhere, but I couldn't find you," Chuck said hoarsely.

Blair's fingers started to run through his hair in a soothing motion, her nails lightly scratching his scalp, "I'm here. I'm okay."

"That feels good," he sighed in contentment as his eyes closed reflexively.

Blair smiled, "It's supposed to. You need to relax, Chuck. Have you been having these dreams a lot?"

"On and off for the last few weeks. It didn't start until after your mom's funeral. Before then I was too exhausted to dream."

"You should have told me sooner," she responded.

"For what purpose," he replied.

"Because we're trying that whole honesty thing, remember," Blair smiled.

"It's a little embarrassing," Chuck said. "What am I supposed to say, 'Blair, I'm having nightmares'? I'd have felt like I was five."

"That's exactly what you should have said," she responded, "I can't help you if I don't know something is bothering you."

"You do help," Chuck told her. "You help by being at the breakfast table when I wake up each morning and when I get home."

"That's not what I mean," she responded. "If the roles were reversed, you'd be right at my side chasing away those dreams. I want to do that for you."

"Are you willing to do this every night? Because that is what it's going to take," Chuck told her. "Just lay in bed with me, listening to the dreams I have about losing you."

"Lying in bed with you making sure you know that I'm here, safe and sound, and that I intend to stay that way for a very long time because you need to sleep too," Blair corrected his thinking.

"What about those boundaries we have in place? We go at your pace, remember? We sleep in separate beds until you're ready."

"Boundaries about sex, Chuck," Blair reminded him. "There are no boundaries about being there for each other when we need each other. You stayed up holding my hand all night when I found out my mom died. You held me up the day of her funeral and you held onto me all night long that night without even trying to kiss me just because I asked you to stay."

"You'll really stay with me," he realized as his voice filled with amazed gratitude.

"Yes, I'll stay with you," she confirmed as she nudged him to sit up so she could swing her legs onto the bed and curl into his side.

Chuck lay back down and Blair put her hand above his heart, "Turn the light off. I'll still be here."

Chuck fell into a peaceful sleep instantly.

Blair could feel his body relax and smiled. She'd never admit it but she'd missed this.

His rhythmic breathing lulled her to sleep mere moments later.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair turned half one way and half the other as she considered the dress she was trying on. She'd already picked out her jewelry and now she was trying to find the right dress to go with it.

She spotted Chuck in the reflection of the mirror as he stood in the doorway smiling at her.

"Amusing yourself, Bass," she asked as she turned around.

"I actually came in to ask for your help," he said holding up his tie. "But watching you twist and turn is very appealing to me."

"Get over here and give me the tie," Blair said as she got on her bed and knelt by the edge so that she was eye level with Chuck. "You look good."

"Thank you," Chuck said. "I'm rather fond of the outfit you've chosen as well."

"That's not what I meant. You've lost that tired look in your eyes that I didn't notice until I caught you having a bad dream," Blair said as she took the tie from him and looped it around his neck.

"Well, I've recently been talking to an amazing sleep therapist," Chuck smiled.

"Really?"

"Yes and she's helped me more than I could ever begin to thank her for," Chuck said catching her eye.

Blair smiled as she finished with Chuck's tie, "You're welcome. I'm glad it's working."

Chuck caught her hands before she moved them away, "I mean it, Blair. You've been amazing these past two weeks."

"And I meant what I said; there are no boundaries about being there for one another. Before we were lovers, Chuck, we were friends. Once upon a time, one led to the other and if and when it does this time, I'm going to make sure we don't lose the friendship part of us."

"So am I," Chuck told her quietly. He turned to look into her full length mirror as he admired her handy work. "Perfect as usual."

"I need just a few more minutes," she told him as she slid off her bed and began twirling in front of the mirror once again.

Chuck watched her for a moment before he saw the nervousness in her eyes.

"You look beautiful," he assured her.

"This is my first high society event since the children were born," she replied with a nervous hitch. "Those horrible gossips will already be judging me for having children out of wedlock. I don't want to give them license to criticize my attire."

"You have nothing to worry about," Chuck whispered in her ear as his hands rested on her hips. "You look amazing and the only thing the gossips will be thinking is that they wished they looked as good as you do."

Blair smiled and leaned her head back to rest against his shoulder, "Be that as it may, I think I'm going to try to find something with a higher neckline."

"Why?"

"So that a certain white line isn't visible," Blair said with a self conscious smile.

He'd been so busy looking at her beautiful reflection that he hadn't seen the top of her surgical scar. "It's nothing to be ashamed of," he whispered into her ear again as he found her hands with his and entwined them together as they settled at her abdomen and he held her close as they stared at her reflection together.

"I just feel like it's the first thing anyone sees when I wear something a little lower cut than normal," Blair admitted.

"It's not what I see," he responded, his voice soft and gentle. "I see the most beautiful and amazing woman with a radiant smile. Anyone that cannot see that isn't worth worrying over."

Blair smiled a little and freed one of her hands to rest on the side of his face, "Thank you."

"I'm going to go kiss the children good night," he told her as he took the hand that was against his face and kissed the inside palm. "Will you be ready in a few minutes?"

"I'm ready now," she nodded as she pulled him with her out of the room and towards their children's bedroom. His assurances were all she needed to boost her confidence.

With a kiss to each cheek for both of their children from each of their parents, they left them in the most trusted care of Dorota as they walked hand in hand towards the elevator.

-d-d-d-d-d-

"Hey," a voice said in Blair's ear as a hand was placed on her shoulder.

"Hi Nate," Blair stated before she turned away from the view of the New York skyline that she'd been enjoying from her place by the floor-to-ceiling windows of the van der Humphrey apartment.

"How'd you know it was me," Nate asked.

"Chuck usually goes for putting his hands on my hips. Besides you've worn the same cologne since we were what, fourteen? It's not that hard to figure out it's you," Blair smiled.

"Do you remember who the first person to give me this cologne was," Nate smiled at her.

"That was another lifetime," Blair said.

"Yes, it was. But it had its moments, didn't it?"

"It did, Nate," Blair assured him. "So, I met Juliet."

"Uh-oh," Nate looked nervous.

"No, I think she's really very pretty and smart and nice."

"Thank you."

"Yes, she's an excellent attempt at making Serena jealous," Blair nailed him with a look.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Blair," Nate stated defensively. "Serena and I had a fight and she decided it's over again. So, it's over."

Blair studied her old friend for a moment and then shook her head, "You are as transparent as this glass, Nate. You brought Juliet here because you knew it would make Serena crazy. So, are you going to tell me what happened?"

"I told you. We had a fight, and she decided it was over. She then proceeded to lock the adjoining door."

"Nate," Blair raised an eyebrow.

"We slept together a few months ago but Serena has been acting a little skittish about the whole couple thing since we got back to the city. I'm not going to put my life on hold while she works through her issues."

"You know Serena. You just have to ride out her fear and it will," Blair stopped talking as the meaning of Nate's words hit her. She then eyed her old boyfriend in abject horror. "Wait a minute. A few months ago Serena was sleeping in my bed. You didn't-tell me you didn't have sex in my bed, Nate."

Nate had that deer caught in the headlights look on his face, "We washed the sheets, I swear."

"Oh God," Blair groaned. "You're going to do more than that, Archibald. You're buying me a new bed. What the hell is wrong with you?

"It was a onetime thing. What is the big deal?"

"The big deal? The big deal is that first of all you brought your ex-girlfriend to a party at Serena's mother's home to make Serena jealous, which is so high school. Second of all you had sex in my bed with my best friend. And third, you ate all the eggplant last night." She doesn't give him a chance to interrupt as she continues to rail on him, "Have you ever heard of boundaries, Nate? God, that's like me and Chuck going at it between your sheets…" Blair trailed off when she remembers that very thing happened one night nearly a year earlier when she and Chuck had been in one of their moods.

"Blair, calm down," Nate said. "We're in public."

"What's going on over here," Chuck asked as he arrived at Blair's side after hearing her raised voice.

"He had sex in my bed," Blair explained.

"With Dorota," Chuck asked in confusion. "That's a little extreme for me, but I guess that Polish accent could be a turn on . . . if you're into that."

"No, not with Dorota. He had sex in my bed with Serena while I was in the hospital."

"You were awake," Nate pointed out.

"So, what was it? A celebration roll in the hay?"

"We just needed something familiar and comforting."

"But in my bed?"

"It was the only one in the house."

"Oh my God. You had to tell me this now? I can't drink because of my medication."

"Perhaps you should up the dose, Beautiful," Chuck suggested.

"Chuck, don't help me," Nate said with an eye roll.

"I am going to go talk to Lily because at least I know she's never had sex in my bed," Blair said before she walked away.

"I'm buying her a new bed, aren't I," Nate asked.

"Yes, you are, because if you don't, Blair might kill you," Chuck patted his friend on the shoulder.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

"Hi Lily," Blair greeted the older woman after waiting for a couple to take their leave.

"Blair," Lily wrapped her up in a hug. "I am so glad you found me. I was afraid with all the people I wouldn't get a chance to talk to you tonight."

Blair spotted Rufus over Lily's shoulder. He was sitting at the bar staring at a drink in front of him. She put a smile on her face because Lily pulled back, "I wouldn't have gone the whole night without seeing you. Of course I have to thank you for throwing this fundraiser in my mom's honor. Cyrus wanted me to pass along his thanks as well. I talked to him this morning and he said he'll be sending over a check in the next day or two."

"Next time you talk to him, let him know how much we all miss him."

"I will," Blair nodded and her eyes bounced off of Rufus for a moment before she gave her attention to Lily again.

"Now, I know the twins are young and that you probably don't want to let them out of your sight for very long but I would dearly love a chance to practice being a grandmother, so I was wondering if I could keep them over for a night."

"You know Lily, these are lovely glasses. But I thought you usually used the ones your mom gave you for parties," Blair said with a tilt of her head. "I always loved that set."

Lily looked at Blair in confusion. The change of subject seemed to come from nowhere. She was asking for a night with her grandchildren and Blair was talking about the crystal.

"Blair, did you hear what I said," Lily asked.

"I did," Blair nodded. "I'm just wondering why you aren't using the glasses you've used for every party you've ever thrown since I can remember. Did they break or something?"

"A few have been broken recently," Lily admitted. Blair's sympathetic nod told her that she was more informed than she was letting on. Lily changed her gaze and her eyes landed on her youngest, who was looking at them curiously. That's when it fell into place. She looked back at Blair, "You've been talking to Eric, haven't you?"

"He comes over to see his niece and nephew at least two or three times a week. We talk about things. I think he's leaning towards Brown for college. He's amazing with kids, Lily. Given the chance, I think he'll make an excellent father one day."

"But he told you about Rufus," Lily pressed.

"He did," Blair nodded. "And Lily, I love you, and I'll never deny you the chance to know your grandchildren, but surely you can see things from my perspective. I do not want to put my children into a situation that might harm them."

"Rufus would never hurt your children," Lily told her quickly.

"Are you sure about that?" Blair bit her lip as she responded.

"Intentionally, he would never hurt them," Lily shook her head.

"But there is always unintentionally," Blair reminded her. "Get him to see someone, Lily. Because if the day ever comes that Eric shows up on our doorstep with a black eye or bleeding, there is nothing that will stop Chuck from ripping Rufus apart and you know that."

"He's grieving," Lily stated defensively. "He lost his daughter after basically banishing her from his life. He's angry. It will pass."

"I pray to God that I will never be in his position but Lily, it's not just you in this house. You have a son who needs protecting. We're all grieving for someone right now, but we're not all lashing out. If you love Rufus as we all know you do, you need to get him to see that his outbursts are not acceptable and he needs help."

Lily forced a smile when she saw Chuck heading towards them, "Hello Charles."

"Everything okay," Chuck asked putting an arm around Blair's waist, his hand on her hip.

"Yes," Blair said, leaning against him. "I was just admiring Lily's taste in stemware. She had to replace a few of her old glasses. They broke recently."

"Are you sure that's all?" Chuck pressed, "Your faces are far too serious to be discussing stemware."

"We're fine," Lily assured him. "I'd like to visit sometime soon and spend some time with my grandchildren. Eric tells me they're amazing."

"Beyond amazing," Chuck smiled widely as the proud father in him came out in full force. It was the greatest joy of his day when he returned home from the office to be greeted by their adorable faces, no matter the mood they were in.

"Lily, why don't you call me tomorrow, and we'll set up a time for you to come over," Blair suggested.

"That's a wonderful idea," Lily nodded. "If you'll excuse me, I've neglected my hostessing duties for far too long."

Chuck watched her walk away and then turned to Blair, "What's going on?"

"Nothing that you need to worry about right now," Blair assured him. "And it's not my place to say anything, okay?"

"If it gets to a place where you can, please tell me," he demanded gently as he kissed her cheek softly.

"I will," Blair nodded. "But while we're talking and alone for the time being, there is something I wanted to discuss with you."

"What is it?"

"Godparents for Sabrina and Sebastian," she said.

"I thought that would be fairly obvious - Serena and Nathaniel," Chuck replied.

"Yes, but there are two children," Blair pointed out. "I also wanted to split them up. Make Serena Sebastian's godmother and Nate Sabrina's godfather."

"I'll agree to that," he nodded, "It will be a big help having a godfather that will agree with my train of thought when it comes to Sabrina's dating habits or at least one that can be easily manipulated to my way of thinking."

"Eric's not just your brother, he's been mine since Serena and I were six so I think he'd be an excellent godfather to our son," Blair continued with a roll of her eyes.

"And a godmother for Sebastian . . ." Chuck prompted her.

"That's where I get stuck. Seriously, would it have been that hard for one of our fathers to knock someone up and give us a sister besides Serena," Blair looked exasperated. "I thought about Lily but she's got the grandma job already."

"Perhaps the godmother that served me well though I never knew it - Anne," Chuck suggested as he watched Anne and Lily chat politely.

"That crossed my mind too," Blair admitted. "But I don't know if she'd say yes."

"What makes you say that?"

"Serena let it slip that her fight with Nate started over Anne's non-involvement in your life after Evelyn died."

"Perhaps this could be her way to make amends," he suggested.

Blair nodded and looked over at the two other women, "If she says no do you have any objections to Dorota?"

"I have no objections whatsoever," he smiled. "She's actually a perfect first choice. Perhaps we should save Anne for the fall back."

Blair smiled back at him and then caught Eric's eye and waved before she looked at Chuck, "Speaking of Eric, how are you two doing lately? I know you've been taking him home after dinner all week. Is it just to make sure he gets there safely or do you two actually have a conversation?"

"Small talk mostly," he replied, "But he did mention that he's having a tough time with Jenny's death. We were pretty rough on her when she was sent back to Hudson."

"Why don't you two do something together next week," Blair suggested. "Do that brotherly bonding stuff you guys were so good at when Bart and Lily first got married."

"I'll mention it to him to see if he's interested," Chuck nodded, "But a night away from you and the children would be difficult."

"Well, not having me and the children around is kind of the point. Take him to dinner or to a strip club or something."

"You want me to take Eric to a strip club?"

"Yes, the kind where the dancers are male because then I don't have to worry about you catching something when some floozy rubs against you."

"I suppose it wouldn't be the first time Chuck Bass made an appearance in a male strip club. Should give Gossip Girl a juicy tidbit to munch on for awhile."

"You're very amusing," Blair told him.

"Yes, I know. So, have you called home yet to check on the twins?"

"Twice," Blair admitted. "I think I'm showing remarkable restraint. Although, Dorota yelled at me in Polish because I woke Ana up."

"She yelled at me in both Polish and English as I woke up all three the last time I called," he chuckled "I didn't know she knew that many English curse words, and I think Vanya has been teaching her a few in Russian."

"And how many times have you called?"

"Three," he admitted sheepishly.

"I thought we weren't going to do this," Blair groaned. "We weren't going to be crazy, obsessive parents."

"I think we need to face the truth, Beautiful. Crazy and obsessive is who we are. We might as well embrace it."

"At least we know we can trust our sitter," Blair said.

"She already raised one amazing daughter," Chuck smiled at her as he rubbed her bare shoulder softly.

Blair blushed at his compliment.

"Would you like to dance, Beautiful?" he held out his hand expectantly.

"I would love to," Blair smiled, taking his hand.


	18. Chapter 18

Merry Christmas Readers. I thank you for reading and I want lots of replies for my Christmas present. I thank my beta for putting up with me.

* * *

Blair stared at the ceiling of the bedroom. Chuck was beside her, and she could tell that he wasn't asleep yet from his breathing.

She was worried.

He hadn't said much since he'd come home from dinner with Eric, and she could literally feel the tension in him.

She had a feeling she knew what had happened as she sat up in bed and turned the light on. She felt his eyes lock onto her.

"Eric told you, didn't he?"

"Told me? Did he tell you?"

Blair put her hand to her forehead and sighed, "He confided in me when I flat out asked him why he didn't seem to want to go home lately."

"When did he tell you this?" Chuck pressed, his eyes searching hers as he sat up.

"About a week before the fundraiser," Blair admitted. "And before you ask, I didn't tell you because Eric asked me not to."

"I don't care what he asked you to do," Chuck snapped, "My families' physical well being is at stake. You should have told me as soon as you found out."

"And run the risk of Eric never coming to either of us when he needed help ever again, I don't think so," Blair shook her head. "I know they're your family and I know you want to protect them. Eric is coming to you now, and what you need to do is be there for him instead of being angry at me."

"You of all people know how much family means to me. You had a duty to tell me."

"Don't take that high and mighty tone with me, Bass," she snarled. "I did what Eric asked me to do. I honored the request of my 'brother'."

"He's not-"

"Yes, he is. Do you have any idea how many weeks on end that he and Serena pretty much lived in my house while Lily was trying out one marriage or another? The only time he didn't come to me was when he was locked up in the Ostroff Center. If you try and turn that around on me, please keep in mind that I didn't know it was him, and I have _never_ forgiven myself for not being there when he needed someone."

Chuck took a deep breath as he began to calm down. "I have a solution, but I need to run it by you first. Eric doesn't feel safe at Lily's right now. You and I are pretty much sharing one room now, which leaves us with a spare room. Perhaps Eric could come stay with us until Lily can get Rufus to seek treatment."

"If you think that you can get Lily to agree to that, I have no problems with it," she said quietly. "You do realize that if he comes to live here, we're going to have to convince him to tell Serena what's going on." She turned so that she could put her chin on his shoulder and picked up his hand in hers.

"For as long as we can, I think we should keep Serena out of this," Chuck told her, "Eric is over here all the time as it is and Serena hasn't gotten suspicious yet. Besides she has her own issues right now as she deals with the reemergence of Nate's psycho ex, Juliet."

"Juliet seemed friendly enough to me the one time I met her," Blair stated in confusion.

"Just wait," Chuck replied, "Give it a little time. Nate will remember why he broke up with her the first time, and we'll get to watch her fly off the handle a second time."

"I thought she dumped him," Blair said. "At least that's what Serena said."

"It was complicated," Chuck responded, "Nate was forcing the issue because he hates to be the bad guy at the end of relationships."

"God, tell me about it," Blair rolled her eyes. "I am pretty sure if I hadn't told him that I didn't need him that night, he never would have done anything."

"I am glad you did," Chuck smiled at her, playing with her fingers.

"Me too," she smiled softly as the night of their first interlude played around in her mind.

"Blair, they're my family as much as you and the twins are," Chuck started.

"I know and I shouldn't have told Eric I wouldn't say anything but I did lay down the law with Lily. She can see the twins as much as she wants but they're not going over there until Rufus gets some help."

"I'll speak to Eric tomorrow," Chuck told her as he caressed her shoulder softly.

Blair nodded and turned Chuck's face to hers before she gave him a soft kiss.

"You were accused of having a stone heart for so many years, but you really have the kindest soul of anyone I've ever met."

"I just needed someone to unlock my heart," he told her gently as he kissed her lips softly once more.

Blair smiled at him as she traced his jaw line gently, "I'll go with you when you talk to Lily."

"Thank you," he whispered as she traced his lips with her fingers.

"Chuck, we don't just have boundaries," Blair reminded him as she recognized the look in his eyes. "I have restrictions, remember?"

"I remember," he nodded, "No sex, but I can still enjoy the taste of your lips. Can't I?"

"Yes," Blair nodded. "But I don't want to torture either of us anymore than we already are."

"Torture is inevitable," he groaned softly, "But it is a sweet torture that I'm willing to endure."

"We should go to sleep. We have a long day tomorrow and if Lily refuses than we are going to have to call in reinforcements."

"We should sleep," he agreed, "But I've never been one for sensibilities when a beautiful woman is lying at my side."

"Chuck, I'm being serious," she laughed lightly.

"I know and I really wish you weren't."

"Well, if it's that tough for you, I can go sleep in my old room," Blair said as she went to swing her legs over the side of bed. Before she could get very far, Chuck snagged her around the waist.

They were both laughing as his lips found hers.

=x=x=x=x=x=

Blair and Chuck got off the elevator at the van der Humphrey apartment and walked towards the living room. Blair glanced at Chuck and saw the apprehension on his face. She slipped her hand into his and squeezed lightly as reminder that he wasn't doing this alone.

He took a moment to kiss her hand softly as they found Lily at the dining room table going over invitation options for a benefit she was organizing.

"Lily," Blair said to announce their presence.

"Blair, Charles," Lily looked surprised. "Did I know you were coming over?"

"No," Chuck replied, "It's a surprise visit."

"A happy surprise at that," Lily smiled as she hugged each one in turn, "Did you bring those adorable children with you?

"Sorry, Serena and Dorota claimed them for a godmother/godchild afternoon," Blair said. "Next time."

"Eric said you and he had a lot of fun the other night," Lily said as they moved to the sofa. "You took him to that Italian restaurant he likes so much."

"Is that what he told you?" Chuck laughed. "Yes, the chicken marsala was excellent. I highly recommend you give it a try, but as part of a girls night out."

Blair scolded him with a look.

"I'm not sure-" Lily looked a bit confused.

"Don't ask Lily," Blair shook her head. "But Eric is why we're here. Is Rufus home?"

"No, he went to the gallery for the afternoon."

"Good," Blair sighed in relief. This was going to go much better if he wasn't here. "Chuck and I have something important that we wanted to talk to you about."

"Is everything alright," Lily looked worried.

"You know that Eric told me what's been going on," Blair started. "He told Chuck the other night."

"Oh," Lily said. "Charles,-"

"Don't defend Rufus right now, Lily," Chuck shook his head as he interrupted an explanation that he didn't want to hear.

"Right now our main concern is for Eric's safety, and he's made it clear to both of us that he doesn't feel safe here right now," Blair began their discussion.

"That's absolutely ridiculous," Lily exclaimed, "He's perfectly safe here with Rufus, as am I."

"Lily, where's the vase that was in the front hall," Blair asked never looking away from her. "I believe that was one of the few wedding gifts from William's mother that you actually kept after the divorce, wasn't it? You said you'd be giving it to Serena when she got married."

"I bumped into the table and it fell off," Lily covered quickly.

"Lily, we all know that's not true," Chuck chimed in. "You don't need to cover for Rufus."

"He's just upset," Lily said. "It's a bad patch."

"One that you shouldn't deal with by yourself. You won't tell Serena. You won't tell Dan. I'm willing to bet you gave Eric hell the other night when you found out he'd told me," Blair shook her head. "You can't keep this quiet forever."

"It's not forever. When Rufus works through his issues, we'll put it all behind us," Lily responded.

"And when will that be," Chuck pressed, "Eric says he's only getting worse. Today it's a crystal vase, tomorrow it's your skull or Eric's skull. You have to do something about this, Lily."

"He's not violent, Charles."

"Yet," Blair amended. "Lily, you have to face facts. Rufus is not going to get better without help."

"You two are making far too much of this," Lily replied. "Eric is just being overly dramatic."

"That may be," Chuck said. "But Eric doesn't want to be here right now. We've agreed to let him live with us."

"Absolutely not," Lily said.

"We aren't here to ask your permission," Chuck responded.

"No, he's seventeen and still a minor. He's not able to make this decision on his own, and I will not let him leave this house," Lily held firm as her face began to flush in anger like neither had ever seen.

"He may be seventeen and still a minor, but he's old enough to know when he doesn't feel safe somewhere and right now he doesn't feel safe in this house," Blair told Lily gently, reminding herself that this was still her best friend's mom and the only grandmother her children had left. "Lily, don't make us take drastic measures."

"Lily, this isn't about you right now," Chuck added, "It's about Eric. He's been shuffled around all his life from one place to the next of each of your marital whims, never once has he felt unsafe like he does right now."

"He is my son," Lily got up from the couch.

"And that's not going to change," Blair told her. "You can spin this anyway you want. Tell people that Rufus and Eric aren't getting along. To give him some space Eric's going to move in with Chuck and me for awhile so you can all have some breathing room. But if you wait until Rufus is so out of control that Eric's calling the police, which is exactly what I told him to do the next time, there's no hiding this. Do you really want to end up on page 6?"

"How dare you two play the high and mighty card with me," Lily snapped.

"Lily, nobody has hit rock bottom as well as I have," Chuck chimed in. "I know what Rufus is feeling, all the anger and pain. I couldn't pull myself out of that pit without help."

"I don't recall you seeing a therapist," Lily snarled.

"Therapy doesn't work for everyone," Chuck replied, "And it isn't even what we're suggesting. Rufus needs help in whichever way works, but ignoring what's going on is not the solution."

"Lily, Eric said yes to living with us," Blair said. "That says something."

"He said yes," Lily echoed.

"He said yes," Blair repeated.

"And if you don't let him come with us, I'm calling Serena and Dan and Cece and whoever else I think might want to know about this and telling them what's going on," Chuck said. "Like Blair said, right now you can spin this whatever way you want. But if you don't let us at least help Eric, I'm telling the family."

"I don't appreciate you threatening me," Lily growled even though Chuck and Blair could see that their words were sinking in.

"That's not my intention," Chuck replied, "I'm just trying to make you see the severity of the situation."

"He said yes," Lily said again. Then she looked at Chuck and Blair, "Be good to him."

"You have our guarantee," Blair replied, "And an open invitation to stop by whenever you'd like."

"I think I'll give him some time. Tell him to call me when he's ready to see me," Lily said. "Excuse me if I don't show you out. I suddenly want to take a nap."

Lily left the room before either of them could stop her.

Chuck made a move to go after her and Blair grabbed his hand, "Think how you'd feel if it were Sebastian. Would you want meaningless comfort right now?"

"I suppose not," Chuck conceded, "I feel horrible about this."

"As do I," Blair agreed, "But we're doing what is best for Eric."

Chuck checked his watch, "School's about over for the day. Let's go get him and tell him the news."

Blair nodded and she and Chuck got to their feet. They walked to the elevator hand-in-hand. Chuck shot a look towards the master bedroom, "Do you think she'll be alright?"

"I do," Blair nodded. "I think this is what she needs."

"Thank you for doing this with me," he replied as he kissed her forehead as they waited for the elevator.

"No thanks are necessary," Blair smiled at him. "It'll be nice to have Eric around again."

"And keep me in check," he laughed softly as her arms came around his neck as she held him close.

Blair smiled as they got into the elevator, "You know you did the right thing, right?"

"Is this what it feels like when the right thing feels wrong even though it's right?" he inquired.

"I'm not really sure," she raised an eyebrow in confusion, "Could you repeat what you just said?"

"Never mind," Chuck shook his head and pulled Blair closer as they rode down in the elevator. "We'll think about it later."

"As I lay in your arms tonight," she replied suggestively as she began nibbling on his Adam's apple.

Chuck could only groan at the feelings she was stirring inside him that he knew he had no outlet, for at least a few months.

"Tease," he mumbled.

"Yes, I am," Blair said. "But you cannot say I'm not a fun tease."

"Hmm, I love you," he hummed as the elevator chimed and they were forced to separate to maintain a respectable distance as they left the building.

"Yes, I love you, too," Blair nodded as they got out in front of the building. "But I think your watch is slow because Eric's here already."

"Eric, your timing is impeccable," Chuck stated, "Blair and I just came from speaking with Lily."

"You did," Eric looked nervous.

Blair disentangled herself from Chuck and went to Eric's side, "We did and if you still want to live with us, it's okay."

"Thank you," Eric responded, his voice, eyes and body posture grateful for the news, "I owe the two of you, big time."

"A few nights of babysitting and we'll call it even," Blair assured him.

"Deal," Eric hugged Blair and then put his hand out to Chuck who surprised him by giving him a hug.

"Your safety is very important to me," Chuck told him, "I hope you know that you can come to me with any problem that you have. I will always be there for you."

"I won't forget this time," Eric nodded. He'd missed having a big brother who could actually take care of him. Dan was okay if you wanted to talk about books but Chuck was there for things that weren't always a lot of fun.

"C'mon. If we hurry we might be able to catch Serena and Dorota in the park with the twins and Ana," Blair smiled.

"I should go start packing," Eric frowned.

"Nonsense," Chuck responded, "Trust me, you want to see those chubby cheeks right now. They'll pull you out of the funk you're in."

"Besides," Blair hooked arms with Eric, "your mom may have said yes, but she's still upset. We should give her some time before you start to pack."

Eric nodded as he stepped into the waiting limo.

"Tell me again," Chuck said as he pulled Blair towards him to halt her entrance into the car.

"It's the right thing to do," Blair repeated. "And I love you."

"I love you," he sighed as he hugged her quickly before they joined Eric in the vehicle.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

"Thank you again for letting me stay here," Eric smiled apprehensively.

"Nothing to thank me for," Blair said as she opened up a box marked 'movies'. "It isn't the first time you've crashed with me, remember?"

"I know," he sighed, "But I thought that when my mother married Rufus that the days of invading your living space were behind us."

Blair pushed the box aside and then put an arm around Eric's shoulders and rested her chin on the shoulder closest to her, "You know what's happening right now isn't your fault right? Just like Jenny wasn't your fault and just like your mom's screwed up theories on what marriage means isn't your fault. And as for invading my living space, you are always welcome."

"Some days this all gets to be too much," he sighed, "But having you, Serena, Chuck, and everyone else that care about me makes this a little easier."

"It's not a charmed life we lead," Blair agreed.

"I know my mom's not really fine with this," Eric said. "Are you sure you want to alienate her?"

"Your mom needs to try and remember that while Rufus is her husband, you are her baby," Blair said. "If something happened to you because she was unwilling to make Rufus face his problems, she'd never forgive herself. In the long run, she'll understand."

"You think so," Eric asked her.

"Yes, I do," Blair nodded. "Now, can you tell me why you have Eight Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter?"

"It was Rufus'. Dan cleaned out the loft and dropped some of his dad's stuff by. I never watched the show but the book's funny," Eric said picking it up and pointing. "The one about having a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind his house could be Chuck."

"Don't you dare give him any ideas," Blair scolded him, "Sabrina is going to have a difficult enough time dating as it is. Besides, there will be no guns in my home."

"How are things going between you and Chuck?" Eric inquired as he unpacked his clothes into the empty dresser and closet Blair made available for him.

"We're okay," Blair nodded. "It's kind of nice being with him without actually being with him, if you catch my meaning."

"You and he haven't . . ." Eric drifted off in embarrassment.

"We have boundaries, and I have restrictions."

"But still, this is Chuck Bass we're talking about. Boundaries and restrictions are usually mild irritants."

"Yes, well I think my dying of a heart attack in the middle of things might put the restrictions front and center."

Eric began laughing, but stopped short at the serious expression on Blair's face. He realized she was being serious.

"God you really did almost die," he said as he sat back down next to her. "How close was it?"

"Another inch or two and Chuck would be a single father."

"Are you surprised at how well Chuck has adapted to fatherhood?" Eric inquired as he looked to change the subject. His life was somber enough at the moment. He didn't want to think about what could have been.

"Yes and no," Blair said. "Yes, because his own mother wasn't there to give him siblings so he wasn't used to kids and no, because I know his ambition was to be better than Bart at everything, including being a human being."

"Does he change diapers?" Eric asked curiously.

"He's rather good at it, believe it or not. He just needed a little practice."

Eric found this bit of trivia hysterical and was nearly doubling over with laughter.

"Hey, what's going on," Chuck stood in the doorway.

"How long have you been home," Blair asked as she got up. "I didn't hear the elevator."

"I just got home," Chuck responded as he stepped in and kissed her cheek softly, "I had to check in on the children first. Eric's laughter brought me in."

"He was surprised to find out that you're quite adept at diaper changing."

"That's supposed to be our little secret, Beautiful," he told her with a little snort of anger.

"Give me a break," Blair said quietly. "I just wanted to make Eric laugh."

"Don't expect me to demonstrate," Chuck warned his brother as his arm snaked around Blair's waist.

"Don't worry. My imagination is quite good," Eric assured him.

"Well, I'm gonna get dinner," Blair said. "Think I'll order in tonight. Any requests?"

"Burgers and fries," Eric said.

"Sounds good to me," Blair nodded. "Chuck?"

"Whatever the two of you would like," Chuck responded.

"Okay, I'll go order. Eric, did you want to keep your movies in here or out in the living room with the entertainment center?"

Eric shrugged his indifference.

"We'll figure it out later," Blair said. "See you both in a bit." She left the room and was followed by Chuck, who shut Eric's door behind him.

"How's he doing," he asked after she'd ordered.

"About as well as expected," Blair replied as she sat in his lap at his encouragement. "I wish this didn't feel like a routine to him."

"Lily's choice of father figures for Serena and Eric has always been questionable. I suppose we all thought that with Rufus she'd finally found a stable male role model for him."

"Even the most stable of individuals can lose it when life throws them a curveball like what Rufus has been thrown," Blair replied.

"Doesn't excuse his behavior," Chuck chimed in.

"I'm not," Blair shook her head. "But think about what you'd do if something ever happened to one of our children."

"I don't know what I'd do," Chuck admitted. "And I hope I never have to find out."

"Me either," Blair sighed as she laid her head on his shoulder. "I think underneath it all Eric feels like he's abandoning Lily."

"He's doing the right thing - the safe thing. Lily can't see it right now, but if Rufus is breaking things, violent physical outbursts could be next. I just hope she gets him help before it gets that far because if I see a bruise by Rufus's hand on her, we'll find out what I'm capable of."

"Chuck, please, keep the children in mind before you do something you cannot undo," Blair requested gently.

"You all are never far from my mind," Chuck promised her. "But she doesn't deserve to have no one in her corner."

"I know," Blair nodded. "What do you think about maybe telling Dan?"

"How do you think Humphrey will handle this?" Chuck inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"I don't know," Blair shook her head. "Dan's grieving too but not to the extent Rufus is and he's got Jonathan to concentrate on. Then again, Dan's his son. Shouldn't he be informed about this?"

"I'll let you make this decision," Chuck responded, "You know him far better than I ever care to."

"Let's get Eric's opinion before we decide on anything."

Chuck nodded as he ran his fingers through her hair.

Blair's fingers ran along his lips. "I haven't properly welcomed you home yet today."

"Properly still has to wait a few months," Chuck teased.

"You know what I mean," she smirked.

"By all means, welcome me home," he encouraged as their lips gravitated towards each other.

Blair smiled as she kissed Chuck sweetly, her hand on the side of his face. When she pulled back, she whispered, "Eric was surprised to hear we're not having sex."

"I'm sure most people are surprised we're not having sex," he chuckled lightly.

"Yes, but Eric didn't know how close it came to going to other way with me," Blair said. "You and Serena were the only ones who knew the extent of my injuries."

"Which is always in my mind when I have thoughts of pushing further. That and the promise I've made to you to go at your pace."

Blair smiled at him tenderly, "You really are a great guy, you know that?"

"With you," he replied as he nuzzled her neck softly.

"Good things come to he who waits," Blair whispered.

"And I know from experience that it will be worth the wait," he smiled, "You always have been."


	19. Chapter 19

I hope everyone had a good Hanukah or Christmas or is having a good Kwanza. I wish everyone a great New Year. My beta is awesome as always. Reply!

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Chapter 19

Chuck entered the dining room to see Blair setting the table for Eric, herself, and Chuck. She set down a plate of waffles on the table before she saw him watching her.

"Morning," she smiled as she hugged him half-heartedly.

"Good morning," he said. "Where'd you go this morning? I went to take a shower and when I came back you were gone."

"I heard Sabrina on the monitor."

"You should've gotten me. You were up late with her." He frowned as he noted her tired posture.

"I'm okay," Blair smiled.

Chuck nodded as he sat down, "Something smells good."

"It's chocolate and banana waffles," she told him.

"Waffles," Eric asked as he came in and sat down. "Blair, did you become a Humphrey and not tell us?

"Funny," Blair said as she pattered around the dining room so she wouldn't have to sit and eat. She wasn't the slightest bit hungry this morning.

The boys exchanged a look and Chuck spoke up, "You're quiet this morning."

"Just tired," Blair waved it off. "Sabrina's being a princess lately.

"I can watch her if you want since there's no school today," Eric offered.

Blair smiled at him, "I may take you up on that. I forgot the juice. I'll be right back."

Chuck got up without a word to his brother and followed Blair into the kitchen, letting the door swing shut behind him.

Pinning her against the counter, he put his arms on either side of her as she turned back to him.

"What's going on," he demanded, thinking perhaps it was something he had done that upset her.

"Chuck, I'm fine. I'm just tired. You know that the doctor said that if my sleeping patterns get interrupted I'd get sleepier than normal."

"Are you sure," he pressed as his body slid into hers further, savoring the feel of her against him. "If I've done something wrong, please tell me."

"You've done nothing wrong," Blair promised as she stroked his chest lightly. "You've been wonderful. Perfect even."

"I can stay home today with you and the children," he offered, "Perhaps we should have a family outing - show them the city they're lucky enough to call home."

"You have that important business meeting today," she reminded him. "You can't play hooky."

"Nothing is more important to me than the three of you," Chuck told her.

"And we love you too. But if we were to do something today, I might end up falling asleep somewhere in the middle of it."

"Then I'll stay home so you can catch up on your rest," he offered. "Business can wait a day."

"Seriously, Bass, that's such a sweet offer, but go to work. I'll be fine with the children today. Maybe I'll take Eric up on his babysitting offer and take a walk or something."

"Call me if you change your mind," Chuck told her. "I can be home in less than ten minutes if need be."

"I know," Blair smiled at him. "And if I need you, I will call you. Now, go eat your breakfast."

Chuck studied her for a few moments. Her eyes were telling him she was holding something back, but also to just let whatever it was go. He kissed her softly before he pulled away, entwining their fingers together and pulled her back to the table.

"Everything okay," Eric asked as he ate his waffles.

"Yes, Eric. We're fine," Blair told him as she took a seat.

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The intercom buzzed just as Chuck was sitting back down after seeing his guests to the elevator.

"Yes, Grace," he said pressing the button.

"Mrs. Humphrey is holding for you."

"Thank you," Chuck pressed another button and picked up the phone. "Lily?"

"Hello Charles," Lily's voice said warmly.

"Is everything alright?"

"Everything's fine. I was just wondering how Blair was today. I called over to the hotel, but Eric said that was watching the children, so Blair could take a walk. Though that doesn't surprise me. It can't be an easy day for her; the first birthday after her mother's gone," Lily said. "I think I locked myself in my room the first time my father's birthday came after he'd died."

"Today is Eleanor's birthday," Chuck realized as the missing piece to this morning's puzzle finally came into view. "How could I have forgotten?"

"Blair didn't say anything," Lily concluded in surprise. Since the pair began cohabitating, there were no secrets between them. She was surprised that Blair hadn't confided her feelings about today to him.

"No, she just said she was tired," Chuck said. "You said she wasn't at the penthouse?"

"Eric told me she went for a walk."

"Damn it," he cursed himself, "She shouldn't be alone today. That's a recipe for disaster."

"Speaking from experience," Lily chimed in.

"I can't tell you how hard it was when Bart's birthday rolled around the first time after he'd died," Chuck shook his head. "But Blair wouldn't let me be alone and I'm not going to let her."

"Take care of her, Charles." Lily instructed him gently.

"That's my plan," Chuck said. "Thank you for calling Lily."

"Give Blair my best," Lily told him before they hung up.

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Chuck didn't say anything as he approached Eleanor's grave. He could see Blair sitting in front of the stone, knees up to her chest. He reached her and sat down behind her, uncaring that his pants would probably be ruined. Blair felt him and leaned back against his chest.

"How'd you know where I was," she asked.

"Lily reminded me what today was," he spoke softly into her ear as he wrapped his arms around her. "She'd called the house looking for you. When she said that Eric told her you went out, I came here. I figured you were either here or out feeding the ducks. This was the first stop."

"It doesn't seem right," Blair said. "It's her birthday and she's not here. I've been sitting here trying to figure out why."

"You'll make yourself crazy if you keep spinning yourself into these circles," Chuck told her. "There is no figuring any of this out. What happened was a horrible tragedy. There is no making sense of any of it."

"This wouldn't have happened if I'd met her somewhere else or met her sooner," Blair said softly.

"Don't," Chuck said. "Don't do this to yourself."

"It's my fault," Blair replied as the tears began to fall.

Chuck turned her face to him, "No, it's not. You didn't fire a gun at her."

"If I hadn't left town she wouldn't have come to see me."

"And if I hadn't broken your heart like I did or gotten you pregnant you wouldn't have left to begin with," Chuck stated, "If you need to blame someone, blame me."

"Yeah, right. I can't blame you," Blair scoffed.

"And I'm not going to let you blame yourself," Chuck told her.

"Who can I blame them?" she demanded, "I need to blame someone."

"Blame the scum who came into your cafe, robbed you, shot you and left you to die, and took your mother's life."

"I don't even know who that is," she cried.

"I'm trying to find out," Chuck confessed. "I'm not letting this go, Blair. I will find whoever it was that hurt you and took your mother."

"Revenge isn't healthy, Chuck. It nearly destroyed us more than once," Blair reminded him.

"It's not revenge. It's someone getting what they deserve for murder and attempted murder. It's a foreign concept, but I believe it's called justice."

"Just make sure it doesn't consume you," Blair tilted her head back on his shoulder. "It may have been a long time ago but I do still remember what Bart was like when he got something stuck in his craw."

"Stuck in his craw?" Chuck bit his lip to keep from laughing. "Is that something you picked up in Jersey?"

"Cyrus actually," Blair said quietly.

"Did he call today," Chuck asked.

"He called," she nodded slightly, "But I couldn't force myself to answer the phone."

"Do yourself a favor and call him soon," Chuck said. "He loves you as if you were his flesh and blood. Don't let him drift out of your life."

"You know he really likes you, right?"

"I know," he nodded, "When I make you happy anyways."

"No, I think he likes you even when you piss me off," Blair smiled. "He's always been in your corner. Even when I tried making things work with Nate senior year, I think a little part of him wanted me to give you another shot."

"Because I'm your other half," he replied, "If we look at what we are together, we're amazing. We're happy together, we're miserable apart."

"You know I think if he'd known you were in my room the night he married my mom, he would've sent everyone home and holed up with us that night," Blair smiled. "We should visit him when I can fly."

"I'll have the jet on standby," he agreed.

"I just really hope he hasn't attempted to pack up any of my mom's things by himself. He shouldn't do it alone," Blair said thoughtfully. "Maybe I should have Daddy drop in on him."

"I'm sure he could do with the company," Chuck nodded.

"Aaron was staying with him but life goes on, you know," Blair's gaze fell on the stone again. "Then again, sometimes it doesn't."

"Blair," he caressed her cheek softly. "I know how hard this day is. Don't bury these emotions for me. Let them out."

Blair broke down in heart breaking sobs against his shoulder

x-x-x-x-x-x

It had been a long day, Blair decided as she pulled on a long sleeve T-shirt to go with the flannel pajama pants that Eric had given her while she was in the hospital. She looked up when Chuck came in.

"Did Sabrina go back down," she asked as she pulled back the covers.

"Yes," Chuck nodded as he studied her outfit.

"What," she looked down at herself.

"I'm having a flashback," he explained with a smile as he unbuttoned his cuffs and then his shirt.

"To what," Blair inquired.

"Your warning about loaning out your lingerie," Chuck smirked.

"God, that was a long time ago," Blair smiled as the memory returned to her as freshly as the day it happened.

"Yes, it was. But I have an answer."

"An answer to what," Blair raised an eyebrow.

"I definitely like you in flannel," Chuck smiled.

"Good to know," Blair smiled at him again before she knelt on the bed and motioned for him to join her.

Chuck sat next to her and looked up, "What is it?"

"I was thinking about something you said in the cemetery today."

"Which part?"

"You were trying to keep me from blaming myself and you told me to blame you for breaking my heart or for getting me pregnant. There's something I want you to know."

"What's that?"

"I was terrified when I found out I was pregnant. I think the last time I was that scared was when we were in high school and I just _thought_ I was pregnant. But you need to know that I have never regretted deciding to have them and that I've never been sorry it happened."

"Do you mean that," Chuck asked.

"Yes. I wish we'd been together when I found out, but I knew that I was keeping them and one of the reasons was that even if we were never together again, I'd always have a part of you with me."

"I love you," Chuck told her as he pulled her down for a kiss.

"I love you, too," she whispered before their lips met.


	20. Chapter 20

Here is the latest chapter. I hope you all enjoy it. My beta is awesome.

Blair turned over in bed towards the window and smiled at the sight that greeted her.

Chuck and the twins were on the floor enjoying tummy time in the sunlight streaming through the windows.

"Good morning," she said quietly so as not to disturb the tableau of father and child time that was happening.

Chuck looked up and smiled at her, "Good morning. Did we wake you?"

Blair sat up in bed, "No. Not at all. Though I wish you had."

"I thought you could use the additional sleep after week we've endured."

Blair smiled and nodded, "Have they eaten already?"

"Yes. Eric helped me feed them and then he headed out to meet up with Elliot."

"Have you had Elliot checked out yet by your PI," Blair asked swinging her legs over the side of the bed and pushing away the covers.

"He's a good guy, Blair. I promise," Chuck nodded.

"Good. Eric hasn't had the best luck with guys and I just want to be sure he's got a good one this time. He deserves it."

"He does. As a matter of fact, Eric wants to bring him to dinner sometime soon. Apparently Elliot's been asking to meet more of Eric's family and since Eric doesn't want to push his luck with Rufus right now, he asked if he could bring Elliot to meet us."

"I'd love that," Blair nodded as she stood up. She looked out the window to the cloudless sky. "It looks like a beautiful day out."

"It's supposed to be," Chuck nodded.

"Good. Let's do something fun today," she proposed as she bent down next to the trio on the floor.

"Just you and me," Chuck questioned.

"No. On my mom's birthday you offered to stay home and take us all on an outing. I'd like to cash in that rain check today."

"Okay. What would you like to do?"

"Let's go on a picnic," Blair suggested as she tickled Sebastian's stomach, drawing out a tiny laugh.

"A picnic," Chuck raised an eyebrow.

"Yes," Blair nodded. "We could go to Central Park and feed the ducks and then ourselves."

"Alright but I would like to propose an alternate destination," Chuck smiled sinisterly.

"I don't think I like that smile. Where are you planning on taking us?"

"It's a surprise. You'll love it, I promise."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"This is definitely one of your weirder ideas, Bass," Blair said as she put down Sabrina's carrier and sat down on the steps next to it.

"I happen to think it's one of my more ingenious ideas," Chuck told her as Sebastian's carrier was set down next to Sabrina's as he chose his perch directly next to Blair.

"The Met steps," Blair questioned as she looked around, memories of their high school days flooding back to her.

"I think it's important for the children to know a little about their parents' history. See Sebastian, this is where Mommy used to hold court," Chuck smirked as he stroked his cheek softly.

"Don't start all that nonsense just yet," Blair rolled her eyes. "We have a few years before they need to know about our faults."

"So, when do I get to tell them the limo story?"

"Not until they're…never," Blair looked at him sternly.

"They'll see our faults soon enough," Chuck sighed, "Hopefully it will be later than when we realized our parents were far from perfect."

"I was six. How old were you," Blair asked.

"I think I was around the same age," Chuck looked at her surprised. "I never figured you for thinking your dad was less than perfect before he moved out."

"It was right about then that I realized he didn't look at Mom the way the Captain looked at Anne."

"Just the same, we have a few years before they need to know we're flawed," Chuck replied, "Besides, you holding court was not a flaw. It was asserting your authority."

"God, I really was the little power monger, wasn't I," Blair asked as she reclined against the step she sat in front of. "Not one of my better qualities."

"I disagree," he smirked devilishly, "The little power monger in you is one of my favorite traits especially when you assert your dominance over me."

"You have a one track mind," she rolled her eyes. "How are you managing during this sexual outage you're currently experiencing? Your hand must be cramping up."

"Very amusing," Chuck glared at her. The truth in her statement was something he wasn't going to admit to. "But I happen to know there are some things in life worth waiting for."

"You know I was thinking, when we get the okay from the doctor, and we decide it's the right time, maybe we should go back to the beginning."

"The limo?" he inquired.

"I'd like us to begin again where we began in the first place," Blair nodded. "What do you think?"

"Are you sure? That might be a little adventurous for your first sexual encounter after major heart surgery."

"I will ask how crazy we're allowed to get," Blair assured him. "If the doctor says to take it slow, then maybe we can get a hotel room like we should've been doing after prom, if we'd gone with each other."

"We should have," he nodded with a slight frown.

"Ah, if only we had a time machine," Blair smiled.

"I'd use it for a lot more than just prom," he laughed.

"Would you change the night I surrendered my virtue to you," she asked quietly.

"Not on your life," Chuck shook his head.

"I wouldn't either," she smiled as she leaned over to kiss his cheek softly.

"I might change the morning after," Chuck admitted. "I'd get to your house earlier than I did and keep you from going to confession."

"Breakfast would have been nice," she smiled.

"Things would've been different," Chuck said quietly.

"I don't know why I tried so hard to hang on to Nate for so long after that. Even after I found out about him and Serena, I just couldn't seem to let go."

"Because it was part of your perfect little world," he replied. "I wasn't."

"You are now," she smiled.

"I'm far from perfect, Blair," Chuck told her. "All the things I did-"

"They're done. We can't erase them," Blair cut him off. "But we're moving on from them. I promised you that I would never bring Jenny up again. Now I'm making the same promise about Jack. It hurt but it's over with. He can't hurt us if we don't let him."

"You're being too easy on me," he frowned.

"No, I'm not," Blair shook his head. "Chuck, I almost died. Literally. I almost left this world and if I had the last thing that would've happened between us would've been a fight. Being mad isn't worth it if the last things a person hears from someone they love are angry words. Life is too short.

"I have two choices in all of this. Either I hate you for the rest of my life, which I found to be exhausting and pointless after months of trying, or I move on from it and try to find a way to forgive you. I choose forgiveness because I love you. I'm not saying I've forgiven you yet, but I'm about as far away from hating you as I can get.

"And in addition to all of that, I'm not the only one who almost left this world after a fight," Blair reminded him. "My mom and I were okay when she died. So, while I am always going to feel a little guilty that she never laid eyes on her grandchildren or got to hold them, I know she and I were in a place that had we had just a little more time she would've been able to do both. When you and I were shot, neither of us was in a good place with the other. And if Serena had come back that day and told me that it was your body on that slab in the morgue, I don't know what I would've done."

"We've both had that moment," Chuck replied as he lifted her hand to his lips, savoring the feel of her steady pulse against his lips. "It's the worst feeling in the world."

"You know the night Dan told me you'd been shot," Blair began as she pulled out two bottles of water with her free hand from the basket that Dorota had put together at Blair's request, "I came so close to picking up the phone and calling you, if only to hear your voice on the other end."

"I wish you had," he replied.

"Looking back, so do I," Blair admitted, turning her hand so she could brush a finger across Chuck's cheek.

"I should have," she smiled. "One of the millions of things I'd change if we had that time machine."

"But not the children," he added as Sabrina chose that moment to gurgle.

"No, never them," Blair smiled. "The part where I cut my mom off, yes. But I'd never change having them."

"I've been meaning ask you something," Chuck said.

"Okay," Blair said with a nod.

"Why Rose?"

"What do you mean?"

"Sabrina's middle name," Chuck elaborated. "Why Rose? Why not something for your mom or dad?"

"Well, like Serena told you I gave Sebastian the middle name Nathaniel because at the end of the day, you and Nate are always going to be there for one another. Sabrina in addition to being from one of my favorite movies, is also close enough to Serena that it honors her as well."

"Right," Chuck nodded.

"I used Rose because Cyrus always thought you were right for me and he's been a father to me in a lot of ways the last few years. Even when I didn't want him to be he was and I knew he'd love being a part of their lives so when I was deciding on names, I decided that Rose would go very well with Sabrina. But also it was a way to honor my mother, but not as obvious. She did take his last name when they married."

"That's true," Chuck nodded.

"It's such a beautiful day," Blair sighed happily as she looked up at the vibrantly blue sky. "A perfect day for the twins to be outside."

"It's a perfect day for all of us to be outside," Chuck corrected her. "And I'm glad we are all here together."

"Me too," she smiled as she reached out to rock Sabrina's carrier.

"So, what else did Dorota pack for us," Chuck peered over Blair's shoulder into the basket.

"Sandwiches," Blair said. "There are chips and pretzels. And for dessert, tiramisu."

"Sounds perfect," Chuck smiled.

"I'm sorry I never sought your input in naming our children," she added as she returned to their previous conversation.

"I would never have insisted on naming our children after my father and as for Sebastian, I think giving him the middle name of Nathaniel is a way of honoring both my friendship with him and my mom's friendship with Anne," Chuck told her. "You have nothing to worry about."

"Still it's one of those silly little fights that we should have had that I denied you."

"That's right," Chuck nodded. "The dreaded 'what should we name our children' fight. You did fine on your own. I knew I'd always get a daughter named Audrey or Holly or Sabrina out of you. As for Sebastian's name, I've always been fond of our days as scheming partners. The name fits him just fine."

"I'm sorry anyway," she pouted as she rested her head against his shoulder.

"No apology necessary," he assured her.

"Chuck, say you had a time machine at your disposal, what would you fix besides the morning after our first time and me calling the night Dan told me you'd been shot?"

"I'd fix the day of your cotillion," he said without hesitation. "I'd go back and erase the whole Carter Baizen debacle. I'd refuse to help Nate find out who you were seeing. I want to say I'd tell him the truth but even now, I don't think I would. But I would prove to you that I could behave myself."

"Do you think we would have stayed together if it wasn't for that incident?"

"I don't know," Chuck shook his head. "But I do know that if it hadn't happened, you probably wouldn't have slept with Nate that night."

"Yes, you definitely would have been sharing my bed that night," she smiled, "As you had almost every night prior to that since my birthday."

"I think that was the first time I'd ever truly wanted to rip Nate apart," Chuck admitted. "No, wait. It was the second. The first time was when I realized he'd cheated on you."

"You mean when you saw him cheat on me," she corrected him.

"That too," Chuck said. "You know things would've been a lot different if I'd just told Nate I didn't have any luck with finding out whom you were seeing."

"I know," she nodded. "If there was only one thing that you could change with our magical time machine what would it be?"

"I'd sign over my hotel to Jack, and simply walk away from it. You and I would never have parted, and I would have been there for every second of the lives of these perfect little beings."

His response was instantaneous. He must have been giving this a lot of prior thought.

"What about you," Chuck asked curiously. "If there was only one thing you could change with our magical time machine, what would it be?"

"I'd go back and not go to the cotillion with Nate as friends or anything else. I'd just tell him that it was over between us and that I'd found that life could be good with someone who knew me better than he ever could. Someone who could be sweet but also a little devious and someone who took the time to kiss my shoulder when he was apologizing."

"I wish for that too," he smiled.

"I'm aware that you still do that now, too, you know," Blair said. "I know you think I'm asleep most of the time when you do it but I feel it through the pajama top I'm wearing. You kiss my shoulder before you get out of bed in the morning."

"I didn't know you knew about that," he blushed slightly in embarrassment.

Blair smiled at him and trailed her perfectly manicured finger along his jaw line, "I love that you still do that. It's one of the best things about you and me."

"I was thinking that was Sabrina and Sebastian," he nodded towards their children.

"They are the best things that came from you and me," Blair corrected as she leaned forward so their foreheads were touching. "But all the little things we still do for each other like when I lay on the bed with your head on my stomach and I run my fingers through your hair and I lightly scratch your scalp with my nails. I know you love that. Or when we sit on the couch after dinner and you rub my feet without me asking you to. I happen to love that. Chuck, so much of what we've always meant to one another has been beyond words. These little gestures are just part of it. It doesn't matter if it's a foot rub or hands through hair or a kiss to the shoulder before you get up to face the day. It's all part of us."

"Don't forget the passionate love that we make," he smirked in response.

"There is that," Blair smiled. "But tell me you know what I mean."

"I do," Chuck nodded. "And for the record, I feel it when you squeeze my hand just before you fall asleep at night."

"See," Blair smiled. "Wordless meaningful gestures. We're full of them."

-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair unlocked the doors to the balcony and stepped out after she opened them. The sun had set a few hours ago and the city lights sparkled before her.

It was different doing this here than it was doing it out her New Jersey apartment window, she mused. When she leaned out of her window she could watch the sleepy street start to rise. Here, it wasn't until the sun went down that the city really seemed to awaken.

She rested her hands on the railing and leaned forward a bit. She could just hear the music coming from an open window a few floors down but other than that it was relatively quiet. There were no horns honking or people shouting. She could almost just believe that those things didn't exist.

And with the quiet came the thought she'd been trying to push back for most of the day. She did a good job of distracting herself for most of the day but when the twins were asleep and Chuck was doing work or talking to Eric. Thoughts of her mom came up from the back of her mind and everything around her stopped and the ache in her heart that had nothing to do with the bullet that had invaded her body.

Her eyes closed as she felt Chuck's arms around wrapped around her from behind.

"It's not warm enough for you to be out here without a jacket," he whispered. "It's only the beginning of May."

"I'm okay," she said quietly.

"You're in your pajamas," he countered. "Come back inside."

"I'm just thinking. It's quiet out here."

"What are you thinking about?"

"My mom," Blair admitted hesitantly.

"Do you want to talk about it," Chuck asked.

"No," Blair told him. "I know it would help to talk about it, but I don't want to."

"I'm here whenever you need me," he told her as he tightened his arms around her.

"I know," Blair nodded as she tilted her head back against his chest. "And I love you for it."

"It's so quiet here," Chuck observed.

"It's hard to believe that just a few hundred feet or so below us is a maze of streets and tunnels with taxis and subways," Blair smiled. "You could almost believe that it doesn't exist."

"It doesn't exist in moments like this," he told her as he nuzzled at the nape of her neck.

"Just a king and queen overlooking a peaceful kingdom," Blair mused. "It's kind of nice to drift away on thoughts like that."

"You always did like fairytales," Chuck teased.

"Because they have the happy endings at the end," she added.

"Well, I'm no prince," Chuck reminded her gently.

"No, more of a dark knight," Blair turned to him. "I kind of like that about you."

"The dark knight isn't considered a hero," he reminded her.

"Doesn't matter to me," she smiled, "Because you're a hero to me and our children."

"Blair," Chuck whispered as he pushed her hair back.

"Nate was supposed to be my prince. Only he got it on with my lady-in-waiting," Blair reminded him. "And somehow I can't see him sitting with me in a graveyard on my mother's birthday holding me as I cried. Let Cinderella and Snow White and Sleeping Beauty have their prince. I'll take the tortured dark knight."


	21. Chapter 21

Thanks for reading. I want to hear from everyone who signed up for alerts.

As always my beta is amazing.

-x-x-x-

Chuck walked into the penthouse and put down the mail and his briefcase. He could smell something marvelous cooking from the kitchen and followed the scent.

"Whatever you're making smells amazing," he complimented Blair who was currently drizzling icing over a pound cake.

"I'm so excited for our dinner party," Blair smiled, her eyes lit up in excitement. "This is the first time anyone other than you and Eric get to taste my cooking."

"So, what are we having," Chuck came further into the kitchen.

"I decided to keep it simple. We are having macaroni and cheese because I know Eric loves it and turkey meatloaf because apparently Elliot is a health nut though he's not a vegetarian. But for dessert we have having chocolate pound cake to make everyone else happy."

"Lucky for us," he smiled as he stepped in behind her and put his arms around her waist as he nipped at her earlobe playfully.

"Stop it," she scolded him. "I am trying to put icing on this cake."

"I'd rather put the icing on you."

"I wonder if this is what it's like to walk in on your parents," Eric said from the doorway.

"Eric," Blair gasped as she quickly nudged Chuck away.

Eric began chuckling at how flustered she looked, her cheeks blushing crimson as any possible response was lost between her brain and her throat. Chuck quickly joined in laughing.

"If you two don't start behaving yourselves, you won't get any dessert," Blair said snapping a dishtowel at the boys.

Chuck caught the towel in the air and gave it a tug, pulling her into his arms as he kissed her soundly on the lips.

"No dessert for you," Blair scolded him as she shrugged out of his grasp.

"And I'm sure you'll keep your word on that," Chuck said with a smile. "What time does everyone get here?"

Blair checked her watch, "Fifteen minutes. Go change. Eric, can you set the table?"

"After I look in on the children," Chuck nodded as Eric disappeared to do as Blair requested.

"Don't you dare wake them up, Bass," Blair warned him, "Or you can forget about more than just dessert. I just got them down."

"I'll be as quiet as a mouse," Chuck promised.

"You better be," Blair frowned at him. "Do you want wine with dinner?"

"No, I'll be sober with you."

"You don't have to do that, you know," she told him, though his offer warmed her heart.

"It's not as hard as I thought it'd be," Chuck admitted. "It's different going to bed without a clouded head, but it's kind of nice too."

Blair took a step towards him and kissed his lips lightly. "Just for that, dessert is back on your plate."

"Thank you," Chuck smiled. "I'll be back in a minute."

"Blair, thank you so much for agreeing to host this party," Eric stated as he returned to the kitchen after setting the table.

"No thanks necessary," Blair smiled.

"Remember, Serena can't know that I'm staying here," Eric reminded her.

"Not to worry, Little E, Chuck and I had this conversation this morning. It's your news to tell. We'll keep quiet for as long as you want us to."

"You two have done so much for me. I can't even begin to thank you," Eric responded gratefully.

"Stop thanking us," Blair smiled as she touched his shoulder softly. "We're family. It's what we do for each other."

Eric gave Blair a hug and she held him tight, thinking about the little boy that used to watch movies with her while Serena was sleeping off whatever nightly activities she'd been involved in. She'd told Chuck the truth. Eric was her brother too, in every way that counted. She just wished he'd come to her before Lily had found it necessary to stick him in the Ostroff Center.

"Before everyone gets here, have you talked to your mom lately," Blair asked as they walked out into the living room.

"Earlier today," Eric nodded, "She calls just about every day trying to convince me to come home."

"And what do you say?" she inquired.

"I ask if Rufus is getting any better? And if she's getting him any help?" he replied.

"What is her response?" Blair asked curiously.

"Mom always did denial very well. There is no problem until someone has cut their wrists or…" his voice trailed off at the thought of what Rufus could do to his mother during one of his fits of rage.

"I know you're worried about her," Blair frowned. "I am too. I love your mom just as much as I loved my own."

"Yeah but when it comes to getting people help, I don't think Eleanor would wait for people to start breaking things," Eric said.

"No, but she did shut herself off for a long time after my dad left and while some of it was embarrassment, a lot of it was being afraid of putting herself out there again. Look at all it took for your mom to let Rufus back into her life. Then she almost lost him all over again with that whole thing with your dad. Lily's got a lot of stubborn in her. I think she gets it from Cece."

"Must be where Serena gets it from," Eric stated with a hint of sarcastic amusement in his eyes.

"Probably," Blair nodded. "We know it's where Serena got her wild child ways from."

"Very true," Eric laughed.

"Look who's awake," Chuck stated as he entered the living room with Sabrina babbling in his arms.

"Chuck Bass, your dessert is going in the trash right now," Blair scolded him.

"I didn't wake her," he assured her, "Her little eyes were wide open when I bent over to look in on her. I brought her out here so she wouldn't wake up Sebastian."

"Sabrina Rose, you're supposed to be asleep," Blair groaned as she took her from her father's arms.

"She just didn't want to miss all the excitement," Chuck grinned.

"You need to go change," Blair told him. "A three piece suit isn't appropriate for a casual dinner. Eric, listen for the timer on the stove and the elevator while I go get this one back to sleep."

"You got it, Blair," Eric nodded, knowing better than to argue with Blair.

Sabrina continued to babble as Blair followed Chuck into their bedroom where he began to change as Blair sat on their bed and rocked their daughter to sleep as she sang to her softly.

"I love listening to you sing," Chuck whispered as Sabrina's eyes began to flutter close as she tried to fight her exhaustion.

"Then you should sit in the cafe after I close up," Blair smiled. "I always sing along with whatever is still playing on the stereo."

"Any thoughts of returning to it?" he inquired curiously. "Dan's doing an adequate job, but is he a permanent solution?"

"That's a conversation for a different day," she replied.

"Fair enough," he agreed as he came out in only a pair of casual dress pants. A simple button down shirt was in his hands. His bare chest was exposed to her.

He bit back a sarcastic retort as she eyed him, her eyes darkening as the lust began to pool inside them.

"We should open up the balcony doors," Blair said after a moment. "I'm feeling a little overheated."

"Really," Chuck asked.

"Yes. It must be because I have the oven on."

"That must be it," he agreed though his eyes were telling a different story just like hers.

"She's asleep again," Blair whispered as she stood up carefully. "I'm going to go put her back down. See you in the living room."

He nodded as he watched her turn to leave. Just before she was out the door she turned back towards him. Her lips found his in a slow sweet kiss that left them both dizzy as they pulled away.

"I-uh," Blair smiled. "I better get her back to her room before Serena gets here and demands to hold her."

"Good idea," he nods as his fingers flow through her perfectly curled strands.

"Right. So I'm going," Blair backed away slowly. "And just remember that there is a child in the room and our brother is less than ten feet away."

"Is that supposed to be a deterrent?" he chuckled lightly, "I'd take you anyway I could right now, if it wouldn't jeopardize your health and recovery."

"Heart attack, Bass," Blair told him. "Potentially fatal."

"Keep repeating that," he groaned as he fought to keep his urges at bay. As she disappeared from the room, her words did indeed repeat over and over in his head.

As he tried to put his shirt on, he realized his hands were shaking. Having Blair by his side kept his nightmares at bay but even she couldn't erase the images that flashed through his mind of what could have been if that damn bullet had gone a few inches in the wrong direction.

He felt tears began to pool in his eyes as he took a few shaky steps towards their bed to sit down before his legs gave way.

The panic attacks were coming less often, but they were still there for the both of them.

In the night when he woke up for no reason he was calmed by the feel of Blair's hand on his shoulder or the sound of her steady breathing. But when he was alone and her presence wasn't tangible it was a struggle to get himself under control.

Suddenly her voice could be heard from the living room as Elliot must have just arrived.

After a few cleansing breaths, he was able to get his shirt buttoned.

He brushed a hand down his front and pasted on a smile to go and greet his brother's boyfriend.

-x-x-x-x-

"This is really good, Blair," Nate said in surprise as he chewed the macaroni and cheese.

"Yeah," Serena agreed, "I had no idea you were capable of such culinary masterpieces."

Blair beamed with pride from ear to ear.

"Actually, I think Eric should be the real judge since macaroni and cheese is his favorite," Blair said. "So, Eric, what do you think?"

"Amazing," Eric responded instantly, "Easily the best I've ever tasted."

Blair winked at him in reply.

"Thanks for making the meatloaf with turkey meat," Elliot said.

"No problem. Eric said you ate healthy, so I thought I'd accommodate you," Blair smiled. "But I did make chocolate pound cake for dessert. I hope that's okay."

"I indulge on occasion," Elliot assured her, "And if it's half as delicious as the rest of this meal, I'd be a fool not to."

"You certainly would," Chuck chimed in as he reached for Blair's hand and kissed it lightly.

"You should try this sour cream pound cake that she makes," Eric said. "It's beyond amazing."

"Why has my little brother been treated, when I have not," Serena pouted.

"Because he's over here spoiling his niece and nephew more often than you do," Chuck responded quickly.

"And that means he gives up a lot of his free time, so Elliot, I have to say sorry for monopolizing so much of Eric's time. Please know you are more than welcome to come over with him anytime you want."

"I may just take you up on that. Eric keeps bragging about how adorable his niece and nephew are. I'd like to see so for myself," Elliot responded.

"Unfortunately, it's well past their bedtime tonight," Blair responded, "But you're always welcome."

"Thank you," Elliot nodded.

Just as Blair was about to offer more wine to Serena and Nate, the elevator dinger announcing someone's presence. Chuck got up from the table and went into the living room.

"Rufus, what are you doing here," he asked.

"I came to talk to Eric," Rufus snarled. "Lily and I have had enough of his childishness. It's time that he came home."

Meanwhile, Blair had gotten up from the table when she heard Chuck greet Rufus and come to the doorway. She looked back at Eric and Elliot, "Why don't you two go on into Eric's room for a while?"

"Blair, are you sure?"

"We'll be okay," she nodded as her maternal instinct kicked in.

Serena stared at the two of them, "What's going on?"

"Not now Serena," Blair shook her head.

"Blair, what is Rufus talking about?" Serena pressed, "Why would Eric need to come home? He already lives there."

"Not now, Serena," Blair hissed.

"Rufus, you're drunk," Chuck declared as he watched him take a few stumbling steps. "And this is my home. I'm asking you to leave."

"Not without my stepson," Rufus demanded.

"Blair, call security," Chuck told her as he stepped into Rufus's way as he advanced further into their home.

"Rufus, please do as Chuck asks," Blair said. "Don't make us have you removed."

"Where's Eric?"

"He and Elliot are in another room," Blair said. "Now, are you going to go on your own or am I calling security?"

"Give me my stepson!" Rufus demanded as he shoved Chuck out of his way.

Blair grabbed the phone and dialed security as Chuck stumbled backwards while trying to regain his balance, "This is the penthouse. I need security right now."

Chuck reached out to try to subdue Rufus when he picked up a crystal vase that Chuck had given Blair a few weeks ago with her favorite pink peonies.

Blair let out an involuntary scream as the glass shattered against the wall missing Serena who had just entered the room by a few inches.

"Rufus!" Serena exclaimed as she saw the wildness in his eyes.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I was having dinner with my brothers, Nate, and Blair. What the hell are you doing?"

"Taking your brother home," Rufus stated before he raised his voice and shouted, "Eric, get your things. You're coming home with me right now."

"No, he is not," Blair said. "Rufus, look around you. You just broke a vase for no reason. Your step-daughter is afraid of you and your step-son won't live in the same house as you. How long do you think you have before Lily moves out?"

"How dare you threaten me," Rufus growled as he advanced towards her.

Chuck quickly stepped in between them. "Take another step towards Blair, and I promise you'll be spending the night in jail."

The elevator chimed again and security stepped out.

"Mr. Bass?"

"Take him outside," Chuck said as he motioned towards Rufus.

The guards advanced towards Rufus. He struggled as they put their hands on his shoulders, but after a few failed attempts to break free, he followed them without further incident, but both Blair and Serena were shaking from fear as Chuck and Nate tried to calm them down.

Suddenly they heard the very distinct sound of a child's cry.

Blair sighed, "I better go take care of that."

"I'll come with you," Chuck responded as he heard a second cry mix in with the first. Both children had been woken up from the commotion.

Blair nodded as Chuck followed her into the nursery, closing the door behind them. Blair picked up Sabrina and Chuck lifted Sebastian into his arms. Both parents rocked the babies as they walked back and forth with them.

Chuck could see that Blair was still shaking herself from the fright of the evening.

Sebastian was calming down, but Sabrina was wailing as loud as when they first entered the room.

Chuck could see tears forming in Blair's eyes as her efforts to calm Sabrina down seemed to be useless.

As soon as Sebastian was relaxed and on his way back to sleep, Chuck put him back in his crib and gently took Sabrina from Blair who stared at them for a moment before sitting down in the rocking chair.

"Take a few deep breaths, Beautiful," Chuck encouraged her, "Rufus has left, and I assure you that he will not be allowed to walk through the lobby doors.

"He was ready to come at me," Blair said shakily.

Chuck sighed and went to the door. Opening it he called for his brother, "Eric, can you come here?"

The younger boy appeared with Elliot a moment later, "What's up Chuck?"

"I need you to get your niece calmed down," Chuck handed Sabrina over, "Because I need to calm down her mother."

Eric took Sabrina out of Chuck's arms and brought her into his own bedroom as Chuck went to kneel in front of Blair, taking her shaking hands into his.

"Blair, look at me," Chuck told her. Blair took a deep breath and met Chuck's eyes with her own. Chuck cursed his own stupidity for not telling security not to let Rufus up under any circumstances. Just because she seemed to be okay didn't mean that Blair wasn't still haunted about being shot.

"He came at me," Blair repeated. "He came at me just like that miscreant came at me in my cafe."

"Come on," Chuck got to his feet and gently pulled Blair to hers. "We're getting you into bed."

"He's still out there, Chuck," she sobbed, "He can still hurt other people, maybe even come after me again."

"Listen to me," Chuck told her seriously, making her look him in the eye. "He will never come near you again. Please believe me when I say that."

Blair wanted to believe him. She knew he would do anything to protect her and their children, but even with a full time security detail, she still wouldn't feel save.

Not until that evil man was in jail could would she be able to rest easy.

"Blair, what is-"

"Not now, Serena," Chuck told his step-sister as he walked Blair through the living room into their room. He shut the door behind them. Then he sat Blair on their bed and undressed her. He put her pajamas on and got her under the covers. "Blair?"

"I haven't gone catatonic on you, Chuck," Blair said as she looked up at him. "I just don't feel like talking right now."

"Please tell me that you know I won't let him hurt you," he asked.

"I know you'll try but you can't protect me every single second of every single day forever."

"Yes, I can. I can and I will," he told her vehemently.

"How? Are you planning on quitting and following me around all day? We'd kill each other within forty-eight hours and you know it," Blair had to smile at him.

"I lost almost a year with you," Chuck said, never breaking eye contact. "And when I found you again it was accompanied by the news that you'd been shot and that your mother was gone. I am never taking a chance like that again. I will find the piece of scum that took your mother from you and almost took you from us and when I do, I making sure he can never hurt anyone ever again."

"Remember my advice, please," Blair put a hand on his face. "Don't let revenge consume you. Bart let his grief consume him after your mother died and you paid the price for it. I don't want that to happen to us or our children."

"I don't know how to reconcile these two emotions. I love you and the children more than anything in this world, but I hate this man more than words can express. I want so much to rip his heart out, but by doing that I could lose you or at least time with you," Chuck admitted.

"Chuck, I want you to promise me that you will not hurt him or send someone to hurt him. I want justice, but not at the expense of you going to jail. When you find him, and I know you will, I want you to let the authorities handle it."

Chuck covered her hand with his and closed his eyes. He could clearly see the twins in his mind. He'd missed that first month of their lives and now that he had them and Blair back he couldn't imagine missing anymore.

With this thought in his head, Chuck nodded, opening his eyes, "I promise."

"Thank you," she breathed a sigh of relief as she caressed his face softly.

He leaned in to seal their pact with a kiss.

Blair smiled as they parted, "Now go get rid of Nate and Serena, make sure Eric's okay, put Sabrina in her bed and then come get in ours."

"I'm not so sure it's going to be easy to get rid of Serena. Now that the cat appears to be out of the bag, she looks to be a little upset with us about allowing Eric to stay here without telling her what was going on.

"Tell her to come back tomorrow morning and she, Eric, and I can have breakfast," Blair said. "Also, tell Elliot he can stay if he wants to. Eric shouldn't be by himself tonight."

"I'll try it your way," he sighed as he stood up, hovering over her as he kissed her forehead softly as his hands covered hers. He could tell that her nerves were still getting the better of her as he felt her hands quivering slightly under his.

"If they won't leave, give them blankets and tell them to enjoy the couch and the floor," Blair said, as she balled up her hands.

"I'd give them a hotel room before I let them sleep in our living room," Chuck rolled his eyes. "Or have you forgotten we live in a hotel, Beautiful?"

"No, I haven't forgotten but I know Serena. If she says she's not leaving until she gets an explanation, she doesn't mean she's not leaving the hotel. She means she's not leaving the room."

"I'm sure I'll be able to convince her," he told her smoothly, "I am Chuck Bass, after all."

"I'll believe it when I see it. Go," she pointed.

"Going," Chuck nodded and went back into the living room. "Serena, Nate, I hate to do this, but-actually I'm lying. I like doing this. I'm kicking you out."

"But-" Serena protested.

"Blair says to come back tomorrow and have breakfast with her and Eric. You can discuss this then."

"I'm not leaving," Serena told him as she crossed her arms to hold her ground.

"Look, S, Blair's having flashbacks to her attack and she's not in a good place to argue with you tonight. Perhaps in the morning, things will look better, but you've got to give her this," Chuck insisted.

"Is she okay," Nate asked in a concerned tone. Blair may not be his girlfriend but she was still his friend and he refused to lose touch with her again; not after everything else they'd all lost this year.

"She will be," Chuck nodded, "But she needs to find her place of zen right now, and it's not in a hair pulling shouting match with Serena," Chuck explained.

"We haven't pulled each other's hair since high school," Serena stated defensively.

"And I'm still wishing somebody filmed that," Chuck added sarcastically.

"Didn't she knock you into a fountain last summer," Nate asked.

Serena looked at the ceiling and sighed before she looked at Nate. Then she and hit him with her purse after each word, "Oh my God!"

"What is that for?" Nate exclaimed in surprise as he rubbed at his arm.

"Talking out of turn," Chuck said as he ushered them to the elevator. "I've got my limo waiting for you two downstairs. Serena, don't kill him until you get him home. Blood's a bitch to get out. See you tomorrow morning."

"But . . ." Serena protested from the elevator he gentle shoved her into. He was relieved when the door closed before she could get out anymore.

Chuck looked towards the ceiling and mouthed 'Thank you' before he headed to Eric's room. He knocked and poked his head in, "Hey, I'm here to collect Sabrina."

"She's sound asleep," Eric proclaimed as he watched Elliot gently pass her back to Chuck. Elliot had been quickly pulled into Sabrina's spell as he held her as she drifted off to sleep.

"She's quite the charmer," Elliot added.

"She gets that from her mother," Chuck grinned. "Speaking of, Eric, you and Blair and Serena are going to have breakfast tomorrow morning."

"Great," Eric stated sarcastically.

"Sorry, it was the only way we could get rid of her tonight."

"Blair okay," Eric asked.

"She will be. Thanks for taking care of Sabrina. Elliot, you're more than welcome to stay here tonight."

"You don't mind?" Eric inquired.

"Not in the least," Chuck responded.

"Thanks," Eric smiled.

"No problem. Just keep it down," Chuck smirked as he walked out with Sabrina, shutting the door behind him.

Chuck strolled back into their bedroom several minutes later after putting Sabrina down, making sure that both children were down for the evening, and putting in a call to housekeeping. Blair was lying in bed, half awake, as she waited for him to return.

"Sorry I took so long. Serena was more stubborn than usual," Chuck said as he undressed and got into bed with her. "How are you?"

"I think I'm a little calmer. But I feel bad about leaving dinner out on the table."

"I called housekeeping and gave them double overtime. Kitchen and dining room will be clean by tomorrow morning."

"You are absolutely amazing," she proclaimed as she kissed his cheek.

"On the lips is much more appropriate," he told her as he tapped his lips lightly.

Blair chuckled lightly as she gave in to his demand.

"Thank you," he smiled. "So, about tomorrow morning; do you want me here with you and Eric?"

"I think we'll be okay," Blair said. "Serena's going to be mad but I think she'll understand."

"Are you sure?" he pressed, "Because I can clear my morning to be here if you think you'll need me."

"So very sweet, but not necessary," she assured him as she traced his chin with her finger.

"Are you sure," he asked again. "I know Serena. She's not going to be happy we hid this from her. You and Eric shouldn't have to take the brunt of things by yourselves."

"Eric and I can handle Hurricane Serena but you might need to buy us dinner tomorrow night."

"Deal. We'll order from the Italian place you like so much. What is it called? Carmen's?"

"Carmine's," Blair corrected. "And thank you."

"As always, it is my pleasure."

"Well, it's not _always_ your pleasure," she said as she rolled on top of him and buried her face in his neck.

"Tease," he mumbled with a smile.


	22. Chapter 22

I was fine tuning this so it would be the best it could be.

I want to get to 220 replies so I need at least 11 people to reply to this chapter.

Speaking of replies, this chapter is for Krazy4Spike as she was my 200th reply. Thanks sweetie!

My beta is awesome.

One week 'til new GG. Yes!

And Kendall? I love Carmine's too.

Ch 22

Blair tucked her hair behind her ear as she adjusted one of the place settings again, as the perfectionist in her was not happy with the arrangement.

"Blair, stop it. The table looks perfect," Eric told her as he came into the dining room. "I'm beginning to wish Chuck had stayed. Maybe then you wouldn't be this nervous."

"I'm not nervous," Blair protested and then sighed at Eric's look. "Okay, fine. I'm nervous. Your sister, my best friend, is going to be here soon, and we have to tell her that you've been living here, we've been lying to her, and that her step-father is basically a ticking time bomb who is living alone with your mom who is in the line of fire."

"All the more reason for you to calm down," Eric advised. "Besides, this is a great spread. You should be able to enjoy it since you made it."

Blair smiled faintly at the praise and then looked at the food on the table.

"So, what's this in our bowls again," Eric asked as he took a seat and eyed the unusual looking concoction before him.

"It's called Cinnamon-Maple Quinoa," Blair told him. "It's an alternative to oatmeal."

"Looks good," Eric nodded, though his voice wasn't nearly as convincing as his words were meant to be. "And we've got muffins and cinnamon buns, right?"

"Right and for our hot entrée we have Bacon and Egg Cups. They're made with whole wheat tortillas," Blair checked her watch. "They'll be coming out of the oven the same time Serena walks out of the elevator, assuming she's on time."

"Blair, what time did you get up this morning," Eric asked.

"Four-thirty," Blair admitted with a sheepish grin.

"Sit," Eric ordered.

"I am not a dog, Eric," Blair frowned at him.

"Sit down anyway," Eric commanded. "You are unnecessarily overexerting yourself."

"I am not," Blair grumbled as she sat down.

"B, just listen to me for a second, okay?"

Blair nodded.

"You're my sister as much as Serena is, and I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Good. So, please know that since I love you I have no desire to see you end up back in the cardiac unit of the hospital. I realize that everything you're doing now and everything you did last night was because you wanted to see things go smoothly, but you need to let us help you," Eric told her.

"So, I should've woken you up and asked for your help?"

"Yes or you could've gone back to sleep and just ordered room service this morning," Eric reminded her.

"I did order something."

"What?" he inquired as he looked at the spread, not believing her.

"I asked Arthur to go the nearest twenty-four hour market and get me a watermelon."

"And that's for," Eric asked as he looked around for what could possibly contain the fruit she had mentioned.

"Watermelon punch," Blair smiled.

"I'm having Chuck tie you to the bed tonight."

"You can't do that," Blair frowned.

"Why not?"

"He'd enjoy it way too much," Blair snickered.

"Bad, bad images in my head," Eric groaned as he leaned forward and rested his forehead on the table while Blair giggled.

"What do you expect, Little E, this is Chuck we're talking about," Blair continued laughing. "You're just lucky I'm on medical restriction, or you'd most likely have a lot more than mental images to try to remove from your head."

"Which reminds me to find a new place to stay when those restrictions are lifted," Eric grumbled, "Do you think Chuck could spare a room downstairs?"

"For you, he'd probably spare a suite," Blair assured him. "But hopefully, you'll be going home long before that happens."

"I hope so," Eric frowned. "As grateful as I am to you and Chuck, I miss home. I miss my bed. I miss coming home to Mom's hugs. I miss Rufus' waffles."

"I know, E," Blair reached for his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"What am I missing," Serena inquired as her clicking heels broke through the somber tone she'd walked in on.

"Rough morning," Blair smiled sadly as she squeezed Eric's hand again before she rose up to hug Serena.

"Start explaining," Serena demanded as she hugged her brother.

"I don't feel safe at home anymore," Eric admitted as the trio took seats at the table.

"How long has this been going on," Serena asked gently.

"His mood swings started just after Jenny died. It was understandable. He'd just lost his daughter, and he was grieving so I ignored it at first. Then he began drinking, a lot more than was normal for him, at breakfast, when he was home for lunch, at dinner. I even found a few cheap liquor bottles in the garbage at his gallery. I was asleep one night when I heard a sudden crash. I found Rufus in the living room standing over the broken vase with his head in his hands. Upon seeing the wild look in his eyes, I returned to my room and locked the door as he advanced towards me."

"You should have told Mom," Serena chimed in, "Not run here."

"I did," Eric responded quickly. "I told her about the vase and his drinking, and when he put his fist through a wall instead of through me. I told her every time his behavior escalated. She waved it off as him grieving. She kept saying that he just needed a little more time, but I couldn't wait any longer. I knew that if I stayed it would only be a matter of time before that fist connected with me and not the wall, and I was not going to allow myself to become a human punching bag."

"Eric," Serena gasped as she got off her chair and ran to hug him.

"Please don't be mad at Blair and Chuck," Eric replied tearfully. "They were only trying to help."

"If it makes you feel better, I felt really guilty about not telling you," Blair said. "And I kept it from Chuck too."

"But . . ." Serena looked at her in confusion. It was obvious from the previous evening that he knew what was going on before Rufus entered the penthouse.

"I told him," Eric explained, "He took me out for a night on the town, Chuck Bass style, and it just came out."

"Chuck Bass style?" Serena asked for clarification.

"Strip club," Eric admitted, "But with a twist . . . a male strip club."

"Only Chuck Bass," Serena rolled her eyes.

"He said they make a good chicken marsala," Blair smiled.

Serena laughed, "Of course they do."

"Serena, I don't know what happens now but I have a feeling Chuck might go talk to Mom."

"Last night he was out of control," Blair added as her mind flashed back to the previous evening. Her hands began to quiver at the memories it stirred.

Eric automatically reached out and gave Blair's hand with a squeeze.

She smiled slightly as she squeezed back, giving him a silent thank you of support.

"We need to do something," Serena chimed in.

"Maybe you should let Lily know that you know," Blair suggested. "And maybe we should tell Dan."

"You haven't told Dan? It's his father," Serena looked surprised.

"How do we tell Dan that his father is one drink away from hitting his own wife?" Blair inquired.

"Quickly," Eric answered.

Serena and Blair nodded in agreement.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Chuck walked into the van der Humphrey apartment and looked around. There was no sign of Rufus but also no sign of Lily.

"Hello," he called.

"Charles, is that you?" Lily inquired as she ambled down the staircase.

"Are you alone," he asked as she came into view.

"Yes, Rufus is at the gallery," Lily nodded as she hugged him in greeting, "Is something the matter? Is it Blair?"

"Not directly but she's involved. We had a dinner party last night with Serena, Nate, Eric, and Elliot because Elliot wanted to meet more of Eric's family. About halfway through Rufus showed up and he was drunk."

"That's impossible," Lily frowned, "He was at the gallery until very late working on a new exhibit."

"Why would I make this up?" Chuck responded.

"I'm not saying you would but why would he go to your apartment?"

"To collect Eric," Chuck said. "He apparently has become tired of his childishness and wants him to move home. When we refused, first he tried to move past me to get to him, then he threw a vase and missed Serena by an inch, and finally he tried to go after Blair.

"Lily, I can't allow Rufus anywhere near my family, not like this. He woke my children. He frightened the love of my life. Blair was so upset that she was trembling. She was flashing back to the shooting.

"If he's ready to go after Blair, how long until you're next?"

"Oh my God," Lily managed as she sat down on the sofa. "Is Serena alright?"

"She's fine. He missed her. But Lily, if she'd entered a moment sooner," Chuck shook his head as he allowed himself to realize that Rufus could've killed or seriously injured his step-sister.

"I have to call Dan," Lily realized.

"Yes, and you need to get him some help. It's time for the rock n roll star to start living up to the rock n roll life and enter rehab."

"Did you have security hold him," Lily asked.

"No, I had him tossed out of the hotel," Chuck said. "But if you want I can have charges pressed against him so that he can be held somewhere."

"No," Lily responded quickly, "It's best for everyone to keep this out of the papers. If he's at the gallery, I can confront him there and get him help."

"I'm coming with you," Chuck told her.

"Charles," Lily shook her head. She was touched by his offer, but she didn't think it was necessary.

"If you think I'm letting you go alone you're crazy."

"We're all going," Serena chimed in as she, Eric, and Blair came into the room to hear the tail end of the conversation.

"And since I drew the short straw," Eric said, "I called Dan."

"No, Eric," Lily shook her head.

"He needed to know," Serena told her.

"And I'm the one that should have told him," Lily replied.

"You're a little late, Lily," Blair replied. "Dan's leaving the cafe in the capable hands of our employees and coming on the next train. Nate's picking him up. He'll be here within the hour."

"I should have done something when this first started," Lily groaned as she put her head in her hands. "It should never have gotten this bad."

"It'll get better, Mom," Serena put a hand on Lily's shoulder. "If Rufus refuses to get help, you're coming home with me to the Waldorf's."

"Refusal isn't an option," Lily responded, "Either he gets help or he's out of here. I've put you and Eric through enough over the years."

"But for now, we wait for Nate to call," Blair said as she went to Chuck's side. "The twins are with Dorota."

Chuck leaned over and kissed Blair's cheek softly and whispered into her ear, "Did breakfast go okay without me?"

"Yes," Blair nodded. "Serena actually liked the Quinoa."

"You're kidding," Chuck stared.

"It was good," Serena defended herself.

"You always had a different palate," Chuck shrugged his shoulders.

"You said you liked it when I made it for you," Blair tapped his shoulder lightly.

"I did," he responded defensively.

"I don't believe you anymore," Blair pouted.

"I swear," he whispered into her ear as he nibbled lightly.

"Hey impressionable youth in the room," Eric reminded them. "Knock it off."

"You should be taking notes," Chuck paused for a moment, "Both of you should. This is how you romance a significant other."

"By mauling her in front of your family?" Serena inquired.

Blair laughed at Serena's question and the slightly disgusted expression on Eric's face, "I think we better behave, Chuck. I wouldn't make out with your in front of Daddy or Mom. Lily deserves the same consideration."

"Thank you, Blair," Lily shook her head.

Blair heard Chuck's low growl of disappointment as he put a safe distance between them.

"I'll make it up to you, I promise," she told him as she stroked his chin lightly.

"I have no doubts about that," he smiled at her.

-x-x-x-x-x-

"How did you not think to tell me about this sooner," Dan asked of Nate.

"Hey, don't yell at me. I didn't know until last night," Nate defended himself as the cab came to a stop in front of the gallery. He paid the guy, and they got out. Chuck's limo pulled up behind them.

"I cannot believe it's as bad as everyone says it is," Dan shook his head. He believed what Nate told him about the previous evening, but surely he would have know if things were as bad as he was being led to believe. This was his father.

Blair got out in time to hear Dan's statement, "He was ready to come at me last night just to get to Eric, Humphrey. He threw a vase and just missed hitting Serena square in the face. We could be having this conversation in a hospital waiting room."

"I believe you," Dan assured her, "But I should have seen this. I should have been here to help him through this."

"You have your own life to worry about. Did Dorota meet you at the station?"

"Yes, and she took Jonathan back to your-to the Waldorf's," Nate said.

"Are you ready for this?" Serena inquired as she put her arm around her ex-boyfriend to comfort him.

"No," he admitted, "But it needs to be done."

"Remember, it's an intervention," Lily reminded everyone, "Under no circumstances do we allow him to leave, unless he's agreed to treatment."

"Dan," Eric motioned to him.

"I have them," Dan held up the keys. "If he tries to leave, we're locking the door."

"Stand behind me," Chuck said to Blair.

"I'll stand behind Dan. You stand in front of Lily," Blair said before she kissed him.

"No, you stand behind me," he repeated. Though he didn't think Dan would let his father harm anyone, but he couldn't be sure.

"Okay," Blair nodded before she slid her hand down his arm to take his hand with hers. "I'm here and I'm with you, okay?"

"I love you," he told her as he brought her hand to his lips.

"I love you, too."

Slowly everyone began descending towards the building.

Blair took Eric's arm and pulled him closer to her, "You stay with me, okay?"

"Aren't I supposed to protect you? I am the guy."

"I'm playing big sister," Blair told him.

"And you're a very good big sister," he smiled.

"Thank you," Blair smiled before she sobered up when they all entered the main room of the gallery. Rufus was at the counter.

"Rufus," Lily said to call his attention.

"Lily," he responded in surprise, the word slurred by the alcohol he had consumed.

"Rufus, it's not even eleven o'clock yet," Lily said. "And in case you haven't noticed, I'm not alone."

"What is everyone doing here?" Rufus inquired as he came around the counter and attempted to stand before them all, though he had to use the counter to keep his balance.

"We're here to get you help," Dan stated as he stepped towards him.

"Help with what?" Rufus inquired, "If it's here at the gallery, I'm going to decline. I'm not so sure I could use any help that any of you could offer." He began chuckling at the joke he thought he'd made.

"Dad, your drinking is out of control," Dan responded as he recoiled at the smell of his father's breath.

"So, I drink a little bit more than I used to. So what," Rufus waved it off.

"Have you been sober in the last month," Serena asked. "Or have you been drunk the entire time?"

"What difference does it make," Rufus shrugged.

"The difference is you put your fist through a wall instead of hitting my little brother," Serena hissed.

"It makes a difference to me," Lily said, almost in tears. "I've loved you since we were teenagers, Rufus. I hate seeing you do this to yourself."

"The difference is you almost broke your step-daughter's face with a vase," Nate added.

"The difference is you went after Blair last night," Chuck chimed in.

"The difference is I'm afraid of you," Eric added softly.

Blair put her arm around Eric and pulled him close.

"The difference is, I don't want my son having a drunk for a grandfather," Dan said. "You're better than that."

"The difference is, we all care about you, and want you to get help," Lily replied, "We know you're grieving Jenny's death, but the drinking and lashing out is not helping. It needs to stop."

"You have no idea what I'm going through," Rufus yelled as he advanced towards her. Both Nate and Dan stepped in to keep him away from his wife. "You have no idea what it's like to lose a child!"

Chuck reached forward and pulled Serena back behind him as Rufus got closer. His brotherly instincts kicked in immediately.

"You think Jenny would want this for you," Blair asked. "You may not want to hear it from me, but I'm telling you anyway. I've never lost a child, but I recently lost a parent and it happened in a way that could've been prevented had I done something differently. If I'd come here instead of her visiting me there, or if I'd come home sooner, or if I'd never left at all. I live with that guilt every day, Rufus and it would be so easy just to let my life go to hell around me, but my mom wouldn't want that for me and Jenny wouldn't want this for you."

"You are the last person who could tell me anything about what my daughter wanted. If it wasn't for you, she still would have been here in New York. She wouldn't have been anywhere near that explosion," he yelled, "If it wasn't for that asshole who couldn't keep it in his pants, I'd still have my daughter!"

"She made her own decisions that night," Serena defended Chuck.

"He forced her into his bed," Rufus scoffed.

"Jenny had every chance to walk away," Chuck assured them all. "She could have walked away at any time. I was almost begging her to."

Rufus made a move towards Chuck.

"Rufus, if you touch him, not only will I call the police, but our marriage will be over."

"How can you stand here and disgrace my daughter," Rufus growled as he got into Chuck's face, but not close enough to force Lily to make good on her threat.

"I'm telling you the truth," Chuck didn't even flinch. "Whether you want to believe it or not, Jenny's decision was her decision. I'm not proud of it. It cost me the most important thing in my life, and too many months with my own children, but it happened. I'm not going to apologize to you for it. The only person I need to apologize to, I have, and she's accepted my apology. Blaming me is going to change nothing. Jenny's gone. It was a horrible tragedy, but it's happened. As horrible as it is, we have to move on. You have to move on.

"The drinking isn't going to make the pain go away. It's still there when the alcohol evaporates."

"What do you know about what I'm feeling?" Rufus hissed.

"I've been there," Chuck told him, "I was in your place when my father died. The only difference is, you know Jenny loved you when she died. I don't know if my father loved me ever."

"Rufus," Lily pulled him around to face her, "Jenny loved you and she knew that you loved her. Yes you were angry at each other and things weren't perfect when she died but things are never perfect and we always have regrets when someone we love leaves us. But we can't let our lives fall apart."

"You need help, Dad," Dan added.

"I don't need help," Rufus shook his head, "I just need my family, what I have left."

"We can't help you," Lily replied, "Not right now. We'll support you, and be with you every step of the way, but we can't fix this for you. Only you can help yourself."

"Dad, I want you in my son's life but not like this."

"My mom's gone. Chuck's birth mother is gone. Lily's the only grandma they have and I won't let them visit her at your house until you get help," Blair said.

"They're amazing children, Rufus," Eric stated, "They'll love you."

"But I want them to know you. The you that raised Dan and Jenny. The you that makes waffles on Sundays. The you that Lily fell in love with when she was a teenager."

"And this isn't him," Lily told him as she rubbed his shoulder softly.

Rufus flinched at her touch. The motion brought tears to both their eyes. They'd fought so long and gone through so much to be together. His drinking was tearing them apart.

"I'll do it," Rufus conceded finally, "Whatever I need to do, I'll do it.

"I need my family."

"The Ostroff Center is willing to take you immediately," Lily said quietly. "I brought a bag for you."

Rufus nodded as he wrapped his arms around her. They both cried softly.

"I'm sorry, Lil," he whispered.

Blair reached out and touched Nate's shoulder. He looked at her.

"Call a cab," she mouthed.

Nate nodded as he stepped out of the room to make the call.

"Dan, we'll meet you back at my mom's house, okay," Blair said, knowing he'd want to stay with his dad as long as he could.

Dan nodded as Blair took Chuck's hand and motioned for Eric to follow them out. This was a time for Lily, Dan and Rufus. Everyone else needed to step back. They'd done their job.

"The cab will be here in about fifteen minutes," Nate told them once they joined him on the sidewalk. "What happens now?"

"Rufus gets help and hopefully he comes out on the other side of this okay," Blair said. "But right now, I want to go to my mom's and hold my children."

Chuck nodded as he opened the limo door for her. "That is the best idea you've had all day."

"You guys coming," Blair asked of Nate, Serena, and Eric.

"I'm gonna go catch up with Elliot," Eric said. "He wanted me to call him after everything was over."

"And Nate and I need to talk," Serena responded, wanting to give Blair and Chuck time to themselves.

"Call me later," Blair told Serena. "Eric, you want a ride?"

"I'm gonna walk," Eric said.

"Be careful," Chuck told him.

"Yes, Dad," Eric rolled his eyes.

Chuck shot a glare at his brother before he followed Blair into the limo, closing the door behind him.

Blair leaned back against the seat and looked at the passing scenery of the city as she played with the charm around her neck. As she dropped it and rested her hand over her heart she felt the lace of the camisole she'd put on that morning under her sweater. She thought of another time she'd worn something lacy in this limo and couldn't help but say, "Thanks for the lift."

"You were amazing up there," he couldn't resist the urge to add.

Blair giggled, "That's one memory I keep very close to my heart."

"Show me," he challenged her as he pulled her flush against him, his ear to her chest to hear the pulsing beating of her heart.

"You did really good in there," Blair said quietly as she traced a line down along Chuck's jaw.

"I'm sorry you had to hear all of that...again," he sighed.

"It's behind us," she assured him, "But it doesn't mean it's in the past for everyone else."

"I am very sorry," he responded.

"It's behind us," she repeated as she put her fingers to his lips. "I meant it when I said I'd never bring it up again."

"You're being too easy on me," he sighed.

"No, I'm not," Blair shook her head. "Lily and Rufus weren't the only ones in that room who fell in love when they were teenagers. I think I loved you before I even knew it. I know I loved you before I ever admitted it to myself or you. If you had died in that alleyway last summer, I don't know that I'd be that much better off than Rufus is right now."

"Yes, you would," he assured her, "You are the strongest woman I know. You can get through anything."

"We were so screwed up when we were shot," Blair sighed as she rested her head on top of his. "You thought I never wanted to see you again, and I was afraid to see you again."

"But it's behind us now, right?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"Good," Chuck smiled against her skin. "God, what I wouldn't give for a time machine right now."

"Why?"

"I'd go back and tell myself not to let you go home alone that night."

"I have a better idea, how about we go ahead in time to after my restrictions get lifted," she teased, "I think it's time we stopped looking at our past and look towards our future."

"Good point," Chuck nodded. "But I think we should take it easy the first time after you get the green light. I don't want to damage you."

Blair pulled back and smiled at him, "Chuck Bass is protective. Who knew?"

"Now, you do," he grinned.

-x-x-x-x-

"Dennis Quaid," Chuck stared. "Seriously?"

"I like this movie," Blair said as she made herself comfortable on the couch. "I must have watched it like ten times while I was pregnant."

"Really," he asked.

"Yes," Blair frowned at him. "Now are you going to stand there or come sit with me?"

Chuck took a seat on the couch next to her and was happy when she snuggled in next to him.

"I actually think you have a lot in common with Dennis' character," she said about ten minutes into the movie.

"Excuse me? I am not a motorcycle riding, Elvis loving, firefighter."

"No, but you are not in love with Donna Reed either."

"Okay, but I will take you and Chinese take-out over her any day," Chuck teased.

"If you start singing, I'm going to kill you."

"Elvis really isn't my thing."

"Nah, you're more the Johnny Cash type," Blair smiled at him. "Dark, brooding, handsome."

"Thanks," Chuck smirked.

They turned their attention back to the movie and Chuck looked at Blair surprised, when she paused it.

"Blair?"

"No guns," she shook her head.

"Excuse me?"

"No guns," she repeated. "I know that the Captain and William took you, Nate, and Tripp hunting a few times over the years but I never want a gun in our house."

"I never knew you were anti-gun," Chuck responded as he ran his fingers through her hair.

"I was shot in the chest at close range by some deranged lunatic that had no business possessing a gun in the first place. This request really shouldn't be too much of a leap," she reminded him.

Chuck moved his hand to where he knew her scar was and lightly traced it through her sweater, "No, I suppose not."

Blair caught his hand in hers, "You know I catch you staring at it sometimes, right? Just like you catch me staring at yours."

"It's a new piece of you to love," he told her.

"People have scars in all sorts of unexpected places," Blair said quietly as her eyes glanced towards his hip as her was able to visualize his recently acquired scar. She decided to shift their conversation towards their original topic. "Did you inherit any firearms from Bart?"

"Yes," he nodded, "And I'll have them removed first thing tomorrow morning."

"Donate them to a museum or hand them in to the local police station," Blair said. "I'm sure Bart's collection has some antique pieces in it."

"I don't remember," he sighed, "It's been years since I remember actually looking at them."

"I just don't want our children ever thinking that guns are something that they should have in their home. Even though I know my mom grew up with them in her house. I can remember an old hunting rifle hanging above the fireplace at my grandmother's house. It was my grandmother's Grandfather's."

"A relic from a war long ago?"

"Probably," Blair nodded.

"If you don't want guns in our home, then there will be no guns," Chuck promised. "To be honest they don't thrill me either. I kept them because they were my father's."

"You know, thinking back, you never looked all that thrilled when Nate would remind you of the annual hunting trip that he'd managed to get Howard and William to agree to let you go on," Blair recalled as she looked up at him.

"Enjoying the outdoors and physical activities not including anything horizontal isn't really my cup of tea."

"That is one thing we never tried," Blair smiled as she snuggled in closer.

"What's that," Chuck asked curiously.

"Noisy sex in a public place," she smirked.

"Sounds like a wonderful way to spend a day."

"Maybe later," Blair unpaused the movie and they went back to watching it.

Chuck reached over to grab the remote. While he knew she was enjoying the movie, he couldn't focus enough to appreciate it with her. "Perhaps we give Dennis Quaid another evening of our life."

"What do you have in mind?" Blair inquired as he turned off the movie while she turned towards him.

"How about we go cuddle up with our children for a while longer," he suggested. "And then perhaps later, cuddle up with each other."

"They're down for the evening," she reminded him. "And I still have those pesky restrictions."

"I said cuddle," he repeated, "There are ways to cuddle without it progressing to sex. We managed for this long already."

"But for how much longer," she thought out loud, not really intending on him answering her.

"For as long as it's necessary," he told her as he turned her gaze so she could see the seriousness in his eyes.

"Do you promise not to wake the children?" she demanded.

"Yes," he nodded.

"Then let's go," she replied as she stood up swiftly and pulled him along as they went in to be with their children.

Chuck went immediately to Sabrina's crib to pick her up as Blair dashed over to Sebastian. After such a long and exhausting day, it was so wonderful being able to come home to these two angels. It made the world's problems seem less so.


	23. Chapter 23

Thank you for all your kind words. I hope the grammar in this chapter satisfies everyone. My beta is awesome.

Chuck exited the elevator and stopped short when he saw Blair sitting on the chair against the wall of the foyer with the baby carriers on either side. She smiled when she saw him and stood up.

"You left a little fast this morning," Blair told him. "We didn't even get to have breakfast together."

"Sorry," he muttered his apology as he bent over to kiss each of his children's cheeks before his lips claimed hers.

She didn't let him pull away as she gave him a deep kiss as her arms wrapped around his neck to hold him close. "You think I forgot what today means to you?"

"Blair, I meant it when I said I didn't want you to make a big deal of this day. You know better than anyone what today means to me."

"No big deals," Blair assured him with a nod of her head. "I'm not throwing you a party, and I didn't invite anyone over. It's you, me, and our children tonight.

"Ahem," someone cleared their throat.

"Oh and Dorota, too, but she's only here keep an eye on them so we can be alone," she replied as she motioned towards the children.

"Good," he sighed in relief. He'd been dreading coming home for fear that he'd find a surprise party waiting for him.

"Happy Birthday, Mr. Chuck. Vanya and I get something for you. It in living room."

"Thank you, Dorota," Chuck smiled as the Polish woman took the carriers to the nursery.

Blair led him into the living room and sat them down on the couch, "Lily, Serena, Eric, and Nate sent over gifts, too. You don't have to open them tonight or even tomorrow. But they're here because you have people who love you in your life."

"I only care about three, and they are all here with me," he told her as he captured her lips again.

Blair smiled, "In that case, do you want to open the present the twins got you?"

"I said no presents," he chuckled lightly.

"You said no presents from me."

"You're very sneaky, Waldorf," Chuck said as he accepted the small box.

"The children picked it out, I swear," she smirked as he lifted the lid.

"Because two infants have the capability to verbalize their desires and also have the ability to pay for the gift," he chuckled.

"They are your children, are they not?" she smirked.

"They are," Chuck nodded.

"So, I took them to the store and Sabrina pointed and Sebastian nodded."

"So, this was all their idea?"

"Exactly," Blair nodded as she motioned towards the box eager to see his reaction. She hadn't been lying when she said Sabrina picked it out, so she was eager to see if he appreciated Sabrina's good taste. "Open it."

"It's beautiful," he smiled softly as he pulled the platinum pin out of the box, eyeing the two identical topaz gems. He lifted a curious eyebrow to Blair to get an understanding of their meaning.

"Their birthstones," she explained. "It's to put on your lapel so that you always have them close to your heart."

"I love it," Chuck smiled as he slid an arm around her waist and pulled her close. "It's perfect."

"I want to give you something else."

"Blair, you promised no gifts."

"I know, but I think this is something you really need," Blair replied, "Actually something you deserve."

"Well, I know it's nothing that involves us being naked," Chuck smirked.

"Funny," Blair frowned.

"I'm sorry," he responded as he reached out to take her hand, caressing it gently as he realized he'd upset her by not taking the gift as seriously as she wanted him too.

"You're forgiven," Blair said with a nod. She then handed him an envelope. "This is for you."

"Money?" he teased.

"Forget it," she replied as she snatched the envelope before he could open it. "It was a silly idea anyway."

"Give it," Chuck stole it back. "I want this, and I'm sorry I haven't been treating this with the right amount of seriousness."

"It's something that I've been giving serious thought for awhile, and I know it's something that you've really wanted," she hinted.

"Okay," Chuck opened it and got a little nervous when he saw the legal jargon.

"It's not a prenup, is it?" he gulped nervously.

"No, keep reading."

"Blair," he gasped as he realized what it truly was. "Are you sure?"

"You were right. They are Basses and they should have the name. Especially, and I cannot believe that I'm about to say this, but especially Sebastian."

"If you're not sure, you can change your mind," he offered, though the gesture made his heart swell with pride.

"I'm sure," she assured him, "You've been amazing through everything we've been through since…" She trailed off as she didn't want to think about the shooting. "You've been amazing. The children adore you as I know you do them. I never really thought you'd take to children as well as you have."

Chuck put the papers down and gathered her into his arms lifting her off the floor.

"Chuck, put me down," Blair giggled as he spun her around, making her dizzy in the process.

"You have no idea how much this means to me," he replied as he lowered her back to her feet though he kept his arms wrapped tightly around her.

"Yes, I do," Blair nodded her head. "I'm not oblivious, Chuck. I know how much it means to you for them to have your name."

"I've always hated this day because of the events that happened on the day I was born, but not this year. That itself is the greatest gift you could have given me today."

"I love you, Bass," she smiled. "You and our baby Basses."

"I love you, too," Chuck said. "Now, since there is nothing you could do that could possibly top your present, let's go to sleep."

"Dinner first," Blair said pulling him towards the dining room as she walked backwards. "I made eggplant parm and that coffee spice cake you like."

"Blair, it's kind of late," he reminded her.

"I know," she nodded, "Who knew you'd turn into a workaholic on your birthday of all days? But it's your birthday, and despite how much you dread the day, it's still one to celebrate, so dinner is waiting."

"Well, I do like that cake you make," Chuck smiled.

"I know," Blair told him. "Let's eat. We only have so much time alone before Dorota has to leave and Eric returns home from his evening with Elliot."

"I had lunch with Eric today."

"And," she prompted him.

"He's thinking Lily's all by herself now," Chuck said as he started to eat.

"He wants to move home, doesn't he?"

"Yes," Chuck nodded, "But he's worried about how you'll take it."

"I'll be great. I can have my room back."

"What?" he choked on his food.

Blair started to laugh uncontrollably.

"That's not funny," he scolded her.

"The look on your face certainly is," she continued giggling.

"Do you want to move back into the other room?"

"No," Blair shook her head as she got up and sat on his lap.

"You sure?" he pressed as his hands came to rest at her waist.

"I like being able to snuggle up next to you on those cold nights," she replied as she burrowed her head into his chest. "And I'm sorry for teasing you. I should be nicer to you today of all days."

"Yes, you should," he nodded as she kissed his lips lightly.

They were interrupted by the entrance of Dorota, "Miss Blair? Mister Sebastian has fever."

"I was afraid he was coming down with something," Blair sighed as she went to pick Sebastian up out of his carrier. "He was a little fussy earlier this evening."

"We should take him to the emergency room," Chuck responded reflexively.

"Chuck, take it down a notch," Blair said with a wry smile.

His head was spinning with all the worst case scenarios, having never experienced a true illness with his children since they'd come to live with him. "My child is ill. There is no taking it down a notch."

"Our child," Blair corrected. "Children get fevers all the time and more than half the time it turns out to be nothing. We'll take his temperature and see how high it is. Then I'll call that fancy pediatrician you hired and get her opinion."

Chuck dashed into the bathroom to retrieve the thermometer. His heart was hammering out of his chest with the dread he was feeling. He couldn't shake the uneasy feeling. He'd lost him mother on this day so many years earlier. He was certain he was going to lose his son.

"Chuck, take a deep breath," Blair instructed him as he returned on the verge of tears. "It's going to be okay."

"You don't know that," Chuck said.

"Dorota, can you take Sebastian's temperature?" Blair handed the thermometer over to Dorota along with her son. "I need to have a word with Chuck."

"Blair, not now."

"Oh, right now," Blair corrected pulling him into the kitchen. "You have got to calm down. Working yourself up over something that is probably nothing is not going to do anyone any good."

"This day is cursed," he told her. "I will not stand by and lose my son on the same day I lost my mother so many years earlier."

"Hey, look at me," Blair put her hands on his face. "This day is not cursed. This day is sacred. Your mom wanted you so much she didn't care if it cost her her own life. That is a gift."

"You'll never convince me that this day is anything other than what it is…a curse," Chuck told her as he wrapped his hands around her delicate wrists to pull her hands away from his face.

"No, you listen to me," Blair insisted. "This day is not a curse. This day is one of the most important days in our family history. You exist and because of that, they exist. Do you know how grateful I am for that?"

Chuck's tears finally spilled over. He couldn't contain his agony as he wrapped his arms around her and sobbed against her shoulder. It was more than just his concern for his son tumbling out. It was him mourning for his mother in a way he never had allowed himself before.

"It's okay," Blair soothed as she held onto him. "It will be okay. He will be okay."

Dorota came in with Sebastian in her arms. At Blair's urging, Chuck held him tight against his chest.

"His fever drop since before," Dorota announced as she handed the thermometer back to Blair.

Sebastian wrapped his tiny hand around Chuck's finger as he looked into his father's eyes.

"Thanks, Dorota. Was Sabrina still asleep?" Blair asked.

"Yes, Miss Blair. She out like little princess," Dorota nodded.

"Okay. Can you change Sebastian's sheets? I still want to call the doctor and see if there's anything else we should be doing," Blair said.

Dorota nodded as she disappeared.

"He's going to be just fine," Blair assured Chuck as she saw Sebastian's eyes start to close as he gave a tiny yawn.

"Sebastian Nathaniel Bass," Chuck whispered quietly. He couldn't get over how well those words sounded together.

"Serena calls him Bastian sometimes," Blair smiled as she caressed his head softly.

"He's so beautiful," Chuck marveled as his eyes scanned the features of his son's face. There were his distinct features, but also soft touches of Blair. The combination resulted in this most beautiful little boy.

"So is his father," Blair said as she caressed the side of Chuck's face. "And after we put him back down, I think maybe we should take a look at that album Anne gave me."

"I don't foresee letting him out of my sight this evening," Chuck told her.

"We should still take a look at the album," Blair smiled.

"Why?"

"Because I know you won't look at it alone," Blair said.

He nodded as he allowed himself to be led into the living room.

"I'm just going to call the doctor and grab the book. Have a seat. I'll be right back," Blair instructed him.

Chuck nodded as Blair went to accomplish her tasks.

"Okay little man, you can't go scaring your old man like this on his birthday. It's not nice. And you're going to have to get used to your father freaking out like this."

Sebastian gave a little hiccup as he continued to sleep soundly in his father's arms, his hand still tightly clinching Chuck's finger.

"Today is not a good day for me, even though it's my birthday. It's actually kind of a sad day for me. I lost your grandma on this day a long time ago.

"But I can assure you that your birthday will always be a day of celebration, as it's easily the best day of my life even though I wasn't there to greet you and your sister as you came into this world."

"The pediatrician thinks the fever is nothing to worry about," Blair announced as she returned with the photo album in her hands.

"Easy for her to say," he grumbled as he made a mental note to look into finding a new pediatrician.

"She's the best in New York," Blair reminded him as she sat down next to him. "You had half of the R&D department at Bass look into her credentials. They don't come any better. You know that."

"There's always better," he replied, "We deserve one that understands the neurotic nature of Chuck Bass."

"Are you ready?" Blair decided to ignore his comments as she sat herself down next to him and opened the book to the first page, which was a picture of his mother.

"No," he shook his head as he took a deep breath. He couldn't remember when was the last time he'd really looked at a picture of his mother.

Blair put her hand on his arm as they looked at the pictures in the book, "I've seen this one before," she pointed. "That's Nate's grandmother and her mother with Anne and your mom."

"She was beautiful, wasn't she," he choked out as his fingers traced along an image of her. He wasn't really even hearing Blair at the moment.

"Yes, she was," Blair nodded as she looked at him and then back at the picture. "You really do have her eyes, you know."

"I know," he nodded. "I always figured that was why my father couldn't tolerate looking at me."

Blair choked up at his revelation and decided to flip the page to another picture.

"Wow," Blair breathed, "Is that your dad's father?"

"I think so," he nodded as he looked at the image more closely.

"Chuck, except for the eyes, you look exactly like him."

"Another painful reminder for my father," Chuck sighed, "He was very close with his old man. He died shortly after my mother did."

"I don't get Bart," Blair shook her head. "Lily always tells me how glad she is that Eric has her dad's smile. It makes it seem like he's not so far away. I feel the same way when I see Sabrina smile a certain way. It reminds me of my mom. You'd think he'd have been happy to have the reminders of people who aren't around anymore."

"That wasn't the way Bart worked," Chuck shook his head. "I've given up trying to figure him out."

"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea," Blair replied as she tried to close the book. It was only putting him in a more somber mood.

"No," Chuck stopped her. "Sebastian and Sabrina will ask one day about their family, and I'll need to get through showing them this without choking up. To do that, I'll need to get used to seeing these people."

Blair put her chin on Chuck's shoulder, "You're braver than you give yourself credit for."

"Am I really?" Chuck turned his head towards her and smiled as she kissed his cheek. "I suppose it's easy to be brave with you at my side."

"Don't go giving me the credit," Blair shook her head. "You're brave on your own too."

"Not always," Chuck shook his head. "There are times I can be the biggest coward in the world,"

"I'm well aware," she smirked, "But in the moments that matter most, you're the bravest man in the world."

Chuck's eyes glanced down to his son. His eyes racked across the lettering on his son's shirt that read, "I love my daddy." He vaguely remembered that Sabrina was wearing the same shirt. "Where did you get these?"

"I went to the store and bought them," Blair said with a smile. "They make all kinds of specialty shirts like this. We can even get them customized with whatever else we want the shirt to say."

"Do they make 'I love Mommy' shirts?" he inquired.

"Of course," she nodded. "I bought those too."

"Of course you did," Chuck nodded. "Anything else?"

"I love Dorota," Blair smiled.

"We all should get those shirts," Chuck laughed.

"And use them for our Christmas cards," Blair agreed.

"Miss Blair, is Mr. Sebastian ready to go back to bed?" Dorota asked.

"Right on cue," Blair smiled as she lifted Sebastian from Chuck's arms, though Chuck was reluctant to release him. "Yes, he is."

"Watch him for awhile, okay, Dorota?" Chuck asked.

"Yes, Mr. Chuck. Do not worry. He is good, strong baby."

"Like his father," Blair added as she hugged Chuck, hoping to distract him so Chuck wouldn't follow Dorota into the children's bedroom.

"I think we should," Chuck started as he motioned like he was going to follow Dorota.

"Go to sleep," Blair finished. "What a wonderful idea."

"Are you sure it's okay to leave Sebastian in his room this evening?" Chuck asked nervously. "We could move his crib into our room for the night."

"He's fine. We have a monitor in our room," Blair pulled him off the couch and towards their room, "Dorota in his room, and it's a less than ten second trip between their bedroom and ours. If he gets sicker, we'll know about it immediately."

Chuck wasn't convinced, but Blair's grip on his hand was tight and unbreakable, so he had to follow her.

"If you're good, I am going to make you very happy," Blair promised.

"How is that?" he chuckled, "You're still on restrictions."

"But you're not. I can make you happy without making me happy."

"Doesn't seem fair," Chuck's smile widened.

"It's your birthday."

"Have I mentioned today, how much I love you?" he smiled.

"I believe it was when you woke up this morning, and I put Sabrina on your chest."

"Well, I'm saying it again. I love you in a way that consumes me," he replied as he wrapped his arms around her tightly.

"And I love you," Blair smiled. "Happy Birthday, Chuck."


	24. Chapter 24

Yay. GG is back on. Okay before I thank the usual suspects I have to address something that a few of you have brought up. I do not plan on putting Jack in this story. I have no desire to write a pedophiliac would-be rapist who harbors an unnatural obsession for his nephew's soulmate. As far as I'm concerned, Jack is somewhere in the Australian Outback being roasted on a spit for sleeping with a tribal chief's virgin daughter the night before her wedding.

Thank you for your replies and thank you to my amazing beta.

-x-x-x-x-

"What is wrong with Coney Island?" Blair asked.

"It's in Brooklyn," Chuck made a face of disgust. "We spent the first twenty years of our lives avoiding Brooklyn, and now you want to bring them there?"

"Chuck, I've recently discovered that things in Brooklyn aren't so bad."

"I know you and Humphrey have some weird friendship type thing going on but I am not going to willfully subject our children to that."

"Well, I don't think a boat ride in the harbor is appropriate when they're this young."

"There has to be something we can agree on," Chuck frowned.

The phone rang and Blair got up to answer.

"Keep thinking. I'll want a suggestion when I get back."

"Yes, dear."

Chuck vaguely heard Blair say hello to whoever was on the phone and then he heard the clatter of the phone hitting the floor. He looked up and saw Blair leaning against the end table with both of her hands on it.

He got up and went into the living room. Picking up the phone he anchored Blair to him by the waist.

"Hello? Who is this?" As the person on the other end explained the situation Chuck held Blair tighter. "Yes, I understand. Thank you."

Blair looked up when Chuck hung the phone up shaking her head slightly, "I can't."

"This is good news, Blair. They think they've finally caught the guy that hurt you and killed your mother. You just have to take a look," Chuck told her gently. "You don't even have to be in the same room as him, and I'll be right beside you."

"Do you know why he shot my mom?" Blair asked. "Because she wouldn't give up her wedding ring. Her ring is gone. She should have been buried with it, but that miscreant took it and did god only knows what with it."

"Blair, he could do this to someone else," Chuck told her not letting go of her. "He took your mom from you and nearly took you from all of us. Do you know how lost I'd be without you right now? You said it yourself, the last words we had between us when you were shot was a fight."

"I just can't," she told him tearfully.

"I know you're scared but you have to. For your mother…for our children."

Blair put a hand to the side of Chuck's face as she looked at him hopefully, "You'll come with me."

"I'll be there," he nodded.

Blair wrapped her arms around him and held on, "I love you."

"You are the bravest woman in New York," he told her as he held her close, "I know this is your worst nightmare come to life, but by doing this, it's the first step towards putting this behind us."

Blair just nodded against his shoulder. She didn't think she could speak right now.

"I'll call Dorota," Chuck said.

"No," Blair whispered. "Call Lily. I want them with their grandmother today."

"Good idea, Beautiful," he smiled as he kissed her cheek softly.

"I'll go get the children ready," Blair responded.

"You stay here," Chuck said. "I'll get them ready. You just have a seat and work on calming yourself down, okay?"

Blair nodded with a weak smile. He was so irresistible while taking care of her. "Make sure to ask Lily if she wants the twins there, or if she's going to come here."

Chuck nodded as he made the call to Lily. After a short conversation, it was determined that Blair and Chuck were going to take the twins to Lily's on their way to New Jersey.

Blair was sitting on the couch with her arms resting on her knees when Chuck returned, "They're packed up. Lily's going to have Serena watch them with her. She sends her love and wants us to have dinner tonight when we get home."

"I don't know what kind of company I'll make tonight," Blair looked up.

"It's a standing offer," Chuck assured her as he kissed the top of her head.

Blair nodded, "I'm scared."

"I know," Chuck nodded as he caressed her shoulders softly, "But know that I will protect you."

"That's never a concern," she smiled. "I know you will."

"Do you remember the first night you found out I was having nightmares?" Chuck asked.

"Yes," Blair nodded.

"You lay with me and made me talk about it before you decided you were going to stay in the same room with me so that I'd be okay and I'd know you were okay. Before I fell asleep you told me it was okay to turn out the lights because you'd still be there. It goes both ways, Blair. I'll always stay with you."

"The worst thing I've ever done, the darkest thought I've ever had," Blair nodded.

"I will stand by you through anything because I love you," Chuck finished. "And if I've never apologized for my original response, I'm doing so now. I should have pulled you into the car with me."

"The proper response would have been for you to tell me that you love me too and then pulled me into the car," Blair corrected him, "But you were distraught with grief, so I'll let that slide."

"Thank you," Chuck said with a smile. "Blair, everything that happened back then-"

"Not today, okay? I can only handle one life changing event per day right now."

"All right," he agreed, but he made a mental note to come back to that topic another day. He needed to properly thank her for being at his side. He knew he hadn't made it easy on her, but she was at his side, holding him up, being his support when he thought he'd had nothing left to live for. It was because of her that he didn't drink himself into oblivion, yet he never told her so.

"We should get going," Blair said in as steady a voice as she could manage as she took Chuck's hand.

Chuck kissed her hand and then guided her towards the children that were waiting patiently in their carriers near the elevators.

-x-x-x-x-

"You're being way too quiet for my liking," Chuck said to Blair as they drove toward New Jersey. They'd dropped the children with Lily, who had hugged the stuffing out of both of them before she let them leave.

"I just want to get this day over with," Blair admitted. "I don't want to have to think of him ever again."

Chuck put his hands on her shoulders and brought her back against him. She relaxed against his chest, feeling his heart beat in time with hers and brought her legs up so that her feet rested on the seat.

"Do you want to talk?" he asked quietly.

"No," she shook her head.

"I'll be here when you do," he reminded her.

"I know," she nodded covering the hand on her shoulder with her own. "Just being here is enough right now."

After a few moments of silence, Blair broke through. "I wonder what his name is. How old he is . . . why he did it."

"Don't," Chuck said. "Don't make human. It just makes it harder."

"But I want to know what made his life so horrible that he had to burst into my cafe with a gun and then pull the trigger when my mother resisted."

"Blair, listen to me," Chuck said. "Wondering about this guy gives him a power he doesn't deserve and it's the power to make you feel some kind of empathy for him. Don't let him do that."

"I guess I'm just looking for closure," she sighed.

"You'll get it when he's punished."

"Or when I get taken off restrictions," she smirked as the familiar surroundings transported her back to 'that night'.

"Did I thank you for my birthday present the other night?" Chuck smiled.

"I believe thank you was shouted out in ecstasy a few times," she giggled, "Along with my name and a few dozen curse words and praises to God."

"I'll have to return the favor soon," he whispered.

"I will see to it that you do."

When the limo pulled up outside the police station, Blair's jovial mood shifted immediately. Her hands began shaking again as she reached for the door.

"Let Arthur do that, Beautiful," Chuck told her as he captured her hand and kissed it.

"I can do this," Blair stated as she took a deep breath as the door was opened from the outside by Chuck's faithful driver. "I can be strong and face my attacker and identify him and then put him out of my life."

"I'm with you every step of the way," Chuck said as they got out. He took her hand in his. "I'm not going anywhere."

Blair nodded, "I know."

At the entry to the precinct, she took another deep breath as Chuck opened it and escorted her inside.

"Excuse me," Blair said the to officer at the front desk. "I'm looking for Detective Vance."

"Ms. Thayer?" the officer inquired. When Blair nodded he continued, "Have a seat. I'll let her know you're here."

"Thank you," Blair stated as she turned towards the seats. Upon seeing the dingy quality, she decided to remain standing.

"Sit on my lap," Chuck offered with a smile.

"I'm not in the mood for what pops up," Blair stated with a slightly playful grin.

Chuck smirked at the humorous response as he caressed her shoulder softly, trying to give her an extra boast of courage she needed to get through the next few minutes.

"I'm so nervous," Blair confessed with a shaky breath.

"I've got an idea. After we're done here, instead of going right home, how about we go have lunch or something and then take a walk. We could find a pond and feed ducks."

"I like that idea," she smiled, "Not so much about lunch as I don't think my stomach will have settled enough to keep anything down, but feeding the ducks could be fun. We should drive back to New York, get the children at Lily's and take them with us."

"Your wish is my command," Chuck smiled.

"How many wishes do I have left?" she inquired curiously.

"No limit," he told her, "My goal in life is to make every one of your wishes from this moment forward come true."

"My own personal genie," she laughed. "I could get used to that."

"If you want, I'll get the outfit," he teased.

"I think I should get the Barbara Eden outfit," Blair smiled.

"I definitely could go for that," he moaned as the sight of her in the Jeanie costume popped into his mind.

"Behave yourself, Chuck," Blair warned. "People overhearing this conversation might not realize that we live together."

"Ms. Thayer, Detective Vance," the woman stated as she approached them. "We spoke at the hospital a few months ago."

"I remember," Blair nodded as she and Chuck took turns shaking the woman's hand.

"Now, I'll be taking you into a viewing room. Your friend will have to wait outside the door. I'm sorry, but that's procedure."

"But-" Chuck started. He stopped when Blair squeezed his hand.

"That's fine," Blair nodded. She shot a look at Chuck that told him that she'd be okay.

"I'll be right outside the room if you need me," Chuck assured her as he kissed her forehead softly.

"I know," she responded as she caressed his cheek softly.

"This way," Detective Vance showed them the way.

Just before Blair entered the observation room, she took yet another deep breath and kissed Chuck's cheek before she stepped in, clutching a picture of her children in her hand that she'd brought for courage.

Chuck leaned against the wall and waited. It took about ten minutes before she came back out and walked right into his arms.

She had tears streaking down her cheeks, and she was shaking.

"She did wonderfully," Detective Vance smiled as she reassured Chuck.

"Was it him?" he whispered into her ear.

"Yes," she nodded.

"Okay," Chuck said. "Okay. Let's go home."

"I have a few papers for you to sign, Ms. Thayer," Detective Vance spoke up, "And you will most likely be called to testify at his trial."

Blair nodded numbly as she and Chuck followed the woman to a desk. Blair sat down and Chuck stood behind her, his hands on her shoulder.

Blair scribbled her name where indicated. She inadvertently wrote 'Blair Waldorf' instead of 'Blair Thayer'.

"I'm sorry," Blair blushed.

"It's alright. I can go get another copy. Was Waldorf your maiden name?"

"Yes," she nodded, "But Thayer isn't my married name . . . it's complicated."

"But Thayer is legally your name?"

"Yes," Blair nodded.

"For awhile," Chuck added silently in his head.

Detective Vance left for a moment to get another copy of the paperwork.

"I can't believe I did that," Blair sighed as she looked at her signature.

"You were Blair Waldorf for almost twenty years. It's understandable. Do you remember when we were in third grade and that kid that Nate used to called Toilet Brush Head started calling you Blair Waldork?"

"Yes," she nodded, "I ran home to my father crying. I wanted to change my name right that moment."

"What stopped you?" Chuck prompted her.

"My father said it was such an honor to be Blair Waldorf and that the name held a prestige that nobody could touch."

"He was right," Chuck kissed the top of her head. "I hope one day Sabrina is as proud to carry the name Bass as you were to carry the name Waldorf."

"She is going to be such a daddy's girl," Blair smiled. "I can tell already."

"I certainly hope so," he smiled.

"What would you say if I decided to change my name back to Waldorf?" she inquired.

"It's your decision one way or another," Chuck told her. "I'll love you no matter what last name you choose."

"And if I chose van der Woodsen or Humphrey?" Blair smiled.

"I'd point out that you would just be changing your name to something else in the hopefully not to distant future."

"And what would that be," Blair asked.

"Bass," he told her.

"That would require a certain ring on my finger," she smiled as she looked to her left hand.

"When we're ready, it will be there," he said.

Blair kiss his lips lightly when the detective walked in, clearing her throat to announce her presence.

"Sorry to interrupt," the detective said. "Here you go."

Blair took special care to write her legal name. "Are we free to leave?"

"Absolutely," Detective Vance smiled.

"Thank you," Blair said as she stood up and took Chuck's hand. "Take me home."

"Gladly," he smiled.

"And Ms. Thayer, you did wonderful," Detective Vance assured her, "Your boyfriend should be very proud of you."

"I am," Chuck assured her, "I always am."

Blair could feel herself blush as they left the squad room.

-x-x-x-x-x-

"You see those Sabrina," Blair whispered to her daughter. "Those are ducks. When I was little, your grandpa says I called them 'quack-quacks'."

Sabrina's eyes were dancing as she watched the mallards waddle around them.

Sebastian didn't seem nearly as interested as his sister as his eyes scanned the skies around them.

"Your brother seems to have taken after your dad in this respect," Blair said. "He doesn't understand why I spend so much time out here feeding the ducks. He just does not understand their soothing quality."

"That's not true," Chuck chimed in, "Watching you is very soothing. I just don't need the ducks."

"Yeah, well you better start praying that your way of soothing yourself when we were teenagers does not manifest itself in Sebastian. Because while Bart never made good on any of his threats, I will send Sebastian to military school."

"If I don't beat you to it," Chuck added, "Sebastian, you and your sister will be perfect angels. If you step out of line as I did, you will be in military school so fast your head will be spinning."

"And what about Sabrina?"

"I'll send her to nuns," Chuck said.

"Hear that Sabrina," Blair laughed, "Daddy sounds serious, so you'll do well to behave. I wonder why Bart never sent you to nuns."

"It's the eleventh commandment. No Bass shall ever cross the threshold of any Catholic church. Lightening will strike it and set the place aflame."

Blair laughed out. Sabrina and Sebastian followed her lead.

"Are you feeling better, Beautiful?" Chuck inquired as he studied her relaxed posture. He'd massaged her shoulders nearly the entire ride from New Jersey, yet the tension didn't seem to dissipate until she held Sabrina in her arms.

"Yes, I am," Blair nodded. "It's just the reminder that I almost wasn't here for this is the most upsetting, to say the least."

"I know," Chuck nodded, "But we are here and know not to take this for granted. We are both very blessed."

Blair put Sabrina down on the blanket so that the little girl faced the lake while her brother was on his back looking at the sky. Then Blair climbed into Chuck's lap. "I really, really love you. You know that, right? Sometimes it feels like I don't say it enough."

"I know how you feel," he assured her as he kissed her cheek softly as his arms ensnared her waist. "Though I will not begrudge if you want to say it more often."

Blair laughed lightly, "I will do my best."

"I love you," Chuck whispered into her ear. He felt her shiver as his warm breath coursed through her body as he began nibbling softly. "Are you cold?"

"No," she shook her head as she felt her eyes roll back inside her head.

"Am I giving you a funny feeling," Chuck teased.

"Don't go too far," Blair warned.

"I won't," he assured her as he began caressing her shoulders as his lips began to flow across her neck, up to her cheeks. She turned her head and he took immediately advantage and kissed her deeply.

"See, I told you they'd be making out, Nate," Serena's voice reached them before their friends did.

Chuck and Blair were completely oblivious as they continued to make out.

"How long do you think it would take them to notice if we took their kids?" Nate inquired.

"Touch them and die, Archibald," Chuck growled as his lips continued to move against Blair's

"Well, that worked," Serena said as she plopped herself down and picked up her godson. "Hey buddy."

Blair groaned in disappointment as Chuck pulled away reluctantly.

Nate sat down next to Sabrina and lifted her into his arms.

"We could babysit tonight," Serena offered, "If the two of you want to pick up where you left off."

"Can't," Blair sighed in disappointment.

"Still on restrictions?" Nate inquired.

"I have a doctor's appointment first thing next week," Blair nodded, "I'm going to broach the subject."

"Don't rush yourself," Chuck warned her. "We're not in a hurry."

"Maybe you're not," Blair smiled.

"Oh ew," Serena made a face.

"Get over it," Blair scolded her best friend. "And if I can get passed the two of you going at it in my bed, you can certainly get over me and Chuck going at it in our own bed."

"Didn't you and Chuck go at it in Nate's bed last year once?" Serena scrunched her face in confusion.

"WHAT?" Nate exclaimed.

"Serena!"

"More than once," Chuck mumbled.

"Oh God, I-I need to shower and burn all of my clothes," Nate put Sabrina down and hopped up. He ran out of the park.

"That was a secret between you, me and Chuck," Blair looked at her friend sternly as she picked up her daughter.

"I'm sorry, I thought he already knew," Serena replied.

"Yes, because I'm in a real hurry to tell my ex-boyfriend I had sex in his bed," Blair rolled her eyes. "I, unlike Nate, tend to want to keep my sex life to myself."

"Sorry," Serena mumbled yet again.

"I wonder if this means he won't be replacing my bed in my apartment?" Blair thought out loud.

"He already ordered it," Serena said. "You might have to buy him some new clothes though."

"Got you covered, Beautiful," Chuck whispered into Blair's ear.

"You better call Dorota and make sure that Nate doesn't start the burning of his clothes inside the apartment."

"He's overreacting," Serena rolled her eyes, "He'll probably be back in a few minutes after he calms down."

_Who let the dogs out…_

"What is that?" Serena inquired as the Baha Men song interrupted the quiet afternoon with the ducks.

"Dorota," Blair explained as she pulled her cell phone out out of her bag. "Hello?"

"Miss Blair, Mr. Nate is throwing all clothes out of his room."

"Put them in a garbage bag and donate them to charity," Blair rolled her eyes. "Whatever you do, don't let him burn them."

"Yes, Miss Blair," Dorota said. "Miss Blair, he muttering something about you and Mr. Chuck violating his space. Should I worry?"

"No," Blair laughed, "It's a long story. Not worth mentioning."

"Alright Miss Blair. How babies?"

"They're wonderful, Dorota. I'll bring them by soon, okay?"

"Yes, Miss Blair, can't wait," Dorota responded eagerly.

"Kiss Anna for me," Blair instructed.

Serena was still snickering about Blair's choice of ringtones for her trusty maid. "Why did you choose that song?"

"Dorota chose it for me," Blair replied. "She thinks she's my watchdog, so she thought it fit."

"She did like to bark at me when we were younger," Chuck said fondly.

"All the times she tried to teach us Polish," Serena reminisced.

"All the times she yelled at me in Polish," Chuck shook his head.

"You deserved it," Blair told him.

"I certainly did," he agreed as he brushed a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Like the time you and Nate put vodka in the punch at the MADD fundraiser Eleanor had," Serena smirked.

"That was Archibald's idea. I merely provided the liquor," Chuck laughed.

"But it was your idea to take the donation box from the school fundraiser for the new library and give it to the streetwalkers in Times Square," Blair reminded him.

"They needed the money as much as the library did, and I learned far more from them than I did at the library," Chuck told her smoothly.

"And why is it that you let him touch you?" Serena asked.

"Because he's so good at it," Blair laughed. "They obviously did their job well."

"That's so gross," Serena exclaimed.

"Serena, we have two children. Chuck touches me. Get over it," Blair rolled her eyes.

"I'll touch you tonight, if you'd like," he spoke hotly against her neck.

Another shiver coursed through Blair's body at the thought.

"Besides, I don't make faces and comments when Nate makes innuendos about you two, do I?"

"No, but you did with Dan."

"Because that was Dan," Blair replied. "Nate actually makes sense to me."

"But you two are friends now," Serena said. "Would you still make the faces and comments?"

"No, but I'd still wonder why."

"I'd still make the faces and comments," Chuck chimed in.

Blair elbowed his stomach lightly in scolding.

"Ow," Chuck said. "What was that for?"

"Humphrey's a friend and a fellow parent. Technically, he's also your step-brother. I do not want Sebastian and Sabrina thinking it's okay to be mean to family members."

"Point taken," Chuck conceded. "I'll behave."

"Good," Blair nodded. "I'll reward you later, I promise."

"But I can still be mean to Jack, right?"

"If you ever see him again, I expect him to be shot on sight, so yeah you can be mean to him."

"He's the exception to every rule."

"Have there been any pervy uncle sightings?" Serena asked.

"No," Chuck pressed a kiss to Blair's shoulder. "And if he knows what's good for him, there won't be."

"Last I heard, he was staying put in Australia," Blair chimed in, "But the longer he stays away the better off we all are."

"Hey, why don't we do a girls' night soon?" Serena smiled. "Maybe go get ice cream at Serendipity and see a movie?"

"Not tonight," Blair shook her head, "But maybe another night soon. Tonight I need Chuck to take care of me. This day has wore at my nerves. I couldn't sit still through a movie."

"When you can, you know where I am," Serena smiled as she bounced Sebastian a little bit. "Nate and I can still babysit tonight, if you want to be alone. You may still be on restrictions, but if I know the two of you, you're finding a way around that."

"What do you think, Beautiful?" Chuck prompted her.

"No, but thank you, Serena," Blair shook her head and then looked at Chuck. "I'd love to be alone with you, but I want them under the same roof."

"Okay," he nodded.

Sebastian picked that moment to sneeze.

"We should get them home," Blair reacted.

"I should get going too," Serena said giving her godson to his mother and standing up. "I'm gonna go home and help Dorota bag up Nate's clothes."

"Tell Nathaniel to send me the bill," Chuck responded as Blair transferred Sabrina to his arms as she accepted Sebastian.

"Will do," Serena said as she walked away from the family.

Blair cuddled up with Sebastian, "Ready to go home?"

"With you, always," Chuck responded as he guided her in the direction of where the limo was sure to be waiting for them.

x-x-x-x-x

"I know what you're doing."

Chuck looked up to see Blair in the doorway of his office.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Chuck responded innocently.

"You're lying," Blair told him.

"I can't help myself," Chuck told her as he gave up trying to cover up his current project.

She knew him too well.

"I like to think we've come a long way since our days of plotting the downfalls of whatever enemy we thought we had when we were younger. Chuck, revenge doesn't solve anything."

"New Jersey has the death penalty," Chuck reminded her, "I'm simply looking to ensure that justice prevails."

"How very biblical of you, Chuck," Blair said.

"What do you expect from me, Blair?" Chuck sighed, "This is who I am."

Blair got in between Chuck and his desk and sat herself on top of it. She planted her feet on either side of his legs with the heel of her shoes hanging off the edge, "Revenge is pointless. It doesn't fix anything, and it won't bring my mom back."

"Blair, he almost succeeded in taking you away from me. He deserves to pay for that."

"And he will," Blair brushed her fingers down the side of his face. "But let the courts decide his punishment. Please don't let the need to get even override your common sense. We need you to be here with us."

Chuck closed his eyes as he allowed her words to penetrate his thick skull. "I almost lost you," he repeated as he opened his eyes. The rage was gone. All that remained was the pain he felt by the mere potential of losing her.

"You didn't," Blair reminded him. "You got me back."

"He needs to pay for what he did," Chuck whispered. "He hurt you. He took your mother away from you."

"He will pay for what he did. I've talked to the DA. There's no deal. He has nothing they want. He will never breathe free air again."

"But he'll still draw breath, and your mother won't," he replied.

Blair closed her eyes and turned her head away, "It won't bring her back."

"I know," he nodded into her shoulder.

"And it won't bring you any peace," Blair turned back to him. "A life for a life isn't the way to bring yourself any happiness."

"You and the children do that for me," he smiled slightly.

Blair put arms around his neck and pressed her forehead against his, "Then let us continue to do that. Let the police and the DA handle this. Come home with me now and forget about work until Monday."

It took a few moments, but Chuck began to nod in agreement.

"C'mon," Blair slid off the desk and took his hand in hers as she led him to the door.

As they walked down the hall, Chuck put his arm around her neck and pressed a kiss to the side of her head, "Thank you."

Blair turned and smiled at him, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. She knew she'd said all the right things and she truly did mean the words, but there was a part of her that agreed with Chuck, and she didn't know how to reconcile the conflicted emotions inside herself.

"Let's go hug our children," Chuck suggested, "Let's be reminded of what's good in this world."

And just like that, her inner turmoil was resolved.

She'd be the better person because of her children. They made it all worth it.


	25. Chapter 25

Gotta ask. Does anyone else want to shake the writers of GG and say 'Stop with the plot devices already?' Because that is what this Raina chick is. Anyway, thanks to all who responded and to my beta. Replies make me feel good.

Chuck exited the elevator one night after work and walked right into chaos formerly known as his home.

"How did you let the books get this bad, Dan?" Blair was saying into the phone as she tried to get Sabrina to quiet down by shaking her daughter's favorite toy in front of her face.

"What do you want from me, Blair? I run the show with virtually zero help from you."

"I am recovering from a gunshot!"

"Sue me for not being the math whiz."

"You could've asked for help. Do you know how many accountants Bass Industries employs?" Blair shouted. Her anger only made Sabrina cry that much harder. Normally, she would be sympathetic to her daughter's pain, but she had found that point. She was ready to snap herself. "It would've taken one two minute phone call to Lily or me."

"Fine, fire me or do whatever you need to do," Dan responded. "The cafe is still turning a profit. I know that much, so you could be a tiny bit grateful."

"If I fire you, I would probably have to close the café, and I'm pretty sure that Serena and Lily would never talk to me again." Blair finally noticed Chuck and gave him a tiny wave of acknowledgment. "Look, Dan, I know you probably saved my business. I am grateful, but don't be your father's son when it comes to asking for help, okay?"

"Fine, look Jonathan just woke up from his nap, so I have a few minutes to feed him before I have to get to your cafe. We can talk about this later."

Blair tossed the phone aside as she spun towards Chuck.

"Chuck, I have never been so happy to see you in all my life," Blair exclaimed as she thrust Sabrina into his arms.

"Not that I don't love such a greeting, but what's wrong?" Chuck inquired as he gently began to rub Sabrina's back as she cried out in discomfort.

"My books are a mess. Sabrina is teething and won't stop crying. Something has to give, or I might lose my mind," Blair responded tearfully.

"Which do you want me to do? Your books or take care of Sabrina?" he inquired.

"Sabrina," Blair said. "Take Sabrina on a walk or to the Palace. You still own that right? Just give me a few hours to make sense out of my books, so I know exactly how many math classes I need to sign Humphrey up for."

"How about I take both?" Chuck told her as he offered Sabrina his finger to suck on to relieve her discomfort as he made his way to the fridge to find her a teething ring. "That will give you a guaranteed few hours of quiet."

"No, I can handle the books. I just can't handle a screaming daughter and my books at the same time. Sebastian is over at Serena's because when Sabrina started screaming I thought maybe she was sick, and I didn't want Sebastian to get ill. Then the doctor told me what was wrong. About ten minutes after we got home, Fed Ex arrived with the disaster area known as the café books and she started screaming at the top of her lungs and hasn't stopped since. I love my daughter, but, Chuck, if you don't take her and give me some quiet, I'm walking off the balcony."

"Okay, calm down," Chuck told her as he caressed her back softly, "I'll take Sabrina for a little father/daughter bonding time. On my way home, I'll stop by Serena's and pick up Sebastian. All you need to do is call me when it's safe to come home."

"I'm sorry," Blair responded tearfully as she looked to her daughter with guilt spread across her face. "I'm such a horrible mother right now."

"No, you're an overtired and overwhelmed mother right now. I'm sure Eleanor, Lily, and Anne passed off you, Serena, and Nate to whatever nanny or maid was in the vicinity for a lot less," Chuck reassured her. "It's okay to ask for help when you get in over your head."

"That's pretty smart. Where'd you hear it?"

"You," Chuck smiled and kissed her.

"You're pretty terrific sometimes," she sniffled as she looked at the cute picture her daughter made in her father's arms as she sucked happily on the teething ring Chuck had given her. There was even the faintest hint of a smile on her face, a rare sight on this particular day.

"I won't be more than a few hours. Don't eat. I'll tell you what to bring home for dinner," Blair kissed his cheek and Sabrina's forehead. "Mommy loves you so much, but right now she has work to do."

"So what do you think Sabrina? A stroll in the park or a carriage ride?" Chuck inquired as he gathered Sabrina's belongings for a few hours out, "Or do you have a better idea?"

-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair set the table as she waited for Chuck to come home. She looked over her shoulder when the elevator dinged and smiled when Chuck came in holding both carriers and a diaper bag slung over his shoulder.

"Look at the proud father," Blair smiled. "Dinner's on the way up. I ordered room service."

"What did I do to deserve such a beautiful dinner table?" Chuck inquired as he looked behind her as she finished arranging the candles. She'd pulled out all the stops including rose petals. "And an even more beautiful dinner companion?"

"You rescued me from having a meltdown today, and I thank you," Blair approached him slowly. "How'd they do?"

"They were the envy of everyone in the park, naturally," Chuck responded. "And give Sabrina a frozen Popsicle, and she is the happiest camper in the world right now."

"Explains the purple goo all over her dress," Blair cringed as she felt the stickiness with her own fingers.

"She'll probably need a bath," Chuck agreed, "Which I'll happily give her right now if you need a bit more quiet time."

"You know something, I'll do it. Go get Sebastian into his pajamas and then get into something a little more comfortable yourself. Room service has orders to set the food up when they get here."

"Alright, Little Man, it's time for a little guy bonding time," Chuck responded as Blair took Sabrina from him, "I'll teach you how to belch the alphabet and write your name into the snow."

"Don't you dare, Chuck Bass," Blair called out to him.

"It's so much fun getting a rise out of your mommy," Chuck laughed. His son mimicked his response and laughed along with him while pulling his socks off his feet as he was so fond of doing.

"Alright Sabrina, we're going to give you a bath and while I do that, I'm going to teach you the art of rolling your eyes when men are being infantile."

"Hey," Chuck exclaimed as he pretended to be insulted.

-x-x-x-x-

"Alone at last," Blair handed Chuck a glass of wine before she took her seat in the chair across from. "You've earned this, so don't volunteer to be sober with me tonight."

"Are you feeling less frazzled?" he inquired as he took a tiny sip. He had no intention of drinking more than the one glass she offered.

"My books aren't a mess anymore, and my daughter is calm. I feel great."

"How did your doctor's appointment go today?" Chuck inquired as he heard something in her response that sounded a little hesitant.

"Not as well as I had hoped," she frowned. "I'm getting better, but not enough to where he feels comfortable with lifting the restrictions."

"I could offer a bribe, if you'd like," Chuck joked in an attempt to cheer her up.

"I appreciate that, but dying inflagrante delecto is not on my top ten list of things to do before I turn thirty. Of course becoming a mother at barely twenty wasn't on there either but sometimes the best things in life come out of nowhere."

"That they do," Chuck nodded as his eyes settled on a picture of the twins.

"So, back to your heroism. To you," Blair raised a glass. "You saved me. I love you. I think I might want to have your baby. Oops, too late."

"Is that a Freudian slip?" Chuck inquired as he took another small sip, "Or your way of broaching the subject about adding to our family?"

"It was meant to be a joke, not taken seriously at all," she replied.

"So, you don't want to?"

"Not right now," Blair shook her head. "If we did, the children we have would be barely a year old when it was born. Do you want more children?"

"I'm still getting use to the idea of the two that we have," he admitted, "But someday, if we're lucky enough…I guess more children could be in order."

Blair stood up from her seat and went around the table. She sat herself in Chuck's lap and looked into his eyes, "You're a better man than you could ever know and a better man than Bart could ever see."

"As long as you can see, that's all that matters to me anymore," he told her as he traced her chin softly with his finger.

"I was really hoping the doctor would lift the restrictions," she frowned, "Because sleeping so close to you and being like this with you becomes harder each day."

"Harder is definitely the right word," Chuck smirked.

Blair slapped his chest gently and smiled at him, "I meant it you know. I love you, and you did save me. And I'm proud to have had your children."

"As I'm proud to have you as their mother," Chuck responded. "And I'll continue to wait, as long as needed. Your health and the health of our children are the most important thing to me, so much more than the lustful urges that I get with you wiggling around on my lap."

"You're still heinous, sometimes," she groaned as she slapped at his chest.

"It's part of my charm," Chuck smiled.

"I don't recall finding your smarminess at all charming," she pouted.

"It must have been," he chuckled, "Because you are still sitting in my lap, and those two adorable children exist for some reason."

"Temporary insanity," she rolled her eyes. "Like two years worth."

"So, not so temporary," Chuck nodded.

"No, I fell insanely in love with the Upper East Side's biggest playboy," Blair shook her head in disbelief. "And the really amazing part?"

"He fell in love back, right," Chuck smiled.

"Yes, he did."

"When is your next doctor's appointment?" he inquired as she began nuzzling his neck.

"Two weeks," she said. "Sorry."

"Believe me, no one is sorrier than I am."

"Except maybe Little Chuck Junior," she snickered.

"Little," Chuck scoffed. "There is nothing little about Chuck Junior."

"Men and their precious egos," Blair rolled her eyes as she stood up from his lap and returned to her chair.

"So, to change the subject, I spoke with Lily on my way home. Apparently Serena informed her of our screaming daughter and Humphrey's lousy math skills. She wanted to know if she could help. When I said we had it handled she moved on to Eric's high school graduation."

"I cannot believe Eric's graduating high school," Blair shook her head in disbelief. "There are times when I go to Serena's, and I still expect him to be seven years old and complaining about his math homework."

"Lily wants to throw him a party, but he's trying to convince her that it should be a low key family affair. She wants me to help change his mind," Chuck explained.

"And you're hesitant about getting involved," Blair concluded.

"Yes, a little," Chuck confirmed with a nod. "I think I should stay out of things right now, especially now that Rufus is getting help."

"We could do a cross between it. Have a party and just invite family," Blair suggested.

"I don't think that's what Lily has in mind," he shook his head, "I think she wants to make up for all that she's put him through over the years by giving him the gigantic party of the century."

"That's not Eric," Blair groaned.

"Or a good idea considering this family's history with parties," Chuck pointed out. "Every time this family has a party something happens."

"Not always something good," Blair pointed out.

"Exactly," Chuck nodded. "I think I'll talk to Lily tomorrow."

"Take her out for lunch. She won't make a scene if you're in a public place."

"Just further evidence that you and I are perfect for each other. I was thinking right along those very lines."

"Hey, speaking of family parties, Serena keeps changing the subject every time I bring up Cece. Has Lily said anything to you?"

"About Cece? No," he shook his head.

"I haven't heard from her in the entire time I've been back. I mean you'd think I'd get a card or something. Mom and Lily have been friends forever."

"What is that diabolical mind of yours thinking?" Chuck inquired as he saw the wheels churning.

"I wonder if Cece is sicker than Lily's letting on."

"Surely, she would have mentioned something by now," Chuck shook his head, "Cece and I aren't blood, but she took me under her wing so to speak."

Blair looked at him skeptically.

"She lets me call her 'Grandmother' at least," he clarified.

"And she has two great grandchildren that she's never shown any interest in meeting," Blair added.

"That's not Cece."

"No, it's not," Blair shook her head. "Did you know that after my grandmother died she made me practice getting up on furniture and saying 'That will be quite enough' in a very loud and commanding voice?"

"What was the point of that?" Chuck eyed her curiously.

"I'm sure you remember that my grandmother and I were both small and sometimes we were overlooked, so we had to think of ways to get attention. When my family fought, Grandmother would get up on a piece of furniture and say 'That will be quite enough' to get everyone to shut up and listen to each other."

"No, I remember," Chuck laughed, "Why would Cece make you practice? You've always been skilled at commanding a room when you wanted the attention."

"I think she just wanted to make me laugh," Blair said. "She made Serena do it too."

"Serena used that particular method to get me and your father to stop fighting one day."

"Did it work?" she inquired.

"Quite well," Chuck nodded.

"Then the practice paid off," she smiled.

"You know the clearest memory I have of your grandmother doing that was when we were eight years old and she stood on your dining room table and yelled at everyone during Easter dinner."

"One of her most memorable performances," Blair smiled. "She was a pretty head strong woman. I think that's where I got it."

"And where Sabrina will ultimately get it from," Chuck smiled.

"Sure you wanna do this? Live with two headstrong women?"

"Don't have much choice, do I?" he smiled, "I'm father to one and head over heels in love with the other."

"Stop that," Blair said with a smile. "You being this charming is making it hard to keep my clothes on."

"By all means, lose the clothes," he chuckled, "We can keep navigating around these restrictions."

"Well, I think," Blair got up from her seat, "that I should navigate you around these restrictions. You've definitely earned it."

"How about I pilot the ship tonight?" he suggested, "It doesn't always have to be about me."

"Heart rate, remember," Blair said. "I have to keep it low."

"I hate hearing that," Chuck said.

"I know. It's too real a reminder."

"How are we supposed to build up to making love - one of the most physically demanding activities I've found when I'm with you - if we can't even push your heart rate up a few extra beats a minute with a little foreplay?"

"Alright, maybe I'm a little nervous about being together again. It's been a long time between times and while I haven't since the last time you and I were together, I know there had to have been someone, perhaps several someones, while you were in Europe, and I guess maybe I'm a little scared that your memory may have embellished how good we are together," Blair twisted her hands together as she spoke and she frowned when she realized they were slightly stuck.

"Trust me, my memory is in perfect working order," Chuck assured her. "You and I are phenomenal in bed, epic even.

Blair shook her head, unable to reply.

"And what's wrong?" Chuck inquired as he caught her frown.

"What if we're not anymore?" Blair asked. "What if I'm permanently damaged from the shooting and from going through childbirth? They say a woman's body changes after pregnancy. And do you have any idea how much childbirth hurts Chuck? It's possibly worse than a gunshot, and I wasn't unconscious for any of it."

"These fears that you have are just that," Chuck assured her. "Sure there will be a little period of…adjustment, and if you don't think you can handle childbirth again, then we'll talk about it when and if we're ready to add to our family."

"In that case, let's see what you can do about raising my heart rate," Blair smiled as she backed towards the bedroom.

"Does this mean I get to pilot tonight?" Chuck inquired as she pulled him along.

"It's a definite possibility," Blair nodded as she backed up against the closed bedroom door. "Just not too wild, okay?"

Chuck nodded as he nudged the door open before he swept her into his arms. "I'll save the rodeo for another night."

Blair's giggle was the only answer.

-x-x-x-x-

"Blair, are you here?" Serena called out a few days later as she looked around the penthouse.

"Kitchen," Blair called.

Serena strolled casually into the kitchen to see Blair twirling around effortlessly. "I envy you right now. I can't even manage toast without setting off the smoke alarms."

Blair was all smiles as she continued her cooking.

"I know that grin, B," Serena studied her closely, "Did you get lucky? Did the doctor lift the restrictions? Oh, god, do I need to leave? Am I interrupting?"

"Yes to the lucky, but no to the last three," Blair smiled. "And don't envy my cooking skills. Be grateful because this dessert is for you and Nate."

"Me and Nate," Serena repeated. "What are you talking about?"

"He wants to have dinner with you, and he wants me to give him some kind of insanely romantic dessert. So I am making 'heart's desire white mocha tiramisu' for the two of you."

"That sounds truly sinful. Am I supposed to act surprised? Is he taking the credit? Oh, god, all I'm doing is peppering you with questions. This is getting annoying."

"Don't worry, I'm used to it," Blair smiled. "And it is truly sinful, trust me. You two are going to want to spread this on each other and then lick it off. Do me a favor and pick up some cheap sheets so that you don't ruin any of the good ones at the penthouse."

"Have you and Chuck tested this first?" she asked as she studied her best friend closely. There was a glow about her that Serena had yet to pinpoint.

"No, I've never made tiramisu for Chuck. If I do, I'm gonna use a traditional recipe. I'm using this one because I know you and Nate have a thing for white chocolate."

"But you've tested this right?" Serena asked nervously, "We're not the guinea pigs for the two of you, are we?"

"I am not using you two as guinea pigs for sexual exploits," Blair frowned. "I am using this recipe because I have this cookbook full of chocolate cakes. Nate asked me for a favor. I know you two both like white chocolate, so I thought you'd like this. If you'd rather I made something boring then by all means tell me, and I'll give this to Dorota so she and Vanya can have some fun."

"Don't you dare!" Serena exclaimed, "I'm merely looking for details because you're glowing, yet you just said the doctor hasn't lifted the restrictions. Is Chuck getting creative?"

"Chuck's always been creative. And my sex life is really none of your business."

"Come on, B," Serena whined, "Let me live vicariously. Nate's great and all, but we both know he's not nearly on the same level as Chuck, at least you know."

"You need a hobby or a job or to take more classes," Blair laughed.

"Speaking of jobs, how would you like some help at the cafe this summer?" Serena asked.

"Really?"

"Yeah, Rufus will be getting out of rehab by then, and I think it's important to give him and Mom some time alone. Eric and I were thinking maybe we'd go give Dan a hand and stay in your old apartment."

"Is this going to be a paid thing?" she inquired.

"I was thinking an even swap. We crash at your place for free in exchange for our services. Plus, we'll be able to help Dan with his son, so it's a win-win all around."

"Sounds like a good idea. It'll be nice to have you two around while I'm easing back into the day-to-day of it."

"Are you going back?" Serena responded in surprise, "Why is this the first I'm hearing of it?"

"Because I haven't talked to Chuck about it yet," Blair said. "And I'm still a little freaked about the idea of walking back into the place where my mom died."

"Have you been back to the café at all since it happened?" Serena asked gently as she tiptoed her way through a potential emotional mine field.

"No," Blair replied, "And I'm pretty sure Chuck is not going to like the idea of me going back to it at all. I think he'd prefer if I just sold it."

"Have you considered it?" Serena asked.

"Yes, but there's this little voice inside my head that says it's the coward's way out every time I think of it."

"If you do go back, how is Chuck going to fit into the picture? You'll be in New Jersey. He'll be here running Bass."

"I'm not leaving him again and he's not leaving me," Blair said as she hoisted herself up on the counter and leaned back against the cabinets. "As far as we go, we're staying put. But with our businesses, I don't know what's going to happen there."

"And the children?" Serena prompted her, "You can't pull them back and forth all the time. I've lived that life. It's not fun or fair to them."

"We clearly have issues," Blair conceded.

"Clearly," Serena nodded.

"Maybe I can convince Chuck to buy a houseboat and park it in the river. That way we can just sail back and forth."

"Keep thinking," Serena advised her, "That's quite possibly the worst idea you've ever had."

"Where is your sense of humor?" Blair laughed.

"I think I lost it when my step-brother and my best friend nearly died on me less than a year apart."

"Such a downer today," Blair sighed.

"Yeah, you're right. Happier thoughts," Serena said.

"Your dessert is done, and Nate's going to be here any time now to pick it up. You should get going, so you're home when he shows up with dinner and dessert to surprise you."

"Act surprised, got it," Serena replied, "But I'm going to stop in quickly and check on those adorable chubby cheeks. Give me some sort of warning if Nate shows up."

"Just don't wake them up. Sebastian is now getting in on the teething act."

"Poor things," Serena pouted as she disappeared.

Blair finished loading the dishwasher and when she stood up she gasped as a pair of familiar arms slid around her waist.

"I didn't even hear the elevator."

"I had maintenance disable the chime so I could surprise you," Chuck mumbled against her neck as he began peppering her skin with kisses.

"Stop that, we're not alone, and we're about to get another visitor."

"Who would possibly interrupt us when we're about to get to the good stuff," Chuck whispered darkly just before he bit sharply on her ear.

"My best friend and yours."

His hands were in the process of removing her apron. "Good," he smiled, "We can have them stay with the children. I'll take you to the Palace for the night. It can be just you and me with no interruptions."

"See that," Blair pointed to the elaborate looking dessert on the counter. "Nate requested that I make that for him and Serena. He'll be here any minute to pick it up. He wants to get romantic with her tonight. Apparently you've inspired him to be more attentive to Serena."

"Well, I'll just uninspire him," Chuck replied.

"That's not even a word, Chuck," Blair informed him.

"Too bad," Chuck almost growled. "I want an uninterrupted night with you, and if I have to break my best friend's legs to get it, I will."

"Charles Bass, don't you dare," Blair scolded him.

"I can't be in too much trouble if you didn't even bother with the middle name," he chuckled.

"I made Nate tiramisu. Let's let him and Serena have their night and then tomorrow night, I will remind Nate that he owes me a favor, and you and I will be all alone."

"Tomorrow night is not soon enough," he groaned in disappointment.

"Well, it's going to have to be," Blair said. "Because, we cannot use the dessert I made for Nate and Serena."

"Why not?"

"Neither of us likes white chocolate."

"I'd be willing to eat it if I ate it off of you," Chuck told her.

"Tomorrow, I promise."

"And tonight?"

"Tonight, we have dinner, and we just hang out together. If you're good maybe we can even make out like we did in high school."

"Will you put on the red tights?"

"Don't answer that until I leave," Serena said from the door. "See you guys later."

"Night Serena," Blair smiled.

"Night," Serena called over her shoulder.

"And now we wait for Nathaniel?"

"Yes," Blair nodded. "Why don't you go take a shower and relax while I take care of Nate? He'll be here soon."

"This, right here, is very relaxing," Chuck told her.

"Go take a shower anyway. It'll give me some time to start dinner."

"Let me take care of dinner tonight."

"You can't cook," Blair said.

"I didn't say I was going to cook," Chuck smirked.

"Blair, are you here?"

"Perfect timing," Blair said. "In the kitchen, Nate."

"Hey, Chuck, you're home early," Nate greeted the pair, ignoring how close Chuck had Blair to him.

"Your dessert's all ready to go, Nate," Blair said as she pulled away from Chuck and went over to the counter. "I hope you enjoy it."

"It smells amazing," Nate stated. As he turned to look at Chuck, he caught the scowl on his best friend's face. "What's wrong? Am I interrupting something?"

"No, and that's kind of the problem, at least according to him," Blair said.

"Am I suppose to understand what that means?" Nate shook his head as her riddle spun too quickly for him to translate.

"No," Chuck told him, "Just go enjoy your dessert off Serena. Tomorrow Blair's calling in the favor. You're watching the children so she and I can have our own playtime."

"Just let me know when and where we have to be to watch our godchildren."

"My mom's so that Dorota can supervise," Blair said handing the dessert over. "It's tiramisu."

"And Serena doesn't have a clue right," Nate replied, "I get to take the credit for this."

"If you can convince her you made it, then you deserve to take the credit," Chuck laughed.

"Serena actually called and wanted to know if we'd seen you. I think she misses you. You should get home," Blair said.

"I'm on my way," Nate responded as he disappeared as quickly as he'd come.

"He really thinks he can convince Serena he made that himself," Chuck laughed. "I think I gave him too much pot in our youth. He's killed entirely too many brain cells."

Blair giggled, "Have I mentioned how wonderful you are?"

"Certainly not today," he sighed as he pulled her back into his arms. "So I'm waiting very patiently."

"You're wonderful," Blair smiled. "And I'm eternally grateful that I stripped on the stage of Victrola when I was sixteen because it got us here."

"So am I," he groaned, "How about after the children are asleep, you strip for me again, only this time you don't have to stop at the slip."

"There's a good possibility."


	26. Chapter 26

I loved all the replies I got last time. I am thoroughly sickened by GG these days. Stop with the obstacles already. I am so very glad my beta is back from vacation. I look forward to hearing what you all think of this chapter.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Chapter 26-

Blair stood up on her tiptoes and scanned the crowd that surrounded her. Aha!

"Eric," she waved her hand to get the younger boy's attention.

Eric looked up and then made his excuses to the group of classmates he was talking to before he headed towards Blair.

"Congratulations," Blair hugged him. "Do you feel smarter now?"

"Just relieved," Eric stated with a sigh of relief. "It's over."

"Now you get to do it all over again with college," Blair teased.

"Can't wait," Eric shrugged nervously. "It can't be any worse than high school, right?"

"You're asking the wrong person. I did one year and then I dropped out to have children and own a café."

"Do you ever think of going back?" Eric inquired as Blair fixed his tassel that had gone askew.

"No," Blair shook his head. "College is about finding out what you want to do and I already know what I want to do. I want to be a good mom, make my business a success, and spend the rest of my life with your brother."

"All you ever talked about growing up is going to college," Eric reminded her.

"You'll understand this when it happens to you," Blair said. "Having children changes things."

"That it does," Chuck slipped his arms around Blair's waist. "Congratulations, Eric."

"Thanks, Big Bro," Eric smiled.

"Lily still monopolizing the twins?" Blair asked as she turned towards the three woman that were cooing in the direction of the children who were giggling in response.

"Along with Serena and Dorota," Chuck nodded. "I've been sent over here under the guise of getting Eric to come out with me for a celebratory lunch while they get the party ready."

"I thought you talked Lily out of that," Blair frowned.

"I thought I did too. Sorry Eric," Chuck said.

"I expected as much," Eric conceded, "Her heart is in the right place."

"So, can I crash lunch with you or am I expected to go to the penthouse and help out with the party?"

"I think you're expected at the party to provide your expert opinion on party favors."

Blair sighed, "I'll take the kids with me. You enjoy yourselves."

She gave Eric a hug, "Did I mention I'm proud of you?"

"Yes," Eric nodded. "Thank you."

"Don't eat too much or your mom will kill us," Blair warned them.

"You are the best big sister," Eric responded as he hugged her tight.

"Aside from Serena," Blair added.

"No," Eric shook his head. "But don't worry, I won't tell her."

"I love you, you know that, right," Blair smiled. "And I think I might kill you for making me cry."

"We'll be back soon," Chuck told her as he kissed her temple gently.

"Behave, Bass," Blair cautioned him.

"No strip clubs, got it," Chuck smirked.

"No female strip clubs," Blair amended.

"Someday, I'm going to take you to a male one," Chuck laughed. "They do have the best chicken marsala."

"Do they even have chicken marsala?"

"Yes, they do," Eric nodded.

"You are such a bad influence on him," Blair shook her head at Chuck. "See you soon."

-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair looked at Serena as she held one end of the banner while her friend held the other, "Is this level?"

"I don't know. Dan, is this level?" Serena called over her shoulder.

"No," Dan laughed at the horribly aligned banner. "Serena either your side needs to go up about six inches or Blair's down. You two work it out."

"Three inches each way," Serena and Blair responded in unison.

"Works for me," Dan said.

Both giggled at their like mindedness.

Blair finished adjusting her end and turned in time to see Serena step off the stool she'd been using. Dan gave Blair his hand, "Miss Thayer."

"Waldorf," Blair corrected him.

"You went back," Dan asked.

"It was official last Monday."

"What made you change your mind?" Serena inquired.

"I am a Waldorf. It doesn't matter what name I use. Thayer is what I used when I was running from my problems. I'm not running anymore. I'm Blair Waldorf, and as Chuck pointed out, I should be proud of that."

"Well, I for one am thrilled," Serena hugged her best friend.

"Me too," Blair nodded.

"Does this mean you're changing the café name?" Dan asked.

"No, that's still going to be Thayer's."

"Keeping a memento of the past doesn't hurt, I guess," Dan replied.

"It's good to have that reminder of where I've been," Blair nodded. "And where I can go."

"Good for you, B," Serena smiled.

"And speaking of the café, when do I get to put an original Daniel R. Humphrey book on my shelves," Blair looked to Dan.

"When I find someone to actually publish my work," Dan grumbled. "This getting published thing is a lot harder than it seemed a few years ago."

"How about some obscure printing press?" Blair ventured. "I'll loan you the money and you can pay me back when it's discovered by some fabulous publishing house."

"Let me go the conventional way first, but I might just take you up on the offer if I can't get any fish to bite."

"Deal," Blair shook his hand. "So, is Lily still doing the doting grandma thing?"

"She's just trying to get out of doing the decorations," Serena replied. "My mother loves to plan parties, but isn't all too keen on setting them up or cleaning up after."

"Blair, your children are simply too adorable for their own good," Lily exclaimed as she and Dorota approached with a child in each of their arms.

"Where's Jonathan?" Dan asked.

"Mr. Jonathan fall asleep, Mr. Dan," Dorota said. "He and Anna kink out."

"That's conk out, Dorota," Blair smiled.

"Right, Miss Blair," Dorota nodded.

"Never in a million years could I have guessed one year ago we'd have so many babies in this house," Lily responded, "But I wouldn't trade any of these adorable cheeks for anything."

"So, how many people are coming today, Lily?" Blair asked.

"I lost count," Lily replied, "All of Eric's classmates, from what I've gathered, and anyone they felt like including."

"So this place will be busting at the seams," Serena concluded, "Did we hide all the valuables?"

"We don't have that much time," Dan quipped.

"You two are horrible," Lily scolded.

"Lily, think of Serena's thirteenth birthday party," Blair reminded her.

"I really did love that vase," Lily sighed.

"My point exactly," Serena chimed in.

"But on the plus side, there really isn't that much out that I have a sentimental attachment to anymore," Lily replied.

"Yes, my father took care of that," Dan added glumly.

"How is Rufus?" Blair asked Dan.

"Getting better. The doctors were willing to let him out for this, but he didn't think he could handle it seeing as it's something Jenny will never experience."

"At least he's admitting that he didn't think he could handle it," Blair replied. "That's a positive sign."

"I guess," Dan shrugged. His eyes were beginning to tear up at the mention of his sister and the celebration that she should have been included in.

Serena noticed immediately and put her arms around him.

"Are you sure you're up for this?" Serena asked softly.

"Yeah, Eric and Jenny may have been fighting, but she'd want me to be here for this because they were best friends once upon a time."

"Hey, I thought this was a party," Nate's voice said from the hallway. "I hear no music or fun of any kind."

"You're a little early," Serena told him as she grabbed his wrist to look at the time. "This is what a party looks like before the guests arrive. I know it's a foreign concept for you."

"Ouch, that seemed a tad harsh," Nate winced.

"Lily, did he ever pay for the vase he broke?" Blair smirked.

"Nathaniel, you broke my vase!" Lily exclaimed.

"I was thirteen and high," Nate said.

"What!" Lily shouted.

"Okay, forget I said anything," Nate responded quickly, "How much do I owe you?"

"That vase was an heirloom."

"A lot," Blair nodded.

"The family estate is loaded with heirlooms that I'm sure nobody will miss. Come for a visit and take whichever you'd like," Nate offered.

"That's very generous, Nathaniel," Lily replied as she shook her head in disbelief.

"Didn't you and Chuck used to play that trade the family knick-knack game when we were young?" Blair asked.

"I have got to stop telling you and Serena things," Nate groaned.

"Was that considered pillow talk?" Dan inquired.

"No," Blair responded quickly, "Archibald wasn't much good at pillow talk."

"Mother in the room," Lily reminded them.

"As if this is news to you," Serena rolled her eyes.

"I'd like to keep a few mysteries," Lily told her.

"When do the guest of honor and all his guests arrive?" Nate inquired.

"Soon, I hope," Lily said. "I'd like him to get here before the guests."

"I'm sorry Cece won't be here," Blair said.

"She sends her love," Lily replied, "And she wants pictures of her great grandchildren to brag to all her friends."

"How is Cece?" Blair inquired.

"She's alright. She's just getting on in years and doesn't like to travel as much as she used to. I promised we'd visit soon. I told her we're waiting until you can fly."

"Is that really the reason?" Blair asked skeptically. Her recent conversation with Chuck regarding Cece's health began replaying in her mind.

"Mom, is Grandma alright?" Serena asked.

"Your grandmother is just fine, I promise," Lily replied, "And you can see for yourself soon."

"Why don't I believe her?" Dan mumbled softly so that only Serena and Blair could hear.

Serena and Blair nodded in agreement, but decided to let the conversation drop for the moment as Blair's phone beeped. Chuck had sent her a quick message that he and Eric were on just arriving at the building.

"Good, Eric's here," Blair announced. "They'll be up soon."

"The caterers have finished setting up."

"Maybe we should take the babies upstairs," Blair suggested.

Blair took Sebastian from Lily and followed Dorota upstairs to the nursery as everyone else waited eagerly for the new graduate.

-c-c-c-c-c-c-

"Do I have to act surprised when I step off the elevator?" Eric groaned.

"I doubt it," Chuck shook his head. "So, how does it feel to be a high school graduate? After all, now you're qualified to get any job you want that involves a paper hat."

"Just what I always wanted, to start a paper hat collection," Eric laughed, "Any advice as to where I should apply first?"

"I hear the McDonald's down the street from Constance is hiring," Chuck teased.

"I've always wanted to work there. I hear they have an excellent managerial program," Eric laughed.

Chuck laughed, "Only do it if you want to give Lily a heart attack."

"Seriously, I need some advice," Eric responded as he sobered up. "I have five college acceptance letters staring me in the face and no clue which one to take."

"Whichever one you choose to accept will be lucky to have you," Chuck told him.

"That's a cop out," Eric called him out. "I want your advice."

"I'm not the best person to give advice on colleges," Chuck told him, "Blair is the one you should be asking."

"She's going to tell me Yale," Eric responded.

"She might surprise you," Chuck replied.

"Actually, I'm more worried about her decision," Eric said.

"What do you mean?"

"She doesn't want to go back to school."

"What do you mean she doesn't want to go back to school?" Chuck's eyes went wide in surprise. This was the first he was hearing of it. He knew NYU was out, but Columbia had accepted her. He'd always anticipated her going back to college when the children got a little older.

"That's the conversation you walked in on before."

"Really?"

"She said she's happy with what she's doing now."

"She's a full time parent," Chuck replied, "That's never going to be enough for her."

"She's also a business owner," Eric reminded him, "You know, Chuck, eventually she's going to want to go back to the cafe."

"Over my dead body," Chuck shook his head.

"She started that place," Eric said. "Did you really think she'd give it up?"

"She can continue to manage," Chuck responded, "From a distance. I don't want her to go anywhere near that place ever again."

"And who do you think she's going to be okay with doing the day to day? Because if you have Dan in mind, you're delusional. He nearly drove her under just handling the books."

"No, forget it," Chuck shook his head, "She is not getting anywhere near that cafe ever again. Conversation closed."

"This is Blair, remember," Eric reminded him, "The conversation will never be closed until she has her own way."

"Not going to happen," Chuck continued to shake his head, "I will never cave on this."

"Neither will she," Eric told him.

Chuck leaned back against the wall of the elevator and sighed. He needed to talk to Blair.

The doors opened and the boys stepped into the penthouse.

"Hey, it's about time," Serena greeted Eric with a hug. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just want to talk to Blair," Chuck stated as he caught Blair walking towards them with a gorgeous smile on her face.

"What's wrong?" Blair asked as she caught the serious expression on his face.

"Privately," Chuck said taking her arm and ushering her up to his old room.

"What's wrong?" Blair inquired as she was spun towards him abruptly. She didn't like the look on his face.

"You wanting to go back to the cafe is what is wrong," he growled.

"This is a surprise to you," Blair raised an eyebrow. "I was always going to go back."

"No," Chuck shook his head. "You nearly died in that place. Your mother did. That place is bad news."

"You're one to talk," Blair exclaimed. "You kept that damn hotel after all the pain and heartache it caused us. I haven't said one word even though I'd rather you sell it."

"So if I sell my hotel, you'll sell the cafe," Chuck offered up a quick compromise.

"Chuck, I put that place together on my own," Blair said. "I built it. It's something I did without help from anyone else. Can you understand how important it is to me?"

"Can you understand that the night you were shot I was on my knees in that place because I saw your blood on the floor along with chalk outlines?"

"That was one night," Blair responded. "I spent countless others on my knees scrubbing those floors until I could see my reflection in them. I'm not going to let one horrible night ruin all of my hard work."

Chuck leaned heavily on the desk against the wall, "I don't want you to think I'm not proud of you or what you built. You did it on your own to provide for our children. But please understand that I never want to get a call from anyone ever again telling me you've been shot."

"I understand that feeling better than you realize," Blair replied as she stepped towards him and caressed the back of his neck softly, "But please Chuck, I need to follow this through."

"Sell it to me. I'll keep it up and running. You can use the money to open a new cafe closer to Manhattan."

Blair shook her head, "I'm keeping it. But, I will consider the cafe closer to Manhattan idea, okay?"

"No, not okay," Chuck shook his head as she pulled her hand away.

Blair sank onto the bed and sighed. "I don't like that you still own the Empire. You don't like me owning Thayer's. But I do have a better compromise."

"We sell them both and move to Iceland?"

"Funny," Blair shook her head. "But you're partially right. We sell them both and buy the run down hotel on the edge of Manhattan. It has a restaurant in the lobby that hasn't had a customer in two weeks."

"So I transform the exterior, and you get to have your own cafe," Chuck stated.

"It's the best of both worlds," she smiled. "You're getting bored with the Empire anyways."

"How did you know that?"

"I know you," Blair said simply. "Besides, this gives us both a fresh start in business."

"And Humphrey?"

"I think he needs to face his demons," Blair said. "So, I'm making him move home."

"How long have you been sitting on this idea?"

"Serena and I went looking for an actual home for our family a few weeks ago when we stumbled upon it. It has a lot of potential, Chuck."

"And you can turn your first profit," she added, "I know you'll sell the Empire for so much more than you bought it for... best your father."

"I've already bested him," Chuck responded, "I'm a better father than he could have possibly been."

"Does that mean we'll do it?" she inquired. "You sell the Empire. I sell Thayer's. We buy this hotel, together, and we transform it into the must see destination in all of New York City."

"Let's do it," Chuck nodded.

Blair shot off the bed and into Chuck's arms, "This will work. I know it will."

"I have no doubts," Chuck squeezed her.

"I don't think anyone's here yet. Do you want to share our news with the family?"

"Let's keep it to ourselves for a couple days. This should be Eric's day."

"I hope I can keep it a secret," Blair giggled. "This is so exciting. The first Waldorf/Bass partnership."

"The second," he told her. "Our children are the first."

Blair gave him a kiss, "You're perfect."

"Not true," he shook his head, "I'm looking at perfection. I come nowhere near it."

"I really want to ignore the doctor's advice for a few hours," she sighed happily.

"We'll fool around tonight," Chuck said. "We'll come as close to breaking the rules as we can without actually breaking them."

"When did you start following the rules?" Blair asked.

"When the consequence of breaking it is a potentially fatal heart attack," Chuck reminded her.

"I love you," she smiled as she kissed his cheek softly.

"I love you," he responded automatically. "We should join the family downstairs."

"Okay," Blair nodded. "By the way, did mention that I managed to get access to the penthouse floor of the hotel while Serena and I were there? The east one has an amazing view."

"Scouting out potential new love nests?" he chuckled.

"Yes, please, Chuck, it's perfect. It's everything I've ever really wanted in a view. With our attention to detail, it will be the perfect expression of our relationship."

"We'll see. I don't really know that I want to raise the twins in a hotel. It's not the best way to grow up."

Blair nodded, "Yeah, I guess. But I don't want to live in my mom's old place either. I think after Serena and Nate don't need it any longer I might talk to Cyrus about selling it."

"So, where shall we live?" Chuck inquired. "If I sell the Empire, we'll be homeless."

"Well, there was one brownstone that had some potential," Blair mused as she and Chuck made their way downstairs. "It'd be nice to live in an actual house."

"Is it close to this hotel of ours?" he inquired.

"Yes," she nodded.

"Then it might work," Chuck nodded.

"There you two are," Eric said. "Everything okay?"

"Everything is perfect," Blair nodded as she gave him an eager smile.

"What's that look?" Eric inquired. "The two of you didn't just get engaged did you?"

"No," Blair shook her head, but her smile was still as eager as ever. Chuck could see she was dying to share their news. She wasn't going to make it ten minutes without telling someone.

"Go ahead and tell him," Chuck encouraged her.

"We're going into business together," Blair smiled.

"What?" Serena said.

"We're buying the hotel we spotted when we went out house hunting," Blair explained.

"The one with the little cafe in the corner of the lobby? Blair, that's great."

"And we're buying that brownstone down the street," Blair added.

"That's even better. You can have Cyrus move into the basement," Serena suggested.

"I am not sticking Cyrus in the basement," Chuck said.

"It's a basement apartment, Chuck," Blair laughed. "And I think he'd love it. It would be perfect for him."

"You still haven't talked to him about returning to New York," Chuck reminded her, "Don't you think you're putting the cart before the horse?"

"But if he sees that we've put a lot of thought into it and that we truly want him here, he'll be easier to convince."

"Alright. We'll go talk to him as soon as we close escrow," Chuck nodded.

Blair wrapped her arms around his neck and as she leaned in she spoke, "Anyone who doesn't want to see me make out with Chuck, leave now."

Serena and Eric quickly scrambled out of the room. Serena was squealing, "Ewwww!"

"At least she's consistent," Chuck laughed just as Blair's lips closed in on his.

Blair smiled as they parted, "We'll iron out all the details tomorrow, okay? Let's go enjoy ourselves with our family."

"Sounds good. When are you telling Humphrey?" Chuck asked as they walked into the main room.

"I don't think I have to," Blair motioned to where Serena was standing. "I'll worry about his reaction tomorrow. Let's start the dancing."

"Anything to have your body pressed against mine," Chuck told her as he pulled her in close.

"Good things come to he who waits," Blair smirked.

"Trust me, I know."

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

Chuck nodded his thanks to a bartender as he was served. He and Blair left the party so she could check on the children. They had agreed to meet at the bar as he wanted something to drink a little stronger than the watered down punch Lily was serving.

"It's Chuck, right," a black woman said from next to him as he sipped a glass of wine.

"It is," he nodded politely.

"I thought so," she nodded. "I've seen your picture in the paper a lot. You're better looking in person."

"You look familiar as well," Chuck replied, groaning inwardly at the thought that he might have hooked up with her at some point. "Have we met before?"

"No, but I've been in the papers as well. Most of the time I'm pictured with my father. I'm Raina Thorpe."

"Ah, I get to meet a villainous Thorpe in the flesh," he sighed in relief. A business adversary was better than a former fling. "How is business these days?

"It's wonderful," she smiled. "And I hear that you've recently taken over the reins at Bass. I would've thought you'd been doing that a lot sooner."

"Long story," Chuck said.

"I'd love to hear it."

"Another time perhaps," he offered.

"I mean it, Chuck," she cooed, "I'd love to hear it, perhaps upstairs in my room."

"I don't think that's a good idea," Chuck declined.

"Hey, there you are," Blair interrupted them. "Sorry I took so long. I was trying to convince Dorota to take a break and enjoy the party for a little bit, but she won't budge. She says she's having a fine time looking after all four of the babies."

"Babies!" Raina exclaimed as she scanned her eyes between the pair as Blair put her arm around his shoulder and caressed it softly as she kissed his cheek.

"Haven't you heard," Chuck laughed, "I'm a father now."

"A very good father," Blair corrected before she looked at the other woman. "Aren't you Raina Thorpe?"

"How did you know that?"

"You wore one of my mom's dresses to some big banquet in Chicago last year. She used to keep a scrapbook of people who wore her dresses. It's nice to meet you," Blair offered her hand. "I'm Blair Waldorf."

"The Blair Waldorf?" Raina replied, "As in Eleanor Waldorf?"

"The very same," Blair nodded.

"I thought you'd disappeared off the face of the earth. Your picture was plastered across the front of every paper for weeks."

"That was his doing," Blair responded as she caressed Chuck's cheek softly.

"What can I say? I was desperate," Chuck smiled at Blair.

"Anyway, I was sorry to hear about your mom. She was very talented," Raina said.

"Thank you," Blair nodded politely.

"Are you ready to return to the party?" Chuck inquired as he pushed his glass away as he wrapped his arm around her waist and brought her in close, "Because I for one could skip the rest of the evening."

"I think if we try to pry Sebastian away from Anna right now, we are going to have two very upset babies on our hands," Blair smiled. "But I haven't danced with the graduate yet so I am going to go find him."

"I'll come with you," he offered.

"Are you planning on dancing with him too?" she teased.

"No, I'll find Lily and dance with her. I think she might be feeling a little lonely. It's the first big party without Rufus around."

"That's very sweet of you," she smiled.

"It was nice to meet you, Raina," Blair added as she turned towards the woman. She had to admit she'd been jealous when she first saw Chuck sitting next to her at the bar, but as she got closer and studied his posture, she quickly realized he wasn't the slightest bit interested.

"You too," Raina nodded and then walked the other way as Blair and Chuck walked back towards the elevator to return to the party.

"Everything okay?" Chuck asked.

"Perfect," Blair smiled.

"I hope my talking with Raina was okay," Chuck stated quickly. "I didn't approach her. She approached me."

"We're good," Blair assured him. "I'm not worried about you, Chuck. I know you're committed to our family."

"I love you, Waldorf," Chuck smiled at her.

"I love you, too," Blair smiled back and then her eyes caught sight of someone she never expected to see again. "Oh my God."

"What?" Chuck replied as his head whipped around in the direction she was looking.

"Okay, so right before I found out I was pregnant for sure, Serena and I went out on a double date with a couple of guys. One of them turned out to be a prince."

"And that is relevant how?"

"He's coming this way."

"The prince?" Chuck added nervously. First a Lord, now a Prince. How the hell was he supposed to compete with that?

"Yes," Blair rubbed her forehead. "How did he even find me? I haven't heard from him since the last time I turned him down for a date after two weeks of him asking me every single day."

Suddenly Louis's eyes locked on Blair and he stepped towards her with a renewed purpose.

Blair began to panic next to Chuck.

"Please, please believe me when I say I went out with him only out of loneliness and to keep myself from panicking over my test results for at least one night," Blair said to Chuck.

"I do, and I'm sorry you ever had to go through any of it by yourself," Chuck pressed a kiss to her forehead with a sigh, regretting not running after Blair that day Dan came in swinging.

"I'll get rid of him quickly," Blair assured him.

"I have a better idea," Chuck said as he pulled Blair to him and gave her an earth shattering kiss.

Blair was so completely taken off guard by his gesture that it took a moment for her to respond.

"My knees are weak," she confessed when she pulled away slightly. She was blushing and as radiant as she'd ever looked.

"Is he gone?"

"Is who gone?" Blair asked.

"God, I love you," he laughed as he looked around to see that the only people in the bar were those tending to it. Her prince had clearly received his message loud and clear. She was taken.

Blair smiled at him and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"Did I ever mention how glad I am that you let your hair go back to brown," Chuck tugged on a curl lightly.

"I just can't pull off blonde," she smirked, "My IQ is simply too high."

"I'm telling Serena you said that," he teased.

"Then I'll tell Serena about the time you and Georgina got busy in her bed," Blair smirked.

"How did you know about that?"

"Georgina gets very chatty when she's high."

"Yet another reason to not repeat that mistake," he groaned.

"Something I've always wondered about," Blair said. "Was she really your first time?"

"No," Chuck shook his head.

"Who was your first then?" Blair pressed.

"Is this really a conversation you want to have right now?" he groaned.

"Yes," she nodded.

"It was the nanny," Chuck admitted quietly.

"That last one you had," Blair asked as she searched her memory. "I always thought she was nailing Bart."

"I think she took some perverse pleasure in nailing both of us."

"That's a little twisted," Blair replied.

"Well, Bart did hire her," Chuck reminded her.

"Okay, I realize we've never had the nanny conversation and before everything went down, I was not going to hire one. But if the time ever comes when we do need to hire one, she's not going to be under sixty."

"Agreed," he chuckled.

"And she'll look sixty," Blair felt the need to add.

"Deal," Chuck nodded. "You know, we could just hire Dorota. Cyrus is probably going to stay in Paris full-time now, unless you manage to convince him to move home, and once college is over, Serena and Nate won't need the penthouse anymore. Dorota could come work for us."

"We'll cross that bridge when the time comes," Blair sighed, "I'm not ready for anyone else to raise my children, even Dorota."

"Okay," Chuck nodded. "We've been speaking a lot about Cyrus today, but have you actually talked to him lately?"

"I called him yesterday while you were at work," Blair admitted as the two wandered out to the balcony. "He tried to put on a good face but there was something in his voice that made me worry about him. I don't like that he's living over there all by himself."

"What can we do about that?" Chuck inquired as he ran his hand along her bare shoulders to ward off the chill in the air.

"Insist that he move back," Blair replied.

"You think that would work?" Chuck asked.

Blair shook her head, "No. He wouldn't want to live in the penthouse again. He got married there. I caught him standing in the living room a couple of times before he left. I think he was just remembering the wedding."

"Maybe he wouldn't want to live in the penthouse again, but if you were serious, I can have the Brownstone basement apartment renovated first. He could be close to you and the children and I believe Aaron is still doing the artistry thing in Brooklyn, so he'd be close by."

Blair leaned her head on Chuck's shoulder, "I'm half afraid to ask because deep down I'm always going to think he blames me for what happened to my mom."

"You are not at fault," Chuck assured her, "Cyrus certainly doesn't see it that way. It happened. The man responsible is in jail and will be for a very long time, if I have anything to say about it."

"You promised," Blair reminded him softly while she continued to look out at the darkening city skyline. She didn't have to elaborate. Chuck knew what he'd promised.

"I promised not to use my influence to enforce the death penalty," Chuck replied, "But he deserves to be in jail for the rest of his life, and I will see to it that he gets exactly what he deserves."

"Okay," Blair nodded. "I want to dance once with Eric, and I know you want to dance with Lily. But then, can we go home? It's been a long day."

"Absolutely," he nodded.

"C'mon," Blair took his hand and pulled him into the main room of the party. She spotted Eric over by the food talking to a classmate. "I don't see Lily."

"I do," Chuck nodded. "She's over there with Serena. You might have to do two dances with Eric. I'm not getting out of here unless I dance with both of the van der Woodsen women."

"Just watch your toes with Serena," Blair giggled, "She's a horrible dancer."

"I remember," he groaned.


	27. Chapter 27

A little over 24 hours 'til the newest Gossip Girl. Hopefully this one won't want to make Chair fans vomit. Anyway, enjoy the chapter. 28's in the process of being finished. My Beta is awesome. Give me replies!

Ch 27

Blair pushed open the door to the hotel's lobby and looked around. She could see how great it probably was at one point and how great it could be given the right amount of work.

"This place reminds me of the hotel in that Muppet movie," Nate said as he came in behind Blair.

"Archibald, you have no vision," Chuck told him.

"It's quaint," Dan said. He walked over to the café and peered in. "This could be a good space."

"If this is decorated right, it could be amazing," Serena smiled.

"This is going to be a classy establishment," Blair told her, "We'll have none of that revealing cleavage motif that you call style."

"Okay, but I think I could help decorate the restaurant," Serena motioned to the door that said closed on it. "Is it ever open?"

"Not for a few years," Chuck stated as he looked at the real estate listing in his leather portfolio he was carrying.

"We'll have to fix that," Blair announced. "I'm thinking elegant and classy. Gourmet cuisine with a grand piano in the center with a classically trained pianist."

"We'll scour Julliard," Chuck smirked.

"I think there is a piano," Dan said squinting through the window of the restaurant that could be accessed from the lobby.

"Are you going to set the café up in the same way you have Thayer's," Nate asked.

"Probably. It works, so why not? And we're near Columbia."

"I don't want this to be a college hangout, Beautiful," Chuck told her.

"The café can be," Blair said. "And if word of mouth spreads, the teachers will start coming for the coffee and books and see the restaurant. Proximity is a good thing."

"At least it's Columbia and not NYU."

"Hey," Dan said insulted as he finally got the café door open. "Serena, did you bring that flashlight like I said to?"

"I forgot," Serena frowned.

"I expected as much," Dan replied as he pulled a flashlight out of his backpack.

"Hey Dan, why don't you go check out the café with your flashlight, Nate, and Serena," Blair asked. "I have a pen light and one on my keys for Chuck and me, so we can check out the restaurant. I want to know what kind of repairs we're going to have to make to the café kitchen and you'll know what has to be done as well as I do."

"After all the books you made me read on code violations, I think I could pass a city inspector test," Dan nodded. "Sure, we'll check it out."

"And you, Mister Bass, are coming with me into the restaurant," Blair told him as she grabbed a hold of his lapel and backed towards the restaurant's locked doors.

"Okay," Chuck followed her and unlocked the doors with the keys he'd gotten from the realtor. "Well, it has some potential."

Blair moved her light around, "It must've been beautiful at one point. The bar's going to need replacing though. The wood's rotted."

"If we can lower that chandelier without breaking it to remove the inches of dust and cobwebs it could be the centerpiece of the entire restaurant," Chuck stated as he redirected Blair's light to the center of the dining room.

"That's where the grand piano should go," Blair stated.

"Kind of like that Michelle Pfeiffer movie," Chuck smirked.

"I can't believe you've seen _The Fabulous Baker Boys_."

"And you?"

"Never had the urge," she shrugged.

"We'll have to watch it."

Blair nodded, "I am curious about something though."

"And that is?"

"Have you ever done it on top of a piano?"

"Are you referring to sex, Waldorf?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"No," he shook his head, "Never had the urge."

"I find that hard to believe," Blair said running a hand over a table top. "Either way, I think we'll have to rectify that."

"Back to the restaurant," he coughed in an attempt to change the subject. There was entirely too much talk about an action he couldn't take until the doctors cleared Blair, and their discussions weren't helping any. "Marble floor."

"Which is nice but we'll have to be careful when it rains. Marble gets slippery. I remember the time my mom went flying across the foyer after Dorota washed the floor and didn't tell her."

"Noted," he nodded as he jotted down their thoughts on the notebook he'd brought with them.

"Satin table clothes," Blair stated as she closed her eyes and tried to envision their restaurant.

"What color?" he inquired.

"Burgundy," Blair smiled. "More practical than white." She wandered behind the bar. "Most of these glasses are still in good shape."

"We have to wait until we find our chef to determine the menu, cuisine and plates," Chuck continued with the notes.

"Fresh flowers on every table and elaborate bouquets around the entire restaurant," Blair chimed in.

"Peonies?" he grinned devilishly.

"Roses," she shook her head. "Keep the peonies between us."

"Done," Chuck smiled with a nod.

"White roses," she added.

"Sounds good to me."

"Liquor license. Good bartenders," Blair said.

"Nothing flashy though," Chuck added. "Capable mixologists, not performers."

"No Brian Flannagan wanna-be's," Blair agreed.

"Okay, now I'm lost. Who's Brian Flannagan?"

"_Cocktail_," Blair smiled. "Tom Cruise."

"I call that we keep all future Tom Cruise references out of our everyday conversations," Chuck stated.

"Okay," Blair nodded with a slight hint of a smirk. "We'll need good cooks and experienced waiters and waitresses. I'll hire the college kids for the café."

"I think we can agree that college kids can stay with the café. We'll hire professional waiters for the restaurant."

Blair nodded as she turned around and faced him again. She looked under the bar, "I found a menu and oh my God."

"What?" he turned towards her quickly, praying she hadn't spotted a rodent that she'd want him to take care of. He didn't do rodents.

"Want a drink," she pulled out a bottle of wine.

"Depends on what's on the label," Chuck stated as he squinted to try to read what was on the bottle.

"Here," Blair handed it over. "You're the wine expert."

"I'm the alcohol expert," he clarified.

"We'll let you take care of the bar then," she replied as she patted his chest affectionately.

"Not bad," Chuck stated as he read the bottle she handed him. "We'll save this for a special occasion."

"Opening night, perhaps," Blair suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Chuck smiled. "So, you think the place can be salvaged?"

"I think there's something here."

"If we hire the right chef, I think we'll have the must see dining establishment in all of New York City. I see six month waiting lists and people selling their souls for a table."

Blair smiled at him, "You know the restaurant's only part of it. We have to decide what kind of look we want the rooms to have."

"Classic elegance, like their owner and namesake."

"You want to name the hotel after me?" Blair gasped in surprise.

"Absolutely," Chuck nodded. "This was your idea. Why not honor you?"

Blair carefully leaned across the counter and kissed Chuck slowly.

"And we should name the restaurant and the café after the children," Chuck added.

"What about you?"

"The storage closest in the basement," he told her with a devilish half smirk.

"You're bad," Blair giggled. "But that's why I love you."

"I'm pretty sure you two are violating a health code by molesting each other at the bar," Nate's voice said from the door.

"You have bad timing, Nate."

"Sorry, I just thought you'd want to know that Serena's planning table decorations that consist of cow creamers at the café."

"Not in this life time," Blair growled.

"She's your best friend," Chuck shook his head, "But Serena's taste has always been suspect. Clothes, decor, boyfriends."

"Hey," Nate exclaimed, "I'm the boyfriend, remember."

"Making my point clear," Chuck laughed jovially.

"C'mon, I have to stop Serena from doing any permanent damage," Blair said as she came out from behind the bar. "Nate, get me a copy of Columbia's paper. I have to find out what's involved in placing a want ad."

"For an interior designer?" Nate frowned in confusion.

"Waiters," Blair scowled.

"Oh. Hey, I could-"

"No."

"But-"

"No," Blair shook her head this time.

"You hired Dan."

"He knows what he's doing."

"Sort of," Chuck chimed in.

"Don't worry. I learned my lesson. Nothing math related besides tallying up a bill and even then he gets a calculator," Blair said walking across the lobby.

"So, Blair, I'm thinking we have these really cute cow creamers on the tables in the café," Serena stated cheerfully as she saw Blair enter the café.

"She's your sister," Blair said to Chuck.

"She's your best friend."

Blair turned to Nate, "She's your girlfriend."

"You won't hire me to work in the café but you want me to tell Serena to forget the cow creamer idea?"

"Yes."

"Hey!" Serena squealed, "That is an adorable idea."

"What are you, van der Woodsen, twelve," Chuck shook his head as he laughed.

"It is an adorable idea Serena."

"See?"

"But only if I were opening a tea house that catered to women sixty five and older or men seeking men," Blair added.

"Or a world full of Serenas'," Chuck added.

"Frightening thought," Nate shivered.

"Hey," Serena frowned at her brother and her boyfriend. "I can hear you, you know?"

"Which is amazing sometimes considering how much blonde hair is on the top of your head," Chuck laughed.

"Be nice," Blair stated as she slapped his shoulder.

"Thank you," Serena said to her friend.

"You're welcome. Where's Humphrey?"

"Kitchen. He was muttering to himself about lighting."

"So, what do you think, Bass?" Nate inquired, "Is this investment worth exploring?"

"Yes," Chuck nodded as Blair crossed to the kitchen. "It's going to happen. But you two are never going to be employees."

"Hey!" the blonde duo exclaimed.

-c-c-c-c-c-

Chuck loosened his tie as he walked off the elevator and into the penthouse. He smiled at the scene in front of him. Blair was sitting on the couch looking through what looked like drawings while Sabrina and Sebastian slept on a blanket on the floor.

Blair looked up, "Hey. Are you early, or am I late?"

"Early," he smiled, "I just couldn't stay away any longer."

Blair smiled back at him as he put his briefcase down and kissed her before he sat down on the couch with her.

"So, what are these?"

"I found a big binder in my mom's office that had a lot of designs for rooms. Apparently on top of fashion, she also dabbled in interior design. I wanted to see if any of them would work for the hotel."

"And what is the verdict?" he inquired as he massaged her shoulders gently.

"I like this one for the regular rooms," Blair showed him a simple bedroom drawing. "The color scheme needs some tweaking but the materials are good."

"Agreed," he nodded, "What about the suites? Anything jump out at you for those?"

"This one," Blair reached over his lap and pulled the pile over to give him a better look. "I think this would work nicely for the suites. I haven't gotten through them all so I don't know if any of them are penthouse worthy, but I figure if they aren't we can ask Lily for her opinion."

Chuck nodded as he pushed the drawings away completely. Since they'd agreed to go into business together, the hotel, café and restaurant is all they had been talking about.

"Tell me something about your day that doesn't involve our business venture," he requested.

"Well, I had lunch with Serena, and then she watched the twins while I visited my doctor."

"Are you okay?" he asked automatically. He hadn't known she had an appointment. He feared that something might have been wrong.

"Yes," Blair smiled. "I'm more than okay. People would say I got really lucky."

"I was thinking that I was the lucky one," Chuck stated.

"You could get lucky, if you wanted to."

"The restrictions?" he inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"Officially lifted."

"And why wasn't that the first thing out of your mouth when I came home?"

"I wanted to work up to it," Blair giggled. "I was going to wait until later and then just tie you to the bed, but I decided that wouldn't be very nice."

"Should I get the limo detailed?" he inquired.

"I was thinking maybe tomorrow night, Lily could baby-sit and we could turn off the phones, lock the elevator down, and have a lot of fun."

"Tomorrow," Chuck frowned, "Do you actually think we'll make to tomorrow?"

"I just want to be completely alone, and Lily has plans for the night."

Chuck clamped his eyes shut as he processed the thought of waiting one more night to have her. "I can wait," he said through gritted teeth.

"If you want, I could call Dorota in, and we can go somewhere else tonight."

"I'll wait until tomorrow," Chuck assured her.

"You sure?"

"Yes," he nodded, "I want the night to be special. It's about more than just sex. We're recommitting ourselves to each other. I want you to be sure that is what you want."

"Of course it's what I want," she responded automatically. "Look at those two adorable children on the floor. We did that. We created them out of our love for each other."

"But I don't want them to be the only reason for you to commit to me," Chuck stated.

"They're not," Blair tried to assure him.

"You sure?"

"The time was coming, Chuck. Before I was shot, the time was coming where I was going to pick up the phone and tell you where I was and that I wanted to see you."

"But would you ever have truly forgiven me if those two did not exist?" Chuck pressed.

"Yes," Blair nodded. "Because as much as I tried to and as much as I wanted to, I couldn't stop loving you. You were who I thought of when I woke up in Paris every morning and you were there every night and this was before I even suspected being pregnant."

"I'd just hate for you to be settling," Chuck sighed.

"Are you settling?" Blair shot his words back at him.

"Never," Chuck shook his head.

"Are you with me because of those two?" she pressed as she pointed towards their children.

"No," he responded quickly.

"Good," Blair smiled. "If I tell you something, can you promise not to say anything to him?"

"Who?"

"Nate."

"Okay."

"Nate was settling. He was safe and the plan for years. You scared the hell out of me because you weren't in my life's plan. But my life's plan sucked."

"Yes, it did," he agreed.

"I'm not planning anymore," Blair stated, "I'm just allowing myself to be in the moment now. To enjoy the moment, enjoy being together with you and our children."

"Good," Chuck smiled. "But if you don't mind, I think I'll plan something."

"Really? What's that?"

"You, me, and a lot of time alone."

"Tomorrow evening," she nodded.

"Deal," Chuck nodded with a smile.


	28. Chapter 28

Okay I think we all need some cheering up. I don't do NC-17, sorry. But I think my beta and I did ourselves proud with this chapter. I look forward to your replies, which have been falling off as of late. I know you're out there. Reply people.

_Chair is endgame_

Chapter 28

"I'm really not liking the idea of helping you shop for sex clothes for your physical reunion with Chuck," Serena groaned as she bounced Sabrina in her lap. "It's a little weird."

"Play with your niece, Serena," Blair rolled her eyes as she twisted back and forth considering a silky nightgown. "Is this revealing enough?"

"I don't know why you're stressing. Chuck's going to come in, rip that off you, and it'll be in the corner of the living room, bedroom, or dining room in five seconds."

"Chuck's got a little more finesse than that."

"There's a bit of trivia I could have gone my entire life without learning," Serena groaned as she made faces at Sabrina.

The little girl was still trying to decide if she was horrified or amused.

"Sebastian still asleep," Blair peeked over.

"Out like a light. He is definitely Chuck's kid. Falls asleep after a bottle," Serena smirked as her eyes glanced towards the boy that was sleeping soundly after draining his bottle in record time. His daddy was going to be so proud. "What do you think about Mommy and Daddy having sex tonight, Sabrina?"

The little girl responded with a giggle.

"She's definitely Chuck's kid," Serena added with a giggle of her own.

"Was there ever any doubt?" Blair smirked.

"No," Serena shook her head. "Not after watching you go through labor. You could only scream that loud at something Chuck had done. Then there was the threat of castration if you ever got a hold of him again."

"Which still isn't out of the question," Blair grinned, "But we'll see how tonight goes first."

"Are you excited for tonight?" Serena inquired curiously.

"Nervous is more like it," Blair admitted as she exhaled a shaky breath.

"What would you be nervous about? For you and Chuck, having sex is as regular of an occurrence as breathing is to most people."

"I guess I'm just nervous about whether or not my heart will hold up," she admitted.

"Okay, that's a little too creepy to think about," Serena frowned.

"Also, whether or not he'll still think we're good together."

"That I wouldn't worry about," Serena replied.

"It's been a long time," Blair reminded her. "A lot has changed between us."

"Not the important things," Serena replied. "You two still love each other and want each other more than any two people I have ever known."

"I hope that's still true after tonight," she bit her lip as she looked into the mirror again. "Maybe the buildup will be better than the actual act. I'm afraid he'll be disappointed."

"In what?" Serena asked. "You? B, the guy took your virginity. You've slept with only him and Nate and as far as I remember, Nate was one time."

"You're forgetting Baizen and Lord Marcus, but what's your point, S?"

"If he's disappointed in you, then he's the disappointment. He's taught you everything you know."

"True," she sighed, "But it's been so long. I might have forgotten some of his teachings."

"He loves you, B," Serena reminded her, "That's all that matters here."

"Yeah," Blair nodded as she spun around once more to give Serena another chance to add her opinion. "So, what do you think?"

"I think the red one would work better."

"But the black one hides my surgical scar a bit more," Blair replied.

"Chuck doesn't care about scars. He has one too."

"Which he hasn't fully explained," Blair added.

"He will," Serena said. "Give him time."

"I'm not even sure I need to know anymore," Blair replied. "It's from the past. We just need to put all that behind us and move towards the life he and I are building for ourselves and our adorable children."

"I think you need to know about this," Serena stated.

"I guess I will when it's the right time," Blair said. "What about the purple one? Chuck likes purple."

"That he does," Serena nodded.

-x-x-x-x-

Chuck looked over a spreadsheet as he leaned back in his chair.

"Mr. Bass? A Mr. Archibald is here to see you," his assistant informed him.

"Send him in."

"The Bad Boy Billionaire hard at work behind a desk on something other than his playboy reputation. Seems a little alternate universe to me," Nate chuckled as he strolled into Chuck's office. "Hot assistant, by the way, does Blair know about her?"

"She's gay," Chuck said without missing a beat. "Water?"

"No, thanks. Gay? Seriously?"

"Yes. I've met her girlfriend. She wears a spiked collar."

"Such a waste," Nate shook his head in disappointment, "But I'm sure that puts Blair mind at ease. Still, do you think she'd ever be up for a threesome?"

"Mind out of the gutter, please," Chuck groaned, "This is a respectable place of business."

Nate lifted an eyebrow as if to say, "Yeah right."

"Well it is now," Chuck clarified. "I'm a family man now. Priorities have shifted."

"Right," Nate nodded. "So, you busy tonight? Serena's got some massive test to study for, so I've been banished from the penthouse."

"I have plans," Chuck smiled.

"You and Blair doing something special?"

"You could say that," Chuck's smile widened.

"What else could I say?" Nate inquired as he caught the Cheshire grin on his best friend's face.

"Nothing if you want to keep your pretty mug intact," Chuck said.

"Oh, someone's getting lucky tonight?" Nate translated the dopey grin on Chuck's face.

"I wouldn't classify making love to Blair as getting lucky," Chuck told him.

"Then how would you classify it?" Nate inquired.

"Going to heaven and back," Chuck responded instantaneously.

"Dude, you are so whipped," Nate stated as he added a sound that was suppose to sound like a crack of the whip though he failed miserably.

"I'm a happy man, Nathaniel. You might want to try it sometime."

"I am," Nate said. "Serena is amazing."

"You two finally figuring things out?" Chuck inquired.

"We're finding our way," Nate nodded. "Not nearly as well as you and Blair, but if everyone compared themselves to the two of you, there would be a lot of lonely people in the world."

"Well, Blair and I were lonely for a long time," Chuck said.

"And most of the time was when she and I were together," Nate added.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"I know," Nate nodded, "But we were unhappy. There is no point in denying it."

"I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't grateful you were such a lousy boyfriend."

"Thanks a lot, Man," Nate muttered.

"Look, if you hadn't been then Blair and I might still be trying to figure out that we belonged together."

"And Sabrina and Sebastian may not exist," Nate added.

"So you're seeing my point," Chuck replied.

"Yeah, I am," Nate nodded. "You and Blair are lucky to have found each other when you did. It saved her and me a lot of trouble."

"And a lot of heartache," Chuck added, "At least in the long run."

"Did I ever apologize for trying to strangle you?" Nate asked.

"No, but I never really apologized for sleeping with Blair twenty minutes after you two broke up."

"So we call it even?" Nate inquired.

"Completely," Chuck laughed.

"Good. You have time for lunch, or are you going home early?"

"I can make time for lunch," Chuck replied, "It will have to be a short one as I would like to get home early."

"Of course you would," Nate nodded.

-x-x-x-

Blair smiled when she heard the elevator slide open and turned around to greet Chuck.

"Something smells fantastic," Chuck stated as he pulled her into his arms.

"More than me?" she teased.

"I was talking about you," Chuck smiled as he began nibbling at her neck playfully. "But is dinner cooking?"

"I made that spinach pie you like. I hope you're hungry."

"I am, but not for food," Chuck smiled against her skin.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to take tonight slow," she smiled nervously as she played at one of the buttons on his dress shirt.

"I don't mind," Chuck shook his head as he traced a finger along her jaw and to her chin. "We can go as slow as you want."

"I'm a little nervous," she told him softly.

"You have nothing to be nervous about," he tried to reassure her. "We go at your pace. If you feel at all uncomfortable, just tell me and I'll stop."

"That's what I'm afraid of," she frowned.

"I don't understand," he frowned to match hers.

"Serena and I took the children shopping today and then out to lunch. I've been monitoring my heart all day. It's been fluttering in anticipation like it used to when you and I were together. I'm afraid I'm going to overreact, and you'll stop."

"I'm not going to take chances with you and your health, understand," Chuck was suddenly serious. "I am not going to lose you because we can't control ourselves."

Blair framed his face with her hands, "I am completely and totally in love with you, do you know that?"

"I do," he confirmed, "Maybe we need a safe word. If you feel like your heart is on overload, that word could signal me to put on the breaks."

"I'm open for suggestions," she smiled.

"How about 'attack'?" Chuck suggested.

"Funny," Blair frowned at him. "But effective. But doesn't that sort of have a double meaning? I could be asking you to attack me with renewed vigor."

"You'll have to choose," Chuck told her, "What is one word that you wouldn't normally utter in the throes of passion?"

"Stop or Eleanor," she bit her lip to keep herself from laughing.

"Okay, that may be the one thing I _never_ want to hear while we're in bed together."

"That's the idea, isn't it?"

"Good point," Chuck smiled as he kissed her softly on the lips. "But for now, let's have dinner."

"Have a seat," she urged him towards the dining room, "I'll be right there."

"Where are you going?"

"To get dinner," Blair disappeared into the kitchen as Chuck took a seat at the table. Blair came out a few moments later and Chuck's mouth dropped open.

"Oh my God."

"I was getting warm in my dress. I hope you don't mind," she said doing a little twirl making the hem of her nightgown flare a little around her thighs as she carried two plates of food towards the table.

"Why would I mind?" he inquired as she set down his meal in front of him and then sat herself in his lap.

"Oh, I don't know. I just feel a little underdressed considering you're still in a suit."

"We need to rectify that," he smiled as she began peeling his jacket off his shoulders just before he loosened his tie.

Blair smiled as she took a bite of her dinner and then fed him some of his, "So, how was your day, Dear?"

"Mind numbingly dull until I stepped off the elevator a few moments ago."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Serena and I went shopping. She's still trying to talk - Chuck, stop trying to look down the front of my nightgown."

"Can you blame me?" he smirked as she put her hand over the lace at the top of her nightgown to hide her cleavage.

"Not since the first night you got me into bed."

"I don't recall a bed in the back of the limo," he laughed. "Though you do make an excellent suggestion for future detailing."

"Funny," Blair smiled. "I figured that was a little more romantic than saying 'not since the night you popped my-"

"Much more romantic," Chuck nodded as he cut her off.

"Are you at all hungry for food?" Blair inquired as his distraction became more apparent as his hands roamed her thighs softly, his fingers beginning to creep under the hem of her recently purchased piece of lingerie.

"Late lunch with Nate," Chuck admitted. "So, not so much."

"This can be reheated later," she suggested as she stood from his lap and pulled him to his feet.

Chuck quickly swept her into his arms and whisked them into their bedroom.

"You sure?" he asked again. "We don't have to."

"Oh, I know that. But we are so doing this," Blair smiled as she began to unbutton his dress shirt.

"I was hoping you'd say that," he said as he proceeded to lift her nightgown over her head revealing herself to him. As his finger traced along the scar over her heart, he felt her heart beating begin to quicken. "You still doing okay?"

"Yes," she nodded as he flatted his hand so that he could feel the full effect of what his seduction was doing to her. She tried to cover herself with her arms, having not been so exposed to him since the children were born. She knew she was still carrying some of the baby weight she'd gained during pregnancy, and she didn't want him to see that.

"Don't," he scolded her gently as he held her arms at her side. "You're beautiful, ever inch of you."

"I know I look different than the last time we did this," she frowned as she tried to fight her arms free to cover herself again.

"Blair, you are beautiful," he told her as he angled her chin so he could look into her eyes. "That will never change to me. You are as beautiful to me today as you were that first night in the limo."

"I love you so much," she told him as tears glistened in her eyes.

"I love you more," he told her as he released her arms upon being satisfied that he'd made his point. Her arms immediately wrapped around his neck as she drew him closer to her. As she gained more confidence, he began removing what was left of his clothing as he gradually lowered her to the soft mattress.

"Are we finally going to do this?" she looked deep into his eyes as he lay next to her, both of them on their sides facing each other as he awaited her cue to proceed.

"If you think your heart is going to hold out," he told her as he began tracing her scar once again. "Do we have to exercise the safe word?"

Blair's lips clamped together tightly.

He took that as his cue as he rolled her underneath him and proceeded to make love to her. He was slow and patient, pausing in the moments he thought she needed to catch her breath. There were many thanks to the heavens as they found their bliss together.

"I love you, Blair," he told her as they curled together as they basked in the afterglow just as she drifted off to sleep. She barely managed to mutter, "Love you too."


	29. Chapter 29

Okay, so here's another chapter. I hope it's enjoyable. A little C&B time along with some NJBC time and advice from a concerned and somewhat clueless mother. Enjoy! Reply! Give Raina a ticket back to the Windy City! Death to Dair as anything other than friends!

-c-b-c-b-c-b-

Chuck's eyes opened late that night. He could feel Blair next to him and smiled at the feeling of her bare skin against his. The images and feelings of their interlude began replaying in his mind. Looking over at her he was suddenly panic stricken. The room was so quiet, almost too quiet. He sat up slowly and then leaned down and pressed his ear to Blair's heart.

"I'm not dead, Bass," Blair's sleepy voice scolded him. "We're okay."

"I couldn't help myself," he admitted sheepishly as he let his head fall against her breasts as the relief washed over him. "I put you through a pretty good workout. You cannot blame me for being a little nervous."

Blair ran her fingers through his hair, tugging lightly at the strands, "I'm not broken. I got a little cracked, but I've been glued back together."

"I've never thought for a moment that you were broken or cracked," he told her, "A little dented maybe."

She chuckled softly at his reply.

"So, besides wanting to make sure you didn't have to call 9-1-1, why else are you awake?"

"I'm a little hungry," he admitted, "I felt my stomach starting to rumble. It is well after midnight, and I don't recall us actually eating dinner."

"The rest of the spinach pie should still be good. I also made dessert."

"What did you make for dessert?" he inquired. While she was becoming an excellent cook, it was her desserts that he craved most. He'd gladly forgo the main course and head straight for dessert.

"I made Apple Cake," Blair smiled.

"Not cherry," he smirked devilishly.

"Not this time, sorry," Blair shook her head. His mind was truly always in the gutter. "I gave that to you a long time ago, remember?"

"I remember," he nodded quickly as he rose from the bed. "I'll be right back."

"Don't forget a knife and forks," Blair called out to him.

Chuck came back moments later with just the cake and two forks.

"You forgot the knife," she chided him.

"We'll be okay without it," Chuck assured her. "Besides this is just for us. No one else gets a bite."

She quickly pried some of the dessert apart with her fork and held it to his lips.

"This is much more seductive in bed than when you try to feed Sebastian and Sabrina that overly processed, mashed up baby food," he told her before he took her offering.

"I would hope so," Blair said as she adjusted the sheet around her. "So, how are you feeling?"

"What do you mean?"

"Anything you'd want to change about tonight?"

"I wish it hadn't been so long since the last time," Chuck told her honestly. "Because I really missed you."

"What I meant is, was it okay for you? Did it live up to the anticipation?"

"Always," Chuck smiled.

"Good," she breathed a sigh of relief.

"You couldn't possibly think I'd be disappointed," he frowned.

"It's been a while," Blair fiddled with her fork. "And my body has changed because of the twins."

"You've never been a disappointment," Chuck said. "I was there for your first time, remember?"

"But it must have felt different," she stated, "Foreign perhaps."

"Nothing about you is foreign to me," he told her as he caressed her cheek softly. "Yes, it felt a little different, but still familiar and still the best I've ever had."

Blair smiled as she leaned down and kissed him.

"Hmm," Chuck smiled. "Not a chance, Waldorf. We're not pushing it."

"What is that supposed to mean?" she asked innocently.

"You know exactly what that is supposed to mean."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," she told him with a slight twinkle in her eyes.

"Yes, you do," Chuck said as he fed her a bite of cake. "And I am not pressing our luck. I want you alive in the morning."

"You're no fun," she pouted before she accepted the cake.

"Oh, I disagree. I think I'm a lot of fun. And you think so too when I let you have your way."

"I think you should let me have my way right now," she told him with the cake still in her mouth.

"We'll work up to it," he told her, "We have to rebuild our stamina."

"You sure," she asked.

"Yes," Chuck nodded. "I'm taking no chances. Besides, I kind of like this. I think this is what being with you while you were pregnant would've been like."

"Eating in bed?"

"And fending you off," he chuckled.

"Oh, but you wouldn't have been fending me off. You would've been catering to every whim of your pregnant girlfriend."

"I'm sure I would have enjoyed all the benefits that your raging hormones produced," he smirked playfully.

Blair giggled and returned the favor of being fed by feeding Chuck, "So, I meant to ask, what did you think of the brownstone? I know you and Nate checked it out the other day."

"It needs a lot of work to bring it up to our lofty standards, but by combining both of our talents, my remodeling, your redecorating, I think it will feel like home in no time."

"And you're sure about not living in one of the penthouses at the hotel?"

"I'm sure. The vast backyard has to be the biggest selling point. Children deserve a place where they can stretch their legs and still feel safe. I want to build playhouses for both Sabrina and Sebastian in those majestic trees."

"You mean have someone else build those playhouses," she corrected him.

"Well, yeah," Chuck nodded with a smile. "But living in a hotel doesn't give a kid a feeling of permanency. I want that for our children."

"You have to stop that," Blair sighed.

"Stop what?"

"Stop talking like that. You're making it really hard not to jump on you."

"What exactly am I saying that is driving you so mad with desire?" he chuckled. "I'm merely being honest with you."

"But the way you're talking about the future," she told him, "It's as if you see us together forever."

"I do," Chuck smiled. "I always have. You need to know that."

"There was a time in the not too distant past when I didn't see that," she admitted.

"But that's behind us now," he reminded her as he felt her hand wander to his hip, tracing along the scar on his leg.

"Don't ever get shot again," she requested.

"Back at you," Chuck returned.

"Are we ever going to have the discussion?" she inquired as she traced circles around his healed wound.

"Yes," he nodded as he ran his hand along her scar with the same tenderness.

"But not today," she concluded.

"No," he confirmed.

"Okay," Blair said. "You're right. It wouldn't be a good end to an amazing night."

"That's not necessary true," he told her cryptically, "But tonight isn't the night I have planned for that discussion."

She nodded as she leaned in to kiss him.

"We should get into our pajamas," she responded as she pulled away slightly.

"Why?"

"Because if we don't, I am going to attack you."

-c-c-c-c-c-

"Hello," a voice dragged Blair from her peaceful slumber.

"Who the hell is that?" Chuck mumbled, burying his face in Blair's hair in an attempt to block it out.

"I'm not sure but I think it's-"

"B, where are you?"

"Serena," Chuck sighed.

"And where Serena goes," Blair started.

"Chuck, you here?"

"Nate is sure to follow," Chuck grumbled. "I locked the elevator down. How did those two get in?"

"Nate still has his pass key."

"Remind me to pick his pockets," Chuck grumbled.

_Knock-knock_

"Go away," Chuck demanded.

"Well, at least we know they're alive in there," the duo heard Nate say. "You two coming out?"

"Please tell me you locked the door," Blair requested as she looked to the knob in panic. Surely Nate wasn't dimwitted enough to open the door.

"We were alone in the penthouse. Why would I?"

"So that our two very nosy best friends couldn't barge in on us," Blair whispered before sighing. "We'll be out in a minute, guys."

"No," Chuck whined softly.

"Okay, I'll start coffee," Serena said cheerfully.

"Serena, stay away from the coffee maker," Blair grabbed her robe and scurried out of the bedroom. Chuck was groaning in disappointment as he watched her flee.

"You nearly set your mom's kitchen on fire the last time you tried to make coffee," Blair stated in panic as she entered the kitchen as Serena was eyeing the appliance.

"You worry entirely too much," Serena told Blair as she was shoved away from the coffee maker. "The coffee was good. I merely forgot to shut it off when the carafe was empty."

"Lily had to have the kitchen repainted," Blair reminded her friend. "And you had to buy her a new coffee maker."

"She was just using the smoke as an excuse to redecorate," Serena waved her off, "She'll use anything she can to remodel."

"There were flames," Nate added.

"I put them out," Serena pouted.

"With the very expensive soy milk that Eric has to drink because regular milk gives him hives," Blair reminded her.

"The fire went out before the smoke alarm went off. You two are making way too much of that one incident."

"We value our lives, S," Blair stated as she started the coffee.

"Morning everyone," Chuck entered.

"Now you come in. Where were you when I, your sister, needed defending?"

"Serena, you should know by now I'll be on whichever side Blair is on," Chuck stated as he stepped in behind Blair and wrapped his arms around her waist as he began nuzzling her neck.

"Coffee," Blair asked with a grin.

"I'd prefer something a little sweeter," he whispered into her ear as he bit her lobe gently.

"You have company," Nate reminded them.

"Uninvited company," Chuck growled as he continued to nibble on Blair's neck. "If this bothers you, you know the way to the elevator."

"Seriously, Chuck, this is bordering on inappropriate," Serena groaned as Chuck's hand disappeared under Blair's robe as he caressed her abdomen softly. A tiny gasp of delight left Blair's lips.

"Leave," Chuck growled.

"We can't kick them out," Blair said.

"Why can't we kick them out?" Chuck groaned. "I can have security up here to escort these trespassers out in the blink of an eye."

"Okay, first of all, Nate still has his pass key, so he can't be charged with trespassing," Blair said as she leaned her head back against Chuck's shoulder. "And they're family. If we toss them in jail, Lily will never forgive you."

"I'd be willing to risk it if I can entice you back to bed," he smiled as he felt her melting against him.

"I-"

"Hello?"

"Hate your mother," Blair finished with a groan.

"Good morning, everyone," Lily stated cheerfully as she carried both children into the kitchen. "These two just could not stay away any longer."

"There's my little girl," Chuck smiled as he picked up Sabrina as Blair reached for Sebastian.

"Thank you for watching them, Lily," Blair replied as she kissed Sebastian's forehead. "I hope they weren't too much trouble."

"They were angels," Lily smiled, "They slept through the entire night."

"I hope Eric pitched in since I couldn't be there," Serena said as she played with Serena over Chuck's shoulder. "Hi Sweetie."

"Back off van der Woodsen," Chuck said. "This is a daughter/daddy bonding moment. I missed her."

"I'm sure you and Blair were just bored out of your minds without them. Whatever did you two do to entertain yourselves?" Serena smirked.

"I'm going to lay Sebastian down," Blair announced as she attempted to change the subject. "I'll be right back."

"I'll come with you," Serena chimed in as she snatched Sabrina from Chuck's arms.

"I'm calling security," Chuck growled, "Kidnapping is a federal offense."

"Oh shush," Serena smirked. "You'll have her and her mother and her brother all to yourself soon enough. Let me enjoy some aunt/niece time."

"Serena, you need to have a kid or two," Blair said.

Chuck looked at Nate and began laughing as the best friends left the room. Nate's eyes showed sheer panic at Blair's suggestion.

"Not anytime soon, of course," Lily amended. "Not everyone is ready for parenthood at this time in their lives."

"Could I interest you in a cup of coffee, Lily?" Chuck inquired as he kissed his mother's cheek in greeting.

"That sounds lovely," Lily said as she took a seat. "So what did you two do last night? Blair was vague about your plans? I think she mentioned something about dinner and perhaps a movie."

"There might have been dinner," Nate chimed in, "But the only other entertainment was in the bedroom."

"What?" Lily asked.

"Nate," Chuck warned.

"C'mon, it's not like it's a secret."

"She's my mother."

"Oh, I see," Lily's eyes went wide as she put together Nate's cryptic message.

Blair and Serena had the unfortunate timing of walking into the room at that moment.

"What's wrong?" Blair asked when she saw Lily's face.

"Your ex-boyfriend has a big mouth," Chuck growled.

"Blair, I think you, Chuck, and I should have a discussion."

"About?"

"What you two did last night."

"Nate," Blair snarled.

"I'm not naïve enough to think that the four of you aren't sexually active, but I do hope that you're being responsible."

"Mom!" Serena exclaimed in mortification.

"Lily? Two children," Blair reminded her. "I think we're a little past the safe sex thing."

"Still," Lily stopped Blair from continuing, "I suppose you two do realize the consequences of unprotected sex, but you are still capable of reproducing. Children have their way of creeping up on you when they are least expected, like Serena."

"Hey!" Serena exclaimed in surprise.

"All I'm saying is that you two still need to take the necessary precautions.

"We did, I promise," Blair said.

"Was I a surprise?" Serena talked over everyone.

"Let's just say that you weren't exactly planned for the moment you were conceived," Lily admitted.

"Wait, why is this coming up now?" Serena replied.

Blair, Nate and Chuck bit their lips to keep from laughing.

"Serena, Dear, you have been one hundred percent loved. Does it matter if you were planned for?" Lily tried to assure her.

"I think we need to get dressed," Blair said to Chuck. "And Nate, you need to go."

"Blair's right," Chuck nodded, "This is a conversation between mother and daughter."

"Mom, why aren't you saying anything?" Serena demanded.

"Sweetheart, I want you to keep in mind that Rhodes women are very fertile," Lily started.

"Oh God," Nate said. "I have to go." He dashed from the room faster than anyone had ever seen him move.

"Stock up, Archibald," Chuck called out to him as he heard the elevator arrive.

"Chuck," Blair and Serena said at the same time and smacked him on opposite shoulders.

"I'm just trying to ensure that Nathaniel is properly equipped," Chuck shrugged.

"Bathroom," Blair pointed. "You need to shower and to get ready for work."

"Could I talk you into joining me?" he grinned seductively.

"Mother in the room!" Lily exclaimed, "And don't forget you're taking Eric out tonight. He was anxiously talking about it last evening as we bathed the children."

"I haven't forgotten," Chuck assured his mother with a laugh, "I'm very much looking forward to the chicken marsala."

"What is it with you and chicken marsala?" Lily shook her head, "If I didn't know better I'd swear it was code for something else."

Serena burst out laughing at how clueless her mother really was at the moment.

"Lily, let's have lunch sometime soon," Blair guided her best friend's mother to the elevator.

"Alright, Dear," Lily said. "Call me and we'll set something up."

"I will," Blair promised. Then once the elevator doors shut she rounded on her family. "You two are so completely unbalanced."

"Me? He's the one taking my little brother to a strip club."

"You're the one laughing about it. Your mother is going to call child services if we're not careful."

"What can they do? Eric is a legal adult," Serena replied.

"But Sabrina and Sebastian are not," Chuck reminded her.

"Mom's not going to take your kids away."

"Chuck, shower," Blair instructed him, "Serena, help me get the twins fed."

"I'd be happy to," Serena said.

"I won't be long," Chuck said. "I'll be back to help you."

"So, spill," Serena demanded once they were alone and the twins were in their highchairs.

"About what?" Blair asked.

"You know about what," Serena smiled. "How was it?"

"How was what?" Blair tried to play innocent.

"Blair!"

"Amazing," Blair smiled.

"Come on, you have to give me more than that," Serena demanded.

"You have a boyfriend of your own. You know how sex works," Blair replied.

"I've never slept with Chuck, but we've both slept with Nate and you know that he's not on Chuck's level."

"Point taken," Blair smiled. "Chuck was unbelievable."

"And," Serena prompted her.

"So soft and gentle," she added.

"Really," Serena responded in disbelief.

"He's not always as aggressive as he seems," Blair replied.

"But still soft and gentle," Serena responded, "That doesn't exactly fit the Chuck Bass mold that I was expecting. Was that satisfying?"

"You have no idea," Blair sighed happily.

Neither women had any way to know that Chuck was on the other side of the wall listening to every word and smiling at Blair's revelation. While he wasn't lacking for confidence when it came to sex, it was good to know that she enjoyed it as much as he did.

=d=d=d=d=d=

"Archibald, should I invest heavily in condom manufacturers?" Chuck laughed when his best friend appeared in his office later that day.

"Lily was just kidding, wasn't she?" Nate gulped nervously.

"Humphrey's old man knocked her up when they were teenagers," Chuck reminded him.

"Oh dear God," Nate groaned.

"You two are always protected, aren't you?" Chuck studied his best friend closely.

"Of course," Nate nodded. "Mom would've been thrilled if I'd knocked Blair up. Serena, not so much."

"What's Anne's problem?"

"I don't know. She thinks Serena's too flighty, and that I need someone more stable."

"She just needs more time to get to know Serena," Chuck tried to reassure him. "It takes a little time for her charm to rub off on people."

"I don't know, Man," Nate shook his head, "She still talks an awful lot about Blair."

"Remind Anne that Blair is taken and that she had children that were not Archibald/Vanderbilts'. They're Waldorf/Bass'."

"I'm not so sure that would be a deterrent," Nate sighed.

"Okay, then tell your grandfather. He'll set Anne straight."

"I'm not sure that would work either," Nate groaned.

"Nathaniel, you need to be firm with your mother and your grandfather. Take a stand or they'll be controlling you for the rest of your life."

"At least Dad's on your side," Nate smiled. "He thinks you and Blair are great together. He wants to know when the wedding is."

"I still have to ask her, and she still has to say yes," Chuck stated nervously.

"You can't be worried that she'll say no," Nate rolled his eyes, "You have children together for crying out loud. You live together. You're going into business together. No isn't going to be an option."

"I'm still afraid that she sees Jenny when she looks at me."

"If that were true, last night wouldn't have happened."

"Maybe not," he conceded, "I'm still afraid that I see Jenny when I look at myself."

"Monogamy isn't for everyone, but it's for you and Blair," Nate tried to reassure him.

"I want her every day. I wake up, and I still can't believe she's there. I almost lost her to a damn psycho with a gun."

"She almost lost you the same way."

"When I touch her scar, I feel a tiny piece of myself breaking," Chuck admitted, "Somebody hurt her...physically hurt her. It takes every ounce of strength I have not to call in as many favors as it takes to end that miserable man's existence."

"You think she doesn't feel the same way? You could've died in Prague and no one would've known what happened to you. Blair could be scouring Europe looking for a dead man. At least you have a face to go with the crime. We don't have that for your assailant."

"It's not the same," Chuck shook his head. "I deserved that bullet wound. Blair didn't."

"That's crap and you know it," Blair said from the door. "Hey Nate. Serena's out in the hall with your godchildren. Why don't you go say hi?"

"Blair," Chuck began as Nate scrambled out of the room making sure to close the door behind him. He knew better than to stay in the line of fire.

"You didn't deserve a bullet wound," Blair said as she crossed the office. "You screwed up, so did I. But you didn't deserve to be shot."

"I deserved the pain associated with it," he shook his head. "I'd rather it have been in the heart, though. It could have spared you so much pain."

Blair slapped him across the face. "Don't you ever say that again!"

Chuck's eyes went wide.

"Ow, that hurt," Chuck said, rubbing his face.

"Good," Blair hissed. "If you ever say something that stupid again, I will make you sleep in the lobby of our new hotel without the heat on for a week."

"You hit me," he responded, his voice still stunned.

"Yes, I did," Blair responded, her eyes widening as what she did sunk in. "Oh God. Chuck, I'm sorry."

"You hit me," he repeated, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "I can't believe you did that."

"Are you okay?" she asked as her hand went to his cheek to caress him softly where she'd so rudely inflicted pain.

"Yes, I'm fine," Chuck assured her. "But that was kind of hot."

"You're incorrigible."

"Could you do it again?" he teased as he wrapped his arms around her waist and brought her in closer.

"You get turned on by the strangest things, you know that," Blair smiled.

"I am merely turned on by all the things you are capable of doing," he amended.

"Seriously though, please never say anything even hinting that you deserved to be shot. You didn't, no matter what you did."

He nodded in agreement. "To what do I owe the honor of your presence?"

"I came to thank you in person for last night and for the flowers you sent this morning," she smiled.

"No need to thank me for last night," he told her. "I assure you I enjoyed it as much, if not more than, you did."

"Not possible," she shook her head. "And I'm here hoping to convince you of a repeat performance. Serena has volunteered her and Nate to watch the children, if you're interested."

"Tonight?"

"No. You're seeing Eric tonight," Blair smiled.

"Tomorrow?"

"Yes. I even bought a bottle of champagne."

"Will you be partaking?" he inquired.

"A small glass," Blair nodded. "And I ordered dinner."

"And for dessert?" he inquired.

"Me," she smiled.

"My favorite," Chuck smirked.

"Is that all you came here for?"

"No," she shook her head, "But Serena, Nate and the children are right outside, and your office walls are painfully thin."

"And neither of us are any good at being quiet," Chuck smiled.

"Exactly. By the way, your secretary?"

"Lesbian," Chuck smiled.

"Smart man," she tapped his chest affectionately.

"How about lunch?" Chuck suggested when she pulled away as if she was about to leave. He couldn't bare the thought. "My treat. We'll even take Serena and Nate along."

"Sounds good," Blair nodded. "I am kind of hungry. I skipped dinner last night for some reason."

"For a very good reason," he laughed.


	30. Chapter 30

Four hours and 40 minutes until a brand new Gossip Girl. I'll be hiding my eyes. What about you guys? ;) Thanks for the replies and thank you to my Beta.

Blair put Sabrina in the carrier and let it sit on the floor in the yet to be furnished master bedroom while she inspects the balcony of their still in heavy renovations Brownstone. Chuck found her a moment later and joined her after putting Sebastian down next to his sister. Chuck came behind Blair and wraps her up in his arms.

"So," Chuck whispered, "What are you thinking about?"

"How much this place already feels like home," she sighed as she ran her fingers along his forearms, smiling that he'd rolled up his sleeves so she could feel bare skin, the skin she craved night and day. "I can already see our children running around giving us headaches, doing their homework at the dining room table, pushing and shoving each other, falling and scraping their knees, running to us in tears. I love that feeling."

"You love that our children will be in tears?" Chuck frowned in confusion.

"No," she shook her head quickly. "I love that they will be running to us to wipe those tears away, both of us."

"I saw your eyes lighting up in the kitchen. How big a stove are you planning on?" he grinned.

"As big as they come," she smiled. "I want the children to come home from school each evening to the smells wafting from it, and then we'll all sit down to extravagant meals together as real families should. We'll be like the stereotypical 50's family with better fashion sense"

"I like that image," Chuck laughed softly. "What do you think of the basement apartment?"

"I think if we play it right, we can get Cyrus to agree to live in it."

"We need to find a good time to broach the subject," he reminded her. She was so keen on the idea, but too nervous to actually mention it to Cyrus as of yet though she was slowly planting the seeds when she talked to him which was becoming a much more regular event.

"Yeah, I know," Blair nodded. "What did you think of the small room off the dining room? Big enough for a home office?"

"That should work. Plenty of space for a desk that I can make love to you on," he nodded. She rolled her eyes as she smacked him softly. "Have you given any thoughts to our bedroom decor?"

"Navy blue walls," Blair smiled with a nod. "And a king size bed right in the middle. That's as far as I've gotten."

"I'm with you so far," Chuck nodded. "We should replace the balcony door. I'm not crazy about the sliding glass. I've heard too many stories from my employees about their kids slamming their feet and hands in the door. I'd like to avoid those tears for a little while."

"Something with a good lock on it," Blair nodded.

"To keep the children safe or out?" he chuckled.

"Both," Blair nodded. "Until they get older and know better, I don't want to take any chances."

"I'm thinking an oversized bathtub in the bathroom," Chuck suggested.

"Room enough for two?" she inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh yes," Chuck nodded.

"Well, we'll also need a nice sized shower."

"Why confine ourselves merely to the bath?" he chuckled, "I like how you think, Waldorf."

"Have I mentioned how wonderful it has been reconnecting with you in the bedroom?" she inquired as his arms wrapped around her a little tighter.

"Many times," Chuck nuzzled her neck before pressing a kiss to the curve of it. "Once everything's in place, we'll have to christen our home."

"Every last room," Blair smiled.

"As much as I love our sex life, I also love that our relationship isn't based strictly on sex," he told her sincerely. "We've been making up for lost time lately, but I love that we still get to have these moments where sex doesn't get in the way, and we get to enjoy being with each other."

"Do you know how sexy you are when you talk like that?" Blair smiled.

"You have a one track mind these days," he chuckled as she suddenly turned in his arms and was placing feather light kisses along his neck.

"I haven't heard any complaining," she smirked as she sucked lightly at his Adam's apple.

"There is no bed in this house and our children are less than five feet away," Chuck reminded her. "There are limits to a man's control, and you are severely testing them."

"Spoilsport," she pouted.

Chuck cupped her face in his hands and looked her deep in the eyes. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Blair told him. "Did I tell you I got an offer on the café?"

"A viable offer that we can accept and finally be rid of that place?" he inquired.

"I don't like it when you put it that way," she scolded him.

"I know, and I'm sorry," he told her, "But I can't help how I feel about that place anymore than you can control how you feel about the Empire."

"It's a respectable offer," Blair replied.

"And?"

"I called the lawyers yesterday. They're drawing up the papers," Blair admitted.

"You okay?"

"I need to go back and pack up the apartment. There are still a few things there that I want."

"We can go this weekend," he suggested, "And it will allow you to have a proper goodbye."

Blair wrapped her arms around his neck, "Thank you for saying 'we'."

He pressed a soft kiss to her lips before the sounds of their children interrupted them.

"I think Sabrina and Sebastian are bored," Blair frowned.

"We should get going anyway," Chuck checked his watch. "We're having lunch with Eric and Elliot."

"This really is going to be the most magnificent view," Blair responded as she nodded in response to his suggestion, "I cannot imagine a better view than to be able to see the children playing below and still have the New York skyline at sunrise."

"I think a sandbox should be our first backyard addition," Chuck suggested.

"I like that idea. It reminds me of how you and I met."

"Do you know it took my nanny three hours to get all the sand off of me that night?" Chuck asked her.

"I said I was sorry."

"She was not happy," Chuck added.

"Again, I said I was sorry," she laughed.

"Well, I did sort of deserve it," Chuck admitted. "It wasn't nice of me to throw a frog at you."

"You aren't kidding," Blair laughed, "The frog was all slimy. You're just lucky it was sand down your pants and not another foul gesture."

"Boys always throw frogs at girls they like," Chuck smirked.

"You need to teach Sebastian a different trick," Blair advised him, "Girls aren't into slimy frogs like little boys are."

"I won't be teaching him any tricks," Chuck shook his head. "Little boys shouldn't know such things."

Blair giggled, "He's not allowed in the back of a limo with girls either."

"That goes without saying," Chuck laughed, "And Sabrina will be nowhere near them either unless she is accompanied by a pre-approved adult chaperone."

"Daddy's little girl," Blair smiled with a shake of her head. "Do I have to remind you that I was also a daddy's girl? I succumbed to you."

"Not to defame the great Harold Waldorf, but I don't think he was up to matching wits with the hormonal Chuck Bass. I assure you, I will be up to the challenge."

"What can I say?" Blair smirked. "I was just too overwhelmed by you to refuse."

"Really?" he chuckled, "Perhaps I can overwhelm you a little later,"

"Maybe," Blair teased.

"We really shouldn't keep Eric and Elliot waiting," Chuck stated as he turned towards the children and pulled Blair with him.

"Wait. All kidding aside, that night in the limo was probably the best decision of my life."

"I can say without a doubt it was mine," Chuck agreed.

"Good," Blair smiled. "You know, if Cyrus says no, we can always offer the apartment to Eric. He told me the other night he's decided on Columbia."

"Let's talk to Cyrus first," Chuck responded even though he was thrilled at the prospect of Eric staying around. "Eric deserves to have the whole college experience, and that includes dorm living."

"Ugh," Blair groaned.

"Not everyone has an experience as horrible as yours," he reminded her.

"You know, it was the oddest thing, but I think I saw Georgina the other day," Blair said as the two of them walked down the stairs.

"Where?"

"Dan asked me to get something out of the loft and while I was there, I saw someone who looked like Georgina across the street."

Chuck immediately pulled out his phone to give his PI a call.

"What are you doing?" Blair inquired.

"Finding out if Georgina has returned and if she has, what she's up to."

"Chuck, her parents live here," Blair reminded him.

"Yes, they live here," Chuck said motioning around them. "They do not live in Brooklyn. And family has never been a reason for her before, it certainly won't be now."

"You're being paranoid," she informed him.

"It's Sparks," Chuck reminded her.

"Point taken," Blair nodded as they loaded the twins into the car. Blair slid in and Chuck followed. "You know, I still want to scratch her eyes and Vanessa's eyes out of their skulls."

"For?"

"Georgina for lying and Vanessa for leaving," Blair shook her head. "Humphrey didn't deserve that."

"No, he didn't," Chuck conceded. While he didn't have Blair's same level of fondness for the boy from Brooklyn, he didn't feel his lack of real estate fortune should make him everyone's punching bag.

"And Jonathan? How's he going to feel when he grows up and realizes that his mother voluntarily left him?" Blair was starting to look pissed.

"Maybe Vanessa will realize her mistake and come back," Chuck offered as he tried to calm her down. She always went into children protective mode when this topic came up.

"Lily didn't tell you," Blair asked. "Vanessa signed away her parental rights."

"So even if she wanted to come back," Chuck started.

"She has no legal right to ask Humphrey for a place in Jonathan's life."

"But he'd still give her a chance, wouldn't he?" Chuck inquired. He couldn't image anyone being so cruel as to deny a parent their right to see their child.

"I don't know," she shrugged.

"Allison left him," Chuck reminded her.

"And maybe that will be the reason why he will always let Vanessa come around," Blair concluded.

"If we were in a similar situation, would you allow me the right to see these two?" he hypothesized.

"I think I would because I know what it's like not to have a dad around and so do you," Blair smiled. "Bart might have been there, but he was never really there. I know that you would be the best possible father you could be for that reason alone. "But I don't foresee a scenario in which you would have signed away your parental rights."

"I don't get Vanessa," Chuck shook his head. "She grew up a lot more grounded than you and I, but we're the ones being day-to-day parents. She's the one running out on her child."

"It does seem strange," Blair nodded. "But I'm not going to try to get into her state of mind. I'm focus more on mine and being a good parent to our two angels."

"Sounds good to me," Chuck smiled. "You know, I wonder if Sparks' kid will end up in the same class as our two."

"Probably. They're only about five months apart - Oh my God. What if she lied?"

"Lied about what?"

"Georgina took Milo away from Dan, telling him that the real father was some Russian. What if she lied? What if Dan really is the father, and she was just sick of living in Brooklyn?"

"That would make Jonathan and Milo brothers," Chuck responded, "And open up an entirely new can of worms. This would be hard for Dan."

"I agree," Blair nodded, "Losing Milo hurt him a lot in the beginning. Then he lost Jenny and then Vanessa. Jonathan is the reason he's kept it all together."

"But he wouldn't be losing Jonathan, just getting Milo back," Chuck pointed out.

"Milo and Georgina," Blair reminded him.

Chuck winced at the addition she made.

"Georgina coming back into the fold is never a good thing."

"Being a parent changes you," Blair said. "And Dan said that it seemed to change her."

"Humphrey's not exactly the brightest guy when it comes to women. For example: Serena, Vanessa, and Ms. Carr," Chuck said. "And I'm not so sure anything could change the spawn of Satan."

"Well, we'll see," Blair said.

-x-x-x-

Blair sat down on the couch and opened the book she'd been reading.

"Hey," Chuck said as he walked off the elevator. "Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?'

"What?"

"My boxers, Nate's old Johnny Cash T-shirt, warm socks, and your hair back in a ponytail. Also you're not wearing any make-up."

"This is what relaxing looks like," Blair said.

"I'm just used to you dressed to the nines," he told her as he leaned in to greet her with a kiss. "What are you reading?"

"Columbia course catalog," she replied. "I'm helping Eric decide which courses he should enroll in."

"No plans to go back yourself," Chuck asked as he sat down next to her.

"Not at the moment. Right now I want to be there for the children as they grow up, and you as we embark on our new business venture. I hired Dan for the café today."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" he inquired, "He nearly bankrupted you with his mathematic ineptitude."

"He goes nowhere near the books. How was your day?" Blair inquired as she set her book aside.

"Nothing too earth shattering. I'm still rich," Chuck replied as he began pecking at her neck. "Did you and the children have a good day?"

"Yes," Blair nodded. "We went for a walk and we stopped for coffee. I wouldn't let them have any because it'll stunt their growth. They complained about that."

"Did they?"

"Yes, Sebastian especially," Blair rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "But I held firm."

"You caved, didn't you," Chuck replied.

"No," Blair shook her head vigorously. "Then we headed down to that bakery Lily likes so much and got scones before I picked up the makings for macaroni and cheese so I could make it for Eric since he agreed to baby-sit on Saturday when we go to clean out the apartment."

"I swung by the brownstone on the way home," Chuck told her. "The renovations are going better than expected. We may be able to move in by the end of the month. That is if you think you can work your designing magic in just a few weeks."

"With you bankrolling everything, I can probably have it done in only one. It will be my very own design challenge."

"Sounds fun," Chuck said.

Blair turned and then climbed into his lap, "I found a bed. It is perfect. I ordered it. It'll be delivered to that warehouse you own for storage next week."

"We could sneak away one evening after it's delivered and put it through a good workout," he told her.

Blair smiled, "My thoughts exactly. But I have some more news."

"Okay."

"Wanna go to Paris?"

"Does that mean you've been cleared for lift off?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Yes," Blair nodded.

"And Cyrus?"

"Is expecting us for dinner on Monday," Blair admitted. "I figured it was better to make our proposition in person instead of over the phone. I'm much harder to reject in person."

"I'm familiar," he smirked.

"Plus then he can see how much I want him to return to New York. I miss him so much."

"I know you do," Chuck nodded.

"So, is this okay? If you need to work, the kids and I can go by ourselves."

"No," Chuck shook his head. "I want to make a better Paris memory for us. Plus I'm not going to miss a change to reinitiate you to the mile high club."

"You have had a one track mind lately," she shook her head. They were spending most of their alone time together in bed. Either were complaining, merely teasing.

"You're not any better," he chuckled as he began to peck away again. "It's the sexy boxers that have done me in. I cannot resist."

"Here on the couch," Blair feigned shock. "Why Mr. Bass, I'm surprised at your lack of propriety."

"That's a pretty big word," he laughed as he tugged lightly at the bottom on the t-shirt. "Are you aware that Archibald is looking for this? He accused me of stealing it."

"You did steal it. I found it in one of your drawers," she told him.

"Merely to halt him from ever wearing it again. This shirt is awful."

"Even on me?" she pouted.

"Except on you," he amended. "On you, it's incredibly sexy."

"It's comfortable. So are the socks," Blair wiggled her feet. "They were Serena's. I swiped them from her room before I left New York."

"You're quite the thief."

"So are you," Blair smiled. "You stole my heart a long time ago."

"That's a good line," he groaned as his hands slid under the worn cotton fabric, "One of mine?"

"Did I steal your heart?"

"The moment you looked over your shoulder on stage," Chuck nodded his hands moving further up. "Or perhaps in that sandbox. I'll never be too sure."

"Whenever it was, it doesn't matter," Blair shook her head. "What matters is the here and now and the fact that your hands feel really good on my back."

"Would you like a massage?" he offered as his fingertips trailed her spin gently. She shivered at his touch.

"I was kind of hoping for the full body type," Blair smiled.

"I can put that on the menu as well," he grinned.

"Here? Or in bed?"

"Let's move to the bed," he suggested as he easily picked her up in his arms. "It will give us more room, and you deserve a full body massage before I massage your body."

"That doesn't make any sense," she shook her head in confusion. "Are we having sex or not?"

"Eventually," he nodded as he crossed the threshold to their bedroom and lowered her to the bed. "Get yourself comfortable. I'm going to go check in on the children and then come back to ravish that sexy body of yours."

"Okay, but should I be naked when you get back," Blair teased.

"I like undressing you," Chuck smirked. "So, no, be dressed."

Blair rose up on her knees as he attempted to pull away. "I can put a few more layers on if you wish to raise the challenge level."

"I'm liable to tear anything you put on off," Chuck said. "And I like those boxers, so just stay dressed the way you are."

"I'll take your suggestion under advisement," she grinned as she trailed her fingers along his chest. "You'd better go before I entice you into this bed, and I know the children missed you today."

Once Chuck was out of the room, Blair scrambled towards her closet to find her sexiest piece of lingerie and put it on. She was going to give Bass a thrill.

"Somebody is fussy today," Chuck was cooing to Sabrina as he strolled back into their bedroom with Sabrina in his arms. When he tried to leave the room, she began to cry until he caved and picked he up. Now she wouldn't let him put her down and he didn't want to wake his soundly sleeping son.

His mouth fell open as he found Blair is a seductive pose.

She sat up when she saw Sabrina in her father's arms. "Oops. She won't remember this, right?"

"What? Her mom ready and waiting to be ravished by her dad? I doubt it."

"This must be what people meant when they said children can put a damper on a couple's sex life," Blair blushed as she slipped into her closet to find the matching satin robe.

"I guess so," Chuck sighed. "You knew this was going to happen, didn't you, Sabrina? Are you trying to torture Daddy before you become a teenager?"

"Just giving you a taste of what it'll be like when she finds a boy she likes."

"We are locking her in her room until she's thirty," Chuck informed her as he sat down at the end of the bed and began rocking Sabrina in hopes she'd fall asleep.

"Yeah, I think that's what my dad said about me and that worked so well."

"I swear, Blair, if she ever brings home a guy like me, I'll send her to a convent."

"I thought that Bass' weren't allowed in churches. Didn't you say that lightening would strike and set the place aflame?"

"Then I'll buy a castle in Europe and lock her in the tower."

"Chuck, you cannot keep her from growing up."

"I can certainly try," Chuck responded as he hugged his little girl close. "She will always be my little angel."

"Serena, Nate, you, and I grew up way too fast. We can give her what we didn't have. We can give her a childhood but we can't keep her a child forever. I can tell you that she will not be having sex at thirteen the way you were or on top of bars like Serena and Nate."

"Or in the back of limos the way you were," Chuck smirked.

"But she's still going to find a way to grove up, perhaps before you're ready."

"Are you this worried about Sebastian?"

"Yes, but for different reasons," Blair admitted. "I worry about him because when I look in his eyes, I see you staring back at me and that worries me because I was there for most of the bad things in your life."

"We can give him a different life," Chuck told him.

"We will give him a different life," Blair agreed and then looked over Chuck's shoulder, "She's asleep."

Chuck looked down at her, "She is. I'll put her back in her bed."

"You don't have to right away," Blair replied as she rubbed his shoulders. "I understand if you want to have a little daddy-daughter bonding time with her. I can wait to have my urges satisfied."

"Good to know," Chuck smiled. "I think I'll walk her a little in the living room to make sure she's asleep."

Blair nodded.

"Don't fall asleep," he told her as he left.

"I'll try," Blair smiled. She let herself fall back on the bed, her head landing on the pillows. He really was a good father.

She felt herself begin to drift off as the bed shifted underneath her. As she opened her eyes a sliver, she could see that Chuck was trying to get into bed quietly so as not to disturb her.

"I'm awake," she mumbled.

"Liar," he smiled.

"Everyone asleep?"

"I'm the only one awake."

"I'm awake," Blair tried to wake herself up.

"Blair, go back to sleep."

"I want to be with you," she said trying to open her eyes.

"You are with me," Chuck reminded her.

"You know what I mean."

"We can do this tomorrow night," he assured her.

"But I'm all dressed for it," she whined.

"I liked what you were wearing before just fine."

"But this is much sexier," she pouted.

"To which I am in full agreement," he assured her, "But I don't need sexy lingerie to get into the mood. I just need you."

"I love you so much," Blair smiled. "You always know just what to say."

"Are you waking up?" he inquired as he nipped at her shoulder softly.

"I'm wide awake," Blair nodded.

"Good," Chuck smiled. "Now, where were we?"

-c-c-c-c-c-c-

"It's remarkable what you did to this place with the limited funds you had available," Chuck marveled at the surroundings. "If it wasn't for the location and what happened downstairs, I think I could be comfortable living here. It makes me excited to see what you'll do with the brownstone given the unlimited funds you have available to you."

Blair laughed a little as she opened up the living room closet and pulled out the coats she had hanging in there before she was able to step further into the closet. "Hey Chuck, can you give me a hand? I can't get this box down."

Chuck did his manly duty and lowered the box on the top shelf down for her.

"Be careful," she exclaimed as he was a little rougher with the box than she would have liked. "That's fragile."

"What's in it?" Chuck asked as he set the box down on the couch.

"Our family ornaments," Blair said as she opened it up. "See? They have our names on it and that one has your name on it."

"You still included me," he responded in surprise, "With as angry as you were, I was still family to you?"

"You're always family to me," she told him as she turned to caress his chest softly.

"Thank you," he looked at the deep red colored ball.

"I had one for Bart and one for Evelyn made," Blair admitted quietly.

Chuck's eyes teared at the revelation.

"But this year will be the first time they'll be hung because I didn't have a chance to hang them up last year."

"What stopped you?" he inquired as he tried to reign in his emotions.

"My water broke," Blair told him.

It took Chuck a moment to realize what that actually meant. "You mean you went into labor as you were decorating the tree?"

"Christmas Eve I'm over by the window," Blair pointed to the window that faced the street. "I had just hung up my mom's and I'd reached back to grab yours when I felt a labor pain. Then my water broke."

"Does it always happen like that?" he inquired.

"I don't think so," she shook her head. "The doctor said that Sebastian and Sabrina were in a hurry to ensure they'd be born in time for Santa to visit. Serena barely made it in time."

"Was it painful?" he asked.

"Good lordy, yes," Blair nodded. "But it was worth it the moment I held them in my arms."

"I should have been there," he looked away, his disappointment evident.

"I'm sorry," she told him quickly, thinking that his disappointment was directed towards her. "I should have called you."

"That's not what I meant," he told her, "I shouldn't have let you get away. I should have followed you when you first walked away. I should have demanded forgiveness. I should have kept talking, kept apologizing until you took me back. Even when I saw you in Paris, if I'd called out to you, you would have stopped. I could have begged for your forgiveness so many times when I had the opportunity, but I didn't. I wasn't there for the most important day of my life. I missed our children coming into this world. I'm used to regret, but nothing will ever come close to this."

"It's not just your regret," Blair said. "I could've looked beyond what happened with Jenny and chalked it up to the grief-stricken, drunken mistake that it was. In Paris, I could've gone with Serena when she went to find you instead of getting on a plane. I didn't have to leave New York. I could've stayed and been pregnant here. I kept running in the opposite direction instead of standing still and just listening to you. My regret is that the day I found out I was having twins I didn't follow my first instinct and call you."

Chuck closed his eyes as the pain overwhelmed him. He hadn't wanted her to feel the regret he did. In his eyes, she'd done nothing wrong. He'd already forgiven her for everything in their absence, but he'd doubt he'd ever be able to forgive himself.

"Chuck, look at me," Blair demanded gently. "Let it go. It happened. I've moved on. You have to do the same. Punishing yourself is not going to change what has happened."

"Have you forgiven me?" he asked softly.

"Yes," Blair said. "And do you know why? Because at the end of the day, I want you there. Because at the end of the day, I can't imagine my life without you. But most of all, because at the end of the day, I've been in love with you since I was seventeen years old and I'm never going to stop."

"I love you too," he told her as he swept her into his arms and kissed her.

"I was never able to christen this apartment properly," she replied as she pulled away breathlessly. "How about we give this place a proper goodbye?"

Chuck lifted her into his arms and brought her back to the bedroom.


	31. Chapter 31

Here's Chapter 31 aka How I Wish Season 4 was going. Anyway, thank you to my beta and to all those who consistently reply. Love you guys.

=c=c=c=c=c=

The limo slowly came to a stop in front of Cyrus's building. Blair stepped out holding Sabrina and pointed off into the distance, "See that baby? That is the Eiffel Tower. They say it's the most romantic place in the world."

Chuck's heart ached as he realized they've never experienced the tower together and began plotting in his head how to rectify that with an afternoon to themselves. He quickly thought of asking Cyrus to help as he'd been willing to help her in the past.

Cyrus came out to greet them and exclaiming how big the twins were and how much healthier Blair looked. "You're glowing, my dear."

"I've missed you so much, Cyrus," Blair exclaims as she ran to hug Cyrus tightly, savoring the bear hug she received in return. He always gave the best hugs.

"Look at you," the older man said with a smile. "Motherhood definitely agrees with you."

"Thank you," Blair smiled as she bounced Sabrina. "Can you say hi to Grandpere Cyrus, Sabrina?"

Sabrina babbled her own version of hello to her grandfather as Cyrus kissed her chubby little cheeks.

"Charles," Cyrus greeted the younger man next to Blair with a hug that Chuck accepted without the slightest bit of discomfort.

"It's good to see you again Cyrus," Chuck said.

"And little Sebastian," Cyrus exclaimed with great enthusiasm. "Such a little heartbreaker you will be. You look so much like your father."

"That's what everyone says," Chuck said with an amused smile.

"Because it's true," Blair added.

"Come in, come in," Cyrus urged them. "We have so much to catch up on."

Blair smiled as she and Chuck carried their children into the house.

"I talked to Aaron before we left home," Blair said to Cyrus. "He sends his love and wants you to know that he'll be sending you a painting he did of the skyline from the top of his building."

"I cannot wait to see it," Cyrus proclaimed, "I have missed the views of New York City almost as much as the people living there."

Blair was about to make her offer, but Chuck shook his head to tell her it wasn't yet time. After dinner, as they had planned, was best.

"How was your flight?"

"Smooth," Blair nodded. "Chuck has a great pilot."

"And these two love the friendly skies," Chuck stated, "We were a little nervous about how they'd do in the high altitudes, but there was no fussing whatsoever. They clearly enjoy the perks the Bass name brings with it."

"And do they have the Bass name?"

"They do," Blair nodded. "It was my present to Chuck on his birthday."

"Speaking of presents, thank you for the present you sent," Chuck said. "I thoroughly enjoyed seeing the play as did Nate."

"You are very welcome," Cyrus smiled. "I was going to fly in for the celebration, but Blair told me there wasn't going to be one. I was most disappointed."

"It's a quirk I have," Chuck replied, "Birthdays to me are more of a reminder of what is missing in my life than a celebration of my life."

"I see," Cyrus nodded.

"One of many quirks," Chuck admitted.

Blair reached for Chuck's hand and squeezed, "I hope you'll be there for my birthday and the first birthday of the twins."

"I look forward to it."

Chuck brought Blair's hand to his lips for a soft kiss.

"These are just the most adorable cheeks in the world," Cyrus proclaimed as he took Sebastian into his arms and bounced him around. Sebastian laughed happily at the attention. "You must have Mommy and Daddy wrapped around your fingers."

"Well, Mommy anyway," Chuck said. "He's not going to get anything by me."

"No, that'll be Sabrina's territory."

"Unfortunately, she's right," Chuck conceded.

"I missed you so much," Cyrus stated as he hugged Sebastian close.

Blair could see he was nearly in tears. His eyes looked lonely.

"Chuck, can you take Sabrina for a moment? I want to get some water," Blair said as she handed over her daughter to her father.

Chuck willingly took Sabrina, kissing her forehead softly. "You okay?"

"Yes, my throat's just dry," Blair smiled. She didn't want Cyrus to see the tears she felt building by the memories that were flooding her mind by being in her mother's home. She could feel her mother everywhere.

"Are you sure that's all?" Chuck asked her gently. The worry was evident in his voice and eyes.

"Yes," Blair nodded as she went into the kitchen and found a glass before filling it. She sipped the water and then put it down. She suddenly realized that her hands were shaking. She looked around the kitchen.

"A few inches to the left," Cyrus said from the door.

Blair looked over to see both Cyrus and Chuck in the doorway.

"Where are the-"

"The maids took them to the nursery," Chuck stated as he stepped towards her.

"Oh," Blair smiled. "A few inches to the left, Cyrus? Are you sure? I thought I was standing pretty much in the same place."

"That's an afternoon I won't soon forget."

Chuck looked between the pair in confusion. "I don't understand."

"I was standing right about here when I told Mom and Cyrus I was pregnant," Blair explained and then pointed as she spoke. "Daddy and Roman were right about where you and Cyrus are and Mom and Cyrus were standing there."

Cyrus stepped forward and hugged her as the memories flooded back. The tears in her eyes spilled over.

"I miss her so much, Cyrus," Blair broke down in his arms.

"I do too," Cyrus agreed as he own tears fell.

"How'd Eleanor take it?" Chuck asked after a few moments when she'd regained her composure. "When I saw her all she wanted was for you to come home, but I can't imagine she was too thrilled in the beginning."

"She wasn't," Blair shook her head as she wiped away her tears. "Especially given that you were the father."

"I guess I wasn't her favorite person after everything," Chuck said quietly.

"But Blair held firm with her decision," Cyrus chimed in, "She made it clear that she was having the baby and raising it on her own. That was of course before she found out she was carrying twins. Though it was a surprise to us all, Eleanor and I were both proud of how strong she was being."

Blair smiled, scrunching her nose up a little, "And Cyrus helped me hire a PI to find you."

"Of course all he dug up was Jack," Cyrus shook his head. "Charles, if you ever want to take legal action against him for anything, let me know. I'd be happy to help."

"I may take you up on that some day if he ever decides to show his face again," Chuck replied.

"If he's smart, he'll stay away," Blair proclaimed.

"I'm sorry you had to tell Eleanor and Cyrus by yourself," Chuck told her as he looked at her sincerely.

"I wasn't totally alone," Blair admitted. "Daddy and Roman knew before Mom and Cyrus. They were there with me. So was Serena."

"Yes and when we all started shouting, Serena helped Blair get up on a stool so that Blair could do an imitation of Harold's mother."

"One day I would like to witness that," Chuck laughed, "If it's anything like Serena's imitation in the hospital, it must have been quite a show."

"It was one of her finest moments," Cyrus proclaimed as he wiped away the few fresh tears that had fallen down Blair's cheeks.

"Thank you," Blair smiled. "So, what are we having for dinner?"

-x-x-x-x-x-

"Cyrus, can Chuck and I talk to you for a moment before you turn in?"

"Absolutely, about anything," Cyrus replied.

Blair took Cyrus's arm and the two of them sat on the couch while Chuck took a seat in the available chair.

"We wanted to tell you the news," Blair said. "Chuck and I are moving out of The Empire."

"Are you taking the penthouse back?"

"No," Blair shook her head.

"We've purchased a brownstone," Chuck explained.

"That sounds wonderful," Cyrus pronounced, "What a wonderful way to raise your children."

"It's going to be quite lovely," Blair nodded, "And spacious. We're even going to have an apartment in the downstairs space with all the amenities."

"Really?"

"It has a small garden too," Blair smiled. "And we were wondering if maybe you'd like to live there."

The room went deathly quiet as Blair's offer echoed in the room.

"Cyrus, did you hear me?" Blair inquired as she bit her lip in nervousness.

"I did," Cyrus nodded. "But wouldn't you rather have it as a possible place for your father and Roman to stay when they visit?"

"Daddy and Roman can always stay at the new hotel Chuck and I are partnering in opening," Blair said. "We've talked about this a lot, and both Chuck and I want you to live there."

"It's true, Cyrus," Chuck nodded, "We'd like it very much."

"I miss you too much, Cyrus," Blair added. "Daddy is happy here in France with Roman. I understand that, but I know how lonely you've been here since my mother died. You even said earlier this evening that you missed the New York skyline and all the people living there. Come home, Cyrus, please."

"You and Chuck are very kind," Cyrus began.

"It's more than kindness," Blair shook her head. "I can hear how lonely you are when we talk. I hate that you're all by yourself. I'm worried about you."

"But before you go any further, do not misinterpret our offer as a pity ploy." Chuck added quickly. "Cyrus, your family is in New York, your work is there. I know Eleanor's memories are here, but they're in New York as well. We'd very much like for you to move into the apartment. It was intended for no one but yourself."

"And you'd be able to watch the children grow up," Blair put her hand on his. "I would love that."

"As would I," Cyrus confessed.

"So," Blair prodded.

"Can I let you know in the morning?"

"Yes," Blair nodded. "I'm just glad you're not saying no immediately."

"It is a very intriguing offer," Cyrus admitted, "But it does require a bit of thought."

"As we expected," Chuck nodded.

"Take your time," Blair smiled. "And know that the offer is always open even if your initial answer is no."

"You are a bright light in my life," Cyrus told her as he cupped her face in his hands, "Your mother was so very proud of you, as am I. I love you, Sweetheart."

"I love you too," Blair smiled.

"Good night," he smiled as he kissed her forehead.

"Good night," she said as she watched Cyrus go to bed.

Chuck took her into his arms as soon as they were alone.

"He's going to say yes, right?" she asked with a slight smile.

"I think so," Chuck nodded. "But even if he doesn't, he knows that the offer is always open."

"If he doesn't move home, we might be moving to Paris," Blair said, only half-kidding.

"I'll look into old hotels in the morning."

"The start of our own Bass/Waldorf empire," she smiled, "I like the sound of that."

"Taking on the world one city at a time," he smirked, "The world doesn't stand a chance."

-x-x-x-x-

Chuck reached out to tug Blair closer as he felt the sun's rays heat the bedroom. He felt the empty space and opened his eyes when he heard a gurgle. Sabrina was lying in the space next to him.

"I was expecting Mommy, but you're a welcome sight," he told her as he rubbed her belly softly, drawing out a soft giggle that warmed his heart.

"We're out here," Blair called from the tiny balcony off the bedroom. "I'm showing Sebastian how pretty the street looks in the early morning light."

Chuck took a moment to stretch his muscles before he donned a robe, picked up Sabrina and joined the duo. "No sense in leaving Sabrina out of such a spectacular sight."

"Sebastian was up early, so I put Sabrina in our bed and brought him out here," Blair smiled as Chuck's free arm made its way around her shoulders and his lips kissed the top of her head. "How'd you sleep?"

"Very well," he replied. "You?"

"I was a little too anxious," she admitted, "I really want Cyrus to say yes."

"I know you do. I do, too," Chuck said. "But we can't force him to come home with us."

"Why not?" Blair pouted.

"Because it's his decision," Chuck told her gently.

"I don't like that answer," she continued to pout.

"But it's the truth."

"I know," Blair sighed. "I used to come out here in the morning and watch the sun come up and think about where you were and wish that there was some way I could let you know what was going on."

"I'd go out most mornings, as well," he admitted, "And I'd have those same thoughts. I'd wonder what you were doing and wish with all my heart that you'd be there when I turned around."

"Let's go for a walk later," Blair suggested. "Just us. Cyrus wants some time to play with his grandchildren and Daddy and Roman won't be here until tomorrow."

"Perhaps I could interest you in taking lunch in the Eiffel Tower," Chuck suggested.

"Sounds like a good idea," Blair nodded.

"Then perhaps we could go to the top observation deck and enjoy the view," he added.

"Are you planning all of this because of what I said to Sabrina yesterday when we first arrived?" Blair eyed him curiously.

"I just want us to have good memories of Paris. No more cabs driving away or being told I was going to be a father by a person other than the mother of my children."

"Just walking along the river is enough for me," Blair assured him, "Hand in hand, the way it was always supposed to be."

"You should show me the fountain you knocked Serena into," Chuck teased.

"Okay, in my defense I was just starting to suspect I was pregnant, and I was highly emotional and very nervous," Blair defended herself.

"Your actions need no defense with me," he assured her, "We've all wanted to push Serena into a fountain at one point or another. I just wish I was around for the splash. That must have been quite a sight."

Blair giggled and then pulled Chuck down for a kiss. "I love you."

"I love you," Chuck replied as he continued to nibble at her lips despite Sabrina and Sebastian making moves for their attention.

"No ignoring the kids, Bass," Blair reminded him. "C'mon. We should go down for breakfast."

Chuck nodded as Sabrina reached out for his face, poking it gently and then laughing.

Blair and Chuck made their way downstairs and found Cyrus in the dining room.

"Ah, good morning," Cyrus greeted. "The cook made the sausage that Dorota sent with you."

"Wonderful," Blair smiled, "I'm sure you missed the taste as much as I do."

"I do," Cyrus nodded, "As much as I miss Dorota."

"Anna is getting so big. Dorota and Vanya loved the present you sent for her first birthday, and I forgot to mention that Lily thought you were way too generous with Eric's graduation gift."

"Nonsense," Cyrus dismissed the notion.

"Have you given our offer any thought?" Blair inquired eagerly.

"I have," Cyrus nodded. "How big is this apartment?"

"Two bedrooms," Blair said.

"Good. I'll need an office."

"Is that a yes?" Blair shrieked in excitement.

"I'll need some time to pack up the house. You'll have to help me decide what of your mother's to save and what to give to charity. I'd like to be home before Halloween."

"Cyrus, this is such wonderful news!" Blair exclaimed as she darted over to where he was sitting and hugged him tight.

"Careful, we don't want to squish young Sebastian," Cyrus hugged her back. "I'll call Aaron later on to tell him the news. It'll be nice to be with you all for the holidays."

"You'll have to teach the twins about Hanukkah," Chuck smiled.

"And I hope you'll take part in our Christmas celebration because it's also the twins' birthday."

"Of course I will," Cyrus nodded.

"I'm just so happy," Blair stated as she hugged him again.

"I am, too, Dear. This is what your mother would've wanted. She wouldn't want me to be alone when there are so many people who want me around. Besides, I need to tell your children about their grandma," Cyrus smiled. "There are some stories a daughter doesn't know."

"I hope you'll share them with me as well," Blair replied as she kissed his check before she placed Sebastian in his highchair and took her seat at the table.

"I should rephrase," Cyrus smiled. "There are some stories a daughter shouldn't know."

Chuck laughed at Blair's expression.

"Cyrus, I was hoping to talk Blair for a romantic walk later on," Chuck said. "Do you think you could baby-sit for a while?"

"I would absolutely love to," Cyrus stated, "I'll happily spend as many hours with them as you deem me worthy."

"Thank you," Chuck smiled.

-x-x-x-x-

The Champs-Élysées was crowded, but Blair and Chuck didn't really notice as they walked along, oblivious to everyone but each other.

"This is perfect," Blair smiled.

"Such a beautiful day," Chuck announced as he looked to the crystal clear skies above.

"I wonder what would've happened if we'd been standing here when I told you I was pregnant."

"I probably would've stared at you in shock just a little too long, and you would've pushed me into the river."

"You could have used a little cooling off," Blair smiled.

"Funny," Chuck pulled her close and kissed her forehead. "Where were you when you found out?"

"At a café with Serena, staring at my croissant as I waited for the doctor to call back."

"You must have been scared," he replied.

"Scared, angry, alone, and happy all at once," she admitted.

"Happy?"

"I was having the baby of the man I loved. It was the one piece of you that I had left. I was going to savor it forever."

"And I was hiding in Prague," Chuck shook his head.

"I seriously considered telling Jack why I was so desperate to find you," Blair shook her head.

"In hopes of what?" Chuck hissed, "He would have done nothing with the news other than torture us both."

"But I had the next generation of Bass in me. Bart's grandchild was on the way. Jack would've been desperate to find you if for no other reason than to make you take responsibility."

"Not likely," Chuck shook his head, "It was another Bass heir to get in the way of what he felt was rightfully his."

Blair's eyes widened as she realized just what Jack might've done to her, "God, he could've killed me."

"I don't know if he's capable of murder," Chuck replied, "He's an asshole with zero conscience, but even he has his limits."

"Chuck, he tried to rape Lily. If he was angry enough, I don't think he has limits."

"Let's not ruin what is otherwise a perfect day with talk of Jack," Chuck tried to change the subject.

"Good idea. Now, I believe I was promised lunch," she said as she pointed to the cafe in front of them. "We can see if they have any menu items I can steal."

"Reinterpret," he amended as he guided her into the restaurant, "A Waldorf doesn't steal. They're so much better than that."

"Good point," Blair smiled. "By the way, I received some resumes from the C.I.A. before we left. We should talk about what we want in a chef."

"To do that we need to decide what time of cuisine is most appropriate," he told her.

"Well, we already decided that the name is going to be Sebastian's," Blair said as they walked up to the cafe and she held up two fingers for the hostess. "We should serve cuisine that matches that."

"French," Chuck nodded.

"And some American," Blair added. "Every French place has some American cuisine."

"True," Chuck nodded as he opened the menu. "You're going to have to translate this for me. I slept through French in high school."

"Along with every other class," she chuckled. "The only French you ever mastered was their kiss."

"To which I'll demonstrate right now if you wish," he half smirked devilishly.

"Maybe later," Blair smiled. "Crème Brulee."

"You want dessert first?"

"I think that's all I want."

"Aside from me."

"That goes without saying."

The sexual energy that passed between them was undeniable.

"I can't believe we're here together," Blair said looking around. "I never could've imagined this last summer."

"Nor I," he smiled, "But I'm immensely happy that we are."

Blair leaned across the table and kissed him. "Je t'aime, Chuck."

"I love you, too, Blair," Chuck smiled.

"I thought you said you slept through French class," she eyed him curiously.

"I remember certain phrases," Chuck smirked. "There's another one that I remember-"

"Don't you dare," Blair warned him.

"Je t'aime, Blair," he leaned in to kiss her again.

"Better," Blair smiled as they parted then she looked around. "Um, Chuck, we're being stared at."

"Let them stare," he told her as he pulled her towards him again, "Perhaps they'll learn something."

"Let's save the rest of the kissing for the top of the tower," Blair said giving him one more tiny kiss before she leaned back in her chair. "Do you want an actual meal?"

"The only meal I want is one that you'll only offer when we're alone together in bed," he smirked.

Blair began to blush profusely.

"You're beautiful in red," Chuck smiled taking her hand. "Can I convince you to wear something red to bed tonight?"

"How about a simple blush?" she suggested with a seductively raised eyebrow.

"That works for me," he chuckled softly.

"I thought it might," Blair smiled. "Decide what you want, the waitress is headed this way."

"Is your name on the menu anywhere?" he inquired as he browsed the menu quickly.

"No," Blair shook her head. "Food, Bass. Pick something."

"Choose for me," he told her.

"You might be sorry," Blair teased. "I could choose snails."

"I trust you."

Chuck sat back as Blair conversed flawlessly with the waitress, ordering what he hoped was something other than snails.

"I ordered water for us both. I hope that's okay. I'm not in the mood for wine even though I'm allowed to drink now."

"Water is fine," he nodded.

"And a French version of a grilled cheese sandwich," Blair smiled.

"I can't believe you remember that."

"You're surprised? Every time you came over for lunch, you always asked Dorota for grilled cheese."

"Nobody else in my life has ever paid that close of attention," he admitted.

Blair reached over the table and took his hand, "When I'd come over to your house, what did I always ask room service for?"

"Hot chocolate with cinnamon," Chuck said without hesitation.

"The Palace always had the best," Blair closed her eyes at the memory. She could almost taste the decadent treat on her tongue.

"And Dorota always made the best grilled cheese."

"You know, I'm willing to bet that Nate wouldn't be able to answer that question," Blair said. "You always paid attention to me."

"Nate would say it was caviar," Chuck responded, "Something obvious."

"No, he wouldn't say caviar. He still brings up the time I threw it at him during his mom's cocktail party when we were in seventh grade."

"I forgot all about that," Chuck laughed out at the memory. "How does Anne still think that Nate should be courting you? You threw fish eggs at him."

"Wait, go back," Blair gasped, "Anne still wants me and Nate together? I have two children with another man."

"Apparently, only a minor complication," he replied with a shrug.

"Oh my God," Blair shook her head. "I wonder if her saying that your mom would've loved me was a smokescreen."

"I think that was genuine. I have to believe my mother would have loved you. But I think it's William more than anything motivating Anne's encouragement. You know Nate's grandpa always loved you."

"Well, he's one reason I'm glad Nate and I never got any further than high school. He would have had us married as soon as we graduated."

"I'm sure the day after graduation was circled on his calendar for months, if not years."

"I wonder how much hell Nate caught when he told William that we broke up on prom night."

"Why didn't you ever say anything to me about that?"

"I was about to the day we graduated," Blair admitted. "But I chickened out."

"I'm not sure I was ready to hear it then," he replied.

"Chuck?"

"Yes?"

"I broke up with Nate at the prom," Blair said with a straight face.

"I'm glad you told me," he told her as sincerely as she'd told him. "I wanted you to know that I'm in love with you."

"I'm glad you told me," she smiled.

"And you?"

"Oh I am so in love with you," Blair smiled.

Their meal arrived moments later interrupting their kiss.

-s-s-s-s-s-s-

"You got the loaf," Blair smiled as Chuck came walking up with the bread in his hand. "But why do you have bread crumbs in your hair?"

"I kind of made the baker mad, and she threw some day old bread at me."

"You really should be learning French," she chuckled as she ran her fingers through his hair to remove the crumbs.

"Or take you with me when I go to the bakers to buy bread," he laughed along with her as he handed her the hard fought loaf of crusty bread.

"What did you say to the baker anyways?"

"I'm not sure. I ordered the bread okay. I said thank you. Then I said 'Votre petite-fille ressemble à un singe.' That's when she got mad."

"What were you trying to say?"

"I wanted to tell her that her granddaughter looked pretty in her dress."

"Chuck, you told her that her granddaughter looked like a monkey."

"I see the problem," he frowned. "I guess I deserved to be attacked."

Blair started to giggle, "Your heart was in the right place."

"Yeah, but where's my brain?"

"Pickled," Blair nodded with a cute smile.

"Shall we?" he offered his arm and guided her towards a nearby pond.

"I can't believe you suggested this. You always look so bored when I'd suggest this."

"It did bore me before," he admitted, "But that was when I was taking things for granted, no more. It puts a beautiful smile on your face. I'm not going to be denied that sight. It is the most beautiful in all of France."

"You say the best things sometimes," she smiled as she kissed his cheek.

"Thank you," Chuck smiled. "So, how are the twins?"

"Did Cyrus call and rat on me?"

"No, he ratted on you when I called him."

"We promised we wouldn't check in on them. It was going to be just an afternoon for the two of us."

"It will always be the four of us. It's how things work now. We shouldn't hide from that."

"That's pretty enlightened, Bass," Blair said as they stopped by the lake. "And very responsible."

"I'm trying," Chuck smiled.

"And doing an incredible job of it," she assured him.

"The ducks await," Chuck told her as he gestured towards the bread in her hands.

Blair stepped closer to the pond and began breaking up pieces of the bread and tossing it to the awaiting ducks.

"There's that smile I was waiting for," he grinned.

Blair turned towards him, looking at him curiously for a few moments before she burst into hysterical laughter.

"I don't understand what is so funny?" he frowned as he began running his hands through his hair, thinking perhaps he still had crumbs in his hair.

Blair was nearly doubled over by then.

She started to point behind Chuck and lean against him, "Be-behind you."

Chuck spun and looked towards what she was pointing at.

"The fountain?"

"You wanted to see the fountain where Serena took a swan dive. That's it," she continued to laugh. "I didn't realize it was so close."

"So that is the infamous fountain," he mused, "Don't be getting any ideas, Beautiful. You won't get me anywhere near it."

"I wouldn't push you," she replied.

"Now you wouldn't push me, but if I'd been in the vicinity last summer," Chuck raised an eyebrow at her.

"You'd have gotten wet," Blair agreed.

"Deservedly so," Chuck nodded.

"But I promise you'll be completely dry this summer," she assured him.

"Sounds like a good idea to me," Chuck smiled. "So, do you want to tell me how Serena ended up taking a bath?"

"Well, like I said I was just nervous and scared and Serena was being so Serena-like. All she kept talking about was the boys she was seeing and the Gossip Girl posts about Nate. By the way, have you had him tested for diseases? Because I saw some of those posts and those girls looked highly suspect."

"I will make an appointment for Nate to get himself tested," Chuck nodded as they talked about her ex as if he was a golden retriever with fleas, and not a young man capable of taking care of himself. "What else?"

"I was nervous about possibly being pregnant and worried because I hadn't heard anything about you, and Serena's chatter was just getting on my nerves. So, we're walking by the fountain, and she's going on about some ridiculous pair of shoes when I finally couldn't take it anymore. So, I turned to her, told her to put everything down because I figured there was no reason for her to ruin her new purchases or her cell phone and after she did, I just shoved her into the fountain."

"She actually fell for that?" he laughed.

"Literally," Blair laughed.

"So, what did she say when she surfaced?"

"She demanded what to know what was going on with me, and I finally told her. She then proceeded to curse your name and repeatedly ask why I hadn't told her."

"Why hadn't you?"

"You know me. I internalize my problems," Blair said as she finished her loaf and turned back to him. "I also do denial really well."

"One thing we both excel at."

"Well, if there's one thing we do well, we might as well excel at it," she smiled.

"I think I excel at something else besides denial."

"I can vouch for that," Blair smirked as the two of them started to walk out of the park.

"We have time and unlimited funds. We could stop along the way, and I can show you how well I excel," he suggested. "There is a plethora of hotels along our way."

"Are you suggesting we hit each one?"

"I think that would be hard to explain to Cyrus."

"Not as hard as checking in with no luggage."

"You happen to be with a man that is an expert in that form of registry," he told her.

"Tell me something I don't know."

Chuck considered her request and leaned in and whispered in her ear.

"I actually did know that," Blair nodded when he pulled back. "You did that with Hazel sophomore year."

"Are you sure?"

"That's what she said," Blair said.

"I slept with Hazel," Chuck looked confused. "Why don't I remember that?"

"It's most likely not true," Blair rolled her eyes, "Hazel was always trying to impress me."

"But then how did you know I could do that?"

"It's a natural assumption, I guess," she admitted.

"So, shall we go somewhere so I can demonstrate?"

Blair checked her watch, "We can't. Cyrus will be wondering what happened to us."

"As I've pointed out," Chuck reminded her, "We have time."

"Then by all means, let's see," she challenged him.

"There," Chuck pointed.

"Perfect," she nodded.

"Follow me," Chuck took her hand and led her into the hotel.

At the desk, Blair played Chuck's translator at the front desk, blushing as she translated the suggestive comment the front desk clerk made about needing a room for a few hours.

"Excuse me," Chuck looked a little mad. "She-"

"Chuck, calm down."

"I will not calm down, he thinks the love of my life is a prostitute."

Blair stared at him for a moment and then turned him to her before she planted a kiss on him that blanked his mind.

"Let them think that," she whispered as she pulled away.

"Are you sure?"

"It's kind of hot," Blair whispered. "I'll play the prostitute as long as you pay me well."

"How about the brownstone of your dreams, two beautiful children, and a bottomless bank account," he offered.

"That works," she laughed.

"Now give the man your credit card, so we can be on our way."

"Oui cher," Chuck smiled as he handed over the credit card to the man at the desk.

"You're pretty good at faking French."

They were handed their key and set off on a frantic dash, barely getting to their room before they began ravishing each other.


	32. Chapter 32

Here's the next chapter in our little ditty. Thanks for everyone who replied last time and to my splendorific beta.

"We should throw Cyrus a welcome home party," Blair announced as Cyrus was sitting with Sabrina in his lap, bouncing her up and down.

"I don't need a party," Cyrus protested. "A nice dinner with you, Chuck, the children, and perhaps Serena and her family is all I'm going to need."

"Nonsense," Blair waved off his suggestion, "A big party with all the trimmings."

"Charles," Cyrus turned to his step-daughter's boyfriend, "Will you talk to her?"

"Blair, Darling, not everyone appreciates being the center of attention like you," Chuck reminded her.

"But I want to throw a party," she pouted.

"And you will," Cyrus said. "When the hotel opens and then your birthday and then the birthday of these little angels. I think that'll be enough parties."

"But I just want everyone to know how glad I am that Cyrus is home," Blair responded with her most charming smile.

"I'm sure they'll get the message loud and clear," Chuck assured her as he caressed her chin softly with his freehand while successfully balancing Sebastian on his knee with his other hand.

"I wish Daddy and Roman would get here already," she stated as she rose from her seat and began pacing. "My cake is best served warm and it's rapidly cooling."

"I must say how impressed I am at the wonderful cook you're becoming," Cyrus beamed. "I enjoyed dinner last night. I've never had macaroni and cheese with panko breadcrumbs."

"Thank you," Blair blushed.

"I was more partial to the dessert," Chuck smiled. "Blueberry coffee cake is always a good choice."

Blair raised an eyebrow, "Just the blueberry coffee cake?"

"That's all I'm going to admit to with Cyrus in the room," Chuck leered.

"Charles Bass!" Blair exclaimed as she blushed further.

"We're going to pretend that we haven't heard this conversation, aren't we Sabrina," Cyrus smiled.

"I hear a car," Blair turned to the window like a puppy that hears their master's car pulling into the driveway, nearly pressing her face against the glass to catch a look. "It's Daddy and Roman."

Blair raced out the door and launched herself into her father's arms before he was able to get his bearings. He was knocked back against the car.

"I missed you, too, Blair Bear," Harold laughed.

Blair hugged him tighter. "I missed you. It's been far too long. You should have come to New York."

Harold laughed, "I think you needed to recover and find your bearings without your father looking over your shoulder. Now, where are my grandchildren?"

"They're getting so big," Blair told him as she gave a polite hug to Roman before she linked arms with her father and charged towards Cyrus's home so show them off.

"Hello Cyrus," Harold greeted before accepting Sabrina from him.

"And hello, Little Girl," Harold greeted Sabrina, "You are such a beautiful little thing, just like your mother at that age."

"Hey, that implies I'm not beautiful at this age," Blair whined defensively.

"You're as beautiful as you were the first time you dumped sand all over me," Chuck said with a smile as he allowed Roman to take Sebastian from him.

"Quite the charmer, Bass," Blair wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Such a sweet little boy," Roman stated even though Sebastian was making his uncomfortable face and was moments away from crying.

"Oh, Roman," Blair disentangled herself from Chuck. "I'm sorry. Sebastian's not big on strangers."

Sebastian continued to make his pouty face even though he was now in the familiarity of his mother's arms.

"It's okay, Little Man," Chuck tried to soothe him, rubbing his back as Blair bounced him around, "It's just Grandpere Roman."

"I think someone needs a nap," Blair said. "I'm sorry, but he was up very early."

"It's alright," Harold said. "We'll be here a while."

"I'll put him down," Chuck offered, "You've waited far too long to spend time with your father."

"Thank you," Blair smiled. "We'll wait for cake and tea until you come back."

"Thank you," Chuck stated as he kissed her.

"You're looking much healthier," Harold proclaimed as he passed Sabrina to Roman, who didn't mind in the slightest at being in his arms. "What have the doctors been saying about your recovery, Blair-Bear?"

"Well, I'm cleared to resume all my activities," Blair smiled. "And I'm off my medications. But I still have a ways to go before I'm completely recovered."

"Well, all that is good news," Harold smiled.

"And I have more news. Chuck and I are going into business together," Blair smiled as she sat down on the couch with her father. "And we've purchased a brownstone for ourselves."

"I hope you aren't spreading yourself too thin, Sweetheart," Harold told her in concern, "With the twins, and your cafe in New Jersey, are you sure you'll have enough energy for another business venture?"

"I sold the cafe, Daddy."

"What?"

"I couldn't keep it after everything."

"But you loved that cafe," Harold reminded her.

"But I don't love the memories associated with it. And going into business with Chuck is a great opportunity for the both of us. We're doing it as a team, and I still get to run my own cafe in the lobby."

"You'll have to send pictures," Roman said. "We'll make sure to come visit."

"And this brownstone," Harold stated, "What is it like?"

"It's absolutely lovely," Blair smiled happily, "Spacious, private, it has its own backyard, an oversized kitchen, plenty of bedrooms upstairs for Sabrina and Sebastian to have their own rooms when they're ready and maybe room for more children if Chuck and I choose. It also has a luxurious apartment in the downstairs space for one Mr. Cyrus Rose."

"Cyrus, you're moving back to the states," Harold asked, surprised.

"Your daughter is very persuasive when she wants to be," Cyrus nodded. "I called a real estate agent to put the house on the market yesterday, and Blair's agreed to come back and help me pack when I'm ready."

"Roman and I will miss having you in Paris. It gave us a reason to come to the city more often," Harold replied. "But we completely understand your motivations for moving home. I must confess that I've had those thoughts a time or two."

Blair's ears perked up at the confession. She was just about to suggest that her father move home as well.

"But it's a fleeting thought," Harold added quickly.

"Uh, Cyrus, should I tell Serena and Nate that they'll need to find somewhere else to live next year, or are you going to keep the penthouse for now?"

"They can stay as long as they like," Cyrus told her. "I'm in no rush to sell the penthouse."

"But I think Dorota is looking to move on," Chuck stated as he entered the living room after putting Sebastian down. He was asleep before his tiny head hit the bed. "Nathaniel has said she's been muttering a lot in Polish lately."

"Really," Blair frowned. "I'll have to talk to her when we get home. I hope she's not unhappy."

"Sweetheart, I was hoping to be able to take a stroll with you this afternoon, just the two of us," Harold proposed.

"Of course," Blair smiled. "But first, we have cake and tea to consume."

"And she's kept me away from it long enough," Chuck groaned. He'd been trying to sneak a taste from the moment she began cooking, first the batter and then the crumbs.

"He's very impatient when it comes to sweets."

Blair went about dishing up the cake and tea as small talk was made all around.

-x-x-x-x-

"So Daddy, is everything alright?" Blair asked as they walked along the street.

"As long as my daughter is as happy as she appears, then everything is very alright," Harold assured her, "I just wanted to get you along to ensure that."

"I am happy, I promise," Blair smiled. "Chuck and I are wonderful. Our children are perfect."

"Are you and Charles discussing a future, beyond business associates and co-parents?" he inquired.

"I love him, Daddy. I want my life to be with him."

"Does he feel the same way?" Harold asked.

"He says he does," she nodded.

"And do you believe him?" he pressed.

"I do," she replied. "Finally, yes, I do believe him."

"Good," Harold nodded. "I know I've never been a big fan of Charles, but I can tell that he makes you happy and that he loves you. I know things were bad last year, but you and he clearly seemed to have moved past it."

"We have," Blair nodded. "He's a good man, Daddy, and he's a terrific father. He's so much better than he believes."

"Bart wasn't very big on making his son feel good about himself. I remember that much about Bart Bass," Harold frowned. "It's a shame that Evelyn wasn't around. I think he'd have been a different man if she'd lived."

"He would have been," Blair nodded, "But she's not. Chuck and I can no longer allow ourselves to look back. We've made mistakes. It's time to put all of that out of our minds."

"That's a little easier said than done, Blair-Bear," Harold told her, "You've always excelled at holding grudges, even with Roman. You still blame him for breaking up my marriage to your mother and moving to France."

"I do not," she stated defensively.

"Blair," Harold prodded. "It's okay to be mad about things that happened long ago."

"You loved Roman. It's not something that could be helped. If falling in love with Chuck has taught me anything, it's that you can't help who you love. I was supposed to be in love with Nate but that was just a fantasy. The Nate I wanted didn't exist."

"He's very lucky that we never lived in Israel."

"Nate? Why?"

"They shoot men who are untrue there."

"They do that in Poland as well," Blair laughed, "At least according to Dorota. And Daddy I am happy that you found Roman, but you're right, I'm not happy with how everything happened. You left me in New York."

"Even if I had tried to take you with me, your mother wouldn't have let me."

"I don't care," Blair shook her head, "It would have been nice if the gesture had been made. At least then I would have known you cared."

"I did care, Sweetheart," he told her, "If I'd thought you wanted to come with me, I would have taken you, but you were so angry with me at first."

"I wasn't angry at you," Blair shook her head. "I was angry at the situation. I didn't want my family to end up as screwed up as Serena's. I didn't want Mom to marriage hop like Lily. Daddy, you saw what it did to Eric and Serena."

"I did," Harold nodded. Realizing the conversation had taken a heavy turn, he knew it was time to change the subject. "How is Eric? Did he like my graduation gift?"

"Yes, but Lily won't let him drink it for three more years."

"Then he'll have to come and join us at the vineyard for a week before he starts Columbia. He's legal here."

"I'll suggest it to him," Blair nodded. "Maybe he can come back with me when I come to help Cyrus pack. He was saying he wants to be back in New York before the holidays."

"I think you and Charles are doing a great thing by having Cyrus come and live with you in New York. He's been much too lonely since your mother died."

"I know," Blair nodded, "And I'm so happy he's agreed."

"It's a good apartment?"

"Yes, it's wonderful and you and Roman will always have a place to stay when you come to visit."

"In the apartment?" Harold asked in confusion.

"At the hotel," she responded, "It's a short distance away. Chuck and I walk it every weekend with the children."

"That sounds wonderful," Harold smiled. "I can't wait to see it. Perhaps in November. I seem to remember someone's twenty-first birthday will be falling that month."

Blair smiled softly, "Mom and I always planned grand parties for that day."

"You can still have that grand party," Harold told her, "Whatever you'd like, I'll be sure to give it to you, whenever and wherever you'd like."

Blair hugged her father, "Thank you, Daddy."

=x=x=x=x=x=

"You're quiet," Chuck remarked as they lay in bed that night after the house had gone to sleep.

"Just enjoying the quietness," she smiled into the blackness, "This is the first peace and quiet we've had all day."

"How was your walk with your dad?"

"It was nice. He just wanted to make sure I was happy. I think he wanted to make sure your intentions were honorable."

"And did you assure them they were?"

Blair smiled in the dark and took Chuck's hand in hers, "Well, there are a few of your intentions that are less than honorable, but I glanced over those."

"Very kind of you," Chuck laced their fingers.

"What are you thinking about, Bass?" she asked as she traced rhythmic patterns along his hand with her finger.

"How humbled I am that you are including me in your family," he replied, "It's something I haven't really had for a long time, ever really."

Blair turned on her side and moved their hands so that they were in the space between the pillows, "You've had it longer than the twins have been alive and maybe a little longer than you and I have been together. Lily didn't just become your mother in name only. She loves you Chuck. You're her son as much as Eric is."

"It doesn't feel like it does with you," he replied, "At times it feels forced...uncomfortable. When I see you with Cyrus, it's so natural. There isn't even a hesitation, Roman is a little different, but it still feels like this one big family. True or not, sometimes I think Lily feels I'm more of an obligation."

"That's ridiculous," Blair replied.

"Is it?"

"Yes," Blair said in an annoyed tone of voice. "If it was an obligation she would've more than likely stopped talking to you after the debacle with Jenny. I'm willing to bet that Rufus asked her to. She loves you, Chuck and so does Serena."

"Yeah, well Serena loves everybody," he rolled his eyes through the darkness, "It's part of her bubbly blonde personality."

"How soon you forget her reaction to Bart and Lily getting married," Blair said.

"Well, that was before my brotherly charm won her over," he chuckled.

"She likes it when you call her 'Sis' now," Blair told him. "She used to hate it."

"Well, that's up for debate," he stated, "But she doesn't cringe when I say it, so it is progress."

"What was it she said when you lit up in her bathroom?"

"Our parents may insist on blending our families but we are not related. I do not share any of your DNA nor do I ever wish to."

"And you told her to get new hand towels."

"Which she never did," he recalled, "Perhaps a house warming gift in the making when she quits playing house at the penthouse and decides to be adult enough to buy her own home."

Blair giggled and moved a little closer to Chuck, kissing his shoulder, "This has been a great few days."

"But the real world is calling," he frowned.

"Our family in New York, the new house, and the hotel all demanding our attention. Plus I have to call Dorota and see what's going on."

"I'm almost afraid to find out the answer to all of that," Chuck stated hesitantly. "I can only imagine what habits of Nathaniel's are annoying her."

"Maybe she found his weed," Blair giggled again.

"And he probably won't share," he added, "That's always been his problem."

"Well, he didn't want to share me," Blair snuggled closer.

"Neither did I," Chuck smiled, enjoying her body warmth.

"So tomorrow we go back to New York," Blair summarized as she felt herself nodding off.

"Yes," he nodded, "I'll put the jet on standby first thing."

"I'm almost sorry Cyrus said yes to moving back," Blair yawned.

"Why?"

"I think living in Paris would be fun," she mumbled.

"We can come back anytime."

"I like that idea," she replied as she faded asleep.

"Me too," Chuck kissed her forehead before he closed his eyes too.

=x=x=x=x=x=

"This wouldn't have happened if you had listened to me," Blair snapped as she picked up her son to comfort him after he conked his head on the seat he was crawling around. It wasn't until Blair was rocking him in her arms that he began to wail.

"Blair, you can't blame me. Is Sebastian okay?" Chuck asked looking over Blair's shoulder.

"Like you care," she stated curtly, "You let these two crawl all over the plane after I specifically told you not to allow it."

"That's not fair," he responded, "I care about them as much as you do, but we cannot keep them in a protective bubble for their entire life."

"He bumped his head," she stated, "He could have a concussion, and we're at fifty thousand feet."

"We were both watching," Chuck reminded her, "He barely hit his head. He's crying because you're babying him."

"He is a baby," she snapped.

"Yes, but you can't always treat him like one," Chuck said. "If we act like it's the end of the world then so will he."

"And how do you know this?"

"I did a lot of reading when I was trying to find the three of you," Chuck reminded her.

"So, now you're Doctor Spock," Blair responded, "Fantastic, tell me Spock, what do we do if he has a concussion?"

"Blair, he did no more damage to himself than if we had knocked our own heads."

"But-"

"Stop," Chuck ordered. "He barely bumped himself. He's a crawling baby. It's going to happen."

"Well, I don't want it to happen. We are going to put bumpers all over the brownstone."

"You're being ridiculous," he told her as he bent over and picked up Sabrina who was looking at her parents with worry as she tugged at his trousers. It was evident that she didn't appreciate her parents yelling at each other.

"Don't tell me about being ridiculous. We're renovating two buildings. They could get seriously hurt."

"I'll buy them both cute yellow hard hats," he told her.

"You're making fun of me," Blair looked outraged.

"No," Chuck shook his head. "But, you have to realize that kids get hurt. Nate and I used to get cut and bruised all the time growing up."

"So, you're telling me boys will be boys?"

"Yes," he nodded, "And I'm sure you and Serena had your own cuts and bruises. In fact, I remember you falling and scraping your knees once trying to impress the two of us."

"You had your dad's car take me home," Blair remembered.

"Yes, and you were very brave," he told her as he risked kissing the tip of her nose. "You didn't cry once the entire time. In fact, I remember you being more worried about potential scars and ruining your favorite dress."

Blair sat down on the couch and pulled up the skirt she wore to point at her knee, "I kept picking at it and making it bleed. Dorota kept scolding me."

Chuck sat down next to her and ran a thumb over the scar on her knee, "And the dress?"

"Pressed and cleaned," Blair smiled. "Mom never knew."

"I've never truly noticed this before," he told her as he continued to caress the tiny imperfection tenderly.

"You're more interested in body parts north of my knee," Blair smiled.

"Now, that's not entirely true. I'm interested in your entire body," Chuck smirked as he continued to caress her knee softly as he leaned in to nuzzle at her neck, "And all of your scars."

"Even the ones you can't see," Blair asked.

"Especially the ones I can't see," Chuck told her seriously.

"I still fear you'll run out on us," Blair admitted, "I wake up some mornings, and you've gone to check on the twins, so you aren't in bed, and I begin to panic. It's only after I hear your voice on the baby monitor that I relax and allow myself to fall back to sleep."

"Blair, I know I haven't always been dependable, but I promise you that I am not going anywhere. After your surgery, I was sitting with you, and I promised you that I was done running away from us. I know you couldn't hear me then, so I'm telling you again. I'm not going to disappear in the middle of the night. You're stuck with me even if you yell at me for something stupid, and I storm out. I will come back. I will always come back," Chuck told her honestly. "You know, maybe we should talk about where this stems from. I know it's not all me and my crap."

"No, it's not," Blair nodded. "Some of it comes from my dad walking out. I have been in enough therapy to be honest about that."

"I know you love your father," Chuck began, "But what he did was horrible. No matter his relationship with your mother, he should have stayed for you. If not in New York, at least in the country. Even today, I do not think he knows how much he scarred you mentally. I'm not him, Blair. I'm not going to fall in love with someone else, male or female. I'm not going to put an entire ocean between us. I'm going to be there, every day, fighting to make this work."

Blair put a hand on the side of his face and leaned forward, closing her eyes as she touched her forehead to his. Chuck noticed a few tears slipping down her cheeks.

"When did you get to be so amazing?" she asked quietly. "It's like that immature, sex-crazed boy just evaporated one day and left this amazing man in his place. I don't think I ever realized it until it was staring me in the face."

"I still have days where I'm that immature, sex-crazed boy," he admitted, "But being a father tames those urges, especially the father of this little beauty. I want to be a good example for her and her brother."

"Because you've heard the old adage that girls look for men like their fathers," Blair teased.

"That's not funny," Chuck shook his head as he pressed a kiss to Blair's forehead. "She's going to find someone the opposite of me."

"Honestly, I think if she found someone like you, she'd be lucky."

"I'm not a good guy," Chuck shook his head, "I have too much baggage."

"You are too a good guy," Blair told him, "And we all have baggage. It's how you overcome that baggage that makes you a good guy."

"I ran and did drugs and slept with loose women," Chuck shook his head.

"And you got shot and came home to fight for your family. Despite all of that, and maybe even because if it, I still see an amazing man," Blair replied, "Look at yourself, Bass. Look at that little girl in your arms. Look how comfortable she is there and how comfortable you are with her. The fact that you're not proud of those things in your past, tells me that you're changing. You're becoming a better man."

"That's not the first time you've said something like that to me," Chuck remembered.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there for the anniversary this past year," Blair said. "I poured some scotch and said a toast, but I poured it down the drain."

"I did too," he replied, "Scotch went right down the drain. It tasted awful, as everything always did."

"Maybe when we get home, we should take the twins and introduce them to their grandparents," Blair ventured.

"Have you taken the twins to Eleanor's grave?"

"Actually, yes, I have. Dorota and I went about two weeks ago."

"I haven't been to my parents' grave since that night I found that bogus locket," he admitted.

"I'll go with you this time," Blair said. "I would've gone last time, if you'd let me."

He nodded as he kissed Sabrina's forehead. Her little eyes pierced her father's, drawing a smile to his lips.

"They're good tonics for foul moods," Chuck smiled as he tickled under Sabrina's chin.

"Yes, they are," Blair smiled as she pressed her lips against Sebastian's head. "You know what else a good tonic for a foul mood is?"

"Waldorf, are you suggesting mile high sex?" he raised a curious eyebrow to her.

"Absolutely," Blair nodded. "But we need to lay these two down for naps first. I want no more bumps or bruises on this flight, unless of course they're collateral damage."

"Noted," Chuck nodded as he stood up with Sabrina in his arms. "I think I have an advantage. Sabrina's half asleep."

"Do you really think Sebastian is going to be okay?" Blair inquired as she kissed his head, where he'd bumped it minutes earlier. His tears had dried up, and he was smiling happily.

"Yes, I do," Chuck nodded. "He's a good, strong baby, remember?"

"I remember," she nodded.

"Let's put them to bed first," Chuck said. "Then let's get into bed ourselves."


	33. Chapter 33

Okay so first, I have to apologize to Sala for my comment about Israel last chapter. The only things I know about Israel come from watching NCIS. If I offended anyone else I apologize to you as well. Now I have thank Sala as she was my 300th reply.

Enjoy everyone and keep the replies coming. 4 more weeks!

-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair was standing at the counter making notes for the contractors when the door opened. She looked up to see Dorota.

"Dorota? What are you doing here?"

"I come to see you, Miss Blair. I hear Mr. Nate tell Miss Serena that Mr. Cyrus moving home."

"Yes," Blair nodded happily. "He'll probably be calling you soon."

"I clean up his room when I get back. When Mr. Nate and Miss Serena move out?"

"They're not. Cyrus is moving into the basement apartment of the Brownstone."

"They not move out?"

"No," Blair shook her head.

"Well, then I come work for you and Mr. Chuck."

Blair studied the maid, "Dorota, what is going on?"

"It Mr. Nate and Miss Serena," she paused for a moment as if searching for the right words. "They make noise."

"They're fighting?"

"No. Fighting I could handle. You and Mr. Nate fight. You and Mr. Chuck fight. You and Miss Serena fight. Miss Eleanor and Mr. Harold fight. Fighting I used to. No, this is noises I never hear anyone make before. Well, I hear you make noises like it when you with Mr. Chuck, but you were in shower and I could turn on vacuum cleaner to block out. I cannot block this out, and I start to think that Vanya and I do something wrong."

"Oh, Dorota, I'm so sorry," Blair responded, biting her lip to keep from laughing.

"They everywhere," Dorota stated. "No place safe."

"I'll talk to Serena. In fact, Chuck and I are having dinner at Lily's tonight, so why don't you go home early and take Anna to the park or something?"

"Thank you, Miss Blair," Dorota said. "But what about Mr. Nate?"

"He can order pizza."

"No more moaning," Dorota stated as she covered her ears with her hands as she shook her head from side to side. "My ears still ring. Perhaps I work for you, Miss Blair, at Brownstone."

"I'll talk to Chuck, I promise," Blair put an arm around Dorota as she guided her to the door. "And if not the Brownstone, I can always put you in charge of housekeeping here at the hotel."

"My own staff to boss around," Dorota's eyes went wide with intrigue.

"The choice will be yours," Blair laughed.

"Thank you, Miss Blair."

"You're welcome," Blair smiled. "Kiss Anna for me and I'll tell Vanya he doesn't have to pick you up tonight."

"I get limo?" Dorota asked hopefully.

"All to yourself," Blair nodded and then motioned to Arthur as they stepped out onto the street. "Take Dorota home, okay, Arthur? Then swing by and pick Chuck and the children up. I'll meet them at Lily's."

"Of course, Miss Waldorf," Arthur nods as he opened the door for Dorota.

Blair barely made it back into the cafe before she started to giggle hysterically.

-x-x-x-

"Hey, you're late," Chuck hugged her. "Busy day of remodeling?"

"It was a busy day, but then I was sidetracked by Dorota," Blair explained. "She's having challenges with the residents at my mother's penthouse."

"Hey, Nate and I are those residents," Serena stated defensively.

"Yes, I know," Blair nodded as she started to giggle again. "And do you know what Dorota's complaint was?"

"Do we even want to know?" Chuck asked with a sense of dread.

"Do you remember when we'd take a 'shower' at my house and every time we'd get out, Dorota was running the vacuum cleaner?"

Chuck nodded as he eyed her curiously.

"Well, even that doesn't block out the noises Serena and Nate make."

"Serena is a screamer, huh," Chuck concluded.

"CHUCK!" Serena exclaimed in mortification.

"It can't be Nate," Chuck laughed, "I shared a hotel suite with him for a year."

"She said that the moaning was still ringing in her ears," Blair was still giggling.

"Oh god," Serena moaned as the mortification increased.

"Demonstrating for us?" Chuck laughed.

"What's so funny?" Eric walked in.

"Dorota wants a transfer," Blair smiled.

"Serena too vocal?" Eric concluded.

"Eric!"

"What? We lived in the same apartment for most of our lives. I heard you. I heard Mom. God knows I heard Chuck."

"Thank god, I was still on restrictions when you lived with us, Little E," Blair sighed in relief.

"You never slept with Chuck when he lived here?" Eric asked. "I could've sworn I heard him yell your name once or twice."

"It was a common occurrence with others," Chuck admitted.

"I don't know whether to be happy or appalled at that."

"It's the highest of compliments, my darling," Chuck assured her as he kissed her cheek softly. "So, are you going to bring Dorota over to the Brownstone?"

"It's either that or put her in charge of housekeeping at the hotel," Blair said.

"Whichever you prefer," Chuck told her, "It's your decision."

"Then I'll let Dorota decide," Blair smiled as she kissed his cheek.

"What are we supposed to do?"

"Find a maid who is slightly hard of hearing," Eric advised his sister.

"Perfect solution," Chuck laughed.

"Blair, dear, did you just get here?" Lily greeted Blair as she inserted herself into the conversation.

"Few minutes ago," Blair hugged Lily. "I had to stop and talk to Vanya. I gave Dorota an early out today so he doesn't have to go get her."

"Well, we've been holding dinner for you. Everyone please have a seat," Lily instructed everyone.

"I'll be right there," Blair stated, "I just want to look in on my babies first. I haven't seen them all day."

"I'll go up with you," Eric said. "I didn't get a chance to see them when they got here."

Chuck pulled Blair into him to give her a lingering kiss before she disappeared to look in on their children.

-x-x-x-x-

"So, what's up, Eric?" Blair asked as they walked down the hall to Chuck's old room. "As much as I know you love the children, there's more to your offer than being the doting uncle."

"I was wondering if you needed a waiter for the café."

"Eric, you're a van der Woodsen, you don't need a job at my cafe," Blair told him.

"I'd like a job at your cafe," Eric replied.

"You're going to have a lot on your plate at Columbia already," Blair told him, "And on top of your relationship with Elliot. When do you think you'll find the time to have a job?"

"Elliot and I are going through a rough patch," Eric admitted.

"Why didn't you say anything?" Blair put an arm around him and pulled him into her side. "You know you can always come to me."

"I know, B," Eric smiled. "I just wanted to deal with it myself first before I started getting advice."

"Okay," Blair accepted his answer. "So, what is it? Jealousy?"

"More like geographical undesirability," Eric said.

"Come again?"

"Elliot's going to Berkley," Eric said.

"Ah," Blair nodded. "Long distance relationships don't work, right?"

"Right," Eric nodded, "Elliot thinks we'll be able to handle the distance, but I have my doubts. I think maybe we're getting too serious for each other. I'm only eighteen. I should be playing the field, right?"

"You're asking the wrong person," Blair laughed.

"Right," Eric nodded. "You were going to marry Nate for most of your life when you fell for Chuck."

"And if he asked me to marry him tomorrow, I'd probably say yes but I'd want to wait a while."

"Why is he waiting?" Eric inquired.

"Because we're not ready," Blair replied, "We still are working through our issues."

"But you'd say yes?"

"Without a doubt."

"I really like Elliot," Eric stated, "But . . ."

"If you have your doubts, that's okay," Blair assured him, "You've dealt with a lot of adversity in your young life. It's okay to be gun shy. In fact, I'd be surprised if you weren't."

"I'm glad you're home, B," Eric said. "Just in case I haven't mentioned it lately."

"I'm glad, too. And if you want a job, you've got it."

"Thank you," Eric replied as he hugged her close. "I can't really go to Serena with these types of things. She'd just tell me to keep pushing on with Elliot, and I know that's not what I wanted. I guess I just wanted someone to make it okay for me to feel the way I am."

"Two conditions," Blair said. "If you and Elliot break up, you date and two, you keep your grades up."

"Deal," he nodded.

"They really are beautiful children, Blair." Eric stated as he watched Blair gingerly lift a sleeping Sebastian out of the crib to hold him for a few moments.

"You don't have to tell me that," Blair smiled as she held Sebastian close, inhaling his unique baby scent.

Eric lifted Sabrina into his arms and did the same.

"You know you'll make a great dad one day," Blair said. "I really hope you get the chance."

"It'd be nice," Eric said. "But it can wait until after school is over and I have a career."

"Any ideas?"

"Maybe a doctor or a lawyer," Eric mused. "God knows I've got the arguing experience."

"Have you thought about business?" Blair inquired, "You'd have a fantastic mentor."

"I don't think I have the instinct to do what Chuck does and after seeing Nate's dad get in over his head so badly, it makes me a little gun shy."

"Speaking of Nate's dad, I have to call Nate. Chuck and I wanted to talk to the Captain about being a concierge."

"A concierge, really?" Eric asked in surprise.

"He's got a lot of contacts in the city, and he's still pretty smooth. We'll see what happens."

"That actually might be a good job for the Captain," Eric realized as he thought about it more.

"And even if I'm not his daughter-in-law, I will always see him and Anne as family. I'd like to give him a second chance."

"How very liberal of you," Eric laughed softly.

"Thank you," Blair smiled as she put her son back down. Then she leaned down and kissed Sabrina's forehead before Eric put her down. "Let's go have dinner."

Blair and Eric made small talk as they made their way to the dinner table where everyone was waiting for them.

-x-x-x-x-

"So, you still okay with hiring the Captain," Blair asked as Arthur drove them all home a few hours later.

"Of course," Chuck nodded, "But we'll make financial advising a strict no-no."

"Good plan," Blair smiled. "So, how bad are you going to rag on Nate for why Dorota wants to work somewhere else?"

"It's good fodder for months," he chuckled.

"I had the hardest time keeping a straight face when Dorota was talking to me."

"I'm glad she went to you and not me," he laughed, "I never would have gotten through it."

"I'd really like her to come to the Brownstone," Blair admitted, "But if given the choice, I think she might choose the new hotel."

"Then we'll just have to find a replacement Dorota."

"A replacement Dorota? She cannot be replaced."

"A substitute Dorota?"

"Better. But still not an option that I'd look forward to," Blair admitted.

"You don't have to give her the option. You can just bring her into the Brownstone."

"But I want her to be happy," Blair stated. "And I already gave her the hotel option. I think she's looking forward to her own staff. I'm kind of worried about the power going to her head."

"I seem to remember another enjoying the power," he chuckled as he began to nuzzle her neck, "But she might surprise you."

"Chuck, the children are less than five feet away," Blair moaned softly as he continued to nuzzle at her neck.

"They're asleep and they're way too young to realize what we're doing."

"You know what one of Dorota's complaints was? That the noises Nate and Serena were making made her feel like Vanya and she were doing something wrong."

"Well, I can speak from experience that the two of us are doing it right," he whispered seductively.

"Chuck," she moaned softly as his breath ghosted across her cheek.

"Back to the scene of your first crime," he told her as he pulled her into his lap, "When you first stole my heart."

"I thought I stole your heart in the sandbox," Blair giggled.

"The sandbox, the stage, and this limo," Chuck murmured. "One piece of my heart at a time. The child, the woman, and the girl who trusted me enough to give me her first time."

"Chuck, please," she whispered as she kissed him desperately.

"No need to beg," Chuck smiled.

"There is something so thrilling about this vehicle," she told him as she began to unbutton his shirt.

Chuck reached out quickly to lower the glass partition. "Arthur, take the scenic route."

Just as quickly the glass partition went up as Blair peeled the shirt and suit coat from his body in one motion, his tie still in place, although loosened from earlier in the evening.

She tugged at his tie as she began laying back against the cool leather, bringing him with her.

"You've become insatiable lately," he informed her.

"I went a year without," she reminded him, "Through the pregnancy cravings and long sleepless nights I was up with the twins, it was all I could think about sometimes. I've had this ache inside of me that has yet to be soothed."

"Is that a shot at my ego?" he smirked as he began divesting her of her blouse.

"No," she shook her head quickly as she held his tie firmly in her hands, using it at a leash to keep him close if he dared back away.

"No?" he prompted her.

"It just speaks to my need for you," she managed to say with a straight face.

There was a sudden laugh that derailed all their plans. Sabrina's eyes were opened wide, and she was watching in fascination.

"You're supposed to be asleep, Little Girl," Chuck told her as he tinkled under her chin. "Mommy is trying to return Daddy to the scene of the crime, and you are killing the mood."

Sabrina merely laughed.

"Sleep," Chuck told her as he slid his fingers closer to her eyes, gently closing her tiny little lids in encouragement. When he pulled his fingers away, her eyes stayed closed. "Such a good little girl."

Chuck watched Sabrina for a few minutes to ensure she was back to sleep before he returned his attention to Blair.

"That was a close one," he smirked as he finished undressing her.

"It's always an adventure with you," she added.

-x-x-x-x-

Blair sat down at a cafe table with a sample menu. She started to make notes.

Before her were several test dishes she'd had the potential baker make her. While she'd enjoyed cooking for her cafe in New Jersey, she knew she wasn't going to be afforded the same luxury as the volume at the café was going to be much greater. She still wanted to ensure that her influence was felt in the pastries.

She'd gone through three bakers already and had yet to be satisfied.

"Hey Blair," Dan entered with Jonathan.

"What are you doing here?"

"Just seeing how the taste testing is going," Dan responded, "And if you're going to ax this baker like the rest. If so, I want to watch. It's rather entertaining."

"Well, I'm glad you're here. We got the book and music catalog. You seemed to have a good instinct for it when I left you in charge at Thayer's. You wanna help me?"

"I would love to," Dan nodded as Jonathan reached for Blair.

"Hey Buddy," Blair took Jonathan and hugged him. "I also got some Columbia book lists from Nate. I figure it wouldn't hurt to carry some of the classics."

"How every practical of you," Dan stated as he watched Jonathan interact with Blair. It was becoming painfully obvious that he need a maternal influence in his life.

"Have you heard from Vanessa?" Blair inquired as she caught Dan's frown.

"I haven't but she called Dad. Apparently her mom told her what happened," Dan frowned deeper. "She had news."

"She's getting married," Blair guessed.

"She's pregnant."

"She's what?" Blair shouted.

"Pregnant," Dan repeated with a shake of his head. "I suppose I should be honored that I was the first to impregnate her."

"Take your son," Blair handed Jonathan back to his father and picked up her cell phone. "I think Dorota knows a hit man or something."

"The offer is tempting, but no thanks," Dan responded.

"I can hire some tasty college girls," Blair offered, "You should be able to work what little of that Humphrey charm you have to wear them down."

"Again thank you, but no," Dan shook his head. "That looks good." He picked up a fork and just before he dug in he looked at it more closely. "New silverware?"

"One of few things Chuck and I have been able to agree on," Blair sighed.

"I thought he was letting you take complete control of the café," Dan frowned in confusion.

"Yes, but I'm looking for silverware for the restaurant and that's a sample. Also, that's the type of napkin we're considering," Blair pointed.

Dan forked a piece of the cake and tasted it. "It's like sawdust," he cringed as he spit whatever it was that he'd eaten into said napkin.

"Jean-Michele," Blair called into the kitchen.

"Oui?"

"You are fired. Go back to the C.I.A. and tell them you need your pastry accreditation yanked."

"Miss Blair, not understanding," the young chef frowned.

"Did you taste this?" Blair inquired, "Not one of these is edible. I thought C.I.A. had the best of the best. I have yet to be impressed. Go back and relearn everything."

"But-

"Out! Now! Before I sic the Polish mafia on you," Blair pointed.

"Like I said, entertaining," Dan chuckled as the chef scrambled to gather her belongings.

"And the worst part? Not one of them can make a decent bull's-eye. I'm going to have to rework the breakfast menu."

"Perhaps you're shooting too high. Your food might be too simple for these fancy chefs. You need someone that knows something about home baking. You aren't going to find that at C.I.A."

Blair rested her forehead against her hand, "I truly hate it when you're right, Humphrey."

"I know," he nodded triumphantly.

"Oh, by the way, I found a great cookie recipe. You like peanut butter, right?"

"I'm allergic to peanut butter," he told her.

"Oh right. I had to take you to the emergency room when you accidentally ate it right after I hired you for Thayer's."

"Thanks for staying with me by the way. Three infants and a swelled employee couldn't have been fun."

"No, it wasn't fun, but necessary," Blair replied.

"You were a good sport."

"You more than returned the favor."

-c-c-c-c-c-

"You fired another pastry chef today, didn't you," Chuck stated as he came home to a wonderfully prepared meal of all his favorites. She was trying to butter him up in the most obvious of ways.

"Why would you say that?" Blair asked innocently. "I made red velvet cake tonight for dessert. Did you know it wasn't a traditional southern dessert? It was originally a signature dessert for the Waldorf-Astoria."

"Waldorf, you're tempting me with desserts," he told her, "Tell me you didn't fire the pastry chef."

"I had to. His cake tasted like sawdust."

"Blair, everyone's cake tastes like sawdust according to you," he groaned, "We're due to open in less than a month. We need to have a pastry chef in place now to be ready."

"I set up some interviews with some recent grads from NYU and Columbia."

"For pastry, what do NYU and Columbia grads know about that?" he exclaimed in outrage.

"Save the fancy pastries for the restaurant," Blair told him as she sat him in a chair and started to massage his shoulders. "I do things a lot simpler in the café. I want people who aren't going to get offended if I ask them to make a batch of chocolate chip cookies or a bull's eye."

"Blair, we're going for sophistication and refinement for our hotel."

"And the café is about relaxation and stirring memories of a simpler time. Chocolate chip cookies and bull's eyes do just that."

"What the hell is a bull's eye anyway," Chuck frowned.

"It's a piece of toast with the center cut out and an over easy egg in its place. It goes great with a cup of tea. Chuck, people don't always want linen napkins and thousand dollar silverware. Sometimes they just want a cup of coffee and a cookie. A book to read, music to listen to," Blair said.

"Some want elegance and a good scotch," he told her.

"That's what the restaurant is for," Blair reminded him. She walked around and straddled his lap. "This is going to work. We just have to trust that the other one knows what they're doing."

"The café just seems a little too simple," he told her gently.

"Do you trust me?" she asked.

"Always," he responded automatically.

"Then let me do this my way," she requested.

"Alright," Chuck nodded. "So, sawdust?"

"Dan took one mouthful and spit it out immediately."

"Then it must have been pretty bad," Chuck sighed in resignation. "Humphrey's palate isn't nearly as refined as ours."

"Oh and speaking of Humphrey, guess what?"

"Georgina showed up?"

"No," Blair shook her head. "Vanessa is pregnant."

"I'm sorry, what did you just say?"

"Yeah. I didn't get the whole story but she's pregnant."

"Wow, two kids in two years," Chuck stated in surprise. "Is she going to abandon this one as well?"

"I have no idea. I'm still stuck on the absolute hypocriticalness."

"And lack of virtue, apparently," Chuck added.

"I always said she was a slut."

"Enough about her, how was the rest of your day?" Chuck inquired, "You got to fire someone, which must have made the day pretty good."

"I gave Dorota her options today," Blair frowned, "She said she needs a couple of days to think it over."

"What do you think she'll choose?" he ran his hands up and down her back.

"As much as I think she'd enjoy being the head of housekeeping at the hotel, I think she'll go for the Brownstone. It's less time consuming and it has steadier hours and, as an added bonus, she has built in playmates for Anna," Blair smiled. "She saw what being a working mom did to my relationship with Mom. She would never want that to happen with Anna."

"Is that what you think or what you're hoping for?" he inquired.

"Both," she replied. "She's been such a part of my life for so long."

"I know," Chuck nodded. "I still remember her yelling at me in Polish the night Serena and I went to find you after you slept with Carter Baizen."

"What an awful time that was," she groaned. "And it was Baizen that I had to run into. God, the thought makes me cringe. I let him touch me."

"You did delouse after that right," Chuck teased.

"Yes, I'm very clean. I had Dorota burn the outfit I was wearing," Blair smiled. "But Carter can't be all bad. Serena seems to like him."

"Nate, Humphrey, and I think she got very close to a professor last year."

"Serena nailed her professor," Blair nearly shrieked.

"This seems a surprise for some reason," Chuck shook his head.

"How long do you think she and Nate will last?" Blair inquired.

"I hope they last for a while. I am so sick of watching what their break ups do to Nate. The one last year was the worst one."

"I hate to say it, but I don't think it will," she sighed, "Serena doesn't know what it takes to keep a stable relationship. Look at her role model."

"I should say something in her defense considering she's my mother too, technically, but I can't find the words."

"I hope I'm wrong," Blair added.

"Me too," Chuck nodded. "So, what's for dinner?"

"I grilled steaks and little red potatoes."

"And you for dessert?" he smirked.

"Well, I made a cake, but I'm flexible," she smiled.

"I know," he laughed. "You're so good at demonstrating."

"I walked right into that one."

"I don't mind."

"Dinner first," Blair told him. "I'm hungry."

"So am I," he told her lustfully.

"For food," she scolded him with a slap to the shoulder as she removed herself from his lap.

"Well, it smells great," Chuck smiled as she put their plates down. "The twins?"

"They're asleep, thankfully. Serena watched them today."

"And wore them out," Chuck smiled, "So we'll get time to ourselves."

"All that we need," she nodded.

"Any plans?"

"Quite a few, actually," Blair smirked.


	34. Chapter 34

Does anyone miss Gossip Girl or is it me? Thank you to all those who replied. My beta rocks!

"You need to be more discrete," Chuck said as he studied a menu.

"What on earth for?" Nate scoffed, "It's Dorota that should be discrete."

"We were taught better manners than getting it on in full view of the help," Blair frowned at Nate. "Though God knows you tried to persuade me otherwise."

"We pay the help to be discrete. If they have a problem with that, it's their option to walk away."

Serena slapped Nate upside the head. "That's exactly the problem. This is Dorota. She deserves better than that."

"She's a maid."

"She practically raised all of us."

"She's more than that and you know it," Blair told him sternly. "She practically raised all of us."

"Well, there isn't anything we can do about it now," Nate replied.

"You might apologize to her," Chuck suggested.

"Fine, first chance I get I'll apologize, but she's already made her decision to move on. What's done is done."

"And when Cyrus decides to hire someone else to keep the penthouse clean, you might keep your activities behind closed doors," Blair suggested.

"Fine, I'll keep the door closed next time," he sighed unhappily.

"Thank you," Blair said. "Also, no going at in in the living room."

"What!" Nate exclaimed, "Come on, you've got to give me some place outside the bedroom to work my magic."

"Magic," Serena rolled her eyes. "I promise Blair. The bedroom is the only place Nate will be getting lucky."

"With you anyways," he rolled his eyes.

"You are not to bring random girls into the penthouse," Blair ordered him. "If that's what you want, move out."

"And where exactly would I go? Chuck sold the Empire. The new hotel isn't due to open for at least another month."

"And, by the way, you two are not allowed to play grab ass in the elevator; together or apart," Chuck said.

"Why don't you just tell us where, when and how we can have sex," Nate suggested sarcastically.

"We've told you the where. You can have it whenever you want," Blair said. "As for the how, I think I'll let Chuck take care of that."

"Oh the possibilities," he rubbed his hands together in excitement.

"No thank you," Serena shook her head. "While I'm sure there are a few things you can teach us, I'll pass."

"I don't know, S," Blair giggled, "Perhaps you should allow the professor to teach. Maybe Nate would benefit, and in turn, so would you."

"Oh ew," Serena winced. "This is by far the most disgusting conversation I've ever had with you guys and I'm including the one I had with Chuck when confessed that he couldn't get it up and I made the mistake of accidentally suggesting Blair as sexual Drano."

"Sexual Drano, when was that?" Blair laughed out. "Was I of any help?"

"The night of the blackout when I pretended to be Lady Marcus," Chuck said.

"So then probably not," she frowned, "I'm sorry. Had I known your predicament, I might have been more accommodating."

"After everything, I think if I'd told you, you would have cut it off."

"I'm sure that's not true," she laughed, "It's too much fun to play with."

"Ew, gross," Serena cringed.

"More fun than mine," Nate asked.

"Oh, god yes," Blair exclaimed.

"Hey!"

"Thank you," Chuck pulled Blair in for a kiss.

"No making out at the table," Serena scolded them as she threw a piece of bread at them.

"Grow up, Serena," Blair muttered. "We kiss. It happens."

"It's like watching our parents make out," Nate cringed.

"But so much fun when you're on the receiving end of these beautiful lips," Chuck replied as he pulled Blair to him again.

Blair put one around Chuck's neck and a hand on the side of his face as they kissed again.

"So much fun," Chuck murmured.

"I know what's more fun," she whispered as she pulled away.

"Good things come to she who waits," Chuck teased her.

"She won't be waiting for long," she raised her eyebrow suggestively.

"No, not long at all," Chuck shook his head with a soft smile.

"God, get a room," Serena groaned as she threw another piece of bread in their direction.

"What a marvelous idea," Blair sighed.

"And S, stop trying to instigate a food fight," Chuck scolded as he picked up a piece of the thrown bread and threw it back at her.

"Guys, c'mon, this isn't Animal House," Nate reminded them.

"Could you have picked a more dated reference?" Blair teased as she threw the other piece of bread in his direction.

"Probably, but it was the first one that came to me," Nate threw a piece of bread at her.

"Are we really going to do this?" Chuck inquired as he looked around the table at all the potential ammunition they had at their fingertips.

Serena was the first to drop her bread and put her hands up in surrender. Blair followed suit and glared Nate in surrender.

"Too bad," Chuck sighed, "I would have loved to see how Serena wore the pasta."

"Maybe another time," Blair patted his hand.

"Promise?" he chuckled.

"Sure," Blair nodded. "Maybe when we all have dinner together at the new house."

"Are you sure you want to do that to our new maid, whoever she may be?"

"Perhaps we'll rent out a room somewhere," Blair replied as she amended her original response. "I don't want my new home to take on such a mess."

"How excited are you to be moving into your very own home tomorrow?" Serena inquired.

"Very," Blair smiled. "It's all come together so perfectly. The apartment's all ready for Cyrus. He'll be moving in soon. The nursery and the master bedroom are perfect. I can't wait to sleep there tomorrow night."

"Have you tested out the bed yet to ensure that it will stand up to the workout you two will surely put it through?" Nate inquired.

"That is none of your business," Blair told her ex-boyfriend. "Unlike you, I like keeping my sex life private."

"Come on, we're all friends here," Nate baited her.

"Back off, Nate."

"Someone is grumpy tonight," Nate snickered.

Blair kicked Nate in the shin.

"Ow!"

"Serves you right, Archibald," Chuck laughed out.

"Let's just order," Serena cut in.

"God, that's going to leave a bruise," Nate complained.

"Consider it payback for the bruise you left after cotillion," Blair smirked.

"What bruise?" Nate looked at her in confusion.

"The one on my leg from when you dug your knee into it."

"He still does that," Serena groaned in sympathy.

"What is this; pick on Nate for his lack of sexual prowess and manners night," Nate looked pissed.

"Appears to be," Blair grinned.

"I'm with Serena," Chuck said. "Let's order."

"Order for me," Blair requested as she stood up and kissed his cheek softly, "I'm going to call Dorota to check on the twins."

"Alright," Chuck nodded.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Blair and Chuck were about to leave the penthouse for the last time when Chuck stopped and looks around.

"What's wrong?" Blair asked as she rubbed his shoulder gently.

"I shared a lot of misery and worry with these walls not so long ago," Chuck replied as he looked at her with a small smile. "Not to mention self-hatred."

"Chuck," Blair shook her head. "That part of our life is over."

"I thought I'd be sadder that it's gone," Chuck admitted. "It was supposed to be my legacy, but all it ended up being was my misguided attempt to best my father."

"Look at me," Blair turned his face to hers. "You did best your father but not just in business. You bested your father as a human being."

"This was our first real home together."

"I know," Blair put her hands in his. "But, it's time to move on. We can't stand still anymore. This place was good for us when we were childless, and when we were just figuring out to be co-parents. I was still recovering, but now it's time for a bigger place."

"The only time I've ever even felt like I had a home was when you were here with me."

"Well, you still have a home," Blair smiled. "You have one with me and our children. It's the same way for me. You and the twins are home for me, Chuck."

"I've never been more excited about moving in my life," he admitted, "Exercising all these demons is an amazing feeling."

"Do you want a minute?" Blair asked motioning around them. "I can meet you in the lobby."

"I'll be right down," he nodded as he kissed her softly.

"I love you," Blair smiled as she got into the elevator.

"God, I hate this place," Chuck groaned as he looked around.

_Then what are you still doing here?_

Chuck looked around, half expecting to see his father because he could swear that he just heard his voice.

"I'm losing my mind," Chuck shook his head as he tried to shake the sound of his father's voice.

_This place is a reminder of all the things you did to drive your family away. You're well rid of it._

"To hell with it," Chuck threw up his hands as the image of his father filled his mind. If he was going crazy, he might as well have this conversation first. "You were such an asshole. I cannot believe that I actually felt the need to prove myself to you even when you were alive."

_Stop trying to prove yourself to me. Prove yourself to your family._

"That's the thing about families," Chuck snarled, "You don't have to prove yourself. Love is supposed to be unconditional. All my children want is to be loved. That's all I wanted, but you were too selfish to give me that. You were a horrible, angry man, and I'm better without you influencing my life."

_But I'm still here and as long as that's true, I'm still influencing your life. Let go, Charles. I was a bastard. You deserved better. You know that and so you'll do better._

"That's the first thing you've ever said that made sense to me, and it comes after you're dead. You're just my conscience getting the best of me, a figment of my imagination, not even real."

Suddenly the image he saw before him vanished and he was alone as he was before.

_Then you should really listen because it's coming from inside you. Goodbye Charles._

"Goodbye, Bart," Chuck stated as he took one last look around and then stepped on the elevator to meet Blair in the lobby.

Blair was waiting for him as she leaned against the wall. She smiled at him, "I turned in our keys. You okay?"

"I'm fantastic actually," he told her as he pressed her up against the wall more firmly and kissed her soundly.

"Wow," Blair said when they parted. "What was that for?"

"Because I love you," he told her. "Do I need another reason?"

"Never," Blair smiled. "You ready? Lily's meeting us with the children at the Brownstone in about twenty minutes."

"I've never been more ready," Chuck told her as he grasped her hand and led her towards the glass doors that led to the limo waiting outside. He said a few goodbyes to the familiar faced employees he passed, but never looked back.

Blair snuggled close to Chuck as they sat in the limo. She picked up his hand and leaned her head on his shoulder,

"You're quiet."

"So are you."

"Just tired. I was up early packing the last of the twins' things," Blair said. "But you're introspective. Bad things happen, Bass, when you get introspective."

"It's just weird saying goodbye to that place," Chuck played with her fingers. "I thought we'd be there for a while longer."

"We are a little ahead of the regularly scheduled program," Blair agreed.

"Too far ahead?" he inquired.

"No," Blair shook her head. "We're exactly where we're supposed to be."

"Are you excited for our first night in our new home?" he inquired as he raised an eyebrow, "Or are you too tired to celebrate?"

"I'm sure I'll find my second wind," she laughed.

"You were up before the sun packing the last of our things," Chuck said. "No pushing yourself. You're not cooking dinner tonight. We can order out."

"Bossy. I like it," Blair smirked.

"It's going to take a little getting used to not being able to call up room service whenever we don't feel like cooking," Chuck smiled.

"We'll figure it out," she assured him, "And I like cooking, so that won't happen all that often."

"If Eleanor could hear you now," Chuck shook his head.

Blair laughed, "I think she'd be as horrified as she would have if she'd

seen the way I was sitting or rather lying on the couch after her wake."

"Did you talk to Dorota?"

"Yes, she packed up the rest of my things and Cyrus' and had them sent to the house. She said Serena still won't look her in the eye."

"Has she made a decision about which of the two jobs offers she's going to take?"

"She did," Blair nodded as a bit of sadness was reflected in her eyes. "We have a new head of housekeeping at the hotel."

"I'm sorry," Chuck said. "I know you were hoping she'd work at the Brownstone."

"I think this will make her happier."

"Do you really think that?"

"I don't know," Blair shook her head. "But let's hold off on hiring a maid for a few weeks just in case she changes her mind, okay?"

"We can just hire a temp," Chuck nodded, "I don't want you to feel as though you have to clean the entire brownstone all on your own."

"I did clean my apartment when I lived in Jersey," Blair reminded him.

"Which was about the size of our new bathroom," Chuck responded.

"That's going to be fun to use to soak in at the end of long days," Blair smiled at him.

"Together of course," he added.

"Of course," she smirked. "I talked to Cyrus. He said the sale's going forward quickly and that he should be back in the states soon."

"Which I'm sure excites you to no end."

"It does," Blair smiled. "Do you want to come with me to Paris to help him pack, or am I going solo?"

"I suppose that depends on when you'll be going to Paris and how long you'll be staying," Chuck replied.

"Not longer than a couple of days," Blair said. "I'm just going to help him pack up my mother's things."

"I suppose we could sneak away for a weekend," he proposed, "Perhaps we should see if Lily could watch the children for the weekend."

"An entire ocean away from our children," Blair looked at him questioningly. "Are we ready for that?"

"Probably not," he laughed, "But we'll have to do it eventually."

"No, we don't," she gasped.

"Blair," Chuck looked at her seriously. "We can't take them with us everywhere we go. At some point we need to do things without them."

"It doesn't have to be now, does it?" she inquired. Her eyes showed she was nearly panicking at the thought. She could feel her heart hammer a little harder.

"We'll talk about it again at another point in time," Chuck kissed the top of her head. "We're almost home."

Her relief was immediate as their home came into view. What was once a look of panic was now one of glee.

Blair charged towards the front door with childlike enthusiasm. It was all Chuck could do to keep up with her. He grasped her hand just as she was putting the key into the lock.

"Hold on there, Waldorf," Chuck told her as he snatched the key from her, unlocking it quickly and turning the knob. Before she knew what was happening, he had swept her off her feet and carried her inside their home.

"Put me down," she laughed a she tried to squirm out of his grasp. "We're not married. That's a married tradition."

"Just practicing," Chuck kissed her as he walked into the living room and set her on her feet as his eyes settled on the coffee table. "Does Lily have a key?"

"Yes, I gave one to her for emergencies," Blair nodded as her eyes trained on what his were locked on to. "And that's her purse. Lily?"

"I thought I heard you two," Lily came in from the kitchen. "I was just putting some things in the kitchen for you. Eric and I stopped at that bakery down the street. This is a fantastic neighborhood. Rufus and I should look into buying some real estate here. He'd be far more comfortable here than at the Palace."

"How is Rufus?" Blair asked as she took a seat on the couch and wiggled around a little finding a comfortable spot. "Eric says he'll be released soon."

"He's doing very well in treatment. We've actually been going to therapy together. He's beginning to open up about Jenny's death and how it's affected him. It's a tiny step, but it's a start," Lily proclaimed.

"That's great, Lily," Blair said. "You know Serena and I looked at a Brownstone about a block from here. It needs a lot less work than this one did and the top level is studio space. The former owner was an artist."

"I'm calling my real estate agent as soon as Rufus gets out of treatment. He could use a change of scenery."

"And I think it also has an apartment in the basement if Dan doesn't want to go back to Brooklyn," Serena said as she entered, having heard the tail end of the conversation with Nate behind her. "We come bearing pizza."

"Just what my heart needs, artery clogging pizza. I'll go get the plates," Blair headed for the kitchen and grabbed the plates from the kitchen and set the dining room table while Nate put the boxes down.

"You know when two people move into a new home they usually have boxes and boxes of stuff to unpack. All you seem to have are a few suitcases," Serena observed.

"It pays to have money to hire people do to all that for them," Chuck responded.

"Dorota said to tell you that the rest of the boxes would be here by Monday," Nate said as he took a seat at the table. "I thought Eric was here."

"He's upstairs," Lily said. "I'll get him."

"I'll get him," Blair said. "Eric! Food!"

"Blair," Lily looked at her surprised.

"It works on Dan."

Sure enough Eric charged down the stairs moments later with the baby monitor in his hands which he promptly handed to Blair.

"Cool, pizza," Eric grabbed a plate and sat next to Chuck. "Twins are asleep."

"Thanks Eric. You can leave after lunch if you want," Blair said. "See if you can salvage the rest of your Saturday."

"No thanks," he shook his head, "I think I'll take my own tour of your new home. It could very well take me all day. This place is huge. You should provide guests maps so they don't get lost."

"You're always welcome here," Chuck said putting a hand on his shoulder. "And if you want, feel free to draw up those maps."

"One question, where is the shopping mall, the east or west wing?" Eric eyes brightened in amusement.

"That would be Blair's closet," Chuck laughed.

"Funny," Blair said dryly. "So, Dorota has officially accepted the offer to be head of housekeeping at the hotel."

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart," Lily responded, "I'm sure you were hoping she'd want to come work here instead."

"I'll be okay. I'm more worried about what the penthouse is going to look like when Dorota doesn't work there anymore."

"Hey, Nate and I are not that bad," Serena stated defensively.

"Now that we've finished the interview, are there any questions you'd like to ask about the job," Chuck pretended to be interviewing Blair for a job.

"Yes. Why did the last housekeeper quit?"

"Because my step-sister can't control her vocal chords while she's in the throes."

"I'm not hearing this," Lily groaned as she suddenly disappeared into the kitchen.

"I hate you two," Serena pouted. "I still can't make eye contact with Dorota."

"That's not our fault," Chuck laughed.

"Can we change the subject, please?" Eric asked. "The last thing I want to discuss is my sister's sex life."

"Hear, hear," Serena agreed. "Can I get a tour of this place? I haven't seen it all put together yet."

"Tours will begin in approximately thirty minutes," Chuck did his best tour guide impression. "Be sure to purchase your tickets prior to the start of the tour. Admission is a reasonable thousand dollars per person."

"I think your definition of reasonable is a bit different than the rest of us," Nate shook his head, "Billionaire Bass."

"Lily, tour time. Are you coming?" Blair called as she got up.

At the end of the tour, Lily was raving about the decorations. "The nursery is the cutest thing I've ever seen. I cannot wait to see what you do with their bedrooms when they get old enough to have their own rooms."

"Wait, what about your room?" Serena spoke up as they began heading downstairs.

"Sorry, not on the tour," Blair informed her.

"Not fair," Serena protested.

"Sorry. A bedroom is a private sanctuary," Blair shook her head.

"I saw your room when you lived at the penthouse. I was in your room at The Empire."

"This is different."

"You have a stripper pole, don't you?" Serena guessed.

"Mind out of the gutter please," Blair gasped.

"And mirrors on the ceiling," Nate added.

"Don't push your adolescent fantasies off on me and Chuck," Blair rolled her eyes. "Chuck, they're being vulgar."

"Archibald, I can assure you that there are no stripper poles, mirrors on the ceiling, or any other sex devices," Chuck glared at his best friend. "Our bedroom is private, for the two of us."

"Thank you," Blair kissed him. "Now, did everyone receive their invitations to opening night at Sebastian's?"

"Of course," Serena stated, "You sent them by private messenger. You must have employed Chuck's PI to track us down. I was leaving my gynecologist when I was approached with the envelope."

"I thought I was being summoned to court," Nate added.

"Wouldn't be the first time," Chuck shrugged.

Serena giggled and then cleared her throat at the look Nate sent her.

"So, does that mean you're all coming?" Blair asked. "Lily, will Rufus be able to attend?"

"I'll ask him at our next therapy session," Lily assured her.

"Eric, you're quiet. You did get the invite, right?"

"I got it," Eric assured her. "How he found me at that club, I don't know, but I got it and yes, I'm coming."

"Club?" Lily inquired as she eyed her son curiously.

"Chicken marsala?" Chuck inquired.

"Okay, someone please tell me what the deal is with this chicken marsala," Lily demanded.

"Lily, trust me when I say that there are some things a mother shouldn't know," Blair said. "Anyone want some tea?"

"Charles Bass, where have you been taking my son? Not someplace illegal, I hope."

"Lily, that hurts," Chuck told her.

"Mom, it's nothing bad, at least nothing too bad," Eric spoke up, "It's just a strip club."

"STRIP CLUB!" Lily exclaimed. She looked between the pair in confusion.

"A male strip club," Eric explained.

"Charles Bass, what the hell do you think you're doing taking my little boy to a strip club," Lily gasped.

"Lily, calm down. We were just having some fun," Chuck said.

"Fun?"

"Mom, it was harmless," Eric defended. "It's not Serena making Dorota quit by going at it with Nate everywhere and anywhere."

"And I think that's my cue to go into the other room," Serena got up.

"Eric," Nate looked pissed.

"No, I'm not a little boy any more. I'm eighteen. I deserve to have a little fun every now and then. I'm not going to raves and doing lines of coke with random strangers. I'm not coming home completely bombed off my gourd. I went to a strip club with my brother and let off a little steam. There is nothing wrong with it. I get good grades, and I stay out of trouble. In case you've missed it, I have a sense of direction."

"It's not that I don't think you have direction but you're still very young."

"Blair was in Victrola when she was younger than I am right now and Chuck owned the place for crying out loud," Eric reminded his mother. "And I won't even go into what Serena was doing."

"Hey, don't drag me into this," Serena exclaimed as she came back in.

"I'm sorry," Lily said to her son. "But you're my baby and I worry about you because of everything that you've endured. I just want to protect you a bit more than I did Serena."

"I don't need protecting. I need to be treated like all your other children. I've earned that right," Eric replied.

"You've more than earned that right," Lily nodded. "And I apologize."

Blair slapped Chuck's shoulder as Lily went to hug Eric.

"What was that for?" Chuck snarled.

"For introducing your brother to that," she replied.

"It wasn't the first time I'd been there," Eric admitted.

Everyone looked at Eric in surprise.

"Elliot and I got fake ids and went a few times," he explained.

"Who-where did you get fake IDs"" Lily folded her arms.

Blair exchanged a look with Serena and then Nate and Chuck.

"Does that really matter now, Lily?" Blair asked.

"Yes, I want to know who would give my under aged son a fake ID," Lily demanded.

"He probably got it from Penelope's older brother," Serena admitted. "And by the way, I told you to stop snooping in my room, Eric."

Eric merely shrugged in reply.

"Did all of you have fake id's?" Lily inquired.

"Still do," Chuck admitted proudly.

"Me too," Blair nodded. "I say that because I know that you can't ground me considering I am a mom and not one of your kids."

"Don't be so sure," Lily narrowed her eyes.

"Well, I don't live under your roof anymore," Serena pointed out. "And I have one too, and so does Nate."

"And so does Dan," Blair decided to chime in.

"I don't believe this," Lily shook her head. "Eric, I want yours."

"Mom," Eric protested.

"You still live under my roof," Lily reminded him.

"Lily, I'm going to speak on Eric's behalf," Chuck spoke up, "You can take his id, but he'll just get another one."

"It's true," Nate said. "My mom found mine and I just went and got another one. This time I hid it at Chuck's."

"And I don't know what you're so upset about," Serena spoke up, "You surely had one."

"And I was pregnant at your age," Lily replied.

"Been there," Blair chimed up.

Chuck smirked, "Lily, Eric's an adult now. You can't control him or what he does. He'll be at school soon and in a dorm."

"Actually, I was wondering if I could move in with Serena and Nate," Eric said.

"No," Serena, Lily, and Blair said together.

"Wow. Stereo," Nate nodded.

"It was just a thought," Eric shrugged.

"And if it was just Serena, I'd be fine with it," Lily said. "But after hearing why Dorota quit, I don't want you seeing things you shouldn't.

"Mom, I know Serena's not a virgin," Eric said.

"Great. Don't mind me. Humiliation's really good for my coloring."

"Then keep your business in your room, van der Woodsen," Chuck responded.

"We could try it," Serena said.

"We can talk about this more later," Lily sighed. "We still have time to sort all of this out. But for now, I think we should leave Blair and Chuck to relax in their home on their first night here."

"Like they're actually going to relax," Nate laughed.

Blair slapped Nate upside the back of his head as she shoved him towards the door.

"Ow!" Nate exclaimed.

"Keep the commentary to yourself," she scolded him.

"I still say you two have a stripper pole in your bedroom," Nate said.

Blair kicked him in the shin.

"Ow! Stop trying to damage me," Nate whined.

"Stop saying stupid things then," Blair demanded.

"He can't help it," Chuck said before whispering in Blair's ear, "It's all the weed."

"Enjoy your new home," Lily stated. "We cannot wait for the housewarming party that is sure to come."

"Perhaps they'll forget to lock their bedroom door," Nate whispered in Serena's ear. "And I can prove they have that pole."

"Keep it up, Nate, and I won't forget to lock my door," Serena said.

"I thought they'd never leave," Blair announced once she and Chuck had been left alone.

"Twins and then our room," Chuck smiled.

"I'll race you," she smirked as she took off before he could respond.


	35. Chapter 35

"Do you think we're finally ready?" Blair inquired as she helped Chuck fix his tie as they readied themselves for the opening gala at their newly opened hotel.

"Wow," Chuck looked at the back of her dress in the mirror. "I think you're missing the back of your dress."

"Do you like it?" Blair asked. "It was one of the last things my mom designed."

"It's amazing," Chuck told her as he caressed her lower back softly, "But there is a slight problem."

"What do you mean?" she pouted.

"I'm not going to be able to keep my hands at appropriate places," he groaned as she spun to give him the full affect.

"Why do you think I'm wearing it?" she winked.

"You play dirty," Chuck groaned.

"I learned from the master," Blair smiled. "Now, I think we should get going. Being late to our own party is very bad for business."

"Lily will be here soon. She said Rufus is coming with her," Chuck said as Blair picked up her purse as they exited the penthouse that they were staying in for the night. It had been Blair's idea to be the first guests to check into the hotel, and he Bassified it by reserving the penthouse suite. "She also said they were going to cut out early and relieve Dorota and Vanya, so they could be here too."

"I can't believe we couldn't find one competent baby-sitter for the night," Blair rolled her eyes.

"Everyone wanted to be at the gala of the century," he replied, "It's a compliment to your event planning skills, Beautiful."

"We interviewed at least two dozen people," Blair reminded him.

"And you ran them all off with your questioning," Chuck laughed.

"Well, we can't employ someone that would crack so easily under the pressure," she shrugged, "And those questions weren't that personal. That one lady was entirely too sensitive."

"She left in tears," Chuck reminded her.

"I asked her normal questions."

"You asked about her criminal activities."

"And she started to sob thereby proving she had criminal activities."

"You are every bit the momma bear that is obscenely protective of her cubs," he chuckled.

"What can I say? I want my cubs to be well taken care of."

"Shall we go? I'd hate for Cinderella to be late for her own ball."

"Let's stop on the second floor so we can use the grand staircase."

"You've always wanted to make that royal entrance, haven't you," he laughed.

"I am Queen B," Blair reminded him.

"May I be the escort?"

"Always," Blair smiled.

"Are you nervous?" he asked as he took a deep breath as they walked arm and arm to the elevator.

"No," she shook her head, "Not even a little bit. Between the two of us, no detail has gone unnoticed."

"Good," Chuck smiled. "There will be dancing in the lobby, food in Sebastian's, and a place to relax in Sabrina's. Everything's set."

"All the makings of a smashing success," she proclaimed.

"Was there ever any doubt?"

Blair smiled and let out a little squeal. "This is going work."

The elevator doors opened and Blair and Chuck exited onto the second floor before they made their way to the grand staircase that led into the lobby. All eyes were on the pair as the descended down the staircase. The lobby was already about half full. Blair picked out Nate, Serena, and Dan standing by the front desk while Lily and Rufus were admiring a painting on the opposite wall.

"Blair, this place is incredible," Serena squealed as she dashed over to hug her best friend.

"Thanks S," Blair accepted the hug and then looked towards Nate. "Where's your dad?"

"Proving that he has the skills to be your new concierge," Nate pointed out the Captain who was working the room to drum up business.

Blair smiled and then looked back at him, "Did Anne accept the invite?"

"She'll be here," Nate nodded as he looked around to take in the decor. "I have to say, Blair, you did a fantastic job here."

"Doesn't look like the Muppet movie hotel anymore, huh?"

"It's the most magnificent thing I have ever seen," Serena marveled. "Not that I expected anything less from the two of you."

"Did you guys reserve yourselves a room for tonight?"

"Of course," Nate nodded as he held up his key, "And I like the old key touch you added for the suites."

"No detail was too small," Chuck replied.

"Dan, did you talk to your dad about artwork for the café?" Blair asked as she accepted a drink from a circulating waiter.

"I did," Dan nodded, "He has the perfect artist in mind."

"Fantastic," Blair smiled. "So, how were Dorota and Vanya when you dropped Jonathan off?"

"Anxious to be relieved," Dan replied, "Dorota's afraid she's going to miss the usual drama."

"I am determined that there will be no drama tonight," Blair shook her head.

"It's good to have goals, B," Eric said as he walked up.

"Hey," Blair hugged Eric. "Solo tonight?"

"Yes," Eric nodded, "But there's a server milling around that has already slipped me his number. I hope you don't have any rules about employee not dating each other."

"None whatsoever but will he get jealous if you dance with your surrogate big sister?"

"I get the first dance, Beautiful," Chuck interrupted them.

"Second one?" Blair asked of Eric.

"I'll see if I can get Mom to dance."

"Hey, what about me?" Serena pouted.

"I suppose you could do," Eric sighed dramatically.

"I'll be back in a little bit," Serena told Nate.

"So will we," Blair said as she took Chuck's hand.

Nate and Dan were left to look at each other.

"I'm not dancing with you, Man," Dan shook his head.

"I'm not dancing with you either," Nate added as they both struggled to contain their laughter.

"Of course not. I wouldn't let you lead," Dan said.

"Drink?"

"God, yes," Dan nodded.

"They seem really happy," Nate observed as he watched Chuck and Blair dance.

"I hope it stays that way," Dan said. "They really love each other."

"Kind words for Chuck Bass," Nate was surprised. "Thought you were still mad."

"Jenny made her own decisions."

"You finally see that," Nate replied with a relieved smile.

"It's not easy to say," Dan admitted, "She was my sister, and I'll always see her as that little girl, but she wasn't. She'd grown up and was able to make her own choices that evening."

Nate gently slapped him on the shoulder, "Wherever she is, she knows you loved her."

"Thanks, Man."

"Nathaniel," Anne's voice intruded on the conversation.

"Mom, you made it. You know Dan, right?"

"Lily's stepson," Anne nodded.

"It's nice to see you again, Mrs. Archibald."

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to attend your sister's funeral, Daniel. I'd like to pay my respects to your father and Lily. Are they here?"

"Yes, they're around here somewhere, but not for long. They've pulled baby-sitting duty a little later."

"Well, if I don't see them tonight, you'll tell them I asked about them?"

"I will," Dan nodded.

"Mom, have you seen Dad?"

"Not yet," Anne said stiffly.

"Right, you're not really looking. Is Grandfather here? I know Blair and Chuck sent him an invitation."

"Tripp beat them with his own invitation. I believe Maureen's announcing an impending arrival tonight."

"Another victim in the Vanderbilt line," Nate shook his head. "I feel sorry for the kid already."

"Maybe we'll get lucky and it'll be a girl," Anne smiled as she looked around. "Evelyn would have loved this. She always loved a good party. Her wedding reception was so much fun."

"Don't bring her up tonight with Chuck," Nate advised his mother. "He deserves a night of pure happiness."

"I won't," Anne promised. "So, are you too cool to dance with your mom?"

"No," Nate smiled, "Since Eric snagged my date, I'm all yours."

Anne smiled and took Nate's hand as they walked onto the dance floor.

"Daniel," Lily and Rufus walked up. "I can't convince your father to dance with me yet. Are you interested?"

"Us Humphrey men have two left feet. Do you know what you're in for?" Dan inquired.

"I've danced with your father plenty of times," Lily assured. "Just let me lead."

"Done," Dan nodded as he let Lily lead him onto the dance floor.

-x-x-x-x-

Blair sat down at a table in the cafe and smiled tiredly. The party was still going strong, but she needed a small breather. It was quiet and peaceful in the cafe. Some soft music played over the speakers and a few of the guests were browsing the music section while others looked at books.

"I think we're a hit," Chuck found her and massaged her shoulders.

"That feels nice, thank you," Blair sighed as she relaxed against his touch. "How's Dorota doing? She keeps threatening to start a conga line."

"It's in full swing with Dorota leading the charge," he laughed.

Blair giggled and tilted her head towards the seat across from her, "Take a seat. I can hear how tired you are in your voice."

"I'm slowing down on you, I'm afraid," he replied as he took the seat, "Being a parent does really slow a person down."

"But it's in a good way," she said before she smiled her thanks to the waitress who set some coffee down for the two of them. "Besides, you've been getting up at six and going non-stop until eleven each night this week. If you weren't tired, I'd think you were on something."

"I'm on that drug called love," he told her.

"That's really cheesy, Bass," she scolded him.

Chuck leaned forward and kissed her. "Speaking of tired, you look exhausted. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she assured him, "And I promise to have enough energy to properly christen our suite. It's kind of poetic. We'll be the first people to have sex in that penthouse."

"As it should be," he nodded, "In time, we should work on blessing all the rooms in the hotel."

Blair giggled as her head dropped. Then she looked back at him, "Have you called Lily yet?"

"Have you?" he challenged her.

"There are four babies and three are under the age of one. I would be remiss if I didn't check up on her."

"I suppose the question shouldn't be if you called her, but how many times you called her," Chuck conceded.

"Three," Blair said quickly.

"Blair," Chuck prodded.

"Okay, six," Blair admitted.

"Did you want to go home and check on them?" he inquired.

"If we go home, we'll never want to leave," Blair told him, "And the penthouse deserves a proper christening."

Chuck put his hand on hers, "Okay. I think the conga line is breaking up. Want to dance with me?"

"I do, but not any more of the vertical kind tonight."

"We can't leave," Chuck told her. "It's our party."

"Who is going to notice?" she inquired as she looked around.

"Our friends, the press, and all of our guests."

"None of which matter to me as much as you do," Blair replied.

"We can hide in here a little while longer," Chuck nodded.

"I've got a better idea," Blair looked around. "You want to dance? I like this song."

"Didn't I just suggest that?" he chuckled as he offered her his hand as he pulled her to her feet.

"I meant in here," Blair replied as she put her arms around his neck, "Do you remember the first time we really danced together? Not just that group dancing we did until middle school but really danced with each other."

"Ninth grade formal," Chuck nodded. "Nate deserted you to get high."

"You were always there to save the day," she replied as she ran her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck.

"You wore a red dress with black lace," he recalled. "You looked amazing."

"And you wore a red tuxedo jacket that matched my dress perfectly," she smiled.

"Someone snapped a picture of us," Chuck remembered.

"Serena," Blair filled in the bit of trivia he couldn't remember. "I swiped the picture from her room."

"And I swiped it from you," he chuckled.

"Where is it?"

"Framed and in my office," Chuck told her.

"Make me a copy. I want to hang it up in the living room."

"I'll get right on that," he assured her.

"In the morning," she added, "The only thing I want you on tonight is me."

"I'd take you right now if we weren't in a room full of people," Chuck told her. "Besides, we've been gone too long."

"Give it another minute."

"What? Why?"

"Serena's about to find us. Let's hide from her."

"You know Serena," Chuck told her seriously. "The girl's part bloodhound. We could hide in the polar ice caps. She'd still find us."

"But it would take her awhile, and give us time to play," she smirked.

"There you two are," Serena said from the door. "Why are you hiding in here?"

"We weren't hiding," Blair replied, "We were just taking a break."

Serena looked around, "This place looks pretty great, B. Looks a lot like your old one in Jersey."

"That was the goal."

Serena nodded, "Anyway, you have to come out here. Penelope's mom is here and you have to see her dress."

"Does Chuck need to cover his eyes?"

"Oh it won't help. It'll be on page six tomorrow as a fashion 'don't ever'."

"Like mother, like daughter," Chuck replied. "Penelope never had much fashion sense either."

"True," Blair nodded. "But Serena's right. We should get out there. You owe S a dance."

"I do, don't I," Chuck nodded.

"Yes," Serena nodded. "And Nate wants a spin around the floor with you B."

"Ugh, and my toes were finally starting to get used to dancing on their own."

"Think of it this way," Chuck whispered to Blair as they followed Serena. "We'll both be protecting our toes."

c-c-c-c-c-c

Blair wore Chuck's shirt and his dress socks with her hair up in a messy ponytail as she stood on the balcony looking out over the twinkling lights of the city. The party had finally broken up around two, and Blair and Chuck had fallen into bed and christened the penthouse suite properly. Chuck had fallen asleep, but Blair was still wide-awake. She'd been focused on their big night, but now she couldn't stop thinking about some news she'd received earlier that day.

"You shouldn't be outside without a sweater," Chuck scolded her softly as he came behind her to wrap his arms around her waist as he began to nibble on the nape of her neck. "You know the doctors frown upon you shivering. It unnecessarily taxes your heart."

Blair smiled as she rested her hands on the arms around her stomach, "I couldn't sleep."

"I can take you back to bed and wear you out some more," he suggested.

"I need to talk to you about something," Blair said softly.

"That sounds a little serious," he replied as he spun her around so he could look into her eyes.

"Are Sabrina and Sebastian going to be enough for you?" she asked quietly.

"I'm not understanding what you mean by that," he looked at her in confusion.

"We've kind of danced around the subject of more children, but now I'm seriously asking if you are going to be okay with Sabrina and Sebastian being it for us."

"I guess I've never really given it much thought. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the two that we have, but I don't know, maybe if the time was right," Chuck began.

"I can't, Bass," she stopped his rambling.

"You can't what?"

Blair leaned back against the railing but that was as far as Chuck would let her go, "I went to see the doctor for my normal check up, and I asked about when we could have more kids. He said with the damage to my heart muscle more children is way too dangerous for me."

"So, you could die if you became pregnant again," he summarized. Just saying the words out loud hurt. It was how he lost his mother, and he couldn't lose Blair the same way.

"Maybe," she nodded as tears tumbled down her cheeks, "So are Sebastian and Sabrina going to be enough for you, and I need you to be completely honest with me."

"If it means you and me until we're old and gray, then yes they will absolutely be enough for me," Chuck cradled her face in his hands. "Will they be enough for you?"

"I wanted to make it up to you," Blair smiled sadly. "You missed our children coming into this world because I was stupid and scared. I wanted to make that up to you."

"You have nothing to make up to me," he assured her as he wiped the tears off to her cheeks with his thumbs.

"You should have been there. You should have been holding my hand. You should have been able to hear their first cries and cut their umbilical cords. I denied you that."

"Blair, I disappeared for three months. I hid from the world. You had every right to be mad at me. You also had every right to be scared. I didn't react well when we thought you were pregnant the first time."

"That was high school," Blair frowned. "And you didn't know if it was yours or Nate's. There was never a doubt about it this time."

"If it'd been real and mine back in high school-"

"There would have been a hole shaped like you in the door of your hotel room at the Palace," Blair teased.

"Perhaps, or maybe even a fist through the wall in the shape of Bart's," he nodded, "But I would have come to my senses."

"I know," Blair nodded. "Because, no matter what, you'd never be an absentee father. You know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of that."

"And I'm proving that with our children," he nodded, "But if they are the only children that you and I are meant to have, then I can accept that."

"You're pretty great, Bass. Did I ever tell you that?" Blair came back into his arms.

"You might have mentioned it once or twice before," he nodded.

"It might take me a while to be okay with this. It'll probably take me longer to not feel like a failure as a woman."

"Don't ever say that ever again," he scolded her. "You have given me the three most precious things in the world. You could never be a failure."

"Okay, I know what two of those things are, but I'm not sure on the third."

"Sabrina, Sebastian, and their beautiful mother," he explained as he kissed her softly.

Blair wrapped her arms around his neck, "I want to go back to bed."

"Put the mattress through a proper workout before the masses can get to it?" he smirked.

"Or we could just stay right here," Blair looked around them.

"Sex on the balcony," he raised an eyebrow, "Are you really okay with such a public display? People could see or hear us."

"Yeah, it wouldn't look very good for the owners to be on 'Page 6'."

"I don't give a damn about 'Page 6'," he told her, "I'll take you anywhere I can get you. Do want you want. Damn the consequences."

"Bed, you, me," Blair decided. "We have to start remolding the Bass name. I want it to mean something different for when our kids grow up."

"I want it to be something that they can be proud of," he nodded before he added, "Perhaps that their mother could be proud of when she's ready to add it."

"I already am proud," Blair told him. "And by the way? I love you. Always have."

"Always will," Chuck finished for her.

The End

-x-x-x-x-x-

Thank you to all the usual suspects. I can't tell you how much it's meant that you've stuck with me since the beginning. You know who you are. My beta rocks and I thank her for it. There is a sequel in the works if you are all interested.


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